A/N: So, this is my first try to write a story. I hope you all like it. It will be a funny/fluffy story but it has also a plot.
I don´t know if there will be an update scedule, but I hope that I can post a chapter once or twice a week. this Cahpter is like a prolouge. It´s just the introduction to the story and the next chapters will be way longer than this one!!
I just want to thank Heelstominivan for supporting me so much and helping me out when I needed a second opinion on something and I want to thank all the girls on the reunion thread over at the Twilighted Forum!! I love you all!!
If there are any questions about the plot or the characters, just PM me and I´ll try to answer the questions.
the next chapter will be up soon!! Oh, and sorry if there are mistakes.. I don´t have a beta yet! If anybody is interested, please PM me!!
Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight.
Mission: One-night stand
So, this is another pathetic effort to make my dream come true…a baby. Yes, it may sound weird for a twenty-five year old woman to want a baby without being married or even considering getting married, but that's really what I want. I have had too many failed relationships to believe in the typical happily ever after stories to wait and hope that my prince in shining armor will come one day and sweep me off my feet.
I feel like my whole life is a failure and I need something that shows me that there is a reason for me to be here. So, after my last horrible break up with a pathetic excuse of a man, I decided that I was just made to give love, not receive any. I am made to be a mother.
That brings me to my present situation. Here I am, laying in my bed, with another attempt to get pregnant from a one-night stand.
"Oh, god… You're so hot! Your boobies are like tennis balls, so tight and perfect…Mmmmm!" says Mike, the moron who is currently lying on top of me trying to figure out how he can open my bra. I think he hasn't figured out yet that the opening clasp is in the front. And boobies?! Really?! Welcome back to high school! Although it seems that it was easier to get knocked up 7 years ago. Oh my god, I can't believe that I am really sinking to this level, but I really want a baby. "Hey sexy, can you help me with this? I think it's broken or something…," he asks after a failed attempt to rip it off. "Mike, the clasp is in the front," I tell him while opening my bra. Maybe he is slightly retarded?? That would explain his bad pick up lines and his drooling. I think I should ask him about college or his SAT score, just to calm myself down that my child won't be a total lost cause.
Bella, keep focused! He's good looking, and a child with blue eyes and brown hair would be just adorable… Now shut up and get it over with!
Right, Where was I? "Ohhhh…Yes…Mike...you're so…manly! And so sexy!" I fake moan. Translation: Stick it in, stick it out and leave, you loser!
I never thought it would be so hard to get pregnant! This is my third attempt to try it with a one-night stand!
I can't stand whe-.... Did he just FART???!! I swear to god, it sounds like he's farting… Maybe, he has problems digesting food? Wait, what if he IS sick or has some illness or some rare hereditary disease?? Oh dear baby Jesus! My poor child won't stop farting!!
Just ask him before he starts getting too much into it!
Yeah, right! And totally freak him out!
But what if he really has some problems? Don't you want a healthy child?? Do you hate your unborn child and want to punish it with a rare disease where it can't stop farting?! If he's a boy, he will be an outcast at school, he´ll never have a girlfriend and after a failed suicide attempt, he will be living in a little apartment with his cat, and work at a grocery store as a cashier because he is too self conscious to attend college. Do you want that for your boy, Bella??! And don't get me started what it will be like if your child is a girl!
"Yeah, sexy…Talk dirty to me! Do you want me to put my big, throbbing..." Right... Big, my ass! I saw little baby boys who could be prouder about their juveniles than him. He´s lucky that he has a cute face!
"NO!! Wait, Mike! Erm, do you have any hereditary diseases or any illnesses that can be inherited or transmitted? Something like diabetes or maybe AIDS? What about allergies?"
"That's right Bella, talk dirt-…Wait, what??" He stands up on his knees, and is now straddling my thighs. At first, he has a confused look on his face, but after some thinking, he just shrugs his shoulders and answers me.
"No, not that I know! I'm perfectly healthy right now. Now back to work."
He starts kissing my stomach again, wandering upwards to my chest, leaving a wet trail with his saliva. God, that's gross!! If I wasn't so desperate, I would throw him out of my bed and out of my apartment in an instant!
Holy mother of …? Did he just try to growl?? It sounds more like gagging! Please don't let him throw up on me!! Now he's slapping my ass!! Such a sick motherfucker! Haven't his parents taught him any manners?? Wait, what if his parents are dead?? Or have some illness like Alzheimer?? That's inheritable, right? Is he adopted? That would change the whole situation!
"Erm, Mike? Do either of your parents have Alzheimer´s? Are they even alive?? Or are there any mental illness cases in your family?? Are you adopted??" Mike stops abruptly licking my belly button, which isn't turning me on at all by the way, and glances at me with a confused look. "Bella, why does it interest you? Do you want to start a relationship? 'Cause I thought this would be like a one-time thing, but if you want..."
.GOD... "NOO!! –I mean, erm…"
Now he looks at me like I am crazy. "You know, I think it's better if I go now," he says, while looking at his wrist, pretending there's a watch. He jumps off of me, gathers his things and leaves in such a hurry, it's as if his ass is on fire! I let myself fall back on my bed.
Looks like we're alone again!
Don't even think I'll talk to you right now, you loser!
Great, even my brain won't talk to me right now… I'm completely alone... Which brought me to this situation in the first place! God, I'm talking with myself again… No more tequila for me!
When I went out tonight to this new club, I really thought that there was a chance I'd be pregnant by this time next month.
Looks like Alice's idea it'll be. I'm calling tomorrow to make an appointment. I can't believe I'm doing this.
Before I go to sleep,I search for the folder with the files of the possible candidates... I pat my stomach and whisper to it, "Let's choose your daddy, peanut!"