Okay yeah...It's been a hot minute. My apologies folks! :)

Picking up from the last chapter...I believe I have two pregnant saiyans and might have a third. It really depends...on what I plan to do with Cabba. EG

Knocked UP

Standard Disclaimers:

I don't own anyone in the DBZ saga, nor do I seek to gain profit from it.
I DO, however, seek to giggle my head off in glee as I put certain characters through the joys of...

*dramatic pause*


Before and After...

Part 6:
Dreams and Nightmares
That nightmare we all know as "Cravings!"

The early morning found an audience consisting of five looking down at a party of one gawking at the announcement from the royalty sitting before them. The party of one sat perfectly still, his jaw hung open and his mind unable to process the thought of it actually happening. It couldn't have been happening! It just couldn't!

"I...I...I've got to what?" he stammered through the shock. The stiff nature of his stance was slowly slackening into realization, his body falling and soon sinking down in the chair alongside his mind and any hope of this being nothing more than a bad dream. He wanted to blame it on that last drink he had poured himself, but even something as strong as what he had forced down wasn't enough to erase this nightmare.

Burdock—despite his feelings and the urge to do worse things than what he was doing—fought back a smirk. He leaned back against the cushions of the couch, his face neutral and composed as if this was nothing more than business. Vega, on the other hand, took no hold of such proper mannerisms. He fell to lean against Burdock's strong side, purring softly as Burdock's arm snaked its way around his waist. One slight tug had them close, Vega's head resting on Burdock's bare shoulder and a hand resting against his chest. He was all for closing his eyes then, but the compulsion to giggle was too much.

If it were at all possible, Cabba's eyes shrank even more.

"I believe I said..." Burdock explained yet again, "That you are to tend to the prince's every wish from now until I say you can leave. It's either that, or you can redeem yourself properly for insulting his house."

"And I don't think you want that," Goku mentioned lightly from where he was standing. Vegeta was standing near him, his hands resting protectively over the three month bulge that was doomed to get even bigger. His focus, however, wasn't on the fluttering children getting too comfortable on his bladder. It didn't take a genius to know that the nonchalant innocent look was nothing more than a farce in order to mask that calculating mind. Goku could only wonder at whatever his mate was thinking about. It wasn't going to be pretty, that much was certain.

Cabba swallowed the lump in his throat.

"So, from now on," Vega mentioned lazily, "You adhere to Burdock. As for me...I think I'll just lie here and enjoy my status."

Which meant that he still had just as much power but was no longer up for grabs. That much was made very clear with the symbols of Burdocks claim in plain sight. The simple ring of platinum and white gold twined against each other intimately around his finger fought to showcase the three five karat diamonds nestled into them. Vega, thoroughly loving his new position, smiled at it. It was just like Burdock to try and think of some other way to make him his own.

"La sono come l'amore di fairing?"


"Ed il bambino?"

Vega smiled again and leaned up to kiss his mate. "It's too soon to tell," he chuckled. "But I believe they will be strong."

Burdock smiled gently and lightly rubbed the marked arm resting against him. It was one of three marks, the others hidden in intimate areas only Burdock was privileged to see. "So set on having more than one," he laughed softly. He placed his lips on the smiling cheek. "Five or one, I'll be happy either way."


"I love you..."

"I love you, too..."


It was too much for the advisor. He lay sprawled out on the ground ashen faced and oblivious to the chortles coming from around the room. The three elites who hadn't said much of anything, relaxed immediately and plopped down wherever they could.

"Finally!" one of the elites cried aloud. "Jeez, I thought he would never pass out!"

"Tell me about it," the second muttered. "Damn it, he's persistent."

"More like unconscious, if you ask me," the third chortled. "Hope he didn't crack the back of his head."

"IF he did, may his sense of fashion have dwindled down to something tolerable!" Burdock snorted. "Pink uniforms...feh!"

"Okay! Now that he's out, can we have introductions?" Goku requested. He motioned to the three elites that haven't been known for anything other than the fact that they were...elites. It was a little weird having people in the house that slept over and you still didn't know their name in the morning. It might as well have been a one night stand!

The first elite was clearly the eldest of the bunch. It was hard to place an age on him, but he was fairly old with the gray mess of hair upon his head and trapped in the fur of his tail. A single eye was left to peer upon them. The other was scarred and left no trace of its former self. An eerie blind blue peered alongside the onyx, a sly smile coming to curl just beneath as he stood up. He wasn't complete muscle, but he had enough of it-alongside his many scars-to prove just why he was an elite.

