I do to own The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, Doctor Who or any of their associate characters or fictional locations.
Its difficult describing how I felt at that moment, indeed I had very little in the way of knowing exactly where I ended the TARDIS began, however what I can say is this. At that moment I suffered the most heart wrenching despair I have ever experienced. It was like somebody had torn my soul out and burnt it over flames of hell, like I had stolen fire from Olympus and I was doomed to feel my liver ripped from my body day after day for the rest of eternity, a thousand words would not be justice to the depths of the emotion with I sank to in those moments, it was the despair of the most powerful thing in the universe at having lost its lifelong partner, its... pilot for lack of a better term and its most beloved friend.
The TARDIS was weeping, for The Doctor was no where to be found.
It was snippet of knowledge that I found at the heart of TARDIS's despair, this knowledge that shocked me to the core, allowing me to reclaim my own consciousness, or something like it, from the heart of the TARDIS. I was still connected, too much so in fact, because I was still within the TARDIS as opposed to my own body, or perhaps I was within my own body and the TARDIS was overriding those little sparks that paint the picture of reality for that lump of neurons we call a brain, either way I was once again myself I and I forced myself away from the TARDIS's soul-chilling wails that were threatening to drown me once again.
I forced my mind into action, the TARDIS is in despair... the cause of that despair is that that TARDIS has lost connection with The Doctor...I would have felt the blood drain from my face if I had one at that point, as things were I was nothing but a raw consciousness within the heart of the TARDIS. The Doctor couldn't have lost connection with the TARDIS! It was impossible, the only way would be if he had left the current time plane, and he had no other time travel devices on him, and even then the TARDIS would know that he was still alive. The TARDIS would never be propelled into such despair unless.... The Doctor was dead.
At that moment I was sent under by the screams of the TARDIS, her agony sent into even greater depths by conclusion, only this time I felt myself being tugged along. The Doctor can't be dead! I refuse to believe it!I raged against the heart of the TARDIS, against the idea that my closest friend was dead, forcing myself away once more with the strength of my anger, the anger that was the only thing stopping me from joining the TARDIS in her despair, her grief cascading through our linked souls.
I understood now why the TARDIS had reached out to me, The Doctor was gone, or at least the TARDIS could no longer sense him so she had sought out the next best thing: me. I was perhaps the only companion of The Doctor's who had stayed with him so long, a decade of travel through the universe and beyond, and I was the only one besides The Doctor whose link with the TARDIS had grown so strong, at least, the only human at any rate. The TARDIS had reacted as a child, seeking out a parent for comfort against the night, and I was the only one who could answer.
So I consoled, I sent the TARDIS what comfort I could, I... 'communicated' though our link that The Doctor could not be dead, the I would bring him back, even as I felt the doubt gnawing away, and so the TARDIS calmed, the black despair washed away by the light of hope that I bore.
I don't know when I came to, for a time I lost all sense of reality and just lay there, on the concrete floor of the UNIT base, my sense still spinning from being so closely linked to the TARDIS. I know understood why The Doctor was always treating it- her like she was incalculably valuable, like she was worth the world, no the universe to him, it was because she was. There is no way to describe the privilege I felt to be linked to her now, but I suppose it was closes to how a parent would feel holding a newborn child, or an artist seeing their life's work finally completed only to become so attached that they would never be able share it with any but those closest to them. At any rate our link had increased, like the TARDIS had accepted me into it's little family consisting of only The Doctor and the few Time Lords who had owned her before him. I could now feel the TARDIS's consciousness behind... within my own, her alien mind merging into my own like a river merging with the sea.
Something else had changed too, it's difficult, but not impossible to define. Imagine the world being covered by a thin fog, now imagine that at places and times that fog would solidify to ice while at others it would shift faster than one could comprehend it, that's what I felt now, all around me, wrapping around and through the UNIT instruments and swirling chaotically around me. I would later come to understand that this is what The Doctor had used to tell what he could change in history and what he could not, a 'time sense' if you will, the 'fog' being the the importance of the object or person it wrapped around to the time-line, not that I was seeing it with my eyes of course, my vision remained the same. I was seeing it in the same way I could feel the TARDIS within me, like a shifting pressure around me. It was another sense altogether, one only those who were linked with the TARDIS would ever feel.
