Hallo my readers! Well, I got the sudden inspiration for this fic out of nowhere really, hence it being sudden. But anyhoo, I hope you all enjoy it!
It is quiet. A lot quieter this night than it has been for the past couple of days. Maybe that has to do with the fact that he is more relaxed than usual. Or, maybe it is because the kids are gone with Barret. Maybe it is all just his imagination, he doesn't know. All he knows is that it is quiet, and she is soundly sleeping next to him.
His relaxed composure has a lot to do with what the both of them have just done together, which he thinks about as moments of pure bliss. Every time he never wants to stop, but people get tired. She tires quicker than he does, but not by much. Of course, each time after he lies awake, listening to her breathing and feeling her back slowly rise and fall under his hand that rests there. He wonders what she dreams about, or her thoughts on what has conspired. Sometimes he even worries that she might not think he's that good. He tells himself all the time that those thoughts, they're a man thing. He won't be able to stand it if he isn't that good to her, but every time she comes back for more, so that has to mean something.
He smiles, running a gentle hand through her hair. She sighs softly, snuggling closer to him, a deep breath in and out and back to her normal breathing. He cannot go to sleep until he is satisfied with the systematic rise and fall of her chest. He worries constantly about her, even though there is nothing potentially dangerous in this room to neither him nor her. Sighing, he kisses her forehead softly and whispers, "I love you." When she says nothing back, it does not disappoint him, but makes him happy instead. He knows that she is asleep, and that is all he wants.
When he finally falls asleep, she whispers to him, "I love you too."
And the night is quieter than before.
The next morning, she awakens to an empty bed. Yawning, she stretches, then just lays there, thinking of the night before. Thinking of how wonderful he is, both physically and mentally. She has never felt better around any other person, and yet she has never felt worse. It is the former of these two emotions she feels at the moment, and she lets out a sigh of elation. How much more wonderful could that have been?
When she sits up, she sees him standing there in the doorway, gazing at her. She wears a smile, but not him. Not at first. His face is one of anxiety and, to her, there is a small bit of fear there as well. But, at the sight of her smile, all of this washes away to be replaced with the same thing that he feels: pure joy.
"Good morning Cloud."
He nods and says, "Good morning Tifa. How are you?"
Her smile grows wider, and for some reason she laughs. She laughs for a long minute, and for what reason she does not know. She just wants to laugh, maybe because she is just so happy with the night before. Even though Cloud and I have done this before, for some reason last night was different. Last night was a lot more special to me. It wasn't the same for some reason . . . I wonder why . . .
Next thing she knows, he is sitting on the bed next to her. Her hands are clasped in his, his mouth on her throat. She shivers slightly, then giggles. "Cloud. I'm fine. I'm actually just . . . I feel marvelous right now. I'm so happy with everything. Do you think that there is nothing that can spoil today?"
He smiles against her skin, then mumbles, "Nothing can sweetheart." Lifting his head, he stares into her eyes for a moment. "How about we just laze around all day?"
Her grin makes him just a little bit happier than he already is. "Yes! That is a great idea! I would like that very much Cloudie."
He laughs at the nickname. "I thought we established that I do not like that name."
Tifa shrugs at him. "Well, I like it! Now let me up you goof-ball. I still have to get dressed."
As she stands, the sheet covering her body, he says quietly, "No you don't." She sticks her tongue out at him, then laughs. Looking through her drawers, she finds some underwear, and drops the sheet so that she can put them on. Cloud is no longer in her sight, but she hears him as he stands to leave the room. Grabbing the sheet, she covers herself once more, but it is too late. He's gone. Why did he leave? Is there something wrong with me? Sighing, she begins looking around the room once more for a t-shirt of some kind to wear.
Just as she was getting ready to open another drawer, there is something going over her head. "H-hey!" It is white, and she can almost see through it. Tifa tries to turn around, but to no avail. The next thing she knows, her head is sticking out of a hole in the white fabric. When she turns, she sees Cloud behind her, a smile on his face like it has been the entire morning. She sees that the fabric is one of his own shirts. Oh. That's why he left. Tifa lets out a sigh of relief, then reaches up and kisses him. They are trapped in this moment, not wanting it to be stolen, but Cloud pulls away.
"This isn't right," he tells her softly.
Those words nearly make her cry. "W-why not?"
"You can't possibly kiss me the way you want to with your hands trapped in that shirt."
