Alternative scene Meadow (Chapter 27)

WARNING: THIS CHAPTER IS RATED M !!!!

Um, right. My first attempt to write a lemon. I hope I did well.

This is dedicated to rubell, who requested a lemon, but since there's been mentioned that they won't have their first time, I wasn't going to write it. But to be honest, this scene would have been different in the actual story if I weren't so insecure about this particular subject. I had this in my mind as a lemon. I decided to do it differently, but I think I should give you the original scene anyway. I didn't write it back then, but now I did, posting it under the outtakes. I know I said no lemons when I set up the rules for the Outtakes, but this is more of an alternative scene… and I allow it. I'm the writer, I decide! Haha. *evil laugh*

This is the scene from chapter 27, but continued differently than before. To catch up, I repeated the part where the fluff started to remind you of the scene.

Suddenly I understood everything; the secret the Cullens and Jake had been hiding from me, the things I tried to make myself understand but was never able to because I would never believe it.

Edward truly loved me. I truly loved him. We were supposed to be together; we both weren't ourselves if we weren't. We couldn't live without each other, just because we were so tied together, both emotionally and physically – god, if I had to live without the touch of my angel for one day I'd try to kill myself.

Everything made sense. The reasons why he followed me through Europe; why we ended up in the same place without knowing it from each other; how it could be easy for me to be around him even though he had hurt me so badly in the past. How I could see through that, see how our lives could be now, how they would be once we lived together; maybe we would get married and live like a married couple, I actually found myself being able to be happy about that.

Being married made me think of other things, and I knew I got a mischievous glint in my eye when I started crawling up Edward's body so I could kiss his lips.

When our lips touched, an electric current shot through me. Instead of ignoring it, I enjoyed the tingling feeling that spread through my body. I put more force behind the kiss, and for the first time in my life; I pushed his lips open to deepen the kiss.

Edward groaned when my tongue touched his, but he responded enthusiastically. Our tongues fought for dominance for a while, neither of us giving in. It was also exploring; we were never able to do this when I was still human, I was way too vulnerable to come near his sharp teeth, and he didn't have the strength to control himself. Now we were touching each other everywhere; exploring each others' body, trying to find out how we felt with each other. We fit together like a puzzle, every body part of me exactly matching his; making my epiphany more real.

The world around us seemed to disappear; all I could see, feel, hear and smell was Edward. His groans every now and then, the way his chest heaved with every breath, the way his hands were roaming over my body, all that mattered was him.

"Edward…" I let out a half-strangled moan, trying to tell him something but all the coherency had disappeared one his lips touched me.

"Yes?" Edward breathed in my ear, his lips still on my neck.

"We… need… to stop… out… of… control…" I gasped when he started sucking on a spot just below my ear.

Edward pulled away, smiling smugly at me. His eyes were sparkling with happiness, but I could also see they were darker than normal – he felt lust too.

"Out of control?" He asked, his voice husky and seductive.

If I had been able to blush, I certainly would have done that, but right now all I could do was look embarrassed.

"Yeah… If we continue, this'll get out of control. And we both want to wait till after marriage, right?"

Edward stiffened beneath me, and looked at me suspiciously.

"Who are you and what have you done with my Bella?"

"She's gone, remember? I am the new Bella, still yours, though," I added, smiling playfully.

"Hm, nice to hear that. And you are right, I want to wait but I can't help but being afraid that you'll run from me again. I want to share this with you, and if you run away, I'll regret not doing this," Edward answered thoughtfully.

"I see what you mean," I answered in a whisper. "Are you sure, though? Continuing this, I mean. I don't want to push either of us. I know I want to…" I looked away, biting my lip with my sharp teeth. It didn't hurt, but I had a hard time getting rid of that habit from my human time.

"Bella," Edward said lovingly, cupping my cheek with his hand. He turned my head around, making me look at him. Our eyes locked, and in those golden pools I could see the love for me that I missed before, but I could also see the desire, the lust and the fear in there. His eyes were lighter than before, but now I could also see that they would darken within seconds if I said the wrong – or the right – thing to him. And I enjoyed the fact that I had that control over him, just as he had it over me.

