By Angelfirenze

Disclaimer: Schwartz and Whedon own all. I'm just borrowing them to have a little fun. *glances sideways and cackles*

Summary: He wondered what it was about him that apparently fascinated other people his age. Maybe he should ask or something.

Timeline: The OC, post - S1 and circa - 'The House Always Wins'. Somewhere in there.

Note: Usually I ship Seth with Anna and don't ship Connor with anyone at all, but branching out has been a passion of mine for a while now. I never did appreciate the age - bump, so I always make Connor seventeen or thereabouts in my stories. Never legal because that was such a cop-out in my view. Anyway, there's awkward and then there's Seth Cohen giving Connor Angel other lessons about nocturnal life. Yeah, I know. *grin*

Warnings: for the dorkiest, strangest way of getting to third base I could have probably come up with. *nods* Oh, and also, slash. That, too.

Enormous thanks to CaliforniaQuail for beta'ing this thing. *nods*

Somewhere North of Santa Monica Boulevard Where Weird Stuff Like This Seems to Happen All the Time

Seth wonders if it was really a good idea to follow the skinny, way better built (as if such a thing were even possible) guy home, after his boat washed ashore near what he vaguely recognized as L.A.

He wonders if Ryan and Theresa are alright, since he never got to sell his boat for them. He wonders how on earth his apparent Prince Not at All Charming, In Fact Touchy as Hell is managing the weight of his boat without so much as staggering. Though the view of the other young man's shoulder blades jutting out is pretty nice -- and whoa, are they nice -- Seth can't seem to remember exactly when he started thinking about guys in that particular way and when he gives it further consideration, he realizes that he doesn't care.

He's apparently been away from people so long now, that he's even started to babble in his head. And anyway, it's not like the -- damn he is hot -- kid is doing very much talking. He asked if Seth needed help, which should have been evident enough, being that he was more or less shipwrecked and all, after which he proceeded to gather the two pieces of Seth's now broken boat and haul them up over his head, walking off like it was nothing. Seth might or might not have remembered to close his mouth before beginning to follow him. But he's not so up on the details. He thinks it's possible that he hit his head at some point. Actually he had to have, because he's never once thought about any other guy this way. He usually chalks those wet dreams after gym class days up to youthful idiocy and somewhere out there he knows there's a girl who was born with a dick and maybe that means he's also attracted to transvestites, because they're girls on the inside, right? They were just born in the wrong body, which is obviously not their fault and if there's anything Seth can relate to, it's having been born wrong somehow.

He'd ask the hot guy if he's ever felt the same way, but he doubts it'd get him anything more than a sock in the jaw. The guy's built, after all, and obviously very strong and Seth has already injured at least one vital body part and doesn't need anything else added to the list.

Holy crap, what he does need to do is schtup. No, not schtup -- shut up. Yes, he's horny. Yes, he's Jewish. Yes, he'd probably hump one of his socks right now if it weren't filled with sea water. But what he needs most of all is some self -- control. He wonders if he can borrow some of that guy's, which he realizes would totally be giving Luke ammunition. But considering Luke himself has a gay dad who he is now living with, it'd hardly be appropriate for Luke to try to point that out. It probably wouldn't stop him for long, though.


Connor takes a deep breath and pauses to glance at the other boy he pulled out of the Pacific Ocean (he doesn't think he'll ever get over simply saying the name of's so new and different) and thinks he should probably be doing something to make sure he's alright. Fred, before she got angry with him for sending Dad to the bottom of the ocean the way Father had taught him to, had told him that most people didn't have the stamina he did and were more helpless after being injured than supernatural creatures like him (or Angel) and that it was nothing to look down upon or feel superior about. It was just the way things were. Besides, Gunn had noted before he started hating Connor for only doing what he'd been told since before he could think straight and how was he supposed to figure out how to trust anyone when all anyone here ever did was lie and call it 'social graces'?

