Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans.
I don't know exactly what it is about him, but from day one he's been almost constantly on my mind. His thin, muscled frame, his jet black shock of hair, bla bla bla you know how hot he is I don't need to describe him. Everyone knows it. He could have anyone. I mean, look at even just on the team. Starfire and Raven. Who would pick anyone else when he could have one of them? Who would pick me over them?
It's not like I have super low self-esteem or anything. I'm just being realistic.
But every time he goes into obsessive mode, every time we all spend time together as a group, every time he and I are alone, I realize more and more that I love him.
I first realized it when he was Slade-ified; that I liked him in a way I wasn't exactly supposed to. I realized it because what I felt in my heart was exactly the expression that Starfire had on her face, and we all know how she feels about him. I covered it up with annoyance and anger, but inwardly the realization hit me with such force that Raven looked over at me and raised an eyebrow. She sensed it, and I'm pretty sure she sensed how I feel about him, too.
I loved Terra. I truly did. But not like this. I don't think I could ever love someone else like this.
And the day has come. Today I'm gonna tell him. Like for real.
I steeled myself, tucking the Beast far back so that an excess of emotion wouldn't trigger it. That's the last thing I needed to worry about. I waited until night, when even the insomniac Boy Wonder would be in his room, although probably not asleep.
I knocked on his door. There was a pause, then it slid open. "Beast Boy? What's wrong?" His voice was leader-y and authoritative, that distant and dismissive voice that he used mostly on me, I'd noticed.
"Nothing. I was just wondering if... uh... maybe we could talk?" My voice cracked on 'talk.' Great. Remind him of the fact that I'm a year younger than him. Fantastic timing, puberty.
He didn't seem to notice. "Can it wait? It's two in the morning."
"Not really. And it's not like you'd be using it to sleep like normal people anyway."
He sighed, but it was true so he allowed it. "Fine. Come in." He stepped aside and I entered his perfectly organized and orderly room. It was probably that way because he hardly used it.
"Okay. So I have a whole speech to say and I'm scared to say it so please just, like, sit there and don't interrupt me, okay?"
Robin nodded, sitting on the edge of his bed as I had requested.
I took a deep breath. "Okay. So. Here it is. My speech." I brought out a piece of paper, unfolding it nervously and trying not to shake. I took another deep breath. "To Robin. I really like you and I've liked you for a while now and I know this is creepy and out of nowhere but it's true and I'm sorry and I don't expect you to do anything or anything but I had to tell you because I just had to and I feel better now and I know you can't feel the same and I know you could pick from any girl you wanted and that's fine I don't expect you to like me but please don't hate me and I'm sorry." I stopped abruptly, having finished my, I thought, very well-written piece of oral literature. I braced myself and looked at the object of my desires.
His eyes were wide as saucers. Then he saw me looking at him and quickly controlled his face again. My heart thumped at this very Robin-like action. I turned around. "I'll go now. I'm sorry."
"Beast Boy. Wait."
I automatically obeyed him. You just don't disobey Robin, you can't. What he orders, happens. Simple as that. I've seen bad guys obey him.
"Why are you sorry?"
Every piece of my unstable DNA exploded with energy. I had to calm myself to say anything in response. "Because... well, I know you're straight. I thought I was too. And I know it's awkward. And because you're the leader, and because you already have thousands of fangirls all over you and you could pick anyone you wanted and-"
"I'm not," he interrupted me quietly.
"I'm not sorry. That you told me." He looked at me from where he was sitting on his bed.
"Maybe now you can help me figure out exactly how I've been feeling about you."
Now my eyes were saucers. "YOU? Dude!"
"I thought maybe I was just going crazy. But... well... I've, um, noticed you too..." his voice faded away, lost in his utter confusion.
I thought my eyes might bug out of their sockets. "Holy... crap." Only in my wildest dreams. Literally. The dreams where he said that usually took place in some freaky wild jungle or something. Shut up. Animals dream about jungles, okay?
And if I was unprepared for that...
He stood up, approaching me slowly, giving me time to change my mind. Like that would happen. Slowly, gently, he took my face in his hands and leaned down and kissed my lips.
It felt forced and out of character.
But no way was I gonna stop him.
I sighed softly as he pulled away, my eyes still shut. "Mmm..." I said quietly. "Yeah, I'm definitely crazy about you."
"Good," he said approvingly, as if I had just done something satisfactory on an obstacle course. Not that that happened a lot to me, either.
"So... um..." I started, but I was at a loss for how to continue. How could I express what I was feeling except... "Pick me."
He pulled me to him again, kissing me quickly, chastely.