A/N- Happy early birthday, Tina. I have to post this now because I'm not sure if I'll be here Wednesday, to actually post on your birthday. Feel free to tell me if you hate it, although, I love it. You always get the best stories out of me because they deal with Jericho. Lucky bitch!
I can't believe him! It should be illegal for this man to speak. He should be locked up in a room where he can't communicate with the outside world. I regret the day I ever got myself into this complication. Actually, I don't regret taking this job, I regret getting him as my...boss, basically. Except in his eyes, I wasn't a worker, an employee. No, that would mean I get respect.
I am a slave to him.
I was hired to book him hotels, keep track of his signings, make sure he has a flight out to the next city. You know, the usual things personal assistants did.
I am NOT supposed to be in Wal-Mart buying him underwear. I made this very clear to him. Yet here I am....
"Tina. Go, now! I need new underwear."
"You can go buy your own."
"It's your job, go. I want three pairs of silk boxers, preferably blue, and five pairs of cotton boxers, black or red. Now go."
That was how I ended up here, in Wal-Mart, eleven o'clock at night. He is so demanding, and I never get a thank you. I'm lucky if I get four hours of sleep at night. The shows are usually never over until after eleven, and by the time we get back to the hotel and get settled, it's way past twelve. The kicker? He makes me get up at five in the morning to get him coffee! I then have to put in the refrigerator and he reheats it three hours later!
So why don't I quit?
It's simple, he needs me. No one else is going to put up with his demands, attitude, and ego. But Chris wouldn't be able to function without me, as I control everything in his life. He knows it too, he just acts like he doesn't.
Another reason I stay is to watch him wrestle. I always sit in the audience during his matches, to escape. That, and he makes me take notes on his matches and everything he does that is wow worthy. But besides that, for those ten minutes he is in the ring, I'm at peace. No one can deny is a phenomenal wrestler.
"What?" I break out of my thoughts as my phone starting ringing. It was Chris, surprise, surprise.
"Tina, I also need twelve candles, vanilla scented."
"I don't have that much money on me." He only gave me twenty dollars.
"Use the credit card I gave you."
"Fine, bye." Chris had given me a credit card a month ago in his name. Apparently he got sick of carrying cash around. Who knows, it's Chris.
I finish getting his boxers, and slowly walk around trying to figure out where the candles were. Why the hell is no Wal-Mart set up the same way? Each one is different and it drives me crazy. I finally found the candles near the laundry detergent. Why did he need twelve candles, anyway? Finally, I could leave and go back to the hotel and sleep. I heard my familiar ringtone again, and sighed.
"Tina, I also need condoms." Hell. No.
"I am not buying you condoms. And why do you need them, you never have a girl?"
"Get the lubricated ones. But not the ones that glow in the dark, they are just freaky."
"I'm not buying condoms for you."
"Hurry up and buy them and get back! Now! Go!"
"No! Come buy your own!"
"You are my assistant, so do what I say, or I will replace you, immediately." I almost laugh at his threat. Yeah right.
"Fine, maybe she'll buy you condoms." I didn't wait for him to respond before hanging up.
Walking up to the register I paid for the clothes and the candles, but not the condoms. I always feel weird with that stuff. It is my belief that men should buy the condoms and the women should buy the tampons. The woman at the register looked at me funny when I handed her the credit card with Chris's name on it. She looked at me in surprise when I knew the pin number. God, I hate him! It was a short drive back to the hotel, thankfully. I was ready for an argument when I stepped foot in his room.
"Here's your clothes and your candles." I threw the bags down on the bed and watched as he went through them.
"By the way, you're fired." His voice was stern, and he didn't look at me. Good, two can play that game.
"Good. Now I don't have to put up with you and can live in peace."
"Great, now I can hire someone who will buy me condoms!"
"Here's the money you gave me to get this stuff, and here's the credit card. I'm going home." I threw the money and the card at him and left.
"Tina, wait!" I heard him yell behind me, but I was already gone. I made it to my hotel room in record time and began packing. My phone rang but I simply shut it off. It was Chris calling anyway. I decided I'd wait until morning to try and catch a flight home. I haven't been to Virginia in ages. I miss home.