Connor shook his head angrily. He'd almost forgotten what Gunn had told him once. That even as strong as Connor was (though not as strong yet as Angel) there was obviously a whole lot he didn't know and to mock others when he was deficient in different areas only made him look stupid not heroic and that humans often found their own ways to be impressive. So that's what he was trying to do now, be heroic in his own way that didn't involve lectures or lies. If this other boy didn't feel the need to know about him, then he didn't have to find anything out either so everything was fair and even.

He did wonder if it was at all odd that the way the other boy's water -- logged clothes clung to his frame appealed to him, though. He should probably at least ask the other boy's name. Fred said they did things like that here and called them 'pleasantries'.

It could wait until they were back at his place and he could put his back to the wall and relax a little.


Seth watched the hot kid pick his way through the tacos they'd stopped and bought after he'd told Hot Kid he was really hungry and could they please stop and he didn't beg, really, truly, he didn't.

Either way, that was in the past and Hot Kid was examining the tacos as though he'd only ever had a few and was still trying to figure out how to work them. Seth had never really stopped to think about it and neither had Ryan. Huh. That could be an interesting manual to write for people who'd never had Mexican food: The Ins and Outs of Tacos: How to Inhale Without Dropping by Seth Cohen. It had a nice ring to it.

He wiped his hands on his pants and started looking around the room. It seemed sparsely decorated, considering the fact that on the way up here they'd passed a mounted bear and Hot Kid remarked that he wished he'd been the one to kill it. Seth had found that...oddly sane, considering the way Hot Kid acted. He suddenly wished Hot Kid might hunt him, too.

Oh fantastic, more unintended innuendo. God, tonight was going to be a long one. And more after that...


Connor realized that the new boy was watching him eat. Sunny had done that too, he remembered. He wondered what it was about him that apparently fascinated other people his age. Maybe he should ask or something.


"You're watching me," Hot Kid said quietly. And Seth's eyes vaulted up from where they'd been looking, at his arms wrapped around his knees. Damn it. He thought he'd perfected the glance away with Summer. But apparently not.

"'s just..." Seth swallowed and forced himself to gesture toward the other boy. He was vainly hoping the erection he'd gotten pretty much the second Hot Kid took off his shirt to eat wasn't plainly visible. And really, who takes off their shirt to eat? He can understand the need not to get taco sauce on one's clothes. But this kid doesn't seem like the type to concern himself with such things and damn it, he's staring again. "You...well. You took off your shirt...I guess because you didn't want to get food on it and well, people really...don't do that, you know? Well, I mean..."

Seth started to fumble, feeling his cheeks burn. "Well, obviously, you don't or you wouldn't have done it but the point is -- is that I was watching you because you've taken off your shirt and, and you're really buff man, like really well-built and I'm not so it's different and...and..."

Seth grit his teeth, turning his head towards the open window nearby, trying to concentrate on anything else.

"And what?" Hot Kid asked. His breath warm and strangely nice and Seth jumped, because how the hell had he gotten so close so quickly without Seth even noticing? Fuck, fuck, fuck. Hot Kid could totally see Seth's hard-on now and was totally staring at him and there was no way he could explain it away in any matter approaching sane and...

Hot Kid's head tilted back a little, as he examined the tented crotch of Seth's pants. "I've seen that before. Outside...on men outside of dark places. I was told they're called bars. But that I can't go to them, because I'm seventeen and it's bad for people my...our age to drink."

Seth was staring at Hot Kid now, blinking and astonished that he could have possibly found someone else on the planet who was more oblivious - and whether he was aware of it or not -- dorky than he himself.

"I'm in love," he whispered and Hot Kid quickly glanced up.


Seth couldn't help but grin. "I said I'm in freaking love -- sort of. I mean, I run all the way from home because I knew there wasn't ever going to be anyone like me there and I shipwreck in L.A. of all places and actually manage to find a guy -- I mean someone who's more awkward than me? I..."

Seth clapped his mouth shut and took a deep breath. "I can't believe I'm about to..." He winced and gestured at his erection. "You've never had one of these before, like ever?"

Hot Kid seemed to be thinking it over. "I don't think so. Sometimes when I'm asleep something feels really good and then I wake up very sticky."

