SUMMARY: Rose wasn't always a bad girl. But now she can barely list anything good about herself. When she betrays her best friend and is kicked out of her social group, she knows that something has to change. But who can help her? And will things just turn out worse than before?
CLAIMER: I own the plot, characters, everything. However, the style is sort of like a Sarah Dessen Novel.
There are many things that people don't know about me. They don't know that I can't sleep at night. They don't know that I have a little sister that looks up to me, even though I keep letting her down. They don't know that I've tried to give up the drinking and the parties numerous times, but failed miserably every time.
Unfortunately, the stuff that people do know about me isn't nearly as innocent. Actually, I'm pretty sure that every single person in my entire school was talking about me today. Gossip from the infamous weekend party had reached the ears of anyone willing to listen.
I parked my car in the school's car park and braced myself before stepping out. Sure enough, people were staring at me, whispering behind their hands and openly talking about me. I ignored them as I made my way towards my usual area.
Morrison High School has a good reputation. We have a black and white uniform that is supposed to make us look more proper. It doesn't work though, because the girls just modify it so that it suits their tastes. I know my skirt is a little bit shorter than regulation. But what can I say?
The school grounds are nice. There are a lot of plants and pretty flowers. The school itself is made up of several buildings spread out around the grounds. To me the whole place seems like someone has tried to make the Perfect School. And I'm sure it would be perfect if there were no students in it. But alas, the snobs that rule this school are going to exist no matter what the grounds look like.
The funny thing is that I rule this school too. When I walk past, people are in awe of me. But they're also scared at the same time. I have the power to build people up or tear them down. It's a power I don't particularly enjoy and I'm sure I wouldn't mind giving it up.
However, it's different if someone takes that power away from me. It's one thing to voluntarily retire from a position of power. It's another to have it taken away from you.
I never used to be a bad person. I didn't drink to get drunk. I didn't have sex. I didn't party every weekend. But things had changed. Now I was about to pay the consequences.
My group of friends were sitting at our usual spot under a large Oak Tree. I approached them, head held high. Kendall looked up and met my eyes. That's when I knew that I was in for a lot of trouble. Her eyes flashed dangerously as she pursed her lips in a way I had come to be familiar with.
"Rose, I didn't expect you to show your face today," Kendall said in an icy tone meant to chill.
"Don't you know by now? I always do the things you least expect," I said sweetly.
"Like have sex with my boyfriend?" she asked with an arched eyebrow. Sometimes I forgot how upfront she was. She had no tact whatsoever, but that used to be something I admired about her.
I didn't reply.
She tossed her perfect blonde hair and smirked at me. She knew she had the power to do whatever she wanted to me. My 'friends' would follow her no matter what. She was the Queen Bee after all.
"He doesn't know how it happened. He told me that he must have been completely smashed to even go anywhere near you," she said, referring to her boyfriend.
I didn't rise to the bait.
"Just tell me. Are you that incredibly jealous of me?"
"Kendall, I don't have to be jealous of anything. It was your boyfriend who came onto me. I'm just sad that I was too out of it to turn him down," I told her. I sincerely regretted sleeping with her boyfriend. I had never set out to hurt her. I'd just been way too drunk to realise who I was with.
"I know you're hurt..." I ventured.
"Piss off, tramp! Learn to keep your legs shut!" she yelled at me. I took it as a physical blow. She was my best friend, after all. My other friends just stood around watching our confrontation. I knew I couldn't rely on any of them anymore.
"I'm sorry," I forced myself to say before I turned and left. There was no use trying to be their friend anymore. Plus, I didn't think I wanted to. They would only find some way to take revenge on me. Kendall's world was just a façade. On the inside it was actually ugly and so not worth it.
The whispering didn't stop. Even when I was in class, I could hear people talking. Someone was telling such a blatant lie that I had to restrain myself from not saying anything. Rumours got out of hand quickly, there was no point trying to stop them. The best bet was to wait them out. Not even a sex scandal could last forever.
"Class, we have a new student with us today. His name is…" Miss Jackson turned to the guy at the door. The class's attention was immediately on the new boy. He was tall, with blonde hair and a good build. He was cute in a slightly boyish way.
"Daniel Grey," he said for Miss Jackson.
"How about you give us an introduction," Miss Jackson prompted. He gave her a look as if to say 'are you serious?' before he reluctantly faced the class.
"I'm Dan. I've just moved here from the next town over. I play soccer. Umm…" He glanced at the teacher before giving a shrug. "That's about it."
"Okay. Take a seat. Let's begin with the lesson, shall we?" Miss Jackson said with a smile.
Every girl in the room watched Daniel as he took a seat at the back of the room. I watched him for a moment, got bored, and turned back to Miss Jackson. I needed all the help I could get to pass this class. I couldn't waste time watching a marginally cute guy that was already being mentally stripped naked by the other girls in the class. Hopefully, his sudden arrival would detract some attention away from my recent scandal. A girl could dream.
"It's always a bad sign when a gorgeous girl is sitting by herself," a voice said from behind me. I glanced over my shoulder to see the new guy standing behind me. What was his name again?
"How much does a polar bear weigh?" he asked me.
I looked at him with one eyebrow raised.
"Enough to break the ice. Hi, I'm Daniel," he said with a grin.
"That is so lame," I told him honestly.
"I know," he said as he sat down opposite me at the table.
"I'm Rose," I said after a moment.