"My name is Brock," he announced bowing slightly in his respects. His uniform became almost a second skin against him as he moved, crinkling and tightening with every slight movement. Despite this, the fabric did little to let them see what was really underneath the garment. Unlike the uniforms Frieza was infamous for making EVERYONE wear, this suit was fashioned much like earth's high ranking militia. The fabric was black in color, decorated only by the insignia of the house he belonged to written on the back of his shirt. There were a set of dog-tags that dangled from his neck and a couple of ranking pins sitting neatly on the side of his collar. It was anyone's guess just how high his status was, but they were pretty confident that it didn't much matter what that was. He abruptly lifted his head back and let out a mighty laugh aimed at Burdock sitting cozily on that couch.

"Burdock, you dog!" he laughed. "Not telling us about this little surprise!"

"Well, you know Vega," Burdock chuckled. "Don't ask, don't tell!"

That got a laugh out of Brock and the second elite. The third simply snorted but smiled anyhow.

The second stood up of his own volition, stretched his arms over his head and grunted working the kinks out of his back. He was much younger than the other two. His hair was surprisingly a golden hue, a rarity even if he was a super saiyan. There was no way to tell that though. He was happy enough to keep them in the dark, his attention on the laughter of his superior ringing throughout the room. He was wearing the same uniform, with a similar symbol dressed upon his backside. His was nowhere near as tight though, as he wasn't as muscular as his comrades.

That didn't mean he wasn't dangerous within his own rights. He had to have been in order to be within the Elite Guard for Vega. For now, his cheery demeanor came through as he waved toward Goku and Vegeta. "Don't mind Brock," he chuckled. "He and Burdock go way back."

"Is that so? So, who are you to say so?" Vegeta asked.

"Me? Oh, the name is Gin. This one here is my dear old uncle."

"Old I am, but never too old to whip your ass!" Brock exclaimed.

"Please, boys…let's not ruin my son's house…today anyhow," Burdock grinned. "It is a day of celebration after all."

Goku noticed the faint scar upon Gin's arms; a badge of sorts when it came to fighting like they did. It was rather ugly scar, but fit him somehow. So did his not so light punch into Brock's shoulder when he ruffled Gin's head. "Take it easy on this old soul!" Brock laughed. "I'm not as young as I used to be!"

"But you just said—oh, shut up!"

The third elite, used to their antics, laughed to himself. He reminded them a lot of a surfer type beach bum with his lax attitude, but his eyes gave it away of how sharp he truly was. His hair was tied back into a simple messy bundle of spikes. He rubbed the top of that black mess lightly, smiling a bit through the rugged goatee dressing his mouth and chin. Even his uniform was lax in nature, not quite fitting him but not falling off of him. It was an odd combination, even more so when he found a toothpick nearby and popped it into his mouth. The whole scene was off putting to someone who didn't stop to think about what was in front of them. He was lean and sculpted, but one couldn't tell that with the state of his dress and his whole air of nonchalance.

Goku found a type of kindred spirit in this one. He knew too well of the airs of idiocy and just where it could land someone.

"Oi, this silent one here is Baras," Gin said. "He doesn't speak much."

"I speak plenty," Baras corrected, "when the time calls for it."

"He certainly spoke when Cabba was talking about the change in uniform," Vega chuckled. "I don't know who was madder, him or Burdock."

Baras and Burdock snorted in reply. "My king, with all due respect I believe that was justified," Baras said. "Had Burdock not acted in such a fashion, I might have…and then we'd be one advisor short."

"We still might be," Burdock muttered.

"I didn't see a thing my lord…except the untimely misfortune of one lone advisor who happened to walk in front of someone's fist…if you catch my drift?"

Brock guffawed and laughed until he cried. Gin was no better, though he leaned on a smirking Baras for support. There was a story there that they weren't telling, one that the new King and his mate were highly amused by and didn't object to. Vega buried himself into Burdock's embrace, the mirth rippling off of him with every shake of his shoulders. One look at Cabba on the floor had them all in hysterics, and Goku pondering what the inside joke was.

"Mmm, I suppose I should…change that excuse a little since I've used it…twice?" Baras mused. "It's not my fault that he happened to walk into me with my fist out is all. Bad timing. Extremely bad."

