Drake: I updated again. yay
Sasori: Yes, maybe now we can get back to Halo.
Drake: Yeah, we will Sasori, I can assure you of that.
Sasori: So…what happened to Itachi?
Drake: He's spending time in the Mugen Tsukiyomi seeing his beloved little brother die over and over.
Sasori: …That IS evil…
Drake: Oh yes, I know, but he needs to learn that I am the author here.
Chapter 19: Called out…again!
"What's this about…?" Deidara asked as he and the other Akatsuki were seated in the living room, all present except for Konan who wouldn't be interrupted from watching the rest of Avatar.
Pain, who had been sitting at the front of the group, Opened his eyes and sighed. "It has been brought to my attention that we have slowed our track record on Halo 3 as of late…" when a few of them began to open their mouths to protest, he raised a hand for silence. "Tell me, aside from Kakuzu, Konan and myself, who else has played Halo these past few days?"
Everyone else was silent, before Itachi raised his hand slightly. "I played the double XP weekend." he stated boredly.
"Oh shit! I knew I forgot something, what was it? Hmm…" Deidara asked the Uchiha.
"Living Dead I believe."
"Fuck! I hate that play list…" Deidara slouched.
"If you're done," Pain said. Causing the two to straighten up again. "I would like to announce that that ends today gentlemen, as you know, a new play list called MLG FFA has been added to the ranks." he said.
"Oh shit! Let me in on that shit!" Deidara said with a grin.
"Hmm…" Itachi said, "Sounds….interesting."
"Finally!" Kisame grinned. Sharing a high five with Kakuzu, who gave his nod of approval for the news.
"I hope it's good…and not some low level play list." Sasori mumbled to himself.
Hidan frowned. "But I haven't beaten Resident Evil 5 on Pro yet…these fuckers don't want to play!" he growled, glaring at everyone he could.
"Hidan, you will play Halo and you will remove those ridiculous sunglasses before I smash your teeth in." Pain said boredly, but getting a small edge in his voice was enough to send a pair of sunglasses flying across the room.
"Now…" Pain said as he brought out a slip of paper. "As-"
"Why! Why does Michelle Rodriguez die in almost every film she is in!" Konan wailed from down the hall, making everyone briefly glance down that way before back to Pain.
"Ahem, yes, as you all know, with this new play list, we must reach our fifties in it as well, I assume this will no problem for any of you?" he asked.
"Not at all Leader-sama!(un)"
Pain nodded. "Off to it then." he said.
Every Akatsuki made their way back to their rooms to log in and play the new play list.
And so, they were back in saddle.
Kakuzu and Hidan's party
"Fucking whore! This is a map? There's about as much cover here as tissue!" The jashinist growled into the mic.
"Hidan, that made no sense, there's no tissue at all in Halo." Kakuzu mumbled as he continued his match.
"Kakuzu! Twelve already!"
"I'm on twenty-one."
"What! I'm not letting some greedy bastard outscore me!"
And so Hidan stepped into overdrive as Kakuzu chuckled.
Deidara and Sasori's party
"I realised why this place is called Smashed, only a drunkard could come up with this shit map. Un." Deidara growled as a grenade bounced around the corner. "FUCK YOU NADE SPAMMING NOOBS!"
Sasori sighed. "Deidara, please stop bitching, you're giving me a headache." Sasori muttered, his blond partner giving his head a serious verbal beating.
"I can't help it!" Deidara moaned. "This map hates me! To massive levels! Un."
Sasori inwardly groaned. "Deidara…" he growled.
"Sasori-danna! I can't help it! I swear-"
"STOP FUCKING EACH OTHER YOU FUCKING FAGS!" Hidan roared from the other room.
Deidara and Sasori were speechless for a moment. "Uh…did Hidan just think we were having sex?"
"With your bitching and moaning, I wouldn't be surprised."
"Fuck you!" Deidara spat, then an explosion rang out. "FUCK YOU TOO!"
Kisame and Itachi
"Kisame, How was the first match?" Itachi asked as he entered his fifth match, glancing around the area he moved further in.
"It was easy, most of these kids are just pretenders to the…holy shit!" there was an explosion. "Fuck…I thought MLG didn't allow rockets…"
"Some maps they have one." Itachi replied, jumping up and behind a player for the assassination, "Ninja…" Bitch he ended in his thoughts.
"Hey Itachi, remember that sweet overkill I got a week ago?"
Itachi smirked. "How could I forget? It was the only time you ever saved my life."
"Haha…" replied Kisame sarcastically. "I fired that rocket, hitting a hog for the triple, then the second and then hitting the camo guy behind you without even knowing it! That was awesome!"
Itachi nodded. "It was," he agreed, then frowned when a plasma stuck to him. "Hell…" he was blown up.
Pain and Konan.
"I am not stopping the movie! It's almost over!" Konan stated, glaring heatedly at the Rinnegan user.
"Konan, it's a new play list! We have to get our fifties in it!" Pain tried to reason with her.
"Hell to the no! We're finishing this beautiful movie! And I'll castrate you if you turn it off now!" she said as she saw Pain reach for the eject button.
"Don't Konan me Pain!"
Tobi and Zetsu
"I am relatively surprised this play list is actually amusing…" Zetsu said. "Like a first time lunch after a day of starving…yum."
Madara nodded. "Yes, that is true," he fired a burst into a usheilded enemy. "This is too easy for my Godliness." he muttered in disappointment.
Sasuke and Karin
"Oh God…" Sasuke growled, face palming for the sixth time that match. "Why are there grenades on this confined map? That's asking for a spamming!"
"Sperm, Sasuke-kun?" Karin asked, her eyes losing their dazed appearance slowly as she held Sasuke's arm.
Sasuke's eye twitched, "I said spam, Karin, SPAM, not sperm…and please, let go of my arm…I need to concentrate." he hissed at her as she clung to his arm. "Itachi! I think she's breaking out of the mindfuck you put her in! she's turning fan girl!"
"Fuck?…" Karin said.
"Itachi! Itachi? AGH!" Sasuke's screams died out
Hidan and Kakuzu
"Oh my God! who the fuck fucks while playing Halo? WHO?" He growled.
Kakuzu massaged his temples. "You probably would if you had a girlfriend." he mumbled in annoyance.
"Are you saying I can't get a girl!"
"What insane woman would want you? you'd be lucky to get a dead hooker, let alone a live one..."
"...Kakuzu, fuck you, just...fuck you."
"Did I hurt you nonexistant pride?"
"I'm going to kill you!"
"Try it!" And the Akatsuki began their long rise to fifty hood again.
Akatsuki VS Final Boss!
"Our opponent is Final Boss, I'm sure you know them?"
"Game over man! Game over!"
"Kisame, this is unsatisfactory!"
"WHERE IS MY HAIRGEL!"