She giggles, putting the shirt on the right way, then stealing another kiss from him. "Let us laze about my darling."
The rest of the day is spent in a way that neither of them will want to be any worse, or they can think can't get any better.
A month later, Tifa finds herself thinking very much about the past four years of her life. Four years ago she saved the planet from an evil, crazed madman who wanted to summon his mother to destroy the planet. Two years ago, three brothers came to Edge, all with silver hair, all of them looking for Cloud and the information they can get from him about this "Mother" figure, or who Tifa knew as J-E-N-O-V-A. The leader of the band of brothers, a man by the name of Kadaj, in the end used the project's cells to become the one everyone feared, especially Cloud. This man was Sephiroth, the one they thought they defeated several years before. Of course, the original Sephiroth was dead, or so everyone wanted to think. Once he was defeated, Kadaj died, along with his brothers. A year after that, SOLDIERS who were part of an immense project were coming out from underneath the ruins of Midgar, and taking and killing massive amounts of people to call upon OMEGA.
She shakes her head at the thought. Killing people for your own gain. Or demise. However way you want to put it. All this thinking is being done in a very unusual place—the bathroom that is down the hall from her room. It also isn't helping her current demeanor, but instead giving her a headache. She leans against the side of the toilet, feeling very nauseous and horrible. It's too early for this! I mean, it's four in the morning! Oh I hope I didn't wake him up.
An appalling feeling sweeps over her, and suddenly she is leaning over the toilet again. Her throat is sore, almost burning, and her mouth tastes terrible. Like bile. This is disgusting. She coughs a few times, then sits back down next to the toilet. She is very tired, and just wants to go to sleep. What the hell is wrong with me? I can't sleep or do anything that I want to do without feeling like crap.
Suddenly, there is a small pressure on her back, rubbing against it. She glances behind her to see him sitting there, also looking very sleepy, and she feels even worse than before.
"Cloud. What're you doing?" She can barely hear her own voice, and she knows that he probably can't really hear her either. He shakes his head at her, getting up and leaving the bathroom. She sighs, tired of being sick. I've been like this for the past week. When is it going to stop? Tifa weakly reaches up and pushes down on the small handle that flushes the toilet. Cloud comes back a few moments later with a washcloth in his hand. He gives her a small smile, wetting the cloth in the sink. Cloud then sits next to Tifa, taking a gentle hold of her face and wiping the side of her mouth.
"You look awful," he whispers.
She smiles, wanting to laugh, but refusing to do so. My breath smells dreadful I bet. He does nothing but the task he has been doing, and that is comforting her in his silent way. She appreciates him, and what he is doing despite her condition. Even though it is a gross thing to be doing, or that, at least, is how she thinks of it. He doesn't care about all of that. Have I struck gold or what?
Suddenly she pushes away from him, that feeling coming over her again. Once more she leans over the rim of the toilet so that none of her wasteful scourings can soil the environment that is her bathroom. He leans back a little, to get out of the way and to rub her back again. The whole time Cloud says nothing; he just sits there with her through it all. And when she is finally done, Tifa is too tired to get up and go back to bed. After flushing the toilet again and letting Cloud wipe her face, she leans against him, who leans against the wall, and there they fall asleep.
"How the hell you do expect me to tell him Yuffie?!"
"Hey! Don't get mad at me. I'm not the one who's--"
"I know!" Tifa sighs. "I'm sorry Yuffie. I'm not trying to yell at you. I'm just a bit upset about all this."
"Wait. You don't want it?"
"No! Oh no, nothing like that! I want it Yuffie, so bad." Tifa sits down in a nearby chair. She looks around her bar, seeing that no one is there. Of course, that only makes sense if it is closed, so that is the way it should be. She places one elbow on the table, her forehead against her hand. Sighing, she wonders why her friend is being so quiet on the other end of the phone. "It's just . . . I don't know how he's going to take this Yuffie. You know Cloud. He's caring, and he's quiet, but what would he think about something like this? Would he get mad or something? I'm just afraid . . ."
Yuffie huffs. "I don't see what you're so worried about Tifa. I mean, I don't think he'll be angry. He might want this himself. Have you tried asking him?"
Tifa snorts. "No. You don't think that would be a little suspicious?"
Yuffie laughs. "Tifa, I'm a materia hunter. Suspicion is my game. I know what's suspicious and what's not alright? I mean, if you go up to him hypothetically asking, I don't think that would be suspicious. You guys are in a pretty serious relationship. It's understandable if you ask him something like that."
