Disclaimer: X-Men: Evolution doesn't belong to me and neither does 'Pirates of the Caribbean'. I know that this has been done several times already, so I don't pretend that this is an original idea, but it is something that I've always wanted to do and hopefully, it means I'll have something to update when I'm stuck with my other stories. So enjoy.
Prologue – Casting
"Remind me again why we're doing this?" Kitty asked, flipping through a script.
"Several reasons." Jean answered wearily. "First of all, it provides positive publicity for once. Secondly, it shows that we're human as well as mutant…"
"How?" Lance interrupted. "Because we can humiliate ourselves as well? Go on then," he prompted, when she only glared at him, "what's the third reason?"
"All proceeds will go to charity." Jean told him sweetly. "So is anyone backing out?"
"After that?" Bobby asked. "Like any of us are that heartless."
"Good." Jean smiled. "Now, casting: Kitty, you get to play Elizabeth."
"Yay." Kitty intoned.
"So Lance, of course, is Will." Jean continued. "And Pietro is Jack Sparrow."
"Ah, now that, I don't mind." Pietro admitted, taking the script.
"On that note, I thought it would be quite ironic if Evan was Barbossa." Jean smirked.
"What, so you're going to let Pietro kill me?!" Evan demanded. "After everything we've been through?!"
"I'm also letting you abandon him on an island." Jean reminded him. "Twice."
Evan thought about it. "Alright then."
"Now, Commodore Norrington…" Jean pulled a face as Lance and Kitty both looked up sharply at her. "Difficult one, this. I need someone who can act, which rules out most of the X-guys and someone Lance won't kill, which rules out everyone else except Bobby and Jamie. And, since Jamie's a tad too young, and will be playing young Will, Bobby's stuck with it, 'kay?"
Lance eyed Bobby, who swallowed nervously. "I can deal with that."
Bobby turned to Jubilee, who smiled reassuringly. "Don't worry about it, hun."
"Good." Jean cleared her throat. "Now, Paige, we'll have to dye your hair, but you'll be playing young Elizabeth. Scott, Governor Swann…don't give me that look; it's all that fits. Roberto, Ray, you're Pintell and Ragetti…Forge, do you think you can knock up a couple more image inducers?"
"I'll see what I can do." Forge promised.
"Thank you." Jean nodded. "Now, Logan, you'll be Mr. Gibbs; Lexa, Annamaria. Kurt, you're Lieutenant Gillette."
Kitty sniggered. "What were they thinking?"
"I don't know." Jean shrugged. "Sam, you can be Cotton. That's the pirate who doesn't speak. Forge, any chance of a robot parrot?"
"Absolutely." Forge responded, busying himself in his temporary lab.
"Oh, wait." Jean flipped through the script. "No, Sam, you're Murtogg and Alex is Mullroy. The sailors who won't let Jack near the boat." She added when they just stared at her. "So, Piotr, you'll have to be Cotton then. Now any volunteers for Scarlet and Giselle?"
"Who?" Rogue asked. "You mean the prostitutes in Tortuga? Who in their right mind would volunteer for that?"
"I'll do it." Tabby offered. "It means I get to slap Pietro."
"Oh, that's true." Rogue remembered. "Alright, I'm in too."
Pietro rolled his eyes. "Thanks."
"As for everyone else, mingle. And, Jamie, we'll be needing a few clones."
"Right." Jamie chirped happily.
"Excellent." Jean stated. "So can we do this?"
"We can do this!" Kitty responded. "But what are you?"
"I'm the director, of course." Jean sniffed. "What else would I be?"
"Oh of course." Rogue muttered. "How silly of us."
"Any questions?" Jean asked.
"Er, hang on." Kitty flipped through her script. "You're missing a few characters. What about the Bo'sun? And the bloke with dreadlocks? You know, the one who questions Barbossa's every move?"
Jean started and checked her clipboard. "Good Lord, you're right! Okay, Sarah (1), you can play the Bo'sun and the other one…" She gave up on the list and began scanning her team-mates, all of whom avoided her gaze. "Jubilee."
Jubilee sighed. "Oh, if I must. You do realise that people are going to have to double up with non-speaking parts, don't you?"
"Yes, of course." Jean waved her hand impatiently. "Off you run, everyone! Costumes and make-up."
Amanda sniggered. "They're going to hate you by the end of it."
"Remind me again why I've let you off?" Jean prompted.
Amanda pulled out a pot. "Because I brought you chocolate chip cookies."
"Oh yeah." Jean took one and pulled out a megaphone. "Okay, everyone; places! Oh, and Amara, you get to play Kitty's maid."
"Oh, wonderful." Amara rolled her eyes.
"It's nothing personal." Jean shrugged. "It's just that you're the only person here who knows how to lace up a corset."
Kitty stuck her head out of her dressing room. "Damn; I'd forgotten that! Are you sure the corset is necessary?"
"Look, it won't be that long." Jean told her. "Just stick the nightgown on and wait the first scene out."
"And there's another reason you left me out." Amanda commented as Jean dropped her head into her hands. "You need someone to help you stay sane."
AN: (1) For those of you who are reading 'Of Love and Life' you'll know who I mean; for those of you who aren't, Sarah Rushman (Marrow) was originally in the comics, wasn't in Evo and is Ray's best friend from his Morlock days.
Also this is sort of based in with my other stories, so the Brotherhood are living with the X-Men and they (mostly) get along, but it's not really necessary to read my other XME stories. Although it would be nice if you did *hint* *hint*.
Now that's said and done, review please, so I know how I'm doing!