A Bugs, Lola, and Daffy Story
"No!" Bugs Bunny said for the umpteenth time.
"Aw come on Bugs! Please?" Daffy begged.
"No!" Bugs repeated.
"Please? My house isn't that far away. I won't hurt it!" said Daffy.
The two were supposed to be meeting Sylvester, Porky Pig, and Wile. E at the bowling alley but Daffy left their balls and his bowling shoes at his house. Now he was begging Bugs to let him borrow his car but of course Bugs wasn't having it.
"The last time I let you borrow my car you stole all my spare change."
"I said I was sorry! Come on Bugs please?" Daffy paused to think and then a light bulb lit over his head. "I'll let you borrow my Michael Jackson."
Bugs stopped walking. He was a total sucker for Michael Jackson. "Bad?"
Daffy smiled evilly. "And Thriller. They're in my stereo right now and if you just let me take the car I'll get them." He almost laughed at Bugs' defeated face.
Bugs took the car keys out of his pocket and dropped them in Daffy's hand. He grabbed his shirt collar and held up his fist. "One scratch Duck, and if I find one thing missing…"
"Yeah, yeah. You'll get out the Acme bombs and summon the sharks," Daffy said. Then he broke free and jumped into Bugs' car.
Bugs watched him go. He wasn't sure if that was smart but oh well. He decided to go across the street and get some food while he waited.
He came out of McDonalds with none other than some carrots. He noticed Lola coming out of Forever 21. He mouth dropped. She looked hot! She had on a tight fitted, mid-drift, white tank top, and Capri sweat pants with cartoons all over them.
She noticed him and walked towards him. "Hi Bugs!"
"Eh, what's up Sweetcheeks?"
Lola giggled. "Where are you going?"
"I'm waiting for that duck to get back with my car so we can go bowling," Bugs said.
"Can I come?" Lola asked eagerly.
They went across the street and sat on the benches in front of the bowling alley. Lola leaned against Bugs' shoulder.
"I swear if he hurts my car…"
"Calm down. How'd he get you to give It up anyway?" Lola asked. Daffy was the last person she'd expect Bugs to let borrow his car.
Bugs turned a little red. He was starting to feel a little stupid. "Michael Jackson."
Lola laughed and kissed him. Then she tapped him on the nose and said "Sucker!"
Bugs kissed her back. "I really am a sucker aren't I."
Lola giggled. "But you're my sucker!" She pulled his face towards hers for another kiss. Bugs put his arms around her waist and they kissed for a while.
Daffy drove up wearing Bugs' sunglasses and he had T.I.'s "Whatever You Like" blasted. He parked the car in front of the bowling alley. He noticed Bugs and Lola. He pushed Bugs' glasses down his nose. "You two are pathetic. Every time I turn around you're smoochin'. I'm getting really sick of your 'Bunny Love'. You are despicable."
Bugs and Lola scowled at him. Bugs rubbed Lola's cheek real quick and then walked over to Daffy. "What did you do to my car?!" Bugs demanded.
Daffy smiled and looked away from him. "Well what had happened was…"
At this point Bugs was now thinking of how much dynamite he should use and whether he should use bombs or landmines.
"Nothing," Daffy finished.
Bugs inspected his car. Nothing. He noticed Daffy had on his sunglasses. He snatched them off. "Give me those. Come on, the others are probably waiting."
Daffy stuck out his foot and tripped Bugs up. "Oops, my bad," he said innocently.
Bugs punched Daffy in the mouth and sent it spinning in circles. "You really need to get that thing screwed on tighter."
Daffy turned around. He held up his fists. "Put 'em up rabbit!"
Bugs was about to punch him again but Lola interrupted. "Break it up guys. You act like little kids."
"He started it!" Bugs said.
Okay, now they really sounded like three year olds. Lola tried to tune them out. Bugs and Daffy were sweethearts but in all honesty sometimes she felt like the mother. Hey, someone had to step in before one of them got blown up or thrown to the sharks.
