Apprehension and Closure

In the end it wasn't Ulquiorra's decision. Aizen, outwardly showing worry that this parasite would wreak too much havoc on one of his favorite Espada, told Ulquiorra plainly that the parasite must be removed, no matter what. Being the dutiful and obedient soldier Ulquiorra did as was bade him. Grimmjow didn't like it one bit and didn't bother to hide it at all. He raged and killed and made nearly every other Espada avoid him if only for the peace it provided them. Even Nnoitra was getting sick of fighting with him which was saying a lot for the tall, lanky and bloodthirsty Espada. Szayel was ecstatic, a wide grin never leaving his face even during the daily meetings Aizen insisted upon.

It took a week to prepare for the surgery and in that time Ulquiorra was quieter than usual. He still spent his nights tangled in the sheets of his bed, moaning and writhing either beneath or above Grimmjow, but afterwards, if he hadn't already passed out, he would roll over and lose himself in silent contemplation. Part of him knew that he was trying to prepare himself for the end of whatever feelings and activities with Grimmjow. He felt, deep in his gut, that once that parasite was gone so too would his need be gone. Grimmjow didn't say anything to him about his shift in attitude however. Instead he was bent on taking his frustrations out on anyone and everyone who crossed his path.

Time seemed to come at a snails pace, minutes feeling like hours; days like months. Finally, on the morning of the surgery, Ulquiorra woke and dressed as normal, staring at himself in the bathroom mirror for a moment before returning to the bedroom. Grimmjow was still sleeping and he felt that that was best. He shifted his weight and frowned down at the sleeping Espada before bending at the waist to place a light and tentative kiss on his forehead, leaving the room. He didn't know what would happen after this and it confused him that he seemed to already be able to feel the loss of Grimmjow.

He walked with his hands loosely in his pockets, not eager nor trying to stall the inevitable. Szayel was waiting for him outside the doors to his laboratory, the same smile that had been in place for a week still stretching his full lips.

"Are you ready?" He asked, practically dancing in his anticipation.

"I am ready to do what has been asked of me by lord Aizen. It is unnerving putting my life in your hands. Please refrain from killing me on the table." Ulquiorra replied with a barely cocked brow.

Szayel's smile, if possible, grew. "I wouldn't dream of it." He said simply and led the smaller Espada into the laboratory.

Grimmjow didn't like the feeling in the pit of his stomach when he woke alone. It felt strange and solid, like he had swallowed something his body wouldn't allow him to digest. He had things to do, however, and rose to quickly dress and ready himself. He tried not to think about Ulquiorra throughout the day, tried to focus on his work, but it was useless. He and Ulquiorra hadn't spoken about what they were going to do after the surgery. He didn't know if he should move his things out of his room or if he should stay and just wait and see. The indecision pissed him off. He wasn't used to feeling this way; feeling so helpless.

Pacing the halls of Las Noches wasn't helping in the least. He needed something that would actually distract him. Something that would take him completely out of himself long enough to exhaust himself and hope that he slept dreamless. He was nearly halfway to pick a fight with Nnoitra, again, when he passed the control room to find Gin staring avidly at a screen. Grimmjow awkwardly stood at the door, frowning at the screen and trying to decipher what he was looking at.

"Been a long surgery." Gin commented in his lazy tone. "'Bout ready ta pull it out, ya know."

Grimmjow grimaced and took a few steps into the room to get a closer look. He wasn't sure why he was so hesitant and shook himself. Gin shifted back in his seat to give Grimmjow a better view, not turning his gaze away for a moment. Grimmjow leaned forward and squinted his eyes at the grainy image just in time to see Szayel, covered head to foot in a white medical gown with latex gloves up to his elbows, grab a pair of forceps and plunge them into the opened side of Ulquiorra's skull. He pulled back, a long, thin black object following the forceps out of the brain tissue. It seemed to get stuck for a moment and Szayel lifted his foot, placing it on the side of the operating table so that he could yank harder on the parasite. With one hard tug he pulled it free, almost falling gracelessly for his efforts.

"Hard ta believe that came outta someone's brain." Gin commented with a grin, his hands unfolding form their place deep inside the opposite sleeves.

Grimmjow grunted and stood up straight. It was over. The parasite was gone now and all he could do was wait and see what happened next. He left the room and Gin to return to his earlier task of trying his best at distraction. Surely Nnoitra would be up for one little fight.