Seth snorted, his grin widening. "Uh, yeah. That's normal. That's totally even. This," he gestured to his erection again. "Would be why that happens."

"Oh," Hot Kid seemed to take it in stride.

"No one really ever explained that to you before?" Seth asked, completely in disbelief. Hot Kid shook his head.

Seth bit his lip. "Well, whatever. If you've never even done anything like this before or even seen it then there's no reason for me to be embarrassed or anything. I've only ever done it without anyone watching and then once with a girl. But we broke up and I ran away from home. So I'm probably never going to see her or anyone from school again anyway..."

Connor was looking at him in confusion.

"Sorry, I babble. It's a habit. Um...anyway."

Seth took a deep breath and lay his hand on his cock, almost failing to suppress the resulting moan. "Are you sure you don't mind?"

Connor shrugged and Seth laughed nervously. "You don't realize how crazy this is, do you? I mean, I don't even know your name and you don't know mine and..."

"Connor. It used to be Steven but, Connor." Connor had that pensive look on his face again. It sent a strange little thrill through Seth, who quickly decided not to bother hiding his reaction. It was obvious the kid didn't mind.

He felt kind of dirty, though. Like a...reverse voyeur or maybe some kind of peeping Tom. The other guy would have be participating somehow, or this wasn't going to work.

" Could you do me a favor and kind of...take yourself out here. It's really weird to be about to jerk off...uh masturbate, when the person in front of you isn't going to do the same."

Connor's eyes narrowed slightly, and then he tilted his head and shrugged. Without so much as blushing, he stood and removed his pants, immediately revealing his lack of underwear.

Seth felt his mouth fall open and seemed to have temporarily forgotten how to close it.

"Commando," he breathed, and his cock throbbed at the sight. Connor went about placing his pants on the back of a chair, inadvertently giving Seth a brilliant view of his ass.

Am I really going to just... Seth looked down and saw his own hand, already subconsciously moving along his shaft, caring not what the hell the rest of his body might be doing.

Connor walked forward and squatted, observing intently.

"Does that feel...good?"

"Um...uh, yeah. R-really good," Seth blinked, his mouth falling open again. Connor's hand came to rest on his and began moving in time with the strokes. His eyes slid completely shut, Connor watching him as he moaned again. "Oh, God." His other hand twitched and before he realized what was happening, he was touching flesh that wasn't his.

Seth's eyes flew back open to discover that Connor had placed his hand on his own cock and was continuing to watch him.

"Like this?" His voice was unsteady, now that his hand had automatically begun moving up and down the other boy's cock.

"Yeah, does that feel?"

"W-weird," Connor stuttered, his eyes now glued to both their penises. "Good."

"Good," Seth said. He leaned forward and placed his lips on Connor's, who immediately kissed back. Another electric shock went through Seth and his hands started moving faster. He worked his lips against Connor's and then pushed him onto his back.

Connor looked up at him in surprise and Seth smiled and explained. "You've been kissed before. So...that's good."

Connor nodded. Seth reached forward again, pressing him to the floor, pinning him there and grinding against him. One of Connor's hands landed in Seth's hair and he chuckled into Connor's mouth.

"Don't pull," he ordered in a muffled voice. "That's not everything's thing."

"What?" Connor asked, pulling away from him momentarily with a confused expression.

"Never mind," Seth negated, reclaiming Connor's bruised lips with his own. He untangled his hand from between Connor's leg and his and broke the kiss again. "I'm going to try something."

"Hmm," Connor mumbled, both his hands now busily roaming over the sides of Seth's face.

Seth repositioned himself along Connor's body and began to rub their penises together. He grinned satisfactorily when moments later, Connor cried out and came. Seth sat back to cup his own balls, quickly bringing himself off as well. He was thoroughly glad that Connor was in no position to mock whatever face he might have been making at that crucial moment.

Panting heavily, Seth leaned back against the wall and observed Connor's naked body. He smiled at Connor, who immediately smiled back.

"That was really good," Connor enthusiastically cheered and Seth could only grin lazily back.