I whistled, whistled, whistled as I turned on my 360. Julia and I were going to trade off playing Assassin's Creed.
Ah, Assassin's Creed. Only the most awesome game ever! My other cousin, Alicia, was a fangirl of Altaïr, but Julia and I just thought he was pretty damn cool.
"Shut up, Church."
"Screw you, Caboose."
Yes, we were Red vs. Blue fans as well. I was Church, she was Caboose.
"Flip a coin for who goes first." Julia held up her quarter. "Call it in the air."
She threw it up in the air. "Heads." I said.
It landed. Tails. Ah well, I'd get my chance.
Before we really get going with this tale, let's get some imaginations, erm, imagining. I was five foot three and a half inches tall, my cousin, Julia, was five foot five. I was 17, she was 13. Alicia was 14, five foot two, and overweight, but we were working on that. She was losing weight, however, thanks to me pressuring her to not eat every time she was upset.
"Don't eat your feelings," I'd said. "Bury them in a punching bag. Or a mat. Or even a pillow."
Julia's brother, David- but everyone called him Davey- was five foot six, and skinnier than hell. He was 14 as well.
Julia and I were currently at my house. Alicia was coming over later, and Davey would be here once he got out of summer school for the weekend.
Anyway, Julia was playing, me giving her the occasional pointer when she got confused or whenever I knew a better way to do something. We did that for each other- it'd helped us become better gamers. Her record was halfway through the story without dying, and mine was memory block four, after the first or second assassination.
Then the damn Xbox Red-Ring-of-Death'ed on us. Julia was pissed- so she hit it. Not hard enough to break, but enough to show it she was mad. I calmed her down, turning us away from the TV. There was a strange whooshing noise, and a bright light exploded behind us. I turned, very, very confused.
The hell? Was that Altaïr standing in my gameroom?
There's an Assassin in my gameroom! Holy shit!
"Julia?" I said.
"Yeah?" She sounded dazed.
"This is all a strange dream, right?"
"I don't know." She pinched me.
"OW! Son of a bitch, Caboose!"
She laughed, Altaïr turned around. "Where am I?"
Then he blacked out.
I ran over to him and took his pulse.
"Okay, he's alright. He's probably going to have a headache, though- let's get him on the couch." I said.
Julia nodded, and together, coupled with an awful lot of cursing, we pulled Altaïr's unconscious body up onto the couch.
"Christ, Julia, how hard did you hit that thing?" The Xbox was back to glowing green now, right were Julia had paused it. Altaïr was still in the game- but he was here as well? This was way too confusing.
"I didn't hit it that hard…"
"Dude, still- we have Altaïr Ibn-La'Ahad in my gameroom!"
"I wonder what your mother would say."
"I don't think she would believe me."
"If we show her-"
"She'll call the cops, man! And the FBI will like, dissect him or something."
"Okay, we'll just have to work with it."
"Somehow." I said as Altaïr opened his eyes. He saw us and ejected his hidden blade.
"Dude, relax. Chill. We're not gonna hurt you, and we're not Templars." I said.
His hidden blade was still out but he untensed slightly.
"Who are you two?" he asked.
"I'm Megan. That's Julia." I said, pointing to each of us in turn.
"Where am I?"
"Rosharon. You're in Texas." Julia said.
"What's a Texas?"
"It's a place. Rosharon is a town."
"How-How did I get here?"
"I have no idea." I said as he sat up, retracting his hidden blade. He looked at us then caught sight of the box to my Assassin's Creed game.
"Why am I on this?" He picked up the box and looked at it.
"That's the case to a video game."
"What's a video game?"
Julia and I slowly broke down the world to him, and when we were finished he looked at us like we'd lost it.
"So you're saying that I am part of a virtual reality that you can access through those boxes?" He pointed to the TV and Xbox.
"In a nutshell." I replied.
He nodded, still looking horribly confused. "Okay, I think I'm starting to understand…"
"Oh no- Alicia! We've got to hide him!" Julia said to me.
"We don't have anywhere to hide him!"
"Quick- get him behind the back of the couch!"
I pointed and Altaïr hid behind the couch he had been laying on. Alicia walked into the gameroom.
I put on my best everything-is-normal expression and voice. "Hey, Alicia."
"Sup?" Julia said.
"The ceiling." Alicia replied.
"Har-har." I remarked dryly. Alicia went and sat on the couch. I prayed that she wouldn't look behind it.
"So, what were you two playing on the Xbox?"
"Oh, just some Assassin's Creed." Julia replied.
"AH-CHOO!" a sneeze came from behind the couch.
I facepalmed. Julia grimaced.
"Ye-es?" We replied as innocently as possible.
"Cut the bullshit. Who's behind the couch?"
I facepalmed again. "Stand up, Altaïr. Could you have picked a worse time to sneeze?"
He stood up from behind the couch. It was a good thing Alicia was sitting on the couch because she looked at me, looked at Julia, looked at Altaïr- then fainted.
Altaïr poked her. "Will she be alright?"
"She'll be fine." I walked over to the freezer, pulled out an ice cube, and set it on Alicia's neck.
Alicia snapped into alertness. "I'm-okay-what-happened?"
"You kinda blacked." Julia said while sitting down in the blue mushroom chair.
Alicia blinked. "Oh."
"Anyway, Altaïr, this is Alicia- Altaïr?"
Altaïr had taken this opportunity while I was distracted with Alicia to try and slip downstairs. My mom was at the computer in her workroom, and the next thing I knew I heard screaming.
I ran downstairs and grabbed Altaïr.
"What the hell, Altaïr!" I yelled and pulled him out of the workroom. I pushed him to Julia and went back in to calm my mother down, then typed in "Altaïr Ibn-La'Ahad" into her Google search bar and told her to read up on him. Once my mom caught her breath, I led Altaïr back in.
"Altaïr, this is my mom, Mom, this is Altaïr."
Altaïr blinked- he was very confused. I pushed Altaïr back out the door. Julia led him back upstairs.
"Read the webpage, Mom. It'll help. I'll explain things later." I walked back upstairs and Altaïr looked at me.
I looked at him. "Is now really the time?"
He shrugged. I shook my head, then walked downstairs and opened up the pantry. I grabbed a bag of Sun Chips and walked back upstairs before opening them and setting them in his lap.
"What are these?"
"Sun Chips. They're good. Just take one and put it in your mouth. But don't eat the whole bag." I said while turning back to watch Julia and give her pointers. Altaïr cautiously picked up a chip and put it in his mouth.
Soon I heard him munching and turned back to giving Julia pointers. Then Julia had a leap of faith gone wrong and died.
"That is not how one does a leap of faith." Altaïr said.
"Well if you think you're so good, you try it." Julia made him an account- she named it "Badass Assassin"- started the game over, and handed him the controller.
It took Altaïr a few moments to figure out how to work it and even then he had issues getting past the first memory. Altaïr hit the console this time, during a Desmond cutscene.
"No!" Julia and I yelled at the same time as another flash enveloped the room…