I wrote this for Ninapolitan's "Friday Free for All" on Twilighted. Every week, a different Twific author writes a one-shot—either something completely new or an outtake from an existing story, which is what I did. FFFA is a companion to her "Smut Monday" series.

The content of this is a bit more explicit than what you'll find in FitV. If that isn't your thing, you may not want to continue. I won't be offended :)

This "incident" was mentioned during the football game in Chapter 17: "In Which All is Fun in Love and Football." This is the "missing moment" type of outtake, since it did actually happen.

Time frame: February 2005 – about four years prior to Chapter One.

In Which
Emmett Makes an Impression

"I can't believe Alice got you into a tie." Rosalie's words were low in my ear as she tugged on the tie and pulled my face toward hers.

"Hey, I wear ties sometimes." My protest was distracted, all my attention shamelessly focused on getting my hands on her, since we were finally alone. Her legs had been on display all night, and with her grandparents around, the opportunity to get more than a passing feel of her smooth skin had been nonexistent. She tipped her head and our lips met long enough to say "hey" and "how are ya," and then I was on to her jaw while my hands wandered lower.

"The last time you wore a tie was for the Senior Banquet, almost two years ago," she said as she yanked my shirt out of my pants.

"You remember that?" I disengaged my lips from her neck to pull back and look at her face.

She rolled her eyes and yanked on the tie again before loosening the knot. "Of course. Emmett Cullen in a tie? Not easily forgotten."

I really wanted to take a moment to comment that Rosalie Hale's legs in a skirt were about a thousand times more interesting, but the pale skin leading into the wide neck of her red sweater was calling to me, and had been since she answered the door three hours ago. I brushed her hair off her shoulder and slipped my fingers under the neckline of the sweater while my other hand briefly squeezed her tit before heading down her stomach.

"Alice wanted us to look good for Nana and Papa Hale." A black bra strap came into view as I pulled the sweater over her shoulder. I wanted to tug it farther but I could already feel it resisting, and the last thing I wanted was to get yelled at for stretching the material. I released it and ran my hand down her back instead, pausing when I came to the hem, which was resting at the top of her ass.

"They've always loved both of you. And you know that Nana thinks you're the greatest thing since Brando." Rose's nails scraped my stomach as she pushed her hands under my shirts.

"Yeah, well, you know Alice. Any opportunity to wear fancy shit."

"I'll have to thank her for that later. Come here." She gripped my sides firmly and pulled me toward her. She was wearing her ridiculously fucking tall heels, so I didn't have to do much more than bend my neck about two inches to reach her open mouth.

I'd barely touched my lips to hers before her tongue was pushing in. I could taste the wine she'd been drinking, and her lip stuff, and it felt good to have her body against mine after having to observe a respectful two-foot radius while we were around the other party-goers. I lifted the bottom of her sweater, only intending to get my hands on her stomach, but the moment I touched her skin with the backs of my fingers, I had to have the sweater off.

"I don't know if that's a good idea, baby." She pulled back and her hands halted the progress of the sweater over the black bra while she glanced to her right.

"It's locked, relax." I brushed my lips against hers in an attempt to distract her from the fact that we were only thirty feet from her family, locked door or not. Yeah, we'd been regularly getting down to our birthday suits in her bedroom since we'd been dating, but this wasn't quite the same. There was no need to point that out, though.

When she nodded and raised her arms, I started pulling upward again, careful to brush her nipples with my thumbs as I slid the sweater the rest of the way up her chest. She ducked her head as I pulled it off and tried not to tangle her hair. I dropped it neatly on top of the dryer before taking a step back to survey the situation.

"Fuck." The red sweater and black skirt combination had been lethal, but it paled in comparison to the the see-through lace and toned stomach now on display. She leaned back against the washing machine, palms flat on the top, and the upper half of each breast—nearly to the nipple—strained against the edge of the lace. Her tits were perfect no matter what, but in that bra, they were fucking magical.

"Problem there?" She laughed and looked down at my crotch as I adjusted myself.

