Disclaimer: I do not own anything, nor am I writing this for profit. The characters belong to Miss Meyer. No copyright infringement is intended.
Authors Notes: This is my first Twilight fic and I'm not sure I should have started out with Alice's point of view. She is a rather difficult character for me to write and was maybe a bit too ambitious. Anyway, I guess you would have to call this a songfic, but it didn't start that way. Enjoy.
People were always describing me as bouncy, playful, or heaven forbid, chipper, and generally I have to agree with them. I really am a glass half-full kinda girl. I tend to go with the flow and speak my mind.
"And she's watching him with those eyes"
My fingers moved quickly over the threads in my hands faster than the human eye could follow. The orange and brown sweater was coming along nicely if I do say so myself. It would look wonderful with her eyes and coloring.
"And she's lovin' him with that body, I just know it."
I paused to turn up the small radio in my room. I loved this song. Even that pop cover wasn't so bad. You just can't kill a classic.
"Yeah 'n' he's holding her in his arms late, late at night"
I added my voice to the music as I knitted away the night-time hours. They didn't used to seem so long, but now that my latest obsession sleeps at least eight hours a day I was trying to find creative uses for my time. I don't do the whole sit and brood thing well. That was more Edward's or Jasper's thing. I was always the more, ugh, chipper one.
Of course lately I've had reasons for brooding. It's not everyday that you're in a position to break your little brother's heart - or that you want to so badly that you almost don't care if you do.
The knitting was also keeping me from making a decision. No decisions equals no premonitions and no un-happily ever after endings. Believe me; they're out there waiting to get you. One wrong decision and bam, everything's in ruins. I'm energetic and bubbly all the time because I can't afford not to be. It's better than crying all the time. If I could still cry that is. So yeah, on with the knitting.
"You know, I wish that I had Edward's girl"
I laughed to myself bitterly as I sang the words. They were true and I couldn't admit it to anyone. Any member of my family would have condemned me for coveting what was so clearly the love of my brother's life, and Edward did deserve to be happy. He'd been waiting so long, but dammit, why did it have to be Bella. Bella who called to me in a way no one ever had, even Jasper.
"I wish that I had Edward's girl!"
Everyone else was out hunting so I let myself go and almost screamed the words, letting the bass and guitar pulse around me.
But the truth was I would never have Bella, not the way I wanted. I would have a friend, and when Edward finally got around to changing her I would have another sister. I needed to forget Bella Swan and move on with my life - or life after death as it were. That was my decision and I would stick to it somehow.
"I want, I want Edward's girl"
My hands dropped into my lap with the yarn pooling at my feet as a vision filled my head. The next song on the radio was going to be "Letting Go" by Straight Lines.
"They say that if you
love somebody, you've got to set them free
And if you really love somebody, you've got to let them be"
I sighed and gathered my knitting. Slowly a small smile tugged at my lips as the opening strains of the 80's song filled the room. The next song was "I'll Be Waiting" by Lenny Kravitz after this ode to hopeless love. The DJ had just made up his mind.
"And the hardest part of love is letting go"
The sweater really was coming along nicely. It might even be done before she had to go to school. If not, when she comes home it'll be here waiting for her, just like me.