Disclaimer: Not mine, alas.

Author's Notes: Written in response to Porn Battle VIII's prompt 'boredom'. Kirk/Gaila/McCoy

Bored with Not Having Sex

"Do you mind?" McCoy growled over the top of his data PADD, eyes carefully facing front.

"Not at all," Gaila giggled, writhing on top of his half-naked room mate. Because he could hear her writhing. The slide of skin-on-skin was somehow amplified, when said skin was green and all you ever did was have sex. He would have scowled at the pair of them, but that would have meant looking.

"We could go to your room?" Jim, at least, had some kind of modesty.

"Uhura's away for the weekend."

"Great!" McCoy said too loudly, not looking even at the rasp of tongue-on-flesh, because he really really honestly didn't want to know whose flesh. Or where.

"Ah. No fun, then," Jim said, with that shit eating grin on his face.

McCoy knew it was his shit eating grin because he had succumbed. He couldn't resist glaring at the two over-sexed kids any longer and, oh brother, was that ever a mistake. Somewhere along the line, Gaila had lost her uniform. The scraps of lace that apparently passed for underwear with girls these days, barely covered full, green breasts; didn't cover any of her sweet ass. And that was definitely pheromones, because nothing else would make him think of Jim's irritating fuck-buddy's ass as 'sweet'. Damned Orions.

Slowly, with a tilt calculated to send red hair scattering over Jim's bare chest (and, nope, he wasn't attracted to that either – not one little bit), Gaila turned to look him up and down. "Didn't you get divorced, like, a year ago?"

"Mmm," McCoy grunted. He was going to turn back to his studying. That was precisely what he was going to do. Any second now.

Gaila turned between Jim's legs, lying back against his chest with her head on his shoulder. McCoy saw his friend's tanned hand cup her breast, saw him tease out the nipple with his thumb. Gaila smiled her appreciation, still looking directly at McCoy as her body purposely pressed back against her lover. "Aren't you bored with not having sex yet?"

Bored wasn't precisely the word McCoy would have used. Irritated. Frustrated. Pissed off. All good, solid words to express his general reaction to waking up with an erection that nobody would be handling but him for the foreseeable future.

However, McCoy was a man of pride, and he declined to answer. But he didn't stop watching. Especially once Jim's hand was on her thigh and spreading her legs with a silent promise of pleasure.

"Because we don't mind if you want to join us," McCoy was astounded to hear Jim's voice. That girl's pheromones must be strong.

He stammered for a moment. Starfleet had sent him on a lot of courses where they simulated awkward situations that doctors often had to handle. Being propositioned by your best friend – particularly in quite so blunt a manner – had never been one of them. But he was seriously considering requesting it be added to the syllabus.

"C'mon, Bones. She's hot, she's wet, you might as well."

McCoy spent at least a second considering how hard his ex-wife would have hit him if he'd said anything approaching that level of vulgarity about her. But then, that was the attractive part of this deal. Gaila liked that these guys were discussing her like this. She was chewing on her lip and sliding against his friend and, shit, just the look in those eyes was enough to make Bones want to bury himself in her balls deep.

"I want it understood that I am an unwilling third party in this whole operation," McCoy growled, as he shifted onto Jim's bed, slipping with practiced ease between Gaila's legs.

She ran a hand over the hard bulge in the front of his slacks. "Unwilling. Sure, OK."