"No problems here." I stepped back into her, forcing her against the washing machine as her tits pushed into me, and my dick pushed against her. "Molly Simms has nothing on you, baby." She looked away quickly and did her signature hair-over-the-shoulder thing, and if I hadn't know her better, I would have sworn that she was blushing. I wrapped an arm around her back, and pressed my mouth to her neck.

"We better hurry up before someone comes looking for us," she said, hips rubbing and pressing against mine.

"Better hurry up what?" Without the sweater in the way, I was more than enjoying being able to put my mouth all over her skin and wasn't feeling inclined to rush.

"Oh." Her breath hitched as I dragged down the cup of her bra, but she quickly recovered. "Didn't you want to fuck?"

My tongue stilled on her shoulder. In what felt like half of a second, the laundry room went from just above freezing to blazing. If the feel of her hands on my skin hadn't already had me sweating, I sure as fuck would have started when those words left her mouth.

I pulled back slowly to see if she was just screwing with me. I wasn't opposed to it, even though it would have to be at the speed of sound, but I hadn't pulled her away from the party with the intent of doing much more than what I was now.

"Please tell me you're not kidding."

She shook her head, eyebrow and corner of her mouth both arched. "Would I joke about that?"

Before she could think better of it—because really, it was a bad fucking idea—I pressed my mouth against hers and held her waist while she hoisted herself onto the washing machine. Her knees brushed me as she tried to raise her legs, and I gave her a hand with pushing her skirt up her thighs.

"You're gonna have to be quiet, you know. Not really your forte."

She huffed audibly and bit my upper lip before pushing me back so that she could get at my belt. "Look who's talking, Pavarotti."

"Hey, that was just that one time, and only because you did that thi-" My thought train derailed in a screech of metal as she unceremoniously pushed down my pants and boxers with one hand and grabbed my dick with the other. "Jesus, Rosie, your hand is fucking freezing."

"Oh, don't be a baby. This will warm it up a bit." Her hand was already moving hard and fast, and I had to admit that she was probably right. I dropped my hands to the top of the washing machine, next to her thighs, and rested my head against her shoulder. It was already taking a lot of effort not to groan—maybe doing this wasn't the best idea we'd ever had. But, well, we were already halfway there, so....

I lifted my head and found her mouth waiting for me. Once my tongue was pushing insistently against hers, I put my hands back on her spread legs and pushed them up her tight thighs until I felt her panties under my fingertips. A quick perusal suggested the rough material was lace to match the bra.

I sucked her bottom lip into my mouth and then muttered, "Up," on my next exhale. I almost whimpered when she released my dick, but then her ass was off the washing machine, and I was able to pull her panties down her legs. They joined the sweater.

"I'll have to be-" she said as she scooted her butt closer to the edge.

"You're not too cold, ar-"

"No, no," she panted as I returned my hands to the tops of her thighs. One of the advantages of big hands was that with my fingers splayed out, I could pull her closer to me and still push my thumbs between her legs. She jerked against my hand as I pushed one thumb against her clit and slid the other one lower to make sure she was as aroused by this as I was.

She broke from my mouth to throw her head back and moan as I pushed against her lightly and then with more pressure.

"Fuck, that's good, Em."

I became momentarily distracted by the sight of her tits arched forward, but she brought me back when she hooked her legs around my thighs and pulled me roughly forward. My knees hit the washing machine, and all of our movement halted when the dull, loud, metallic sound rang through the small room.

"Shit," she mumbled, casting an apprehensive look at the door. We were both silent for a moment, waiting to see if we could hear any voices, but aside from our own breathing, the room was quiet.

Almost like I was moving underwater, afraid to do something that would get us caught, I let go of one of her legs to grip my dick. She had already moved forward enough that all I had to do was push my hips forward just the slightest amount and I was right there, where I'd been a thousand times before, and would be a million more, if I had anything to say about it.

I stilled again for a moment, my dick pressed against her, and she dropped her head forward to meet my gaze. The fire in her crystal blue eyes almost had me coming all over her before I'd even begun.

