I'm am just gushing with pride here. I have always wanted to write a J-rock fic and now I have. Oh, this is a happy day indeed! Why? Because the plot for this story was born of my being watching fanvids of Miyavi, The gazettE, and Dir en Grey. Originally it was just going to focus on Miyavi and Gackt but it didn't feel right so that draft was crumpled and thrown away. I'm glad it was thrown away 'cause this one is much better, I think. But anywho...yes, I'm a very happy girl at the moment! Though, would this be considered a crack-fic. IDK...but it's whatever. I'm just plan o' happy!

So, please enjoy the silliness that is Miyavi and his adorable antics. Reviews would be a nice goodie for me, too!

Disclamier: Miyavi, The gazettE, Dir en Grey, Gackt, and Yoshiki belong to themselves. I claim no onwership to them...except maybe through their CDs but that's about it and it's a very indirect onwership. ^_^

"Has any one seen Miyavi?"

Co-workers and staff shook their heads. For such a tall guitarist, Miyavi had a way of hiding himself. You would think for such a tall person he would be clumsy and all but Miyavi wasn't. Today, Miyavi would be using his skills to complete a mission.

Miyavi walked close to the wall, doing his best to blend in. Staff who passed by were used to his antics. Whenever one would pass him, Miyavi would stand still or hug the wall until they left. No one stopped to question him until Reita happened to walk by. Miyavi stopped and clung to the wall. Reita stared at him, wondering if he should ask.

"What are you doing?" he had to ask.

"I'm on a mission," replied Miyavi. He stepped away from the wall and looked around for signs of anyone else.

"What mission?"

"I'm looking for Kyo."

Reita tilted his head, "Kyo? As in Dir en Grey?"

Miyavi nodded, "Hai."


Miyavi looked at Reita and grinned. His eyes held a mischievous gleam to them. "It's a secret." He leaned close to Reita and kissed him before he dashed at the speed of light. Reita stared at the spot where Miyavi used to be. He swore he could see the outline of the guitarist before it disappeared. Reita shrugged and touched his lips.

"I should see Ruki now." Reita continued on his way to Ruki's dressing room as if nothing had happened.

Meanwhile Miyavi had reached the second floor. He pressed himself against the wall and looked around for any signs of people. He saw no one. He moved away from the corner and prepared himself. He hopped lightly on his feet as he sprinted down the hallway. He made it halfway down the hall when someone suddenly appeared around the corridor. Miyavi couldn't stop in time and he crashed into the unfortunate person. The fall was inevitable as well as the minor pain it came with although Mayatan took most of the blow.

"Ah, gomen Mayatan. You should really look where you're going." Miyavi said. He looked down at Maya who was rubbing his sore head.

"I should be telling you the same thing, Miyavi."

"You already did," Pointed out Miyavi. Maya grinned and decided to point out another obvious fact.

"Do you find me comfortable?" Maya asked.

"Ah, very." The result of the crash caused Miyavi to land on top of Maya.

"So where are you going?" asked Maya, as if carrying a conversation with Miyavi practically straddling him was completely normal which it was if that person was Miyavi.

"I'm in search of Kyo." Miyavi said. Maya furrowed his brow in confusion.


Again, Miyavi grinned. He leaned down and kissed Maya. "It's a secret." Then he ran off. Maya sat up and stared at the retreating back of Miyavi. His stomach grumbled as he pulled out his cell phone.

"I wonder if there's anymore of that cake?" he said as he began texting Aiji.

This time Miyavi crouched low to the floor as he reached the third floor. He slowly crawled towards the first corner. He sat on his heels, ready to sprint at any moment. Slowly, he peeked around the corner and saw shiny polished shoes. He looked up and saw that the shoes belong to Gackt.

"Ah, Gack-Nii, Konnichiwa," greeted Miyavi.

"Should I ask?"


"…what are you doing?"

