Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter series. I did however just realize that I'd gone nearly two years without realizing that I had forgotten to put a disclaimer on this and the second chapter. Wow, I'm unobservant…
Well hello there! It's nice of you to stop by and give my fanfic a try. Hey, that rhymed! Anyway… This was my first Draco/Ginny fanfic, though not my only. To all of you just starting this fic, I hope you like it. To those of you who have read it and are rereading it or something, I love you! I love all my readers!
Oh, and I finally got around to fixing it. No longer is this chapter an odd ball out written in 3rd person. It's all in first person now! Well, the next two are going to get revamped too. Should be done soon!
So, without further ado…
I really hated hurting people. Sighing, I tried not to think back to the look on Dean Thomas's face when I broke up with him just the hour before. The hurt look on his face was almost too much to bear. He'd been shocked, to say the least. He hadn't seen it coming. But what else could I have done? I hadn't been feeling right about our relationship for quite a while now. It wasn't that he was a bad boyfriend, because for all intents and purposes he was geat. He made it a point to spend time with me, always held my hand when they were together, took me out as often as we were allowed to Hogsmeade. He even bought me gifts to surprise me with for no reason at all. Yes, he had been a wonderful boyfriend. But why then did I not feel right with him?
It didn't make sense, but that's how I felt anyway. It was sad but I knew I'd had to break up with him. It just didn't feel right when he'd hold me to him with my head resting on his chest, when he kissed me. Instead of butterflies when he told me he loved me, I got an uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach. I never could bring myself to say it back, to lie to him. But he'd never even seemed fazed by it, this lack of response. Maybe he'd been denying it to himself or maybe he really hadn't seen anything wrong. Either way, he'd not see it coming when I'd asked him to go for a walk with me.
Letting out another sigh, I stood from my sitting position in the deserted hallway. I'd not returned to the common room after breaking up with Dean, not wanting to face what was sure to await me. Just the thought of all the questions from Lavender and Hermione, the smug look on Ron's face knowing I was finally single again, the shocked and hurt look on Dean's face as he gazed across the common room were all too much to deal with at the moment. I just couldn't face it yet. I needed to be alone. I didn't really feel like dealing with people right now. I had to deal with my own guilt first.
I knew I shouldn't be feeling guilty because I knew I'd done the right thing. But for some reason it was still there, nagging her in the back of her mind. I'd begun feeling that guilt the moment I'd realized what I'd have to do. It took a few weeks before I could face it, face him. But, I knew I had too sooner or later and it was better not to string him along. But still, even with all the assurances that I'd done the right thing, I still felt like a terrible person for doing it.
My feet moved automatically as I absentmindedly thought back on that day, not even caring to look where I was going. I'd been wandering the castle aimlessly for a while now, too caught up in my own thoughts to see where I was headed. I was pulled out of my thoughts though by the sound of a faint sob. I shook my head, clearing away the depressing thoughts I'd been consumed with, and tried to pinpoint where the sound was coming from. Spotting a door nearby, I slowly crept forward to listen. The "Out of Order" sign on the door told me exactly where I was: the second floor outside Moaning Myrtle's bathroom.
Dismissing the crying with a shake of my head, I started to walk away. Moaning Myrtle was always crying and there was nothing that I could do about it. But then I heard it again, that desolate sound, and stopped in my tracks. That wasn't Moaning Myrtle's cries; that was the sound of a boy. There was a boy crying in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom.
"Hmm," I muttered quietly to myself as I tiptoed quietly back to the door, trying to see if I could hear who it was. My heart went out whoever it was crying in the bathroom. For a second, I wondered if it might be Dean, knowing he looked broken enough to cry when I left him standing in the hall earlier. I hadn't looked to see if he went back to the common room or if he too was wandering the hall. Another broken sob dispelled the thought for I knew by the sound it wasn't Dean. But, whoever it was, I felt the urge to comfort.
"I-I just don't know what–" I heard the boy inside the bathroom cry, his voice strangled and broken, sending pangs through my heart. He sounded so lost. "I can't do it! I just can't…" I froze when it dawned on me, when I finally recognized the voice. I was a voice I'd heard many times before, mocking me, making fun of me. But it had never sounded as vulnerable as it did now, never so troubled. I'd never heard Draco Malfoy cry.
A small gasp escaped my lips at my realization of who it was. But the question that remained was why in the world would Draco Malfoy being crying in the first place, let alone to Moaning Myrtle of all people? I could barely make out Myrtle's quite voice as she tried to comfort Malfoy. I couldn't make out distinct words though, and brought my ear closer to the door in an attempt to make them out. After a moment though, all went quiet. A minute passed and I realized I'd better leave now, before Malfoy came out and found me with my ear pressed to the door. Just as I stepped back though, the door swung open, much to my horror.
There he stood, looking down at me with a confused look on his face for a split second. Before I could blink thought, that look turned into a hard, angry mask. In that second though, the second before he put up his mask of hate, I could see pain, indecision, and fear written clearly on his features, as clearly as the tears that were drying on his cheeks. But none of that was left now as he stared down at me, seething with anger at what I'd witnessed. "
"How long have you been standing there?" Malfoy asked coldly, whipping his wand out in an instant and pointing it towards my chest.