"Happy Valentine's Day, baby," I murmured as I slid into her.

Everything went from slow motion to fast forward then. Her legs clamped around mine, pulling rhythmically and helping me rock into her—not that I really needed the help. I leaned forward to stick my tongue back into her hot mouth as I groped her tit with one hand and held on to her hip with the other. I could feel her starting to slide across the dryer's glossy metal surface, so I slipped my hand from her hip to her ass while I pinched her nipple and marveled to myself how every time with her was better than the last, even if it was just a quick fuck during a party.

"Is it okay?" I groaned out as I pushed my hips against hers, trying to work the slightly strange angle. It wasn't awful, but the washer was really a little too low for maximum fucking efficiency.

I could feel myself leaning forward more and more, and when I broke from Rose's lips to look up, I found that I had pushed her into almost a recline, and her head was inches from smacking into the wall or the control panel on the dryer. The position of her hands against the wall behind her—which very nicely pushed her tits out, I couldn't help but notice—explained why they weren't in my hair or on my ass or somewhere else, like they usually were.

"Um, actually..." She trailed off as I licked her lips, and then her eyes flew open. "Actually, it's a little uncomfortable."

If I hadn't been balls deeps in her, I probably would have chuckled because I could tell that she she was waffling between wanting me to keep going and wanting me to get the fuck off her. To save her the decision, I ignored all of my instincts and pulled out. It took two backward steps before I remembered that my pants were around my ankles. I barely stopped myself from crashing into a metal shelf of random canned food and boxes of pasta.

"Fuck, this is... just..." I sputtered as I tried to catch my breath. Rose clamped her hand over her mouth, her eyes bright above her hand, trying to muffle her laughter. I waited for a couple of beats before glaring at her. "Are you fucking done?" I tried to sound serious and put out by her obvious indifference to what would have surely been a catastrophic and potentially dick-threatening fall, but it was nothing if not difficult to be angry with her when she was half naked and mid-coital. When she nodded, still looking amused, I helped her slide off the dryer. Before I even had to say anything, she turned herself around and put her hands on top of it.

I wrapped an arm around her waist to pull her ass out a bit more, and then lifted my shirttails out of the way. Her skirt was still up around her waist—not surprising given how it had been nearly spray painted on.

I brushed her hair out of my way as I leaned forward and pressed my mouth to her ear. "Is this better?"

Her lips landed on mine as she quickly turned her head and breathed, "Yeah, baby. Get to it." She wiggled her hips a bit as I pushed the head of my dick into her, and we both groaned as she ground herself against me and took me the rest of the way in.

I rocked slowly against her for a minute, enjoying her wet mouth, the way her tongue knew exactly how to wind around mine, the feel of her firm body against my chest and thighs, even if we weren't skin-to-skin. When the urge to push her down and rail her like the fucking Neanderthal that I was usually accused of being became too intense, I detached my mouth from hers and straightened up.

With both hands gripping her hips tightly and my eyes locked on hers as she watched me over her shoulder, I thrust into her once, slowly, and then again, almost as hard as I could. Her eyes snapped closed as her thighs and hips hit the washing machine, and I watched her lips turn nearly white as she bit down and tried not to holler.

"Good girl," I murmured. It was becoming harder and harder to focus on anything other than her wet heat, and to ground myself a bit and make sure I didn't completely lose it, I ran a hand over her smooth back before slipping it around to her tit as I moved in her. It felt so good that I quickly relocated my other hand, as well. Half of her bra was still in position, and I speedily remedied that, and then the world was as it should be as her firm tits fell into my hands.

"God, Em...." she practically wailed as I pushed into her particularly hard. I released one of her tits to cover her mouth with my hand, and curled over her back.

"Ssh, baby," I managed between grunts. "We're almost there." I kept my hand on her mouth as I kissed the back of her neck. The tight, familiar warmth that had started low in my stomach was radiating outward, and if she could hold on just another couple of minutes without moaning so loudly that she attracted attention, we'd be in the clear. When her mouth shifted and closed over two of my fingers, I decreased that two minutes to one.