For the third time today, Miyavi grinned. Instead of kissing Gackt, he opted for a cop-a-feel and ran away yelling, "I'm on a mission!" He left behind a rather confused Gackt who was looking down at his crotch. The crotch grabbing didn't bother him. It was the fact that it happened so suddenly that bothered him.

"I'll get him later." Gackt said to himself and continued on his way to where ever he was going."

Now on the fourth floor, Miyavi stopped. The hallways were completely empty of staff. Miyavi walked around for a bit. Not a single person was on this floor. He took his time and eventually came to a dressing room with the door slightly open. Curiosity killed the cat, or in this case, the J-rocker but Miyavi being Miyavi ventured in.

"Found you!" Miyavi yelled.

"Found who?"

It was Uruha and Aoi, naked from the waist up. To make matters much worse, Uruha had a hand down Aoi's pants. Miyavi blinked at the pair and slowly walked back and closed the door. Uruha and Aoi looked at each other. The sudden entry of Miyavi had startled them out of their skin. It didn't help that they were in a very compromising position with Aoi on Uruha's lap, facing him, with Uruha's hand still down Aoi's pants. The doorknob jiggled and Miyavi stepped back in.

"Hmm… so this isn't Kyo's room?" Miyavi asked.

"Of course not! Were you expecting it to suddenly turned into Kyo's room after you left the first time?" Uruha was cranky and for obvious reasons.

"…hai," replied Miyavi. Uruha growled while Aoi chuckled.

"Did you want something?" Uruha asked. The sooner Miyavi was gone the more time he'll have with Aoi before the rest of his band member realized they were gone. Miyavi looked at the pair, completely ignoring the get-out signals from Uruha.

"So where exactly is Kyo's room?"

"Up on the sixth floor," replied Aoi.

"Ah...arigato." Miyavi slowly closed the door behind him. Uruha sighed in relief and focused his attention back on Aoi.

"Let's take care of this first…" Uruha said with a slight shake of the hand that was down Aoi's pants. Aoi flinched and rubbed himself against Uruha's hand as, for the third time, the doorknob jingled. Miyavi dashed in, kissed them both, and handed Aoi a chain of condoms. He laughed and dodged a flying object that was aimed at his hand. Uruha was too stunned to do anything but roar.

"I think he took twenty years of my life," grumbled Uruha. He slipped his hand out of Aoi's pants and grabbed the condoms.

"At least he's considerate."

"And mental." Uruha said as he threw the condoms away. He pulled Aoi closer as they kissed.

Miyavi was just a flight away from Kyo. All he needed to do was go through the fifth floor. Suddenly on the alert Miyavi, clung to the walls. On the other side of the fifth floor was the stairs leading to the sixth floor. He was close to his goal. With his ninja-like skills, Miyavi tip toed around corners, clung to the walls, and made himself invisible (In his head he was invisible. In reality, staff and co-workers could see him but they just went about their ways). As Miyavi neared the stairwell, Gackt appeared, blocking his path. Miyavi dragged his feet to the floor to slow his run but it was too late.

In a flash, Gackt grabbed Miyavi around the waist. He pulled the tall guitarist towards him and, with the straightest face possible, grabbed Miyavi southern region. Miyavi froze and looked down at the prettiest hand that was holding his prized jewels through his pants. A movement caught his attention and Miyavi looked down the corridor to his right. Kai was looking at what seemed to be the weirdest stance ever. Miyavi looked back at Gackt.

"…should I cough now?"


…followed by the loud roaring laughter of Kai. His whole body shook from laughing. Gackt smiled and pulled his hand away.

"Now we're even." He said in a very cool way and walked off in a very cool manor. Meanwhile, Kai was still laughing his head off. He leaned against the wall for support because he was laughing way too much to be able to support his own weight. Miyavi turned to him as he slowly rubbed himself.

