Title: Subliminal
Pairings: Kirk/Spock
Warnings: Humour, spoilers, yet another mindmeld fic. This is also solely based on the film, as I know next to nothing about the original series.
Summary: Jim never told Spock about the Vulcan mind-meld his older self had done, back when Spock had thrown him off the ship for mutiny.

by Anria

Jim never told Spock about the Vulcan mind-meld his older self had done, back when Spock had thrown him off the ship for mutiny.

At the time, he'd heard the older Spock mutter something about emotions making the mind-meld difficult, or strange, or something like that, but he hadn't been paying attention because aside from the stuff about Nero, there had been flashes of – of Spock, doing utterly un-Spock-like things, and it wasn't like he'd never, y'know, with guys, starting with that one girl back in Iowa whose boyfriend had surprised them and been weirdly okay and then – and that other guy who had these gorgeous dark eyes, he had a thing for dark eyes— But yeah, he'd been kinda shocked because this was Spock.

But after that first mind-meld, Jim had been a little bit too busy saving the Earth to worry about what alternate-him and alternate-Spock got up to when the lights were off. And then he'd kinda forgotten about it, what with the medal and assuming Captainship proper and all. And Spock had Uhura, and alternate-Jim had known his father (which still burned sometimes, and how stupid was it to be jealous of yourself), and somehow both of those were reasons in his head for not pursuing it.

Jim only thought about it once, when he was curious about whether this-him could get off thinking about this-Spock. (The answer was hell yes.) Okay, more than once. But really, honestly not that often. Honestly. There was that other time when he was stressed out and in the shower and he hadn't planned to, the thought was just there, and it would be stupid to waste it – and okay, so there had been that thing with Gaila's vibrator but he'd been curious.

So yeah. He hadn't thought about it much. Really.

When he had thought about it, though, he'd decided not to tell his Spock about the mind-meld. (He'd have to admit that he'd caught older-Spock and normal-Spock talking together first.) So it came as a bit of a shock when Jim came back from the first time his Spock did a mind-meld with him to find his Spock staring at him with a look of total, naked shock on his face.

Well. Total, naked shock for Spock, anyway. Which meant since Uhura wasn't in the room, Jim was the only one who could see it.

They'd had other things to deal with at the time, so they'd ignored it and blasted their way through this week's attempt to destroy the Enterprise. And then Jim had decided to be very conspicuously busy with Captainly Duties (since it was him doing them, they deserved the capitals) to the point that Uhura asked him if he was feeling all right.

His mistake, Jim realised, was in thinking that Captainly Duties would stop Spock asking about it right in front of the entire bridge.

Alarm bells started ringing when Spock marched right into the bridge and planted himself in front of Jim's chair with the Vulcan equivalent of a very determined look on his face.

Jim was more than passingly familiar with that look.

"Captain, I wish to enquire about something regarding our mind-meld," Spock said. "Some information I received as part of the mind-meld indicated—"

"Okay crew I think I'm done here for the day Spock why don't you join me and we'll discuss this on the way to our quarters – I mean, my quarters – I mean the crew's – screw it, just come with me," Jim said in a rush, grabbing Spock's arm and yanking him towards the turbolift as he spoke, barely remembering to pass the con off to Sulu. With the doors closed, he let go of Spock's arm and reached over to push the 'stop' button. He leaned against the wall and pressed his fingers into his eyes.



"You did a mind-meld with my older self."


"You neglected to tell me this."

"Didn't think it would make a difference."

"You also neglected to tell me that our alternate selves regularly engaged in sexual activities."

Argh. He would not blush. He was a grown man, dammit. He took his fingers away from his eyes and looked at Spock, blinking against the afterimages. "I didn't want that to make a difference."

Spock had the oddest look on his face. "It has been two years since you first took command of the Enterprise, Jim. I understand the logic of not discussing this while we were unfamiliar with one another, but it would have made sense to at least inform me of your previous mind-meld at a point prior to this. It could have proven dangerous."

Jim pointed a finger at him. "Don't you go telling me it could have been dangerous," he said. "I've seen you and your other guy talking together, after he specifically told me it would cause a paradox—"

"Incorrect. He informed you that we must not meet. You inferred from this that a paradox may result. Regardless, if you saw us talking you would know that a paradox had not occurred and you could have told me—"

Jim threw his hands in the air. "Okay! Okay. So what exactly is your point?"

Was it just him, or was Spock standing a little closer than before? "My point, Jim, is that you should have told me sooner."

Okay, Spock was definitely standing closer than before. And sort of leaning towards him.

"You keep calling me Jim," Jim said stupidly.

Spock blinked. He had very dark lashes up close. "Yes."

"You don't normally call me Jim," Jim pursued.

"I did not 'normally' know that you reciprocated my sexual attraction to you," Spock said.

"That doesn't— Wait, what?"