Goku, a little stunned at the revelation, saw Baras in a light he'd seen before in one of his own. "I think we should introduce Gohan to him," he said, getting a full nod from his mate. Vegeta could see it as well and there was no denying it the longer he sat there and looked at Baras. There wasn't an inch of apology in his gaze, though he feigned like it was a complete accident. It reminded him more of his mate than anything, but the resemblance to Gohan was a little uncanny. "I think it might blow his mind a little."

"And who is this Gohan person you would inquire me to meet?" Baras asked.

Vegeta got up and started rummaging for the phone. He couldn't take it a second longer. "He's my eldest boy," Goku said, trying not to laugh too much as his mate started mumbling to himself. "I think you'd get along with one another…or fight until someone wins. Who knows? Either way, it's entertainment."

Vega knocked Burdock in his shoulder as the newly dubbed king laughed. "That is definitely YOUR boy."

Baras seemed to agree. He grinned lightly at the thought of what meeting this Gohan would be like. He had no doubt that it would not be boring. "I suppose I should assume that there is no objection to visitors, huh Cabba?"

Cabba, still unconscious, didn't object. Nor did he object to Vegeta marching over him to hand Goku the phone.

It was nearly dinner time when the doorbell rung. Goku looked up from his task at the stove. There was nothing left to be done other than to let the sauce thicken, which he did when he turned the stove off. He wasn't surprised to see the elites tense a little bit on his way to answer the door. During their little reprieve this afternoon while Cabba was unconscious, they traded stories, battles, and techniques by mouth. They wanted to do more, but Vegeta was having none of it. Goku, well aware of what a hormonal mate could do, hadn't argued. For that, Burdock had patted him on the back and took that lesson to heart.

His tales of fighting had struck a chord with Baras and Brock. They were well aware that he was indeed a strong saiyan by right, but hearing it and seeing it were two different things. They didn't question it aloud, but they were dying to see him in action. Gin was more curious about how he managed to gain those levels in such a short period of time. When Goku told him, Gin was already planning a take a small trip to the lookout…with Goku's company of course.

Either way, with their new King and Vega here and quite…occupied with one another, and hearing of Goku's enemies and how they popped up randomly, they readied themselves for anything that could come through those doors.

"Am I late?"

But there wasn't much that could prepare Baras for what he saw walking into their temporary housing. As such, he swallowed convulsively and tried not to bite his tongue.

"Right on time." Goku stepped to the side and let his son in, as well as his granddaughter when she hopped in after him. "We're having Spaghetti. Vegeta's been craving it."

"At least it's only that," Gohan said. "I'm afraid what it might be later on. I hope you like running."

"Oh…I don't think I have to worry about that much. By the way…we have guests."

Gohan was the first to pop in, dressed in his usual attire of slacks and dress shirt rolled up at the sleeves. His hair was a mess and he looked like he needed a stiff drink, or something to eat from the way his stomach rumbled. Pan was no better. Her stomach growled a little louder and got a laugh from Brock and Gin sitting at the table. Introductions were made, and all seemed peaceful…until Goku swung Gohan around and turned him towards Baras who had lost the ability to speak.

Baras was too focused on trying not to let his jaw unhinge itself. It would have been most unbecoming.

"And this," Goku said patting his son heavily on the back, "Is Baras. He doesn't speak much."

Gohan didn't seem to mind it much. He took Baras's slackened hands into his own and shook them. "I'm sure he'll have plenty to say after spending an evening here," he joked. "I hope your trip here wasn't uncomfortable."

That small short circuit to his brain resolved itself then and there as the trip down here to this planet replayed itself vividly. "Spending time with Cabba is enough to make anything uncomfortable," he muttered. Brock and Gin smothered their giggles. Burdock was quite open about his dislike for Cabba, but Baras was a close second. "Gah, if I had to watch the love sick fool throw himself at his imagination gone bonkers one more time, I would have shoved my very real foot up his very real and untouched ass…aw hell." He hadn't meant to say all that aloud. "Um…"

"Wow, whoever this Cabba is, you must really not like him!" Gohan laughed.

Baras relaxed a little, and willed his brain to function just a little longer. "He's…an acquired taste."

"I heard that you brute!" Cabba was on the scene faster than light through a window and blinding Pan with his hair even faster. "I'll have you know that I am no longer a virgin!"

"Fucking the pillows doesn't count," Brock snickered.

"Wow…his hair is pink…" Pan mused. "Like…really…really PINK. Is that shade natural?"

Gin smirked and shook his head. "Nah."

"Shut up!" Cabba snapped. "My hair is the latest fashion in space, unlike that blonde monstrosity atop that thick cumbersome skull!"