"N-not long," I managed to stammer out, taken aback by the wand pointed at my heart. I gripped my own wand firmly under my robes, afraid for the moment to make any sudden movements. I had no doubt from the look on his face that he wouldn't hesitate to hurt me.
He looked down at me with absolute loathing written on every feature. "Don't tell a soul anything you might have heard, Weasley, or I will hex you till your brain is fried," he threated quietly, his wand moving to point threateningly at my head.
I nodded quickly, trying to diffuse his anger, and opened my mouth to ask why he'd been crying. I caught myself before any words came out, startled at what I almost did. I, Ginny Weasley, was a to ask him, Draco Malfoy, what was wrong. I was about to try and comfort my enemy, the man who currently had a wand pointed towards my head. I snapped my mouth shut, shaking my head slightly to clear my thoughts.
Finally, after what felt like hours but was probably only seconds, Malfoy gave his wand a threatening flick before striding quickly away. My eyes followed him down the hall and around the bend, disappearing from site, before I let out the breath I hadn't realized I was holding. Did that really just happen?
My thought preoccupied with the many events of the night, I decided it was time to head back to the dormitory. I needed to lie down and go to sleep. Maybe things would seem a little less crazy in the morning. The entire trek back up to the seventh floor my head was swimming with thoughts going too quick to grasp. Draco Malfoy had been crying, a very emotional thing to do. So, Malfoy had emotions after all. But why was he crying? What wasn't that he "just couldn't do"? What could be so bad?
When I reached the portrait of the Fat Lady I muttered the password, still engrossed in my thoughts. Stepping up into the common room, however, brought me back down to reality. I was instantly away are four sets of eyes all boring into me. One, the one I most studiously avoided, were the sad brown eyes of Dean Thomas. The other three, I was positive, belonged to Ron, Harry and Hermione. I knew they would all be bursting with questions about my breakup with Dean, but at the moment I didn't want to face them.
"Ginny," I heard Hermione call out as I headed towards the stairs up to my dormitory. Hoping she would take the hint and leave me alone, I kept walking. For a moment, I thought I was home free, but out of the corner of my eye as I was halfway up the stairs, I saw the older girl stand up and head my way. I just kept walking.
I heard her feet on the stairs once I reached my room, walking in and shutting the door firmly behind me. I had just enough time to flop face down on my bed and pull the drapes around before the door opened again and Hermione walked in. "Go away," I mumbled, voice muffled by my pillow, my mind too jumbled from the day's events to want to talk. Of course, she didn't though. Instead, I was vaguely aware of the drapes to my bed being opened.
At least, I thought with a wiry smile that nobody could see, I had a reason to seem distant and not want to talk, the recent breakup with Dean. I knew it was low, using that as an excuse when it wasn't really the reason. I couldn't bring myself to admit that my thoughts were preoccupied by Draco Malfoy of all people though. But I just couldn't get him out of my head, his sobbing, trembling voice, the look of pain and fear in his eyes before he concealed it with his mask of anger and resentment.
"Ginny," Hermione said softly, her voice compassionate as she sat down next to me on the bed. "I know a breakup is hard to go through, but you can't just shut people out. You need to talk about it. It's okay to cry." She begun patting my back soothingly as she spoke.
I rolled over and sat up, knowing she wouldn't leave any other way. "Look Hermione, just leave me be, okay? I don't need to talk about it; there's nothing to talk about. I just want to be left alone. I want time to clear my thoughts because–" I stopped mid-sentence, realizing what I almost said. Draco's threat was still fresh in my mind though and I shook my head. "I just want to be alone."
A look of confusion swept over Hermione's face at my unfinished sentence. "Look, I just want to be alone. Please, leave me alone, Hermione," I said again, dismissing her and laying back down, rolling over with my back to her. Pulling the covers up to my chin, I closed my eyes.
"Alright," Hermione said softly, seeming to understand. "But if you need to talk, I'll be right down the hall." With that, she left me be, the door shutting with a soft click behind her.
Thankful to finally be alone, I got out of bed and pulled my clothes off, replacing them with some worn pajamas. After putting my dirty clothes in the bin, I crawled back into bed, turning the lights off with a flick of my wand. Not long after I'd settled back down, the other girls drifted in and got ready for bed too. I'd drawn my curtains again and, shut off in my own little world, I ignored them. Finally, after quite a while, the sounds of my sleeping roommates filled the room.
Despite being tired, sleep would not come. I tossed and turned for hours, unable to find a position comfortable enough to sleep in. Add my swirling thoughts to the mix, sleep was hopeless. Finally, around two in the morning, I let out an aggravated sigh and gave up. Throwing my blankets off, I sat up, scowling into the dark. With a sigh, I fell back onto my pillows, seeing it was going to be a long night.
Thanks for reading and just click that handy little review button down there! Have fun reading the rest!
And remember, a happy author writes better and faster! So review and make me happy!