Characters: Nick, Connor, Lester, and the baby pyroraptors: Sonny, Bluebird, and Amelia
Spoilers: None
A/N: I own nothing of "Primeval" that belongs to Impossible Pictures and I make no money from this, clearly. However the baby pyroraptors are creations of myself, captsoontirfel (Amelia) and mega_bug (Sonny).
Summary: A clear example why one shouldn't use a baby pyroraptor as a paper weight.

Paper Tonight, Raptor's Delight

"Get that out of your mouth!"

Nick looked up from his desk and smirked lightly. The document he was writing was tedious and mostly boring since the events that had occurred earlier had no real story to tell. So it came to pass that any break from the monotony would be welcomed with open arms.

"Having a bit of trouble with the baby are you?" Nick couldn't help the jest.

"No--!" came the quick reply. Connor straightened and in his hand he held a half-chewed object that Nick couldn't readily identify. As Nick raised a skeptical eyebrow, Connor immediately added, "No… see, everything is under control."

"Really? Then what is that?" Nick indicated the slimy thing in Connor's grasp.

"This well," Connor moved the thing to his other hand and grinned boyishly at it, "Well it was Jabba the Hut."

"Amelia must have chewed it pretty good then," Nick replied, laughing softly as he went back to his paper. "I hardly even recognized him."

Frowning, Connor quickly rubbed the spit from the small toy. "But there's hardly any chew marks…"

"Ah yes, I forget, Jabba always looks that disgusting."

Connor cradled the toy as the green baby raptor edged closer to him, her mouth open slightly and her legs bent in preparation for a second launch. Oblivious to Amelia's intents, Connor added, "He's not my prized one though. I wouldn't be that daft to bring him to work."

"Perhaps it's time you stop bringing your toys to work," suggested Nick with a snigger as he looked up once more from his paper. "After all, how many action figures does it make that she's eaten?"

"She only destroyed one of them and that was Jar-Jar Binks, which is okay since I didn't like that one anyways."

"Well apparently, neither did she."

Nick directed his gaze down at Amelia and sensing that trouble was brewing, Connor followed his gaze. He saw Amelia give a slight wiggle of her hips. The jungle green raptor's mouth opened as a joyful growl rumbled in her throat. Connor pulled his hand away from her, his fingers wrapping lovingly around the toy. Shaking his head, Connor told her, "No way mate, you go and chew on someone else for a change!"

Giving a sniff of annoyance, the raptor shook her head, rumbling unhappily at him. She turned from Connor and began sniffing around his desk. From the other side of Connor's desk came a startled squeak and Bluebird came darting out. She snapped at her sister before sneaking over to Nick's desk. The blue feathers along her headdress rose in the air. But Amelia wasn't interested in wrestling her younger sister today. More pressing matters were at hand. The elder raptor stalked steadily towards the garbage can.

A trill echoed in Bluebird's throat as she looked about the ARC. It was nearing lunch time and still she had not found Danny! She couldn't even catch a fresh scent of him! Just where was he? How many places could her mum hide? The raptor whined softly before turning her gaze to the person who's leg she was next to. She backed away slightly and craned her neck to get a better visual on the man.

Nick smiled down at the raptor. "Hello there little one. You and Sonny are about the only two who seem to stay out of trouble. Have you come for some attention?"

As Nick reached down to give the raptor a friendly pat, Bluebird growled at him and backed away. She could sense the tension between the true ARC leader and her mum, Danny Quinn. Nick wasn't the enemy, but he wasn't a friend of hers either. She growled once more at Nick, warning him that if he continued on this path she would bite. Knowing better than to pet a distrusting predator, Nick slowly recoiled his hand. The feathers along Bluebird's neck lowered and the raptor quickly scooted away.

"I think someone doesn't like you," teased Connor with a smirk.

Nick contemplated crumpling his paper and throwing it at Connor. "The other raptors are fine around me except her. I haven't done anything to her. But I guess that just proves how closely related to birds they are. Bluebird follows Danny and trusts him alone just like Elvis seems to have taken a liking to you."

