Author's Note

This story is dedicated to the many, many out there that are at their hardest in life. Together we can change the world, all we need is a little love.

I would also like to say this is for a friend of mine - Dimmie Arnold. Without her I wouldn't know what TWLOHA was about.

I support To Write Love On Her Arms.

"The stars are always there but we miss them in the dirt and clouds. We miss them in the storms. Tell them to remember hope. We have hope."
- Renee Yohe

Depression is treatable. Rescue is possible. We can stop the bleeding. Love is the movement.

This is only the beginning.

To Write Love On Her Arms


I tapped my fingers against the steering wheel, my patience was running low. For months I had been following the TWLOHA movement and I was finally going to be a bigger part of it. I recall the first time I heard about To Write Love On Her was from my best friend Jasper Whitlock. His father had just died and he was having a hard time coping with it.

He would lie in bed every day, not daring to seek the outside world.

It was on shocking day that he arrived at school, fresh cuts on his wrists. The red stained his yellow sleeves, he tried to hide them but nothing could get past the students. Immediately I intervened.

"Jasper!? What did you do?" I asked him with worry.

"I can't do this anymore Edward," he said. Tears formed in his eyes and his lips trembled.

"Can't do what?" I questioned, my voice hitched.


Lucky for me he heard about Renee Yohe, lucky for me he found the will to go on. Without TWLOHA...Jasper would be gone. Every since that day I knew I had to do something, be a part of this. Forks, Washington was starting their own counseling center for depression, suicide and addiction. I quickly signed up to be a counselor, a supporter.

Today was my first day, and the green lights wouldn't stay green long enough. I smashed my hands against the steering wheel and glared daggers at the lights. I had five minutes...I wasn't sure why I was freaking out about it so badly. It's not like I had to be there early. I suppose I was just eager, happy to help the lives of many.

I had told Rosalie about this..she thought it was stupid.

"It's not your fault those emos are cutting themselves," she said with a snicker. I wanted to punch her, but instead I ignored her and walked away.

Rose didn't understand why people did this, why someone would create a community about "emos". Little did she know that anyone could be a victim of depression. It didn't matter about race, age, sex, life. Depression was a state of mine, a disease that makes itself home in too many. I was going to change that. I would help those who needed it.

It didn't matter if it was my fault or not, people needed love and I would be there to share it.

I pulled my car to the small brown building located next to the book store. I shook my head, this needed a bigger place. Perhaps a large home to shelter those who need more time...who need more love. I grabbed my backpack from the backseat and jogged inside, I was greeted by warmth and the smell of coffee.

"Edward..A ha! You're here," Angela said. She pushed her glasses up on the bridge of her nose and walked over to me. "Nice shirt." I smiled and rubbed my hand against the black shirt. I had bought it on the internet, in the right corner it read 'To Write Love on Her Arms'.

"I thought it would be..a positive thing to wear," I said. Angela smiled and nodded her head. She reached onto the table beside us and slapped a sticker on me.

"That way they know who you are..and what you are to them," I looked down.

Edward - Caring Friend

I smiled widely, "Thanks Ang."

"Everyone is already here," she stated. I felt my eyes go wide.


She nodded her hand and linked her arm with mine. She led me to a room where six others were. Three were counselors and three were the members. My heart panged with disbelief. Where were the others? I figured we'd have many people here.

"Come in, we were just waiting for you two," Kate said. I nodded my head and took a seat in one of the available fold out chairs. I took my seat next to Angela; our eyes quickly went to the ones who showed up.

One was a boy; he had blonde hair and baby blue eyes. He had his arms crossed on and his legs were extended it out. I could tell he didn't want to be here..but he was, that was all that counted.

The other was a girl, she had curly brown hair. Her eyes were on her feet and I could tell she was self conscious; both her arms and legs were crossed. She wore bigger cloths and shifted uncomfortably.

The last person was also a girl; she had brown hair that went over her shoulders. As if she was trying to create a curtain. She had her bottom lip in between her teeth and eyed the empty space below her.

"Let's go around and talk a little bit about ourselves," Garrett spoke. Obviously trying to break the tension. "My name is Garrett. I am twenty eight and I am addicted to coffee..clearly." He took a sip of his coffee and only five of us chuckled.

"My name is Angela. I am twenty two and I love photography."

It was my turn. I could make a list of what I loved to do...better make this short. "My name is Edward. I am twenty two..and a half. I just want to help." I shrugged my shoulders. That was all I could come up with.

Kate flipped her blonde hair, "My name is Kate. I am twenty five and I enjoy dancing."


It was the boys turn, he yawned. "Mike. Nineteen. I'm allergic to cats."

The curly girl smiled before grimacing. "I'm Jessica. I'm nineteen as well and I like to go to the movies." She turned her head and looked at the girl next to her.

She blushed, bit her lip then blushed more. "My name is Bella. I am twenty and I.... I like to read."

I smiled at her shyness.

"Who would like to speak first?" Kate asked, looking at the three members. Each of them looked away as if they would disappear.

"Mike how about you?" Garrett asked. Mike sighed and sat up correctly.

"To be honest with you guys I really do not want to be here. My grandpa died a few weeks ago and I've been down in the mom thought it would be best if I got some "help." I find it kind of stupid. I mean everyone gets sad."

Angela began to speak, "Well maybe your mom thought it would be a good idea to make sure your sadness doesn't lead to depression."

"Yeah, well, whatever reason. I'm here," he retorted.

"Jessica? What's your story?" Kate asked. Jessica's eyes got wide and she also sat up.

"A few years ago," she spoke quietly, we had to lean in. "My father sexually abused me and I got really sad before I got mad. But I wasn't mad at him, I was mad at me. I started to cut myself and I became anorexic."

"And you became anorexic because?" Mike asked. He seemed intrigued in her story, but he didn't need to be an ass about it.

"I didn't think I was pretty. Every time I looked in the mirror all I saw was this fat...sad girl. I was hungry all the time, cutting made me forget that and the hatred." Tears welled in her eyes.

"Well Jessica, once we began our more official meetings we'll show you that it is okay to love yourself and that there is more to life." Garrett said. Jessica smiled with pure happiness. "And Bella...why are you here?"

Bella looked up from her sleeve, quite shocked. Her cheeks flamed and she blinked a few times.

"Uh, I'm... a cutter as well." That was all she said, we sat there waiting.

"Bella. We can't help you if you don't tell us more," Kate said. Bella stared at her lap and played with her fingers in her hands. She only shook her head.

"I'd prefer not to share my story with the world," she mumbled.

"That's what this is all about, opening yourself to others," Garrett spoke.

"Yeah Bella...if you want help then you need to trust us," I intervened. She only shook her head.

"What are you doing here then?" Mike asked rudely.

Her eyes got wide and her mouth dropped. "I don't know." She grabbed her bag off the back of the chair and preceded out of the room. I was surprised to feel my feet following her.