"Ah, a beautiful name for a beautiful girl," he said, whilst still grinning.
"Are you usually this flirty?" I asked.
"This is nothing. You should see me when I'm drunk. Apparently I'm a sight to see."
"I can imagine."
"So, why are you sitting here all by yourself?" he asked, running a hand through his blonde hair. It was a bit too short for my liking, but it suited him.
I was about to answer when Kendall appeared, eyeing Daniel like he was a piece of meat to add to her barbeque. I sighed and gave him an apologetic look before I turned towards Kendall expectantly.
"Rose. Imagine seeing you here with yet another guy. I would say it's a surprise, but it isn't."
"You're so funny," I said sarcastically. Mean remarks had never been her forte. I'd always had to think of them for her.
"I'm Kendall," she said, sticking her hand towards Daniel.
"Daniel," he replied, looking a little bit confused by our interaction. He shook her hand and gave me a look.
"There are some people I'd like to introduce you to, if you want to come with me," she said sweetly.
"I was actually talking to Rose…" He looked at me in an adorably cute way. I just shrugged.
"My boyfriend's best friend is the captain of the soccer team. He was hoping to meet you," she told him.
"You can go. We can talk later," I told him sincerely.
"Okay. I'll see you later then," he said to me with a sweet smile before he walked off with Kendall. She glanced over her shoulder at me with a smug smirk on her face. I just sighed at her pettiness. It's not like I'd pounced on Daniel. He'd come to talk to me!
The rest of the day progressed slowly. Math was unbearable, like always. And Chemistry was a pain in the ass. Biology, however, was my saviour. It was probably the one class I was doing really well in (besides English, which a blind monkey could pass at this school). Biology I could do. I liked learning how the body worked and all of that stuff. I just hoped I could keep up my good grades.
People were still whispering no matter where I went. I got a lot of odd looks from complete strangers. It was really starting to annoy me. Like how random people would call out 'slut' whenever I walked past. Or how my ex-friends would giggle or give me menacing looks whenever I was near them. It was enough to drive me insane.
"C'mon Rose; just this once," Brett had purred in my ear. His big hands were all over me, making me feel hot even though it was freezing outside. I moaned when his hot mouth attacked mine, sending shivers of anticipation down my spine.
"I've wanted you for so long," he whispered as he took my clothes off, one by one.
"Kendall will never know," he promised me before our hormones took over.
"Huh?" I said as I was abruptly snapped out of my daydreaming with a shudder.
"I've been calling your name for the last ten minutes," Daniel said. I looked at him, taking in his handsome face, and frowned. Since when had he been in my Biology class?
"Since when have you been in my Biology class?"
"Since today," he said, giving me a strange look.
"What?" I snapped.
"You must have been pretty out of it not to notice," he commented.
"I was just…thinking."
He looked at me closely, obviously not believing a word I had just said. I smiled at him, desperately searching for a way to change the subject.
"What's up with you and Kendall?" he asked after a moment of awkward silence.
Great, I had wanted a subject change, but this topic somehow didn't make me feel any better.
"We had a fight," I told him.
"You slept with her boyfriend," he said sternly.
I groaned and looked away from him. Since when had people been so upfront with me? What happened to the days when everyone hid their insults in jokes and always skirted around sensitive subjects?
"Don't judge me," I told him, meeting his eyes. "You don't even know me." My voice was cold and I had my 'bitch' face on. But he had no right to lecture me on my morals. He didn't even know me.
"I thought you were different," he said softly.
"Shut up!" I yelled, causing everyone in the class to look at us. I still had my 'bitch' face on, so I aimed it at the class. They got the point quicker then Daniel had and turned away.
"Don't you think I regret it? It was a stupid thing to do. But I was too drunk at the time to even stand up, let alone turn a guy down."
"Then maybe you should apologise to her."
"I have!" I hissed.
He seemed surprised. "You have?"
"Yeah. But Kendall has been looking for an excuse to get rid of me for a long time now. I get more attention than she likes. In her twisted mind, she thinks I'm a threat," I explained.
"Don't blame other people for your mistakes," he said, sounding like some Buddha-Zen crap.
"Stop acting like a freaking Saint! Where do you get off lecturing me? I don't even know you." I was so mad I could have brought Hitler to his knees with one look.
"I was just trying to see what type of person you were, that's all," he said softly.
"Yeah, well, I know what type of person you are. If you've got a stick up your ass, I don't think you should be hanging out with me," I told him.
"Whatever," he said. He stood up and, without a backwards glance, left me alone at my desk. He sat on the other side of the room and immediately started up a conversation with another of my fellow students.
I was pissed off. Who did he think he was, trying to make me out as a horrible person? I didn't mind when I was calling myself bad. But I can't stand it when other people say it to me. I guess I'm strange in that way. Maybe it's because I don't like taking other people's crap. Or maybe I was just retarded. Either way, the fact still stayed the same. Daniel was a jerk.
I glared at the back of his head for a while, but then I got bored. It wasn't fun when they ignored you. So instead I returned to my work and tried to focus. I had to pass Biology. It would bruise my ego if I ever failed it.
After Biology, I definitely needed something to make me relax. A drink would do the job, but my mum would kill me if I came home drunk. Plus, my sister would be devastated. Maybe a cigarette would help. But then again, I wasn't a big smoker. I only ever smoked when I was really annoyed at something.
Huh, I guess it's a cigarette then.
A/N: What do you think? Tell me in a review!