"Yeah well, I gave him his name," replied Connor as he took his eyes from the monitor to grin childishly at Nick. "So of course he'd like me. You made yourself scarce when the raptors hatched so you can't blame them for not wanting anything to do with you."

A soft head bumped Nick's calf. Looking down, a smile spread over Nick's face and he quickly scooped up the smallest raptor. Being the height of a chicken, Sonny was the runt of the pack. His brilliant green body reflected the coloring of his mother and his red chest indicated parts of his father. But what truly made the little raptor stand out was the bits of blue along his neck feathers that spanned out into a neat headdress of yellow.

"If ever there was a raptor that could be a parrot, it would be Sonny," stated Nick with a laugh as he held the little raptor.

Not prone to periods of viciousness like the eldest of the klutch, Sonny was the most docile and also the most curious. Nick had taken a liking to the raptor and it seemed that the raptor enjoyed his company as well. Sonny trilled happily before he was placed gently on top of Nick's desk. The raptor sniffed about the desk before settling down next to Nick's paper.

"Are you going to be the good little raptor that I know you are?" Nick inquired of the raptor, who just yawned. The raptor then shut his eyes and stretched his neck out on the desk, falling asleep almost immediately. His smile growing even more, Nick said, "Now that's the kind of pet I'd like to have. One who just wants to be calm and not bite anyone."

"He makes a colorful paperweight, don't you think?"

Nick smirked and continued writing. A half hour went by before Nick caught himself staring at the clock once more. At last, the report was done! The mission had been extremely dull so why it had taken him this long to write it was beyond Nick's understanding. But at last it was finally finished! Nick leaned back in his chair, his hands stretching over his head. The small pyroraptor sitting on his desk opened his eyes slowly and sniffed the air.

Something smelled different. Tilting his head, Sonny tried to get a grasp of what it was that he smelled. He felt his attention drawn to the desk where Nick's paper lay and eyed the pen curiously. Not sure what it was, but certain that he should try and eat it, the raptor lunged forward and snatched the pen. The noise of the raptor's attack caught Nick's attention and upon seeing the raptor happily munching on his pen, Nick tried to grab it away.

But the nimble raptor jerked his head away, growling slightly as he yanked the pen out of Nick's reach. Nick made another lung for the pen, this time exclaiming, "Don't eat that! Ink is bad!"

Sonny could care less, however. The raptor leapt to the side, chirping amusedly. He bit down on the pen and with a loud crunch the casing finally broke. The sharp teeth pierced the ink cartridge and blue ink immediately began falling from the raptor's mouth. Sonny spat the pen onto the desk, coating Nick's report with the ink. The raptor shook his head, growling in disgust. Just what was that thing? Certainly it wasn't edible!

"Oh no you don't!" Nick exclaimed as he grabbed his paper. He gave the raptor a soft glare, continuing, "I tried to warn you but you wouldn't listen to me. Doesn't taste very good, now does it?"

Sonny sneezed and continued shaking his head. The feathers along his neck and body puffed out in agitation. When Nick lifted his paper and began gently dabbing at the ink splotches, the raptor tilted his head to the side. What was that silly mammal doing? Sonny barked softly, edging closer to Nick. Sensing that the little mischievous raptor was still up to no good, Nick pulled the paper closer to his chest.

"This took me all of two hours to--" But Sonny didn't care. The simple action meant only one thing:


Sonny lunged forward and with a playful growl he latched onto the paper. With skilled ease the raptor punctured the paper and began tugging it from Nick's hands. But the leader wasn't about to give up that easily. He let Sonny back away with it, hoping that the raptor would give him some room to negotiate a trade. Slowly Nick reached towards Connor's bag.

"Sonny… how would you like something a little tastier?" Nick suggested, grabbing hold of the wrapped cupcake that Amelia hadn't sniffed out yet.

Connor sharply turned his head towards Nick and protested, "Hey, what do you think you're going to do with that?"