Of course I can't fall asleep right away. My mind travels back to when I first met Chris. Three years ago is when he interviewed me for the position. I was his first and last interview. He was an ass back then too, so it wasn't like I didn't know what I was getting myself into. I felt a silent tear run down my cheek, and I quickly brushed it away. There was no use in crying that asshole.
Even if I did love him.
That was my problem. I loved him. How was it possible to fall in love with an egotistical, arrogant, conceited, self-centered, jerk? I don't know the answer to that, I just know it is possible. Very possible. He is so oblivious though, he'll never know, and I'll never tell him. I was finally on the brink of sleep when I heard rustling outside my door.
"Almost heaven, West Virginia, Blue Ridge mountains, the Shenandoah River, Life is old there, older than the trees, younger than the mountains growin' like a breeze." I felt more tears sliding down my face as he quietly sang. This was an inside joke between us, as Chris always said West Virginia was better than Virginia, even though he knew I was from there. So for the first six months I traveled with him, he would sing this song.
"Country roads, take me home, to the place, I belong, West Virginia, mountain momma, take me home country roads." I slowly walked towards the door, but didn't open it as I reached it. I simply began singing softly, along with him.
"All my memories, gathered round' her, Miner's lady, stranger to blue water, dark and dusty painted on the sky, misty taste of moonshine, teardrop in my eye." We both sang softly, together. He definitely had his moments that reminded me why I loved him so much.
"Country roads, take me home, to the place, I belong, West Virginia, mountain momma, take me home, country roads." We both finished. I slowly opened the door and faced him.
"I hate you." I mumbled.
"I know." He whispered as he pulled he towards him and hugged me. These moments were rare with Chris, but this was his way of apologizing.
"I'm still not buying you condoms." With his arms still around me, he led us into my room.
"They were for you anyway, so I don't care." His attitude was back. Woo. I pulled back away from him.
"What do you mean they were for me?"
"I mean, you've been lusting after me for three years, I decided I was going to be nice and do something about it." I am more than sure my cheeks just turned red.
"I have not been lusting after you!"
"Fine, call it what you will. Point is, you want me. I was being nice and doing something about it." How was he able to say this like it was nothing? Talk about confidence.
"Firing me is not doing something about it!" I could have slapped myself when the words left my mouth.
"So you admit, there is something?"
"...no." I mumble as he smirks. Damn him.
"I think you are lying."
"I think you're a jerk."
"I think you want me to kiss you." His smirk grew as he stepped closer.
"I think....I think..." I trailed off. What did I think?
"You think what?" His face was only an inch or two from mine. He was so close.
"I think you're right." Oh, that was bold. I am never bold.
"When am I not?" And there is the cockiness. He didn't even give me a chance to comment on it before he kissed me. I've been waiting for this for three years, and he isn't disappointing at all!
"See, if you'd have bought the condoms, we could be getting down and dirty." He joked, running his tongue along my lower lip, making my knees tremble. Damn him.
"I'm on the pill." I wonder if he could sense my excitement? Maybe me dragging him to the bed and climbing on top of him gave him a clue.
Two hours of sex with Chris Jericho was......mind blowing. I can barely move as I lay tangled with him in the bed. I'd just like to get it out in the open right now; the man has every right to brag. We are both trying to catch our breath, and I know the awkward moments are going to appear soon. Where do we go after this?
"Almost heaven....." Chris turned and looked at me. I couldn't help breaking out into laughter. Only he would turn a John Denver song into something sexual.
"Shut up." I bury my face into the crook of his neck, still laughing.
"Does this mean I got my job back?" I ask him.
"I was thinking of giving you a promotion."
"And exactly what can a personal assistant get promoted to?"
"Really?" I couldn't help the smile that was etched on my face.
"Well, only if you accept, of course."
"I just don't see what choice I have except to say yes."
"You still need to get me coffee in the morning."
"We'll see how long that lasts."
"And Tina, next time, maybe you'll get the condoms without questioning me."
"Maybe Chris, maybe." He wrapped his arms around me and I laid my head on his chest as we both drifted off to sleep.
"Happy Birthday, Tina." My eyes shot open.