Inside they claimed lanes 16 and 17. Daffy, Bugs, and Lola were on one team and Sylvester, Porky, and Wile E. were on the other.
"Who's ready for my super strike?" said Daffy. He spun around in circles and threw the ball. He ended up throwing it a little too hard and it bounced off the wall and came straight back at him. Daffy ducked before it hit him in the face but the soda machine behind them wasn't so lucky. It had a giant dent in it.
Daffy's mouth dropped. Everyone else laughed.
Wile E. was getting tired of losing so he got this rocket machine that was guaranteed to get you a strike every time you shot a ball out of it. It actually worked the last ten times.
"Maybe we should get one of those," Bugs said to Daffy and Lola.
But the next time Wile E. tried it instead of getting him a strike he ended up getting himself blown up.
"Never mind," Bugs said.
In the end, Lola, Bugs, and Daffy won with a score of 260-150.
They sat down to pizza and ice-cream and bragged. And they teased Daffy and Wile E.
They also played a few arcade games. Then they went home.
Daffy was sleeping over at Bugs' house so they dropped Lola off first. In the car they listened to "Beat It" which was Daffy's favorite, "Smooth Criminal" which was Bugs' favorite, and "Billie Jean" which was Lola's favorite.
"I'll walk you to the door," Bugs said when they got to her house.
"Last time I checked, Lola had two legs that aren't broken," Daffy said.
"Shut up, Duck," Bugs said.
"Don't spend three hours kissing her," Daffy said.
"Shut up, Duck," Bugs said.
"I'm serious. I'll leave you. Like you'd care though." He really wouldn't care though, Daffy thought. He'd just stay at Lola's house and sleep with her.
"You two are a trip," Lola said when they got to her front door. "Please try not to kill each other tonight," she said.
"Daffy wouldn't. He hasn't got any nerve," Bugs said.
Lola put her arms around his shoulders and kissed him. Kissing Bugs was like floating on a love cloud with just the two of them. She enjoyed every moment of it.
Back in the car, Daffy rolled his eyes. This would obviously take a while. He turned on "Dirty Little Secret." He opened the glove compartment and found Bugs photo album on top of a whole bunch of carrots. He flipped through the pages.
There were a ton of pictures of Space Jam, of course there were some of Lola, and there was even one of him and Bugs when they were little kids. Those were the days.
Daffy looked out the window. Bugs and Lola were still kissing. He honked the horn.
Bugs and Lola jumped. Bugs turned around and rolled his eyes. "He always has to ruin everything," he said.
Lola smiled. "Go have fun. I'll see you tomorrow." She gave him one last quick kiss.
Bugs smiled. "I love you."
"I love you too."
Bugs started to walk away.
"Call me," Lola said.
Bugs turned around. "You know I will." He got in the car and looked at Lola out the corners of his eyes.
Daffy snapped his fingers in Bugs' face. "Earth to Bugs!"
Daffy smiled. "Bunny Love."
"If you had a girl you'd feel the same way," Bugs said.
"Yeah, I guess."
Bugs turned on Michael Jackson's "Man in the Mirror."
Daffy laughed. "I remember when that guy died yesterday."
The day before they had both been at Daffy's house and the news was on.. Bugs was walking past the living room where the TV was. The lady had said "Michael Jackson died today at 6:00 of a heart attack."
Bugs had almost had a heart attack himself. "WHOA!" he'd yelled. He had held onto the wall for support. "You wanna run that by me again?"
"Michael Jackson died today at 6:00 of a heart attack," the lady said again.
Bugs had sat down. "OH MY GOD!"
Then Daffy came in. "What's going on? Why are you watching this?" He was about to turn off the TV.
Bugs ran over to him and pushed him away from the TV. "Shut up! Don't you dare touch that TV. The King of Pop just died like five minutes ago!!!"
"Wow!" Daffy had said.
Bugs laughed. "That's not funny Daffy!"
"Well you're the one that looked like you'd cry!"
They went on about this for a while. Then they ended up laughing about a whole bunch of things on the way home.