"Sacrifices have to be made in the line of duty Connor."

"But that's my snack!"

"It's a casualty of war."

"We're in … war?" Connor looked over at Sonny and saw that the raptor had his eyes fixed on the cupcake.

For the moment however, the raptor wasn't interested in food. He wanted to play! Growling, the raptor nibbled more on the paper, gripping the now soggy parchment with zeal. He gave a little trill and squatted on the desk, his tail going high into the air.

"No no no…" Nick held his breath. Suddenly Sonny shook his head from side to side, the edge of the paper tore off. Nick groaned, dismayed at the thought of having to explain to Lester why part of the document was torn. Seizing the opportunity that the raptor had provided in releasing the paper, Nick tried to pull it away.

But Sonny wasn't done. Play! The pyroraptor gave a wiggle of its rear before launching himself at Nick. Clamping down on the paper, Sonny began pulling it back towards him. He chewed even more onto the paper, asserting dominance in this futile game of tug-o-war. Having no choice but to follow the raptor's lead, Nick let Sonny guide him over the desk while Connor watched with silent amusement. For once, Nick was going to be in trouble and not him!

"Sonny… Sonny… please…" Nick pleaded with the small Cretaceous creature. "Give it-- give it--"

The raptor turned his head slightly, his eyes gleaming with delight. The raptor's sickle claw tapped the table and Sonny trilled teasingly up at Nick. What was the human going to do now? Why wasn't he pulling back? Sonny grinned inwardly. He was stronger than this human, that's why! So much for being the runt! He could pull a human across his own desk! If only his elder brother Basil could see him!

Little did the raptor know that directly behind him was the edge of the desk. At this point Nick feared more for his paper than the raptor's safety. After all, Sonny was a durable raptor who had successfully escaped the wrath of an angry chicken. How could he be hurt in this? Only the report itself was on the brink of extinction! Nick pulled the paper towards himself, hoping to ease the raptor his way.

"Easy now Sonny. You don't want me to have to rewrite this paper again, do you?" Nick stared hopefully down at the green raptor, who just grinned back at him. From his place in front of the computer monitors, Connor leaned forward in his chair, a delightful smirk painted on his youthful features. Nick eased the paper in his direction, continuing, "Lester wouldn't be too happy if my report was late or… torn to shreds. You wouldn't want me to get in trouble, would you?"

Nick wasn't sure if the key word had been "you" or if the raptor had simply given up letting Nick feel like he was gaining ground on him for the raptor suddenly hopped backwards. Immediately the little raptor plunged over the back of the desk. The paper tore as the raptor fell, causing Nick to collapse upon the desk. Sonny's shriek was barely heard over a sharp question:

"Playing games with the raptors already?" Nick lifted his head and saw Lester staring at him with that famous frown of his. Lester folded his arms across his chest, inquiring lightly, "Since it seems that you have free time to play with the raptors, I suppose it wouldn't be too earlier to ask for the report I wanted two hours ago, would it?"

"Oh, I have it all right," Nick replied steadily as he straightened himself. As he walked around his desk, not bothering to recover any of his dignity that was shattered the moment he began the ridiculous game of wits with a baby raptor, he heard Connor suppressing laughter. This day just kept getting better and better! He thrust the half-paper into Lester's waiting hands. "There it is."

"I knew we were budgeting our paper use but I didn't mean for you to take our cost cutting to heart." Lester recoiled his other hand from the paper and gave it a shake. "Where is the other half and why is it all wet?"

A tearing noise was heard from the floor and Nick smiled wryly. "The rest of the report?" He dropped his gaze to the floor. Lester quirked a brow at the sight. "There."

Sonny lifted his head and grinned lopsidedly at the two men, his mouth blue from the ink. Clenched between his teeth was a small portion of the paper as the rest of it lay in bits surrounding the raptor. Sonny tilted his head and puffed up his headdress as if to say, "What? We're just playing!"

From the side, Connor remarked with an unrestrained laugh, "You know, this is exactly why I email everything!"