It took three weeks to heal enough for Ulquiorra to be released from Szayel's surprisingly good care. There seemed to be no permanent damage to his brain and the parasite had been removed completely. All that was left was a test of his current skills to determine that he was still worthy of holding the title of Cuatro Espada. Aizen took one look at him and told him that he could keep his current title and his word was law. He felt strange walking the halls again, his footsteps light but still echoing a tapping sound as he moved. He was eager to get back to his room, but wasn't sure why. He felt as if he should know but for some inexplicable reason the harder he tried to think about it the more convoluted his thoughts became. The more convoluted they became the more his head hurt.

When he walked into the room Grimmjow was there, feet propped up on the arm of the couch and hands linked behind his head. He seemed to be lost in his own thoughts and started a bit when the door was opened, his eyes going wide when they landed on the smaller man. They seemed frozen for a moment, the air thick around them as they stared. Ulquiorra's brow puckered slightly before he stepped into the room and shut the door behind him.

"You're still here?" He asked, his tone indecipherable.

Grimmjow's eyes narrowed and his lips tightened. "Yeah. I am. What the hell're you gonna do about it?"

Instead of responding he walked to the bathroom and shut the door, leaning back against it and taking a deep but silent breath. He closed his eyes and took another breath, trying to steady his suddenly hammering heart. Just the sight of the teal haired Espada had him aching with need again and it had sent his mind reeling. Grimmjow stood up from the couch and stared at the door, wondering if that was a answer in regards to the situation. Was Ulquiorra really done with him? His chest hurt and his stomach rolled at the same time as a deep and burning anger began to rise in him.

Before he could do anything about it, like rip the bathroom door off it's hinges and grab the smaller man by the shoulders and shake him until he gave in, the door opened and Ulquiorra stepped out, one hand in his pocket and the other hanging limply at his side. He regarded Grimmjow with a passive look for a long moment, taking in the stiff stance and the impotent anger. He cocked his head to the side and opened his mouth to speak, Grimmjow's eyes automatically going to his lips.

"Do you plan on staying in my room?" He asked and watched Grimmjow's face contort further.

"I ain't goin' anywhere." He seethed.

"I see." Ulquiorra replied. "Then take your clothes off."

The slack jawed response was predicated, Grimmjow's eyebrows going high on his forehead and his mouth falling open at the command.


"Must I repeat myself?"

"But I thought… you…?"

Ulquiorra reached for the front of his tailed shirt and began to unzip it slowly. "Do you want me to kick you out?"

"You still wanna fuck?" Grimmjow asked, still in shock.

"I believe that is what I was implying, Grimmjow."

He pulled the fabric from his shoulders and let it fall to the floor before reaching for his hakama. They pooled at his feet without a sound and Grimmjow's eyes shot to his erect cock, his nostrils flaring at the sight.

"Is this you wantin' me?" He asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Either the parasite was not the only problem or I have… grown a liking to you. That being said, take your clothes off. We will know one way or another once I am inside you."

Grimmjow felt himself harden at those words but was torn between obeying the command and fighting back. However, after three weeks of worry, which he would never admit to, and wonder he found his fingers working to do Ulquiorra's bidding. He smirked as he worked the tie of his hakama open and let his pants drop, stepping out of them and kicking out of his sandals and tabi. He didn't even care that he was going to bottom. All that mattered was that he was going to get to fuck Ulquiorra at least one more time.

His movement was smooth, his stride strong, as he approached Grimmjow and reached up, firmly gripping the back of the other's head and pulling him down so that they were eye to eye. He stared for a moment, his large green orbs seeming to search for something. His eyes narrowed and without another thought in his head his stood up on his tip toes and smashed their mouths together, his teeth scraping and ripping the delicate skin of Grimmjow's lips. Blood poured freely from them and made Ulquiorra groan before pulling back to look heatedly back up at Grimmjow.

This need was different than before, not as strong and uncontrollable but no less intoxicating. He pulled back hard on Grimmjow's hair, his lips twitching when the larger man winced from the treatment but his eyes darkened with lust. Grimmjow's lip curled as blood dripped down his chin, further enflaming Ulquiorra.

