What The Shell…?

Disclaimer: I don't own TMNT, nor do I have anything against soap operas. No flames, please!

It all began with a bet. Leonardo and Raphael had bet Donatello that he couldn't watch one episode of any show that was un-educational or did not require a brain to follow. Donatello won, much to the dismay of his older brothers.

Michelangelo, or Mikey, had refused to take any part in the bet, claiming that he was going topside to get Klunk some food. That wasn't unusual, Mikey doted on that cat. The unusual part was that he usually joined in on their bet, but this time, he hadn't. Then again, Mikey was unpredictable.

Anyway, going back to the central problem at hand, Donatello… Don, won the bet. Leo and Raph lost. Subsequently, they had to face the loser's consequence; they had to watch five hours of soap operas. The two brothers in question were greatly chagrinned by this situation, but Leo, ever the honorable one, resolved to accept his fate, and persuaded Raph to do the same.

Don could not resist missing his brothers' discomfort as they sat through the show, so he went along. Master Splinter joined them, as he had a bit of a soap opera fetish. Mikey, however, was free; he had had nothing got do with the bet, so he was not obligated to attend, nor did he have any hidden interest in soap operas. The odd part was that he normally would not have been able to resist the spectacle that was sure to occur, yet the youngest turtle seemed to be waiting for them to leave with a touch of anxiety.

The others were going to April's to view the show, as Leo and Raph had no desire for Mikey to see what they were watching; they'd never hear the end of it. Mikey ushered them out with a slightly casual, somewhat anxious air.

Leonardo turned to Master Splinter and asked worriedly, "Shouldn't someone stay with him and keep him out of trouble? Mikey does tend to be accident prone at times. He might blow up the lair."

Master Splinter replied, "No, I do not believe that Michelangelo would cause our home to explode, nor do I believe that he is as accident prone as you and your brothers seem to think he is. Michelangelo will be fine on his own. It is only five hours."

Raphael broke in pointing out, "Yeah, but this is Mikey we're talking about here!"

Donatello muttered something like, "… better not be in my lab…"

Master Splinter smiled and in answer to his sons' worries, said, "Michelangelo will be fine. You must have faith in him." That said, they all continued on to April's where the two older turtles sat through five hours of a truly terrible soap opera.


When the three turtles and their sensei returned home, the lair was still (miraculously) intact. The two older turtles were much humbled, and to see that they were wrong in their guess that their youngest brother had not blown up their home added one more thing they were wrong about. The door was still locked. Donatello was grinning triumphantly, and he was glad that his little brother had not, by all appearances, caused any damage to the outside of the lair. But what of the inside? Master Splinter was satisfied; his sons had been humbled, Michelangelo had not destroyed the lair, and he had had his fill of soap operas for awhile. They entered their home.

They had taken the back door, as it was closer, so they did not see anything unusual. The lair was intact, inside and out. But where was Mikey? They entered the living room, and got the shock of their lives!


Mikey and an unknown, female mutant turtle were in the process of making out on the couch, and it was obvious that something even bigger was going to happen if they weren't stopped.

The rat and the other three turtles exchanged shocked and horrified looks, and then caught the youngest turtle's attention, as he seemed to be a little… busy at the moment.

Leonardo gasped, his voice shocked and somewhat appalled, "Mikey…?"

Raphael shouted, "WHAT THE SHELL ARE YOU DOING?!"

Don groaned and mumbled, "There's a sight that I didn't need to see. My little brother and his apparent girlfriend are making out on the couch… no big… I didn't see that, I didn't see that…"

Master Splinter, his voice commanding, inquired, "Michelangelo, what is the meaning of this?"

Mikey had ended his make-out session, and now he was glancing apologetically all around, first at his girlfriend and then at each member of his family.

"Uh, sorry, guys," he said. "Sorry, dad. This wasn't how I was going to do this…"

The girl turtle asked, her voice sweet and adoring as she gazed at Mikey, "Mikey, is this the famous family you were telling me about?"

"Yes, Anna. This is my family. Those are my brothers, and this is my father. I'm sorry, love, I didn't mean to introduce you to them in such a fashion."

She replied, "It is quite all right, I assure you. I've been longing to meet them for quite a long time."

Raph interrupted, "Wait a minute… you've been hogging the girl? No wonder you were so anxious to get us out of here!"

"Anna, you were supposed to be home an hour ago," came a complaining female voice from a small pager.

The new turtle, now known as Anna, replied, "It's all right, Irina. Mikey and I just lost track of time. I'll be on my way in a minute."

Mikey asked, uncomfortably, "Did I mention that Anna has three sisters? Their names are Irina, Olga, and Isadora."

Raph answered, "No, you didn't."