And then Spock was kissing him, pressing him into the side of the elevator with both hands on his face. For a crazy moment, Jim thought Spock was trying some kinky new kind of Vulcan mind-meld, and then sanity reasserted itself – or something like it – and Jim surged against Spock, one hand fisting his hair and the other gripping his waist.

Spock's tongue was in his mouth, sliding along his teeth under his top lip and damn that shouldn't have been sexy but it sent a bolt of unexpected, shimmery desire down Jim's spine. One of them made a gasping, muffled, breathy moan – Jim didn't know who it was and didn't care, shoving off from the turbolift wall and into Spock's body. His friend hooked his ankle around Jim's and jerked, knocking Jim off-balance back into the turbolift wall – but this time with Spock standing in between his legs, pressed so close Jim could clearly feel hard cock, burning a line against Jim's hipbone. Spock did this funny little movement with his hips and Jim moaned, dragging Spock closer by the hair so he could suck on his tongue.

With his other hand, he dragged Spock's top up and trailed his fingertips over the narrow stretch of skin he bared, just above Spock's waistband. This close, he could feel Spock's shiver everywhere they were pressed together and they were dry-humping in the elevator, why was this so hot – ooh, if he moved a little to the left their cocks would press together and – Jim moved, and stopped thinking.

But there was a niggling sense that he was forgetting the other reason he hadn't told Spock earlier. Jim tore himself away from Spock's mouth with a gasp. "Wait, wait," he said.

Spock pulled back a little. "What, Jim?" he asked. His voice was deeper than normal – deeper because of him, and that was sexy enough that Jim's cock gave a little jump and he had a sinking feeling that he was going to get hard every time he heard Spock speak for the next little while.

But there was something – oh yeah. "Uhura," Jim said.

Spock stared at him, the tiniest puzzled frown pulling his brows together. "I do not understand," Spock said. "Why do you mention Uhura?"

Oh, great. Vulcan ethics apparently didn't include monogamy. Not that Jim was the greatest at it, but, yeah, Uhura, and he was kinda attached to his balls, thanks. "She's your girlfriend, moron," Jim said, tapping Spock lightly on the side of his head.

If anything, Spock's frown deepened. "I'm afraid you are mistaken," he said. "Uhura and I agreed to cease romantic relations, including sexual congress, approximately eighteen months ago."

What? "What?"

Spock's frown had gone. Instead, his mouth was curled up on one side by the tiniest fraction. "I believe you did not notice because our public relationship was professional and therefore did not change," he said. Okay, that was a smirk. Spock was smirking, the bastard.

Jim shrugged and grinned. "Just checking," he said.

Then he shoved Spock backwards and hooked a foot around his ankle so Spock fell on his arse. The look on his face would warm Jim's heart for many, many years to come.

Leaning over, Jim pressed the 'stop' button again and the turbolift resumed movement. Next to him, Spock levered himself to his feet and straightened his clothing, an air of affronted dignity to his silence.

The turbolift opened outside the officer's deck. Jim's quarters were at the end of the hall; Spock's were next to his. They were lucky no one was there, because Jim was obviously still hard and he was willing to bet Spock was too.

Jim stepped into the hall and walked a few paces before he realised Spock hadn't followed. Turning, he saw, Spock staring at the floor, arms crossed and – and almost pouting.

"You coming?" he asked.

Spock's head shot up too quickly to not be in surprise. Jim was about to say something when the not-pout vanished, and Spock stepped off the turbolift and joined him, standing at his right hand side.

There was something intrinsically right about that. There was something even better about the way they both half-ran to Jim's quarters.


A few hours later, Jim fell back on the bed gasping as Spock leaned back, wiping his mouth and looking very smug. Jim gave him a half-hearted kick for being smug about it when about an hour earlier Jim had succeeded in getting Spock to beg, knowing Spock would understand why he was getting kicked.

Spock batted Jim's foot away and dropped onto the bed beside him. He had his thoughtful face on.

"What?" Jim asked.

Spock steepled his fingers. "When a Vulcan mind-melds with a non-Vulcan, the non-Vulcan frequently has no control over what they transmit, but the Vulcan should be fully able to focus their thoughts and keep private that which they desire to keep private," Spock said.

Yeah, great. Jim would care about that when he wasn't sex-stupid. "So?" he said.

"So, it would appear that my older self deliberately allowed you to see private parts of his relationship with the James T. Kirk in the alternate reality," Spock said.

Which was a little creepy, but Jim still didn't see his point. "Uh huh," he said, yawning.

"Logically, I believe my older self intended that at some point I would become aware of this relationship he had had with the other Jim and consequently initiate a relationship with you."

"So your older self is a pervy matchmaker," Jim muttered, half asleep. "Shut up and lie down. You can yell at him later."

"I can thank him later," Spock corrected. But he lay down and let Jim roll over and sling an arm across his chest, so Jim didn't give a crap.

THE END thank god