---This story is greatly dedicated to Jeffery and Satan. And is loosely based on the shop I have on Gaia Online, The Tarot Cafe. It's so funny how overly nice people can completely disrupt a business.
I love Jeffery and Satan though, they keep me from becoming too serious. They always know how to make me laugh in the midst of everything. And I hope this makes them laugh as much as it does me. I can't remember the last thing that made me chuckle as I was writing it.
Thank you guys, for this. Enjoy. ---
Sprinkles on Coffee
By: Laria Kaiba
"DAMN YOU, PHARAOH!"
Seto Kaiba, CEO of Kaiba Corp., screamed loudly, slamming his fist hard against the table. Yes! Damn that blasted Pharaoh! Seto growled and clenched his teeth. This was horrible! How could he allow this to happen? Damn it! Damn that Pharaoh! Growling again, he remembered back to how this all started...
One week earlier...
It was a surprisingly boring party at Yugi Motou's house. Seto didn't know why he had been invited, much less, why he even bothered to show up.
The brunette sat on the couch with a glass of punch in his hand. He was watching the others play an incredibly stupid game of charades... I guess I'm using the term "watch" loosely, it was more like he was glaring in their general direction.
He wondered if it was possible to slit his wrist on the couch.
"Yo Kaiba!" Yami grinned, plopping down next to Seto, "You look like you're having fun."
"Oh yeah, I'm having the best time of my life," the CEO muttered sarcastically.
Yami laughed, almost obnoxiously, "Yeah, I know what you mean."
Seto merely glared at him, why did the Pharaoh always have to be so annoying?
"So you own that big company, right?" Yami asked.
"... Yes," Seto raised an eyebrow at him, "Why?"
Yami shifted, "Can I have a job?"
"PLEASE!" Yami exclaimed, throwing himself in front of Seto, groveling at his feet.
"Pharaoh..." he growled, before noticing that the room was very quiet and all eyes were on him. Seto looked down into Yami's large, pleading eyes, sighed, and folded, "Fine, Pharaoh, you can have a job."
Yami's face lit up, "Yay!"
"I've been looking for a new secretary anyways," Seto mused, "I'll expect to see you bright and early Monday morning."
"No problem, Kaiba!" Yami smiled, "And don't worry, you won't regret this at all!"
It was then that Seto realized that he was probably going to greatly regret this...
Yami bounced happily in his seat behind the desk.
"Wow, this is pretty nice," the Pharaoh beamed.
"Yeah," Seto grumbled, he stood with his arms folded over his chest, "Now all you've got to do is greet costumers, answer the phone, and try not to bother me too much."
"Doesn't seem too tough," Yami nodded.
"Good, now your first assignment is to get me coffee," Seto demanded, walking towards his office, "Black! and hot!"
The door closed with a snap.
Seto was just about to wonder where his coffee was when Yami appeared with a tray.
"Here you go, Mr. Kaiba," he placed the tray silently on the CEO's desk. Seto looked at the mug that sat on the tray curiously. It was bright yellow with little white flowers all over it, and he could tell that the contents of the mug definitely wasn't coffee. Seto slowly looked up at Yami.
"Pharaoh, what the hell is this?"
"Hot coco!" Yami... giggled.
Seto stared at him, was he serious?
"Oh!" Yami's sudden exclamation made the CEO jump, "I also have whipped cream and sprinkles!"
"I told you to get me coffee!" Seto yelled as Yami dressed the hot coco with whipped cream and rainbow sprinkles.
"But this has sprinkles!"
"I don't want sprinkles," Seto glared, "I wanted coffee! Black coffee!"
Yami ignored him and added more rainbow bits to the hot coco, "Sprinkles!"
Seto head collided with his desk, loudly.
"Get out!" he growled.
After the coffee incident from the day before Seto decided that he'd bring his own coffee today. The CEO let the former Pharaoh take care of the simple tasks of greeting and phone answering.
He seemed to be much better at that.
It was a quiet day for a Tuesday, and Seto was enjoying it. Yami hadn't disturbed him once since he arrived this morning, and as long as he kept this up the Pharaoh might end up being the best secretary he's ever had. Wait, who was he kidding, Yami couldn't be best at anything, other than being annoying, he was damn good at that.
Seto leaned back in his chair, looking over some reports, when suddenly a loud, happy pop song started blaring from outside his office. The CEO jumped, causing the loose papers in his hands to fly over the room. Seto glared as the papers rustled to the floor.