"I was scared he was going to rip them off," whined Miyavi. Kai was too busy laughing to reply. A bit peeved, Miyavi grabbed Kai, wrapped an arm around the drummer's waist while he slid his other arm around Kai's neck as he gave Kai a kiss he wouldn't forget. Miyavi easily overpowered Kai and had him pressed against the wall. A long slender leg was pressed between Kai's legs. Miyavi ran his finger through Kai's hair and grabbed a fistful, gently pulling Kai's head back for better access.

After the ultimate battle of the tongues, Miyavi pulled away. If Kai couldn't breathe before, Miyavi left him breathless now. Kai's knee gave in as he leaned against the wall and he slid to the floor. Miyavi stood over Kai, giving the drummer his lopsided grin lip ring tilted and eyes gleaming.

"You took advantage of me!"

"You weren't listening to me." Miyavi said as he knelt beside Kai.

"Well, excuse me for laughing," pouted Kai. Miyavi smiled and leaned closer to Kai. Their faces were inches away from each other.

"You liked it," stated Miyavi.

"That's beside the point. Why did Gackt do that?"

"Ah, you see, I grabbed him on my way to the…" Miyavi suddenly stood up. He was still on his mission.

"Ne? Miyavi-san?"

"Can't talk. On a mission!" Miyavi ran away but as he reached the stairwell to the sixth floor he made a u-turn back to Kai.

"Forgot something?"

"As the Americans say, Uruha and Aoi are bumping uglies."

Kai's eyes widen. "It's about time!" he said as he whipped out his cell phone faster than Maya. There was no doubt Kai was sending the message to Ruki and Reita. "Which floor?"

"The fourth floor." Then Miyavi dashed away.

Miyavi reached his goal. He was now on the sixth floor. Somewhere on this floor was Kyo and Miyavi was determined to see his mission through. He resumed ninja mode (Miyavi-style) as he once again clung to walls, tip toed around corners and became 'invisible'. His co-workers just shrugged and went about their day. After ducking, hiding, and being as conspicuous as possible Miyavi finally stood in front of Kyo's dressing room. He pressed his ear against the door and heard snoring.

"Bringo!" Miyavi said in English. He gently grabbed the doorknob and slowly pushed the door open. The first person he was Shinya, the youngest of Dir en Grey. He was sleeping on a sofa against the wall. Miyavi moved further in to the room. The next person he saw was Tochi. He was on a recliner chair, his chin resting on his chest. He was sleeping as well. The final third person he saw was his target, Kyo…sleeping on the silliest makeshift bed Miyavi had ever seen. Five chairs were lined up in a row; Kyo's head being on the cushioned chair. The rest of his body was supported by the other chairs.

"Wow, he really can sleep anywhere." Miyavi tip toed closer to the small blonde Japanese singer. He looked completely different without the heavy make-up or the blood; vomit, etc., that usually dripped from his mouth during his live concerts. Nonetheless Kyo still looked cute, especially with his eyebrow, nose, and lip piercing. It just made him look even cuter with his normal face.

"Okay, now for part one." Miyavi leaned down and began kissing Kyo. He needed Kyo awake for part two to work and it seemed rude to just wake Kyo up by shaking him awake. So, in Miyavi's mind, he concluded being awoken by kisses was okay. He kept on kissing the singer on Dir en Grey.

After twenty kisses or so, Kyo started to wake up. Miyavi stopped and watched. Kyo blinked, blinked again, and stared up at the face of Miyavi. He grumbled and attempted to roll away but he seemed to have forgotten he was sleeping on a makeshift bed. So it was his Miyavi's fault, and maybe gravity's fault too, that Kyo fell to the floor with a loud thud that woke the other band members. Miyavi backed away and watched as Kyo grabbed his head and growled. Tochi and Shinya looked at Miyavi then to Kyo.

Kyo growled again, the kind of growling that sent his fans in a craze and made potential girls have nosebleeds. Kyo picked himself up and stared up at Miyavi. The height difference was staggering.

"Wow…he's tall. Maybe taller than Die," commented Shinya.

Tochi nodded, "Hai, definitely taller than Die." Miyavi turned towards the other two and introduced himself. Then he focused his attention to the short blond man in front of him with a cute face and piercings. This was it; the mission was close to complete.