Tifa sighs. "Yeah, I know. Thank you Yuf." She turns and hears the lock on the front door turning. "That's him. I'll talk to you later okay?"
"Yeah. Good luck Teef!"
"Thanks." Tifa hangs up the phone just in time to see Cloud walk through the door. There is snow in his hair, and his coat is pulled tightly around his lithe frame. Tifa giggles, standing up, but hanging onto the chair for a moment. The sudden movement makes her dizzy. Her sight refocuses to see him looking at her, before shutting the door and locking it.
"Are you okay?"
No one moves, but lets those three words hang in the air for a long time. Tifa wants to answer him right away, but she searches frantically for the right thing to say. Yeah sure Cloud. I'm fine. She shakes her head at that thought. I can't say that. I'm not exactly fine. I mean, it's good to know I'm not sick like we originally thought, but I'm so worried about how he's going to react to what I have to say. But, I have to tell him. He has every right to know. Before she can open her mouth and say anything at all, he is there at the table with her, hugging her tightly. She gasps, not exactly sure with what to do other than to wrap her arms around him too.
He laughs at her slow response, then kisses her softly. She notices that his lips are cold. "Sorry about the sudden hug. I'm cold, and I missed you today."
Tifa smiles at him, near tears for some reason from what he says. Cloud is never really one to share how he feels, no matter what the subject is. However, he is a lot different with her, and she has a lot of proof toward this fact. That's why we're in the situation we're in now. She laughs at her thoughts.
"What is it?"
She shakes her head. "It's nothing Cloud. But listen. Can I ask you a question?"
He nods. "You know you can. Let me go see the kids first though?"
She smiles, taking his hand and leading him up the stairs. The first room they pass by is the bathroom, but this is shared by the two children they are visiting now. Tifa reaches the next room with him, gently grabbing the doorknob and turning it. In the doorway, they watched for a brief moment the two kids they are currently raising as they sleep soundly. It is dark, save for the soft moonlight that drapes through the window and onto the beds of the children. They do not move; the only thing Cloud or Tifa hear is their soft breathing. Tifa smiles, then closes the door, leading Cloud down the hall to their own room.
Tifa walks in before Cloud, her hands clasped together in front of her as she fidgets nervously. She takes a deep breath, looking out of the window. She faintly hears the door close softly behind her, before feeling a pair of arms snake around her waist. Cloud's chin rests on her shoulder. They stare out into their world that is Edge together, for several moments without uttering a word. Tifa prefers it this way, this quiet, but the more time they spend like this, the more nervous she gets. She lets out that breath she doesn't notice she's holding, and Cloud kisses her lightly on her shoulder.
"So what did you want to ask me?" He says quietly.
She gulps. "Well, I wanted to ask you . . . uhm . . ." She clears her throat, unsure of how exactly to word her inquiry. Cloud's grip on her becomes a bit tighter, not too much, but in a reassuring way. She sighs. "I wanted to ask you about something that . . . that could very well change our lives."
She shrugs. He always knows exactly what to say, even if it isn't a lot, that will make her even more jittery than she thinks she can be. "A lot. I mean, it's something you can't turn back from after it happens."
He laughs, and she knows that it is from her nervousness. "Okay then. So ask me."
Tifa takes another deep breath before letting the question slip past her lips. "What do you think about children Cloud?"
She waits, rigid, for his answer. His warm breath hits her ear, and in some way, that reassures her more than his arms around her waist. She remains almost as stiff as a wall, not knowing what he's going to say. And just how will she react, she doesn't know. If he doesn't like the idea, what am I going to do? What are we going to do?
Cloud kisses her shoulder again, then her neck. "Why were you so anxious to ask me something like that? Do I come off as that cold whereas you would think I don't want children?"
Tifa's eyes widen, and she turns around hastily to face him. "No! No Cloud, I don't think that. I never did. I just always thought you were . . . troubled. Yes . . . to me, you were always troubled. But . . ."
"But what?" His eyes are glowing slightly, or maybe that is just the moonlight reflecting off of them. He stares at her with confusion on his face, worrying about what exactly she wants to say to him. It can't be that bad. Tifa never gets nervous about things. She's always straightforward, always speaking her mind. "Tifa, what is it?"
She looks at the floor that lay between them. "Well, I've been thinking about it for the past week now. About what it would be like to have children. Or, at least one child of our own. I think with both Denzel and Marlene, it would enough if we just had one more child. I was just . . . I was just wondering what you thought about that."