Storming over to his office door, Seto threw it open to find Yami standing up on his desk, playing air guitar.
"I'm walking on sunshine!" he sang, slightly off key, "And don't I feel good! Yeah!"
"Pharaoh!" Seto snapped, trying to get the spiky haired secretary's attention. When he wasn't heard over the blasting music, however, Seto screamed louder, "PHARAOH!"
Yami stopped and looked towards the CEO, "What?"
"TURN THAT RACKET OFF!"
"You want to play racket ball?" Yami asked over the music.
"TURN! THAT! RACKET!"
Yami pressed stop on the stereo.
"...Off," Seto finished, he glowered at the Pharaoh, "What the hell do you think you're doing out here?"
"I got bored, so I thought I'd listen to some tunes," Yami shrugged.
"This is a business, not a rave!" the CEO exclaimed.
"Sorry, Mr. Kaiba," Yami bowed his head.
Seto took a deep breath and returned to his office, slamming the door behind him.
A small knock came upon the office door.
"Yes?" Seto called without looking up, he knew who it was. Yami had been badgering him all day. Sure enough, the Pharaoh stuck his head in the doorway.
"I have a new memo for you."
"Just leave it on the desk," Seto waved, still not looking up. Yami nodded and dropped the memo on the desk. It fluttered into Seto's view and he stopped dead.
"Pharaoh..." he said slowly, "What the hell is this?"
"It's a memo," Yami blinked.
Seto held the memo up, pointing to the Kaiba Corp. logo at the top of the page. Instead of the solid grey 'KC' Seto was used to, the block letters were now a brightly colored rainbow.
"Oh!" Yami face lit up again, "Your new logo!"
"Yeah," Yami's grin widened, "The old logo was just too depressing, so I made you a new one!"
"Please tell me this is the only thing that it's on," Seto said.
Yami shook his head, "I changed all the letterheads to have the new logo on it!"
Seto's eye twitched, he could feel his blood boiling.
"Do you not like it?" Yami asked sadly.
"GET OUT OF MY OFFICE!"
The Pharaoh's eyes widened and he quickly scampered out of the office.
Yami sat at his desk with a solemn look while Seto paced back and forth before him. The CEO stopped and glanced towards the Pharaoh.
"I might have over reacted yesterday," he finally said.
"You threw a stapler at my head."
"... That may be," Seto started pacing again, "But you see, I've ran this company with an iron fist for years, and now you're running throwing flowers everywhere."
To emphasis his point, Seto pounded his fist down in front of Yami. Instead of being intimidated, however, the Pharaoh placed a flower in Seto's fist with a smile.
"No!" Seto roared, throwing the flower to the floor.
"But pretty." Yami said, getting up and giving the CEO a hug.
"Pretty doesn't run a business," Seto muttered, pushing Yami away.
"Yes it does," the Pharaoh said, "Flower shops."
"Kaiba Corp. is not a flower shop!"
Seto stormed back to his office before he threw another stapler, or something larger, at Yami.
And that brings us back to today. Seto was more then glad to see this day come. Just a few more hours until the weekend and he could go two whole days without having to deal with the Pharaoh. The CEO breathed a sigh of relief, after their little talk yesterday Yami seemed much better.
Currently, Seto was at a very important business meeting. All the major CEO's in Domino and the surrounding city's were here. This was not the time for one of Yami's outbursts.
But it was going to be.
The double doors on the far side of the boardroom banged open, and in skipped the Pharaoh with a wicker basket in hand. Seto have never prayed so hard for a heart attack in his life.
"Tra la la la!" Yami sang as he skipped around the long table, flinging rose petals all over the room. He was oblivious to the shocked looks on everyone's face, and the anger rising in Seto's eyes.
"DAMN YOU, PHARAOH!"
Seto finally exploded, slamming his fist against the table. Yami stopped and looked at him.
"I'm what?" Yami gasped.
"FIRED!" Seto seethed, "Now get out! I never want to see you in this building again!"
The Pharaoh's eyes widened slightly before he ran from the boardroom, sobbing. Seto's head met the hard table below him with a thud. The other CEO's blinked at him.
"Perhaps we should reschedule the meeting," one of them said after a moment of awkward silence.
"That would be awesome," Seto mumbled into the table.
The others nodded and left the CEO alone in the boardroom. Long minutes passed before Seto sat up with a sigh, "Good secretaries are so hard to find."
---*Sings* Carcasses on display!---