Don't piss off the Prince: A Digimon fanfic

Disclaimer: I can own Digimon. If this story does well, I will write sequels.

It was a happy day in the Digital World. Today, the Princesses of the Digital World would choose their princes. Princess Rika was not there, because she was asleep, in her "I hate boys" room. However, Princess Kari, Princess Yolei, Princess Zoe, Princess Mimi, and Princess Sora were. Sadly, Princess Jeri had been deported because of a Leomon toy incident. Every eligible Prince in the Digital World rushed in. However, this was actually because of the chilidogs, BBQ, and bacon promised. Not Marriage. Anyway, almost every Prince arrived in blue jeans and sweatshirts. And with high level Digimon. Prince Ryo wore his normal clothes, and paid for his foolishness with rabid, foaming, Ryo-hungry fangirls. After Ryo administered the rabies vaccine, they continued on. Each Princess dreamed of their Prince.

***

In the Royal Mess hall...

" I hope mine is cool as ice." said Princess Sora, the outspoken one. "I hope mine is pure of heart." said Princess Kari, the sweet one. Princess Mimi was freaking out. "I hope mine is dark and brooding." said Princess Yolei, the odd one. Princess Zoe was quiet. Princess Rika stumbled in wearing her jammies. She sat down in a chair, scratched her armpit, farted, and fell asleep again and started drooling.

***

Some place in the city...

"Guys!' shouted Prince Tai. "We need to get to the food before it's all gone!" "Hakuna Matata." Responded Prince Matt. "I'm still finishing this game demo." said Prince T.K. "I've still got some beef jerky." Said Prince Michael. "I'm cooking some Guilmon Bread." Said Prince Takato. "I'm practicing Pick-up lines." Said Prince Davis "I'm playing Prince Ryo in the Digimon card game." Said Prince Henry. "Yeah, and you're striking out like a batter without a bat." Said Prince Ryo. "That,' Said Prince Takuya, 'and he's bummed he doesn't any Hybrids." Yeah." Said Prince Koji. "And Prince Ryo has a Lucemon ShadowLord Mode, Susanoomon, and Beelzemon Blast Mode out. Which is kinda like cheating." Prince Ken sat there in the shadows, in Emoland. Then he stepped out, and said, no shouted, "WHO WANTS SOME COOKIES!" He threw 50 cookies like Shuriken , which speared Prince Takato in the butt, much to everybody's amusement. Then Prince Ken went back and brooded for an hour.

***

The castle...

"Princesses!" called their Digimon in waiting, "You need to get ready to meet the princes!" Princess Rika mumbled something, and all the Princesses gasped. Princess Mimi slapped her. "Language! How are you ever going to get a Prince if you act like that!" she said. "Maybe I don't want to get married! I'm out of here!" Princess Rika nearly shouted, and stormed off. "She'll come around.' said Renamon. "I'll go follow her. Make sure she doesn't get sexually harassed. That street gang still needs money for their operations. The castle still needs to be finished. We can't spare that much if it happens again." All the Princesses shivered in fright.

***

In the streets...

"I sure hope this disguise works." Princess Rika said. She was dressed in a dust-brown traveling cloak, Crocs, shorts, and had her Digi-Vice hidden in her pocket. She quietly sneaked in to the market place, but quickly noticed that Renamon was following her. And an overwhelming Aura of power. She quickly ducked into an alley, and ran smack into the Princes! Cyberdramon scooped her up by his claw and started questioning her. "What are you doing here? Where is the palace? Do you know how to get there? What's your name? I can tell if you are lying!" "CYBERDRAMON! What have I told you about scaring people?" Shouted Ryo. "Please don't hurt me!" Pleaded Princess Rika, playing the weak girl. "There's so much I want to do and see!" Then Prince Davis, always the comedian, pulled down Prince Ryo's pants. His boxers were adorned with Chibi Justimon. "That wasn't one of them." said Princess Rika, blushing and looking away. All the Princes roared with laughter. Suddenly, there was a ripping sound. Rika fell from Cyberdramon's claw, and a fragment of her shorts remained. "Nobody look!" She cried, covering her bottom. All of the Princes looked away. A few minutes later, she answered Cyberdramon's questions. But she didn't know who they were.

***

Somewhere in the castle...

"Well, this should be good for chapter one. But why that title? I'll solve after I get back."

"Big Brother! Where are you going?" To the alleyways little bro. The princes will be there soon."

***

Back in the streets...