She shrugs, looking past her out of the window. "To be honest, I don't think it matters much." His gaze averts down to hers of which never comes off of his face. Cloud sighs. "Tifa, if we did have a baby, I think that would be wonderful. But, if we don't, well, that's okay too. We have two great kids that we take care of already, like they are our own. But to have our own child would be nice too." I wonder what she's getting at.
Tifa gulps. "R-really?" Her eyes sparkle with so much joy, more than she ever thinks she can hold.
"Yeah. Why?" It matters, but why now? Why is she suddenly bringing this up . . . ? And then it hit him. Her being sick last week. She's always sleeping now. And today when I walked in she was dizzy, but she's been like that for the past two weeks . . . She eats a lot more than usual . . . His eyes grow wider. "Tifa are you . . . ?"
He watches her carefully to make sure his eyes don't trick him. To make sure he gets the answer that she is about to give him. He doesn't know how he will react to something of this magnitude. This is . . . This is huge. I mean . . . what are we going to do?!
And there it is. She nods, biting her lower lip and looking down. "I'm pregnant Cloud."
Slowly he lets her go. His arms drop to his sides, his eyes staring at her face, but she is not looking at him. He lets out a long breath, turning around and walking to the other side of the room. His hand goes through his hair, and he has no clue what to think about this whole situation. Tifa's pregnant . . . Tifa's pregnant! He wants to jump for joy . . . or something else that is in his nature to show just how happy he is. I can't believe this! We're going to have . . . we're going to have our own baby! This is great!
And then he hears her crying. Turning back around, he sees her still at the window. Her hands are fists now, and they rest at her eyes. Her shoulders heave, and he faintly hears the soft sobbing noises she makes. He sighs, going back over to her and taking her hands down. She shakes her head, trying to get away from him, but she sees that she is trapped between the window and him.
"Y-you said . . . you said you w-wanted one!"
"What makes you think I don't?"
"You walked a-away!" She looks up at him, her eyes and cheeks glistening from her new-shed tears. "A-are you mad or some-something?"
"No!" He envelopes her in his grasp once again, resting his chin on the top of her head. She grabs his shirt, crying. He rocks her slowly back and forth. "Tifa, I'm not mad. I'm sorry okay, I didn't mean for you to take it that way. I love this. I mean, we're going to have our own baby! This is absolutely wonderful Tifa. I'm not mad okay? I'm so happy . . . I love you."
She sniffs, then takes a deep breath. "You're not m-mad?" She feels him shake his head. "You . . . you want this?"
"Yes," he breathes. "I couldn't be any happier than I am right now."
She smiles, then laughs, looking up at him. She laughs harder, and it turns into crying, but this time for a different reason. She is happy, glad that he wants this just as much as she does. She doesn't want it to be any other way. We're going to have a baby! I can't believe this! It's wonderful. "I love you too Cl-Cloud."
He laughs, walking with her to the other side of the room. She trips, and he falls backwards onto the bed. She lands on top of him, giggling now instead of crying. Looking down at him she says, "If you were angry, I don't know what I would do."
He smiles up at her. "Good thing I'm not angry. Although, I don't really see why I would be . . ." She giggles again, and he reaches up to kiss her. He feels her smile on his lips, and he smiles himself. This day has got to be the best day I've experienced in my life, other than the day Tifa told me she loved me. He pulls away, then sits up slightly to remove his shirt. Not caring, Cloud tosses it somewhere in the room, then pulls Tifa back to him. She laughs again quietly as he kisses her, then she stops.
"I'm sorry Cloud. I'm just . . . I'm tired."
He chuckles at that. "It's alright. Go to sleep. I don't have to work until late tomorrow anyway, so I'll be here in the morning."
She yawns, then lays down, her head on his chest, his arm resting on her back. "I love you Cloud."
He lets out a deep breath. "I love you too Tifa. Sleep okay?"
She nods. "I'll try."
And, save for soft breathing, the night is quiet once again.
Okay, so no, it's not done. I plan on this being a two chapter fic, because it was too much to try and put into one chapter.
So, the next chapter will be up soon, hopefully by the end of this week. I just thought I needed a breather for a moment from my multi-chaptered fics. This is only a ...bi-chaptered one? Well, it's two chapters so yeah!
Yes, I know. The genre says tragedy for a reason.
And, please review!