"Yes?" I whispered back, not sure where he was going.

"I want this, and I know you want it, too. But if you aren't sure about the moment, we can wait. I'd rather wait till marriage-" Edward started.

"I don't really care about marriage, I know we'll spend forever together anyway. A paper saying that we are bounded together till death do us part doesn't matter, we are mated. We already know that we'll spend the rest of our existence together. The marriage thing just… confirms it for the rest of the world," I said, interrupting whatever he wanted to say.

Edward frowned for a moment. "And this is not… A way of saying goodbye? Saving me regret of stopping now?" His tone was suspicious, and I felt terrible that the lack of trust could drive us apart.

I knew it was my own fault, pushing him away and running away from him, but it was also his fault for the things he had done in the past. We were both a bit suspicious about this, and we needed to clear this up.

"Edward, I am uncertain about many things, but there are a few things I am absolutely sure of. A few of them is you and your love for me, and me and my love for you. And the other thing I know for sure is that I am never going to leave you again, not that I am so sure of our love. I can't speak for you, of course…" I trailed off.

Edward took a deep breath, and it sounded relieved to me. "I am not going to leave you either. I know you're right… It's just… I don't know what it is. All I know is that I love you." He smiled his crooked smile, making my feel a bit dizzy.

"Good. So, why were we going to stop again?" Immediately his eyes darkened again, feeding my own lust.

I smiled, and leaned in to kiss him again. It was soft at first, just sucking on each others' lips lovingly, but soon he licked my lower lip, asking for entrance and I gave it to him immediately.

His hands, that were exploring before, followed a path over my body. He stroked the side of my arms, shoulders, and then he rested them in my neck. He pulled back then, his face still close to mine, making his breath surround me and making me dizzy.

His eyes scrutinized mine, and I knew he wanted to make sure I really wanted it. So I gave him a smile, nodded and leaned in again.

Our lips met in a heated kiss, our tongues fighting for dominance again. I was sure there was nothing more heavenly than the taste of Edward, and if I had known this kissing would have been like this, I would have pressed more, I would have fought for kissing like this. Instead, I always gave up, letting Edward have control over me. Back when I was human, that was necessary, but now I wasn't weak and fragile. When we were kissing moments ago I was happy with that, but now I was over the moon.

I had to say it, so I broke the kiss. "I am so happy I am not human anymore!" I panted.

Edward hummed in agreement, but didn't answer. Instead, he kissed me again, his hands moving over my body. His hands came to rest under my breasts, and I was about to tell him that it was okay to grope me, when he moved them up, and rubbed his thumb over my nipples.

I moaned at the sensation that that single movement gave me. He did it again, and moved his hands to the side of my breasts, massaging them softly through the material of my t-shirt. He was teasing me, and he knew it very well.

I decided I could do the same, and when I broke the kiss and locked eyes with my lover, I knew he knew it too.

I moved us, me now straddling him and I couldn't help but grin when I felt how aroused he was. I was the one who was doing this to him. And it wasn't as if he wasn't doing the same to me.

I kissed his cheek, moving my lips to his ear before biting his earlobe. I felt him purr beneath me, and locked that spot away for another time. I kissed the spot beneath his ear, down his neck to his collarbone. I looked at his face again, surprised at the colour of his eyes. They were almost black.

I smiled again, and proceeded my previous actions. I tugged at the hem of his shirt, and he helped me by lifting his torso off the ground so I could remove it.

I stared at his chest for a moment, the muscles mesmerizing me for a moment. I was positive I was going to start drooling if I looked at him any longer, so instead I started kissing every inch of his chest.

When I reached the waistband of Edward's pants, he apparently thought it was enough. He turned us around so fast that I couldn't even respond. He didn't look at me, instead he tore my shirt so my torso was exposed to him. I gasped as the cool air hit my body, and though I wasn't truly affected by the cold, I discovered that my body felt warmer than normal.

Edward stared at my lacy black bra for a moment, his eyes darkening beyond what I thought was possible. And I found out it was an incredible turn on to see him this way.

