AN: Okay so for this story, im venting:) I started writing it on paper than my BFF read it and said to post it. So review and tell me what ya think:) Thanks.
Same ol' routine every single morning. Wake up early, take a cold shower cause the hot is always out, care for Maddie, cook breakfast for my father...thankfully he was absent this morning. He had left for work yesterday and hadn't come home. He said he had some 'late work'. Me and my older brother Jacob knew that was not the case. My mother Renee on the other hand believed every word that came from his mouth as if he could only speak the truth. His late night working never really consisted of working. He was always out with his secret girlfriend. I had met her only once when he brought her home when Renee wasn't here. My mother was always too doped up on meds to realize he was cheating. Jacob nor I had the courage to tell her. She's probably just yell at us for lying. She knew we didn't like our father much. Charlie had threatened us not to, Jacob could deafened himself when it came to my fathers neglect fullness. I on the other hand could not do much. I was about 103 pounds of skin and bones. I could never fight off Charlie when he was either drunk or angry. I had tried...didn't turn out too well. I knew now to save my energy. To not fight back. Because with the energy I had left, I had to use to defend Maddie. Charlie hadn't gone for her...yet. She was just a child. Only 6 years old. I couldn't bare the thought of Charlie beating on her. Id take a hit for her any day.
I pondered this as I watched her eat her cereal. I didn't bother eating myself. We didn't have much food to begin with. Mind as well save it. I sighed. I hadn't slept well in the last month. My fingers drummed absentmindedly against the counter tops. I would have to get going soon. I had to walk to school. Usually Jake drove me, but he was already gone. He had graduated last year. He was trying to keep a steady job, since my father wasn't much help with paying the piling stack of bills. Jake took it upon himself to be the true man in the house. Neither of us were a big fan of our father. He wasn't much of a father to begin with. But we both banned together to put up with him. My mom was still upstairs, sleeping off the pills she had taken last night. She wasn't much of a mother either. I was more of a mother figure to Maddie than she was.
I couldn't put it off much longer. I kissed Maddie's forehead, saying a quick goodbye. I stole a glance at myself in the hallway mirror. I grimaced. Not much I could do with the limp and lifeless hair that hung over my shoulders. The dark blue sweatshirt was nothing but ordinary as well. It hung baggy off my form. A hand me down from Jake. Plain blue jeans and my lucky pair of old ratted converse. Nothing about me popped. Nothing about me was special. With a huff I swung my back pack over my shoulder and walked out into the light drizzle. I pulled my hoodie up and continued my 2 mile walk to school. I didn't look back at the old house I called my home. It was run down and out of place. The neighborhood wasn't the best either. Alot of the time, we go without electricity...or water. Hence the reason for Jake's job.
I was almost to school now. Hm. Forks High. What could I say about this school? Alot of snobs ruled over everyone else. Not even alot of kids came here. We were a small town. I guess you could say I was a outcast. I was pretty much on my own here. You wouldn't even believe the rumors I had heard about myself. I got to school with seconds to spare. I got to first period. I was last to enter, I could feel eyes on me...I paid them no attention. I especially ignored the amused stares of Jessica and Lauren. The schools biggest whores you could say. They didn't like me for some reason, the feeling was mutual. They had pointed out things so inconsequential...It was ridiculous. I kept my cool though. I had never cared what people thought of me. So when a snarky comment escaped the lips from none other than the devil herself I did nothing but smile.
"Guess Goodwill had another big sale. Looks like Swan cleaned the place out." Jess laughed. A few people around her chuckled lightly. I just kept walking and took my seat in the back. Alone.
Maybe it was just me but 1st period always droned on longer than necessary. I was more than happy when the bell rang. I got out quick enough to escape another comment from the snob squad. My next 3 classes werent as long. They were just boring. Lunch was the same as every other day. I sat isolated from everyone else with my tattered copy of Wuthering Heights. I never ate at lunch. One, because I didn't have the money to pay for over pricey food that made me want to gag. And secondly, I was use to not eating on a regular basis. It didnt bother me...not eating. I was dreading next period though....I had Biology, but I sat next to none other than Jessica Stanley herself. I sighed aggravated when the bell for next period rang. I walked slowly to 6th period. Considering ditching. But rethought when I thought of how mad Charlie would be. I didn't speak as I sat down. Jess came in last and moved her seat far from mine.
"Jeeze Bella....shower much?" She laughed and sat down. Obviously proud of her joke.