"Sir!" A shout snapped me from my daze on the floor. I looked upwards to see a UNIT soldier standing before me, his rifle unholstered, just a quick question here: if only the police and military in Japan are legally allowed to have firearms then how come UNIT seems to have them by the bucket load? I bet they smuggled them in, UNIT just loves their guns too much to let something as small as national law get their way, and I've yet to see a UNIT soldier who didn't sleep with some kind of automatic weaponry under the pillow. Probably something to do with having 'more dakka' than the other side, 'dakka' meaning stupidly big guns and insane amounts of bullets for those of you whose vocabulary hasn't yet been mutilated by the Internet.
Okay, now that the ranting about UNIT's over let's get back to the story shall we? "No need to yell so loud!" I sanpped back at the soldier who jerked back in shock, by the looks of things he probably thought I was dead, for some reason whenever something goes wrong people always assume that I've kicked the bucket.
"S-sorry Sir." Said the soldier jerkingback up. "You were just lying there and I assumed the worst." See what I mean?
"Well I'm alive..." I said as I gotgroggily to my feet. "... I just feel down, nothing to get excited about." I couldn't tell UNIT that The Doctor was missing or they'd freak out, just like the time The Doctor accidentally swallowed half a pill of aspirin and fell into a coma for week while I was stuck trying to organise UNIT into a fighting force capable of taking on a Sontarin battle fleet.
"Of course Sir." The soldier re-holstered his gun. "Any progress Sir?"
"Progress Sir..." the soldier backed off, slightly wary of me. "I was sent down to see if you or The Doctor have made any progress as to what kind of weaponswe can use against this threat The Doctor found, speak of whom..." the soldier looked around. "Where is he?"
I thought quickly. "The Doctor's gone out to shut down one of their operations, he should be back soon.." there, I'm nottechnically lying, he did go out to shut down one their operations and if I had my way my friend would soon be lapping up the admiration of the UNIT forces once again. "As for weapons, I managed to find something that should help us but I'll have to go out of the base to get them." Okay, now that was a lie, I was just trying to get out the base so I could get some help to find out just what the hell had happened to The Doctor.
The soldier looked at me impassively. "We could get them for you Sir, just tell us where to go and-"
"No!" I shouted, like hell I'm going to let UNITnear who I was thinking of, the only time UNIT actually went anywhere without igniting some kind of interplanetary incident was when they were lead by sane people, and if you've had any experience with UNIT you'll know that they're even further down that scale than the first crew of Torchwood three! The only time they were of any use was when Brigadier Lethbridge-Steward was calling the shots, and even then they were trigger-happy to say the least. "No," I repeated. "Only I and The Doctor are allowed to access these weapons, if you lottry to use them you could start an even bigger mess than this one."
"I see..." The soldier looked at me skeptically.
I sighed. "Look, just trust me on this: I'm The Doctor's friend, I've been to hell and back more times than I want to remember, I know what I'm doing, besides if The Doctor trusts me then how can I not be on your side?"
The soldier mulled it over. "... As you say Sir. Please return as soon as possible Sir." He saluted and walked out of the door, presumably to inform his superiors that The Doctor was on the move. I stood there for a few minutes, still adjusting to the TARDIS within my mind, before returning to the UNIT scanner to find out exactly where the TARDIS was.
Koizumi barley contained a groan of fatigue as he eased himself into his chair, his body still aching from the battle with the celetials earlier in the morning.
Mikurulooked over to him with concern,"a-are you okay Koizumi-kun?"
Koizumi'sfake smile plastered itself across his face. "Of course Asahina-san, it's just that the celestialshave been more active lately..."
"But Suzumiya-san has been happy for the past few weeks, w-why would therebe closed spaces appearing now?" Asked the emotionally fragile time-traveller, her nerves already tested by the reappearance of Kyon, an event that was never recorded by the time agency, and the dire warning he had delivered.