"More like the latest way to get a seizure." Pan rubbed her eyes and eventually wound up averting them all together. "Jeez…I may never look at bubble gum the right way again." How could anything that color exist without something trying to erase it? She didn't know and she certainly didn't want to figure it out, not that Cabba was going to tell her or that she would let him.

Rather, she had the chance to see her Grandfather in action with that simple grin on his face with his left eyebrow twitching a bit. "All right, now that we've all met, let's sit down and eat!" He grabbed the advisor by his shoulders, turned him around and shoved him out of the dining room. "Guys, you just sit there and talk. I'll get dinner on the table. Come on Cabba…I got a job for you."

Cabba tried in vain to turn himself around. That grip on his shoulders was too strong and a bit too painful for him to do so without bruising something. His mouth, on the other hand, worked perfectly. "Unhand me you—foul thing!" he cried. "Do you know who I am?"

"Yes…quite annoying." Goku shoved him a little more, letting go when he was tripping in the right direction. "Go get the others. When you come back, be prepared."

"And what do you mean by that?"

Cabba really shouldn't have asked him that. Then again, what Cabba didn't know would teach him to keep his mouth shut. Smiling stupidly, or what he assumed was stupid enough to keep Cabba thinking he was a simpleton, he walked off and dismissed the question with a, "You'll find out soon enough" motion of his hands.

The unknowing advisor dusted himself off, grumbling under his breath about uncouth barbarians ruining his perfectly pressed uniform. A proper saiyan would have smelt it long before getting to where he stood, and would have known better than to walk past the door that was halfway open. Since Cabba was too busy grumbling, he didn't use any of his senses. As such, he didn't notice where he was going until it was much too late, and there was little he could do to avert his eyes from the sight that greeted him.

One could only dream of having the king in such a position. It was a long unfulfilled dream of many, and few had gotten the pleasure to see it up close and hold it. Cabba was such a dreamer, although his dreams did not include Burdock lying back upon the pillows, his hands firmly gripping the moving hips of his new mate as he noisily climbed his way into a heated frenzy. It did not include watching as the former king muttered in their language to Burdock for him to "fuck him harder", nor did it include seeing the new king oblige.

Before his brain shorted out, he briefly realized a few things.

One: Burdock was HUGE.

Two: Burdock…was really THICK.

Three: Vega…wasn't dominant.

Four: Vega's ass was always what he dreamed it would be.

And Five: What did gum have to do with his hair?

His eyes rolled to the back of his skull the moment Vega let out a shuddering howl that left him a writhing mess on top of Burdock's pulsing cock. He hit the floor, again, and missed the triumphant look on Burdock's face seconds before Vega collapsed on top of him.

"I think he might be comatose…"

Pan was all for poking him with a stick. She had the perfect stick picked out too! Unfortunately her grandfather spoiled the fun and made her put the poker from the fireplace back in its holster. He did give her an umbrella, which wasn't as good but made do for the moment. She prodded that prone body again, giggling when he didn't move an inch.

"Hey, try poking him in the ass," Gin smirked. "He might wake up thinking he finally got some."

"Hey yeah!"

"Don't do it," Gohan warned. "At least…not while I'm in the room."

Gin and Pan pouted to themselves. Well, they pouted until Goku walked into the living room carrying a tray of snacks for them to chow down on. Dinner had been served, eaten, and praised. There was nothing left of it, and Goku considered that a good thing. He'd made enough for three armies. Vegeta had eaten a healthy dose of it, belching contentedly once his meal was gone. He'd sat back then, purring in total bliss as he rubbed the three month mound that was there to stay for another three months. Goku couldn't have been more pleased to know that his mate enjoyed it.

He stepped over Cabba, ignoring him for the moment. His comatose body had been dragged out here and left to slumber through dinner once Burdock decided that he didn't like having that pink head lying on his floor. They had yet to revive him, simply due to the fact that he was less annoying this way…and Burdock might have killed him. The tray was placed on the coffee table and left for everyone to indulge in.

Everyone accept Vegeta.

"Babe, I know you have that look on your face and I know what you want," Goku said. "But I'm out of strawberries. I'll have to go get some."

Vegeta shook his head. The strawberries and cottage cheese on rye wasn't going to cut it this time. "I don't want that," he said. "As much as I've enjoyed it…I really don't want that."

"No? Then…"

"I really don't know what I want…I want something sweet and sour…"

Pan innocently shoved a cookie in her mouth. "Sweet and sour? What, like pickles and ice-cream or some junk?" she mused.