Between her high-pitched whimpers and the way her pussy was starting to squeeze me more tightly, I could tell that her orgasm was as close as mine was. To speed things up, I released her other tit and slid my hand down her side and between her legs. Two fingers against her clit, my mouth on her neck, and my dick buried in her, and seconds later I had to yank my hand from her mouth when she practically amputated my fingers as she came.

She collapsed forward a bit on the dryer, back heaving, and I was halfway to re-situating my hands on her hips when she lifted herself a bit.

"Almost there?" She was still panting, and her eyes were heavy when she looked back at me, but the moment I nodded, she thrust back at me so hard that I almost fell over.

"Fuck, Rose," I groaned. I dug my fingers into her skin and pushed back at her just as hard. "I-"

"Rosalie? Sweetheart?"

If I thought my heart almost stopped earlier when my knee banged the dryer, it was nothing compared to the full cardiac arrest I was about to suffer. And at the tender age of twenty, too. We both froze and ceased all fucking, breathing, everything, as Nana Hale's voice drifted toward us through the closed laundry room door.

"Rosalie?" she called again.

"You're sure the-" she whispered fiercely at me.

"Yes, it's fucking locked, I checked." I rubbed her back for a minute, and we both continued to stare at the door. When things were quiet for ten seconds, I slowly started moving in her again. I'd been pretty close to losing it before we were scarily interrupted, and my orgasm had definitely been deterred, but as Rose bit her lip and stared up at me, hair wild and stuck to the sides of her face, fingers gripping the dryer, I decided to take it as a sign that maybe I was due another few minutes of pure fucking heaven. I bent my knees a bit to try a different angle, and thrust forward.

"Shit, Rosie, that's so g-"

"Well, I don't know why they'd be in there, but we've checked everywhere else." This time Nana Hale's sweet, nails-on-a-chalkboard voice was followed by a very distinct sound, which even in my lust-haze, my brain was able to quickly identify.

The terrifying sound of a door knob rattling.

My brain also recognized the following click.

And then the quiet, squeaky opening of a door not used very often.

Unfortunately, all common sense fled us again, so when the door swung open two seconds later, and Nana Hale's expectant face appeared in the doorway, we were just as we'd been: Rosalie bent over a dryer, tits hanging out, her bare ass more or less in the air; and me, naked from the waist down, dick several inches into her only granddaughter.

If I'd been able to watch Rosalie's face at the same time, I'm almost positive it would have drained of color as fast as her grandmother's did. But I could only watch one of them, so I didn't miss how Nana Hale's eyes grew so wide and her face so white as she stared at us that I was nearly sure she was going to have a stroke or a heart attack or some other very unhealthy event. Then, to make matters worse, I almost groaned when Rosalie's whole body tensed as another voice followed Nana's.

"Nana, there's no- Oh shit." Jasper appeared behind his grandmother, his mouth hanging open for just a second before it audibly snapped closed. He quickly stepped forward, put an arm around her shoulders, and turned her forcefully away from us. As he pulled her with one arm, he yanked the door shut behind them, but not before I saw his face twist in a grimace while he rolled his eyes.

As soon as the door shut behind him—minus the telltale click of it being securely closed—we fell apart. I sprawled across Rosalie's back, my face in her hair, and our bodies shook as we both tried not to laugh too loudly.

"Holy fuck, Rose, we are so fucked."

"Oh my god, Em, did you see her face?"

"Well," I said as she shoved me away enough that she could turn around. Her arms were warm as she circled them around my waist. "Any chance she was talking about Last Tango in Paris Brando? Because then maybe I still have a chance."

If you're not familiar with the FFFA series, check it out. Among all of the other great entries, LaViePastiche wrote an awesome SoaPM outtake a couple of months ago.

Thanks to Legna for betaing, being a wiz with chapter titles, and endless ficwifery encouragement. Thanks to LVP for inspiration and a hearty pre-read.

Thanks for reading!