Mikey stood and took Anna's hand, smiling at her. It was not his usual goofy grin, or his sheepish grin, or any of his usual facial expressions. This was a gentle, loving, adoring smile, characteristic of a man who had fallen deeply in love. It was heart warming. "Anna," he said, "I would like you to meet my father, first of all. This is Master Splinter; he taught us everything we know." He led Anna to Master Splinter, introducing him to her.

Master Splinter, seeing the look on his youngest son's face, and the equal one on his companion's, responded, "It is a pleasure to meet you, Anna."

Anna replied, "The pleasure is mine."

Mikey introduced her to Raphael next, saying, "This is Raphael, we call him Raph. He's sometimes a little hotheaded, but we all love him anyway."

Anna responded to this introduction, in her gentle way, "It is a pleasure to meet you, Raphael."

Raphael mumbled, somewhat stupidly, but politely nonetheless, " It's good to meet you, too, Anna. Call me Raph."

"This is Leonardo. We call him Leo. He's sort of the leader. He's the most focused. Raph is the fighter, Leo is the stealth."

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Leonardo."

"The pleasure is ours," responded Leonardo.

Lastly, Anna was introduced to Donatello. Mikey said, "This is Donatello, but we call him Don or Donnie. He's the brains, the doctor, the utilities, and the techno-whiz. We're lucky to have him."

Anna replied, her pleasant smile still on her face, "It is a pleasure to meet you, Donatello."

Donatello responded, "Call me Don. The pleasure is, as Leo said, ours. You've been good for our brother."

"As he has been good for me." Turning to Mikey, she added, "I now know your family, and they know me, but they do not know my family. It does not seem right."

Mikey replied, "I guess we'll have to make more introductions, then. How shall we handle this?"

"I'll call them and tell them to come here."

"But they're all the way in Queens!"

"We've been exploring the sewers lately. We found a shortcut."

"Oh. That makes things easier. Go ahead and call them."

"Of course." Anna pressed a button on her pager, and when someone answered, she spoke quickly. "Isadora, tell Irina and Olga that you all need to be down in Manhattan quickly. Use the shortcut."

The female called Isadora replied, "Okay. We'll be there soon."

"See you then." Anna turned to Mikey and said, "They'll be here."


True to Anna's word, her three sisters came, and they were introduced to Mikey and his family. Each of them took to one of Mikey's available brothers.

Isadora, the intelligent and gentle one, took immediately to Donnie, and the two became fast friends over a conversation about magnetic fields.

Olga, the fiery, feisty one, soon became a great friend to Raph, as they had a great deal in common and both agreed that the fight felt good.

Irina, the leader of the girl clan, the silent protector, found a great deal of happiness with Leo as they compared notes over how tough being the leader could be.

As for Anna, she was sweet and gentle, but she also had a prankster side, and she could be quite the mischief maker, thus making her Mikey's soul mate. Mikey explained how they'd met over a pizza.

"I was exploring the sewer, you know, looking for something to do, and I guess I went further than I should have, because I ran into this really beautiful lady," he took Anna's hand, smiling at her, and continued, "She was apparently out for the same reason I was. We were bored because our brothers… or sisters, were all doing something else. I was shocked to find out I'd gone so far that I ended up in Queens. We got to talking, and realized that we had a lot in common. We both got mutated by some type of ooze, and we were about the same age, and we had three older siblings. We started meeting, and when you guys left today, I thought it was the perfect opportunity to show her where I lived. Then, we became, uh… distracted."

"Distracted by hormones, no doubt," muttered Raph under his breath.

Mikey continued, "I'd meant to introduce her to you guys at some point, but I had no idea when, or how. I didn't mean for you to find out the way you did."

"I should hope not," mumbled Don.

Irina, touching Leo's arm, asked, "How did that happen, anyway? Anna told us to come here, but she didn't say how your family found out."

Anna, with a faint blush, replied, "Well… Mikey and I were in the middle of something, and…"

Olga broke in, "They walked in on you two making out on the sofa. Raph told me. 'Nuff said."

Irina gave Anna a shocked look, but said nothing. They would talk about it later. Besides, she was having fun with Leo…

Olga found the whole thing somewhat funny. Sure, it would be a nasty shock, but the idea was a little funny. She glanced at Raph. He was hot, drop-dead sexy, even.

Isadora was like Don. She was a little grossed out. When you thought about it, sex was rather barbaric, and making out could lead to that. And for someone to be doing it in what could be considered more or less a public area, was rather disgusting. Don… he was so smart, and he understood how it felt being the brainy one… he was kind too.

Master Splinter was still slightly shocked by the sight of his youngest son and his apparent girlfriend engaging in a rather hazardous and slightly disgusting activity on the sofa… in the middle of the living room. But he was happy for his sons. They had now found love with someone of their kind, and hopefully, they would be happy. That was what mattered. Still it had been a shock, and in the words of Raphael, the thought that had crossed his mind was, "What the shell…?"