"I'm Miyavi!"

"Kyo…" The fall really hadn't shaken the sleep out of him. It was time. Miyavi leaned down and kissed Kyo.

"…and cute." Miyavi finished for Kyo. There were two identical intakes of breath behind Miyavi. Kyo had his head bowed, his hands clenched into trembling fist.


"Kyo's mad." Shinya said.


"Tochi, should we leave?"

Tochi thought about it for a second. "No. This looks fun."

Miyavi, being the fearless J-rocker for the moment, kissed Kyo again and very clearly sang, "You are C~U~T~E~!"

"He's dead."

"Hai. He is."

Kyo growled like a feral animal and stepped towards the tall guitarist. Miyavi stepped back, still grinning, and delivered the final blow.


And they were off! Miyavi ran away, laughing like a mad man while Kyo chased after him. Miyavi dodged people and co-workers and other J-rockers. He laughed loudly aware of the fact that Kyo probably wanted to strangle him. They ran through the fifth floor down to the fourth floor, leaving a path of destruction behind them. They ran past the corridor where Uruha and Aoi were, in Miyavi's word, 'bumping uglies'. Reita and Ruki were at the door, head pressed against the door. Kai looked up in time to see the blur of Miyavi and Kyo run past him.

"Ah, now I get it." Kai said. The only reason Kyo would give chase if he was called a certain word.

"Shh! I think they're going to come soon." Ruki said as he pressed his ear closer to the door.

"Should we charge in?"

Ruki shook his head. "We'll wait until they're done." Reita nodded and listened as well. Kai rolled his eyes. His band mates were the biggest perverts he would ever come to know. Kai stood up and looked at the path of destruction they left behind.

"I hope Kyo leaves him in one piece. Miyavi is better looking in one piece."

The chase continued to the second floor where they ran past Maya and Aiji. Miyavi almost collided into Maya but Aiji thankfully pulled him back. Maya was distracted by the cake to notice where he was going. Papers flew by and Miyavi's laugh echoed through the hallways.

"Why is he…?"

"I think I know why." Maya said but didn't elaborate. Instead he whispered it to Aiji in case Kyo might overhear. Maya was enjoying his cake too much to want to be chased by Kyo.

On the first floor lounge, Gackt and Yoshiki were lounging around the large room. They could hear the chase on the second floor, Miyavi's cute laugh, and Kyo cursing Miyavi in English. Yoshiki took a sip of his drink and smiled.

"It was you, wasn't it?" Gackt asked.

"What are you talking about?" Yoshiki feigned ignorance.

"What was the dare?"

"All I said if he wanted to keep his title he had to kiss Kyo and call him cute."

"Knowing that Kyo would get mad about the cute part?" Gackt asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I told him the dangers. He knew." Just then, Miyavi barged into the room. He slammed the door shut and leaned heavily against it. He took a few seconds to gather his breath. He chuckled and held up the victory sign.

"Mayatan, Reita, Aoi, Uruha, Kai, umm…Gack-Nii too but it was crotch grab so that counts too…oh, and Kyo!"

"Bravo, you're still the reigning King of Kisses." Gackt said. Miyavi laughed victoriously but had to stop short.

"Mi~ya~vi~!" came the low, malicious (but still sexy) growl of Kyo.

"Ah…got to run." Miyavi said in English as he ran towards the other door. Kyo barged into the room and gave chase, determined to hurt the tall guitarist.

"Gomen-nasai!" yelled Miyavi through bouts of laughter. Kai walked into the room and took a seat on a comfortable looking chair.

"How long do you think Kyo will keep running after him?" asked Kai.

Gackt replied, "Maybe until he's sleepy or when Toshiya or Shinya decide to help."

Kai sighed and looked out the window. In the far distance, he could hear Miyavi laughing and Kyo's angry and broken English curses.

"I really hope Miyavi stays in once piece."