With a twitch of his wrist Grimmjow was flung onto the bed and he followed him, straddling his thighs and placing a surprisingly hot hand to the center of his chest. Ulquiorra dropped his head and latched his teeth on Grimmjow's pectoral muscle, breaking the skin and moaning as more blood scented the air. Ulquiorra let his bloody lips trail down Grimmjow's chest, the crimson streak left behind glaring in contrast to his skin, to his hollow hole and let his bottom teeth scrape against the inside of the top of the hole. Grimmjow's body jerked and his hips bucked at the attention. He hadn't had sex since the night before Ulquiorra went in for surgery and even though he had pleasured himself it was far from the same.

His mind was so focused on the sensation of Ulquiorra's teeth and what they were doing to him that he didn't notice the hand that crept slowly up his side nor the fingers that began to twine around his hardened and darkened cock. The fingers didn't move but held a constant pressure in the middle of Grimmjow's cock and as Ulquiorra began to run his tongue along the circumference of his missing abdomen his breath began to hitch and his eyes rolled closed.

Ulquiorra shifted his weight and moved further down the body beneath him, abandoning Grimmjow's flesh for a moment to squeeze his hand tightly over the straining member in his grasp. Grimmjow grunted and rolled his head to the side, his eyes tightening and his legs spreading as Ulquiorra moved between them. Ulquiorra felt his lips stretch a little and lowered himself once again, his mouth hovering over the head and his fingers letting go so that only his breath caressed it. Grimmjow shuddered but didn't have time to enjoy the feeling. Instead Ulquiorra ran his tongue from base to tip, engulfing the swollen head in his mouth as soon as he reached the top. Grimmjow bucked and cried out, his head thrown back in abandon and his mouth open long after his voice had died.

Ulquiorra sucked deep, pulling back and curling his tongue against the underside of the tip before lowering once again. But he wanted something more. His skin was hot and his brain was fuzzy but it was different from before. Different than the near complete loss of control he felt when the need had taken him. He still wanted this, so badly that is was starting to hurt in places that he didn't like to hurt, but it wasn't the same.

As he lowered his head more, his tongue laving over Grimmjow's testicles, his hand crawled back up his chest and his fingernails dug lightly into the skin. He didn't break it this time, or rather wouldn't have had Grimmjow not arched his back and yelled out a forceful "Fuck!" when his tongue nudged his entrance. Fingers curled, skin broke and a lithe tongue poked it's way inside of Grimmjow. Again he wasn't long at it and reared back, his eyes dark with need as he looked down at the bloody and debauched body below him. His hands pulled back and reached for Grimmjow's knees, lifting and spreading them as he positioned himself, the head of his own cock brushing lightly against his soft skin and making him sigh.

Grimmjow reached for a bottle of lubricant and upended it over Ulquiorra's cock just before the smaller man began to press forward and hissed as he was stretched. Ulquiorra's eyes fluttered closed as he pushed in, stilling himself as soon as their hips were flush. Grimmjow opened his eyes in time to see Ulquiorra lick his reddened lips but closed them again when he began to move. Pulling his hips back Ulquiorra snapped them forward again and threw his head back, a loud and deep groan tearing from his throat.

"Fuck, Ulqui…." Grimmjow panted.

"Grimm." Ulquiorra moaned.

The pace was set, hard and fast, both man lost in a wave of sensation that only the other seemed capable of producing. When finally Ulquiorra's body stiffened and he came Grimmjow felt his own body tighten and release, both of them stuttering the other's name as bodies collapsed.

It could have been hours but was most likely minutes before either one of them moved again, Ulquiorra shifting and pulling his softened cock out of Grimmjow with a small grimace. He looked up at the larger man and sighed, his body barely functioning enough to crawl further up his body and curl into him. Grimmjow wrapped an arm around him sleepily and cleared his throat.

"So, I take it ya still wanna do this stuff?" He grinned, amusement and happiness clear in his voice.

"I don't see a reason to stop." Ulquiorra answered simply, not voicing the fact that he wasn't sure that now he could live without the teal haired Espada.

"Good." Grimmjow said as he began to drift off.

Ulquiorra sighed again and let a small smile tilt his lips and he snuggled closer into Grimmjow's body. He was, for the first time in his current existence, happy and only wished that things would remain so. He closed his eyes and let sleep take him, his body warm and tingling and the sound of Grimmjow purring snores lulling him to sleep.

A/N So first off I want to apologize for taking so long in finishing this. I got very distracted and kinda lost interest. Hopefully it doens't suck and you all won't hunt me down and do unpleasant things to me :D I hope you enjyed this and thank you for reading and reviewing!