"I am certain that there is nothing upsetting Suzumiya-san herself, but it is entirely possible that the celestials are reacting to whatever has forced Kyon to reappearin our lives." Said Koizumi, his fake smile betraying no sign of anxietyor discomfort. "It is obvious from his aged appearance that he has been travelling for a great deal of time, if he missed us then he surely would have visited us within the first couple of months after his departure, there would be no reason for him to return now. Then there is his explanation, that he has been travelling with The Doctor, and we all know what kind of things he has done. If this is true-"
"It is the correct hypothesis." Stated Nagotoquietly. "Huon particles are impossible to manufacture without Time Lord technology, or an imitation of it, and the only location where they occurred naturally was Gallifriey, in all cases the only remaining example of each in the universe is the Time and Relative Dimensions in Space type forty time travel capsule owned by The Doctor. In addition to that the only method in which Huon particles may enter a human being's bio-data without damage over a period of time exceeding four hundred day is if those Huon particles are placed there as the linking point of a human and a TARDIS. There can be no other explanation as Kyon's bio-data contained Huon particlesfrom ten years in his past."
".. Well, in any case if Kyon is currently traveling with The Doctor that means that something has occurred that The Doctor himself is required to rectify. It is entirely possible that the celestials are signs that Haurhi's subconscioushave noticed what is happening and is troubled by it." Koizumi suddenly lentbackward in a show of nonchalance. "In any case it should all clear up soon enough, The Doctor has never lost after all and once the threat is dealt with I should imagine that both he and Kyon will be off once more and the celetialswill return to their normal state of being once again."
Mikuru nodded and served him one the cups of tea she carried, reassured that Koizumi was alright. A few minutes later Haruhi Suzumiya came crashing through the clubroom door, holding yet another costume for the poor time-traveller to wear.
It took over sixteen hours to find the TARDIS from the data I managed to piece together from the second-class UNIT scanners, counting the time I had to sleep during. She had landed outside of an old abandoned warehouse in a dingy street, complete with rust-stained concrete from years of neglect, the TARDIS's dark blue exterior clashing with the orange walls behind her. I absently stroked the wooden door for a moment before I caught myself in horror, dammit! I need to start spending more time around sane people!I quickly put it out of my mind, unlocked the TARDIS door and walked over to the console.
I can't actually pilot the TARDIS and even if I could I doubt The Doctor would let me, the most I can do is activate off pre-set options with certain input codes. The first thing I did was attempt to activate the emergency return sequence, the only thing it succeeded in doing was cause the TARDIS to lurch for a few moments before slamming back down into the early twenty-first century. Well, it's not I expected that to work anyway, if the TARDIS actually knew where The Doctor was the chances were she wouldn't have contacted me. I next tried to perform a bio-data scan on the nearby area for signs of The Doctor's bio-data signature, however the results were negative.
I left the TARDIS scanning a wider area, not that I expected it to find anything and frankly I didn't want it to. If the TARDIS found The Doctor by his bio-data that would mean that he would be dead, as I mentioned before there are only two ways for The Doctor bond with the TARDIS to be broken, either he was dead or he was out of this time-plane. Finding bio-data without his mind would meant that we would have found his body, and only his body.
At any rate I now had time to think, namely about what could have happened to The Doctor. I mean he was The Doctor, a mere gunshot wouldn't have been able to kill him and anything with advanced enough technology to kill a Time Lord outright would doubtlessly know about his reputation and the numerous bounties there were on his head, there was no reason why they would kill him. If he had been shot however his connection to the TARDIS would not have broken, even if he had regenerated. The only way he could have lost his connection was if he had been forced to leave the current time plane, which the enemy was perfectly capable of doing but they were hardly the only ones capable of doing that, the DITE may have taken him in for study for all I knew.
Then again it was entirely possible that he had just fell through some kind of temporal flux again, its not llike that's never happened before.
At any rate I had to consider the possibility that The Doctor wouldn't be able to take care of this problem, meaning that I would have to do it by myself. I wasn't exactly looking forward to the prospect of taking on the Daleks on my own.