"No, that's sweet and salty…" Vegeta corrected, "…but tempting. Oh, I know! Do we have any sour cream?"

"Sure," Goku said. "Plenty of it. Why?"

"I want that and rocky-road…oh, and I want those roasted almonds on top of it with some chili pepper."

Some people just have odd timing. Cabba was one of those people, snapping his eyes open and groaning softly to himself when his brain only clicked on halfway. Interestingly enough, he didn't leap up screaming about the outrage for something or other. Instead he tiredly looked to the left, then the right, and then lifted up a piece of his hair to his face. "Why is my hair pink?" he muttered. "And what am I doing…on the floor?"

"You," Goku said through the snickering of the others, "are on the floor because your brain doesn't function right. However, we're going to fix it."

"…we are?"

"Sure! All I need you to do is come with me."

He was yanking the pinked haired saiyan off of the floor and leading him into the depths of the kitchen in seconds. One of the benefits of being a fighter was getting to see certain things in action. Of those different incidents, this happened to be one of Goku's favorites. Burdock didn't have to inquire to know that Goku fully knew what he was doing. He had control of the situation, and surely when Cabba snapped out of it there would be no turning back for the annoying advisor.

He prayed silently that the noise level wouldn't reach ear splitting decimals.

"Is he alright?" Pan asked.

Burdock snorted despite Vega digging into his arm. "He's fine. He…tends to disconnect when he smacks his head…almost like a personality under a personality. I kind of like the broken one better."

"….excuse me?"

"It's simple my dear." Baras leaned back in his seat, full, comfortable, and no longer totally enraptured by the half saiyan sitting aside him. Well, almost. Who was going to know that but himself? And possibly the prince? "Cabba has a complex…when he smacks his head hard enough, he forgets about that idiotic self servant nature of his," he explained. "He reverts to someone who is completely confused, willing to go wherever, and possibly so laid back—holy shit, that's probably how he lost his virginity…"

"Not thinking about THAT," Gin said with a mighty shudder, "What he's saying is that when Cabba's head goes smack, the cooler Cabba comes back. Or the rude one. It depends really…"

"What, on how hard he smacked his head?"

"No, on how much trauma his brain took…and how hard he smacks his head," Brock chuckled. "It's quite amusing. It's part of the reason we hide it from people…"

Gohan wasn't being fooled by anyone. There was another reason behind it, one they weren't going to part with unless someone asked. So he did. He had nothing better to do. "What's the other reason?"

"He's unbelievably strong," Burdock groaned. He rubbed his face, annoyed, amused, and questioning why the little perks in life always had something fucked up behind them. Cabba was as fucked up as they came, and there was no clear answer as to why he just happened to be the way he was. Even so, that answer had his grandchild and his great-grandchild looking up at him incredulously. "I'm not kidding." He really wasn't. That was the not so funny part about it. "He is perhaps one of the stronger people in our court, only outranked by myself, and these three here. Vega wouldn't count because his power is unquestioned."

"Surely now the other courts would seek to question it, now that you are king," Baras stated.

"Only if they want to meet an early grave…and I'm not talking about what I'll do."

Brock grinned Vega's way; all of them were well aware of what would happen if such a thing occurred. It would be a royal blood bath. He couldn't wait for the first douche bag to try it.

"WHAT IN HEAVEN'S NAME ARE YOU MAKING? Is that…that even fit for consumption?"

"And that would be Cabba snapping back to his senses." Gin sighed, and shook his head morosely. "It's not fair I tell you."

They had the pleasure of sitting there listening to Cabba's horrified voice of protest. It was similarly like listening to a cat howl at the closed door in outrage. It wasn't a pleasant sound, but it was quite funny. Even the normally stoic face of Vega broke down into hysterics the moment that pale terrified face came walking back into the room numbly, the utter disgust of what was about to happen clear as day on his face. Cabba swallowed uneasily as Goku neatly handed the recently made concoction to his expecting mate, and neatly swallowed the bile rushing up into his esophagus when Vegeta took a bite of it and hummed in pure ecstasy.

"And just think," Goku chirped none too nicely, "You get to make these until his craving changes! I hope you were paying attention."

He was. He was also paying attention to the back of his eyelids again, and paying homage to the god who invented blackouts. He'd never been gladder to hit the floor and enjoy the darkness.

Vegeta pelted his comatose body with a cookie. "Weakling."

Ah...more soon. :) And not two years from now. LOL