He then started to return the favour, kissing every inch of my chest, his hands caressing my arms and sides. He removed the bra then, and gasped softly. I suppressed the urge to cover myself.

It was still my first time, and I couldn't help but feel embarrassed as Edward stared at my exposed flesh. I knew I did the same, but I knew he couldn't feel as embarrassed as I did. He had nothing to be ashamed of. Even though I knew that the venom that changed me also perfected my body, I couldn't help but think I wasn't good enough for Edward.

Apparently, he thought differently.

"Beautiful," he murmured. He leaned in, and kissed my peaks.

We proceeded that way, slowly undressing each other, kissing the exposed body parts, until Edward was in his boxers and me in my matching panties.

Right at that moment the sun broke through the clouds, and for the first time I saw Edward's whole body sparkling in the sun. I gasped at the beauty of it, never expecting to see this.

Edward stared at me the same way, and I looked at myself as well. I saw that I was sparkling just like Edward, and he was just as dazzled by me as I was by him. When our eyes locked, he smiled, and kissed me lovingly.

"Beautiful. Perfect." He whispered again, and I smiled a bit.

We knew it was time for the last step, but since we were both so inexperienced, it was a bit awkward. As we removed each other's last part of clothing, the air around us changed, it became charged with electricity. It made me shiver in anticipation.

We locked eyes first, and then actually looked at each other's naked body. I felt embarrassed that I was so inexperienced, I had no idea how to proceed and clearly Edward felt the same. I let out a nervous laugh, making him chuckle.

"Are you ready, love?" He asked then. I nodded, knowing I was more than ready for this. I just had to remind myself he was every bit of a virgin as I was, and therefore just as inexperienced. I shouldn't panic, there was no reason for it.

As he slowly slid into me, I did feel afraid for a moment. Afraid that it was going to hurt, afraid that he wouldn't fit. From what I had seen, he was pretty big and even though I had no material to compare him with, I knew he was bigger than the average man.

Edward felt me tense, and stopped immediately. He leaned in and kissed me softly on the lips.

"Relax, love. It'll be alright, I won't hurt you." I could see the love in his eyes, and I smiled.

No. He would never hurt me.

After that, I made myself relax again. He started moving again, and soon we were joined together. As he started moving, I felt things I never imagined to feel. My body became alive, a fire spreading through it, though a good one.

The meadow disappeared, only the warmth of our bodies remained. The sound of our breathing blocked out everything else, and if someone had been watching us I wouldn't have noticed it. I finally felt what it was like to be connected to someone in the most intimate way, I finally understood why Emmett and Rosalie were going at it like bunnies. The feeling of this connection was indescribable.

As we slowly reached our climaxes, I never felt more loved. I never felt more wanted and I never felt more beautiful. I could see it all in Edward's eyes while he was moving above me.

When the knot in my stomach began to become so tight that I was afraid I was going to burst, Edward bit my neck and I came undone. Edward followed a few thrusts later, and I wondered how he had controlled himself, letting me cum first. I knew I wouldn't have been able to do it.

Edward collapsed on top of me, his body flush against mine. I knew he couldn't be tired, but I enjoyed the feeling anyway. This feeling was so great, I never wanted to let it go. But I knew we had to.

All too soon he pulled away, but he didn't let go of me. Instead, he turned us around and rested me partially on top of him.

We were both speechless, but when we finally looked at each other after a few minutes, I knew no words needed to be said. We had just shared the most amazing experience, there was no need to put it into words. The connection we had said it all.

And when he smiled, the love shining in his now golden eyes, I knew I never wanted to let go again.

--

Pffffft…. So… how did I do? I am quite nervous posting this, it's the first time I wrote something even close to smut, the fluff at the beginning of this chapter actually the closest thing.

Next will be another request. I will warn you that I won't follow the storyline, just write the thing I have inspiration for. Which will be a surprise to all of us, even to me.

Did you enjoy this? Did I do a good job? Which ending of the chapter was better in the end; this one or the one of the original story?