"I bet it took you all lunch period to come up with that huh Jess?" I smirked. She glowered at me. I became amused with her expression. "Lets see. How does a blonde's brain cell die?" I asked honestly. She kept scowling. I laughed once. "Alone." I finally whispered. She scoffed and flipped her hair and looked at the board. I smiled. Lets see her reply after a come back like that. After about 2 minutes. She whispered back.
"I cant help it you have no life Swan." She growled. Was this the best she could come up with?
"And you do?" I laughed. Once again she said nothing.
By the end of the day, I was exhausted and dreaded walking home. But I managed. Maddie was happy to see me. She clung to my knees. Hugging me. She had already gotten home from kindergarden.
"I missed you Bellss." She sighed.
"Hey kido." I picked her up and placed her on my hip. I knew Charlie was home. Jake wasn't though. I walked into the kitchen, Charlie was angrily eating a bowl of dry cereal.
"Hey dad." I sighed.
"Where in the hell have you been?" He growled. I set Maddie back down on the floor She fled to the living room.
"I had to walk home." I reminded him. He scowled at me, then set his unappetizing bowl of cereal on the counter. He approached me.
"Don't talk back to me." He growled. "Why isn't dinner done?"
"We have no groceries." I said. He pinched the bridge of his nose.
"What did I say about talking back?" He asked.
"You asked me a question." I scoffed.
Before I could really comprehend what had happend. A hand whipped across my cheek. I knew from experience that crying out in pain didn't help. I never shed a tear. I had to be strong, for Maddie especially. I stared absently at his bowl of forgotten corn flakes. Waiting for the pain to stop. They did momentarily. I focused back into reality. Bad idea. I felt my legs being shoved from underneath me. More pain. I felt pain, the numbness, then more pain. I felt myself begin to black out. I almost welcomed it. Anything was better than this. I could smell the rust and salt from the blood. My blood. It ran down my neck, than down my back. It overwhelmed me. Then I was out.
I wasn't sure if I was dreaming...or even alive for that matter. I stood in a beautiful meadow. It was green with wild flowers. But I was alone. And that's what scared me the most. Being alone. After what felt like a life time of this dream. A shadow emerged from the woods. It was blurred and unrecognizable. It beckoned me to come to it. I knew then I was dreaming. I could feel Maddie's small palm curving to my cheek. I was intrigued by this strange dream. I wanted to go to the shadow. But slowly i focused back into reality. I had to wake up...for Maddie. I let my eyes crack open. I saw her worried expression staring down at me. Then she sighed with relief.
"Oh sissy." She gushed. She wrapped her arms around my neck. The motion caused me to wince in pain. She didn't notice. I knew I wasn't on the kitchen floor anymore. I was in a Maddie and I's room. Laying on my bed. How had I gotten here? I sat up, wincing.
"How did I get up here?" I asked dazed. She frowned.
"Daddy hurt you pretty bad. Jake carried you up here. He even bandaged your arm for you. See." She motioned to my right hand. It was wrapped up. I flexed it a bit. Yep. Definitely sprained. Must have happened when I caught my fall. I looked at the clock. It read 5am. I had slept through the whole night. I stood up, cracking my back. I couldn't find a part of my body that didn't hurt. I walked to my bathroom. I scowled at the girl in the mirror. I had a bruise forming on my cheek. I could hide it with cover up. My neck had a few bad cuts. I could hide those too. Ugh...I didn't even want to think about what my back looked like.
I took a quick shower. I didnt have much time. I had to walk again. I put a pair of jeans on with a white tank top. I added my blue hoodie ontop . Slipped my shoes on and went back to the bathroom. I yanked a brush through my hair and then brushed my teeth. I added my cover up last. I headed downstairs.
Jake was there on the couch with Maddie. He gave me a apologetic smile.
"Thanks Jake." I held up my wrist. He frowned then.
"It looked worse last night." He grumbled.
"Wheres dad?" I asked confused. He would have been yelling by now.
"He left last night. He and mom got into it. So he left. Thank god." He growled.
At least he was gone. For now. I looked back at the clock. I was gonna be late if I didn't head out now. Jake noticed.
"I could drive you." He offered.
"No. its okay. Save your gas." I insisted.
"Its fine Bells. I got payed yesterday." I sighed but nodded. He grabbed his keys and off we went.
I got to school on time today. That's a first. I went to my locker and grabbed my Spanish book. I was glad I hadn't seen Jess or Lauren. By second period the only thing anyone talked about were the five new kids that came today. I didn't know for sure, I hadn't seen them yet. I never would understand why people made such a big deal about new kids. They are all just like us. I pondered this as I headed to lunch. I had to admit...I was starving. But I didn't let it get to me. I sat down at the usual table and pulled out my book. I was just getting to the part when Heathcliff returns when I heard a sing song voice next to me.
