Next was the Actress, tall and tan in hue,

Who wore her fine designer jeans and shoes

Upon her slender legs and dainty feet.

(She was so skinny 'cause she didn't eat.)

She carried a Chihuahua in her bag.

She was a spoil'd and nasty little hag.

She'd acted in a thousand different films.

She lived in a big house in Bev'rley Hills

With her sixth boyfriend, father of her child --

A talented man, and quite meek and mild.

But she'd had sex with tons of other blokes,

So their relationship was on the ropes.

Her name was Paris Spears, or so I'm told;

She was a lass of twenty-three years old.

But in those years she'd done so much cocaine

That it had nearly driven her insane.