He arrived with out a moment to lose. He whipped out his Laptop, and corrected every thing. Every one was stunned. Prince Tai and Prince Davis were the first ones to notice. "Who are you?" They said. "I'm a prince. Just like you." I responded. "What ever I write on my laptop happens. I'll show you." "No way." said Prince Tai "And suddenly, Prince Koji wet his pants at my skills" Suddenly Prince Koji shouted, " My pants are wet!" Everybody gasped. "And then, they miraculously dried!" Everybody was astounded. "It's time for you guys to get to the castle." I said. "Why should we listen to you?" asked Princess Rika. "Because, I am Prince Ash, and my invite told the truth." I responded. "What truth?" asked Prince Ken, finally revealing himself from the shadows. "You guys don't know? Rika knows." All eyes were on Princess Rika. "Why don't you tell us?" Roared Cyberdramon. "Cyberdramon! Chill out. I'm sure she has a good reason." The Princes waited for a reply. "Come to the palace." she said. Then, Prince Davis, always the one to speak out, said "Hey Prince Ash! Were is your Digimon?" Prince Ash stood there snickering. "You really want me to summon him? Seriously? Ok, you asked for it! ULFORCEVEEDRAMON! I summon thee!" A Blinding flash, a clap of thunder, a deafening roar, and spectral distortion, and a knight stood before them. A blazing powerful feeling of safety washed over them all. "I am One of the Royal Knights. The Exalted UlforceVeedramon!" he said coolly. "Let us go now to the castle my liege." Everybody was astounded. A Royal Knight!

***

Back at the castle...

"What do you mean lost her?" Princess Zoe said. "I tried following her but a strange power kept me back. And then there was this blast of light, and I couldn't follow her." Renamon said shamefully. "I'm sorry I failed you." "Cheer up!" said Princess Sora. "The Princes should be here soon." said Princess Mimi with a dreamy expression on her face. "Oh, what should we wear?" squealed Princess Yolei. "Princess Kari! Your Dress is ready! And it's cute!" Angewomon called. Princess Kari just grumbled.

***

In the entrance hall...

"Wow. Pretty cool place." Prince Matt said. "I can smell the BBQ from here!" said Prince Michael. "What are we waiting for then?" Said Prince Tai. And they all charged in, like rabid rabbits. A magnificent spread lay before them. Ribs stacked high as WarGreymon, Bacon spread out like a full house, mountains of Chili dogs, chicken grilled to a golden brown, and oh yeah, napkins. Lots of napkins. The Princes sat down and waited. Not very patiently. Fortunately, they were greeted quickly by the Princesses. Princess Rika had sneaked off. Prince Ryo noticed that she was gone. Then he saw her dressed in a simple dress, sitting with the Princesses. Soon dinner started, and the talk began. "Prince Davis pass me that knife. So Rika, what are you doing here?" said Prince Ryo "I'm one of the princesses." Princess Rika answered. KACHUNK! Prince Davis had not passed the knife, but thrown it in the air, were it landed in Prince Ryo's leg! "OWWWWW!" he wailed. "What's with the sudden music?" Prince Ash asked. (I feel a song coming on. Queen Fans, I am so sorry.)

Dinner Rhapsody (sung to Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody)

"Is that a real knife? Or is it fantasy? Caught in the middle, no escape from the screaming. Cover your ears, look up to the skies and see." "I'm just prince, I need some sympathy," " Because it's easy in, easy out. Little Hi, Little Low," Hit me were the nurse is, quickly, my leg matters to me, really, really matters to me."

"Momma, just got stabbed. Asked for a knife, turned my head, I could be dead. Momma, didn't to make you cry, sometimes wish I'd never asked Prince Davis at all. Momma, ooh aoooh, (were is the nurse?) I don't to die, if I'm still alive tomorrow, dine on, dine on, as if nothing ever happened."

Back in the Dining hall...

"Wow." said Princess Rika. "That was dramatic." "Yeah." said Prince Henry. "Especially the part where Prince Davis got blamed." Laughed Prince Tai. "Anyway," said Angewomon, who had just come in, " We need to talk about why you're here." "Lots of meat?" chimed in Prince Koji. "No," said Angewomon said, "Marriage. Some of you will be marrying one of the Girls in front of you." Suddenly, Prince T.K. snorted a rib bone up his nose. "Breathe little Prince Bro!" shouted Prince Matt. "I can fix it!" shouted a medic "Get him some water!" "Hey! That's Gilderoy Lockhart!" said Prince Ash. He quickly saw typing happening on his laptop. "Only one person would dare write my story... TUCKER!!!" Suddenly, a person fell through the ceiling. " Princes, Princesses, Digimon of all levels, meet my little brother and prince of cute things, Tucker. And his bakery bandit, Calumon." "Hello! What about T.K.?" Said Prince Matt. "Oh yeah," "And suddenly, the rib bone shot out a T.K.'s Nose, and speared Lockhart."

"Wow." Thought everyone. "This guy hold our lives in their hands. Better not piss him off."

What will happen next? Will a prince get kicked out? Will Prince Tucker wake up? Will anyone get married? Tune in next time for another Chapter of D.P.O.T.P!