"Hi. Im Alice. Do you mind if we sit here?" She asked. I looked up to see the girl named Alice. To say she was beautiful was a understatement. Her hand was gestured to what looked like her family. I gawked for a moment before answering.
"Y-yeah sure. Here I'll go." I proceeded to stand up to leave but her tiny hand captured my wrist.
"Nonsense. Stay and eat with us. We haven't really met anyone yet." She laughed. She eyed the empty space in front of me where my food should have been. "Whats your name?" She asked. They all sat down.
"B-Bella Swan." I stammered.
"Its nice to meet you. This is my boyfriend Jasper. His sister Rose. Her boyfriend Emmett. And that's my lame brother Edward." They all smiled at me. I didn't meet eye contact, but smiled back. It was strange. They were pleased to meet me. A outsider. I could feel the stares burning through my table. People were obviously making talk about this. Sitting here as they ate became a bit awkward and I excused myself.
"Really Alice. I need to catch up on some homework. I'll see you around." I offered. I stood up.
"Yeah definitely. See ya Bella." I smiled and walked out.
I walked down to the library. I came here alot when I didn't want to sit in a over crowded lunch room. Or I wanted to read in silence.
When the bell for Biology rang I was disappointed. I wanted to read more. I trudged off to class anyway. I was pleased to see the teacher had separated Jess and I. It didn't stop her from making a comment from across the room.
"You know Bella. You should really get a life." This was getting old. She used that one on me every day.
"Go work a street corner." I replied back. That shut her up.
I sat down, resting my notebook and book on my desk. I rested my head in my hands exhausted. I heard a few gasps and giggles and a low murmur.
"Please take a seat next to Ms. Swan." I didn't look up. I knew it was one of the new kids. I just prayed it wasn't Alice. The lecture began as the seat next to me moved.
"Bella....right?" I heard a velvety voice ask from beside me. I looked up to see who it was. My eyes locked with his green ones. I didn't even turn from embarrassment. I kept staring. His mouth turned into a sheepish grin. "Uhh...." I was at loss for words. This guy had taken my voice. I hadn't paid attention to him at lunch because I was trying to escape his nutty sister. "Y-yeah." I stuttered. He smiled.
"Im Edward. I believe I met you earlier." I just nodded. Embarassed. I realized I had to look away. I quickly turned my gaze back to the front.
I hid my face with my hair. I once in a while stole quick glances at him during the hour. I almost sighed with relief when the bell rang.
"Wuthering Heights?" He asked out of no where. I turned to him. He was eyeing me. I shrugged. He laughed then. "Good book. Classic." I smiled. This guy liked books. Something I adored.
I was still shocked that I grabbed my backpack with the wrong hand. I gasped quietly and winced. I traded hands and began packing. I realized I had attracted a audience. Edward eyes me curiously.
"What happened to your wrist?" He asked concerned. What do I tell him? I couldn't tell him. But I didn't want to lie. I was bad at lying.
"Oh...I um...tripped. I caught myself though. I'm kinda a klutz." I rambled. My cheeks blazed. He seemed to of bought it. At least half of it was true.
I waved it off like it was un important. It would have passed smoothly if Jess hadnt of made a bad remark.
"She hurt it from all those hand jobs. I'd stay away from her Eddie. Who knows what diseases she has." She laughed. My cheeks flamed even more. I glowered at her than quickly escaped the room. Leaving Edward behind. I was maybe halfway down the hall when I heard a voice. "Bella!" I walked even faster. I got to my locker. I never bothered locking it. Why would someone steal from a person who didn't have anything? I kept my eyes in my locker, getting my final book for the day.
"Bella...Im...sorry." Edward said when he approached me. I scoffed and slammed my door shut. I stared at him confused.
"Why are you sorry?" I asked.
"I shouldn't have been so nosy." He replied back sheepishly. I had startled him when I laughed.
"Its fine. Shes always like that." I assured him. He grinned slightly.
"Like what? A.....bitch?" He asked. I couldn't help the laugh that escaped my lips. It had been so long since I had laughed. I hadn't realized till the warning bell rang that we were going to be late.
"Shouldnt be late on your first day." I sighed. He laughed.
"I'll just blame it on you." He sneered lightly.
In this moment, I felt something. I had never felt before. Whether it was from my lack of inability to think or the lack of food intake. My stomach and mind were comforted with a warm feeling. A feeling I only assumed was friendship. It felt nice. I liked the feeling it brought myself. It was taken away though when he turned back to make it back in time for class. He had taken my happiness with him. For now.
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