In case of emergency, should you find yourself out of breath (in case the "drama" is to much) there are EMTs standing by ( but they look suspiciously like Sam and Dean) and they are fully capable in the art of CPR.
Disclaimer:Use this story as the reason why Erik Kripke won't let me own them.
A/NToday Real Life cornered me in an ally, beat me up, took my wallet and then I woke up in a cheap motel in a bathtub full of ice. Fuck Real Life. It stole my goddamn kidney. So sorry the update is late. Does anyone have a spare kidney or metacarpal?
A/N *CRIES* I can't believe it's over ... *cries more* ... review if you want an epilouge snippet....
Chapter Thirteen: Jim Beaver Tweets and Other Online Adventures
Sam awoke hours later. He sat up and yawned. "Dean? I just had the most fantastic dream…"
Dean looked up from the neighboring twin bed and smiled, "Clowns or midgets?"
Sam stretched is weary joints and smiled. "Neither, there was a hoard of girls… I remember one was Clara…"
Dean got up, retrieved a brownie and glass of milk from the kitchen and walked over to Sam. "Sam, that wasn't a dream. They called themselves Samazons. They were your fangirls and they saved your life."
Sam nearly choked on the bite of brownie he was eating. "What?!"
In excruciating detail, which Sam continually interrupted, Dean explained what had happened during the 53 hour ordeal. Sam ate almost the entire pan of brownies. At the end he stood up and stretched, "Well, I guess the case got done."
"Yeah," Dean scratched his head, "but we'll be back later. Wisconsin always manages to get haunted."
"And they don't even have decent cheese," Sam grumbled.
"Well, I guesses we better get ready to pack up," Dean said sadly. He picked up the brownie pan and walked over to the kitchen so he could wash it.
Sam picked up the laptop, "Alright, but let me check my email first."
A few clicks later Sam landed on a website called fiction for the fans dot net. One story in particular caught his eye:
A Harrowing Tale of Great Angst and Seriousnessby FateTwistingDeanGurl and loverOf Sam'sPecks09
Thx to are beta: Frannie84
It wuz a normal dai in the universe that okupied Sam (squee) and Dean (omigod) Winchester. Their was war brewin up in the kosmos between angels and demins.
Sam gagged. "Dean, Dean, oh my god," he started to hyperventilate."Dean!"
Dean dropped what he was doing and rushed to his side. "What?"
With a shaking hand, Sam pointed at the screen. "They published it," he said in a horrified whisper.
Dean looked at the chapters long epic that detailed the horrific past few days.
Dean gave an itty-bitty bark and Sam knew without any logikal pruf that this was his Dean who he loved (as a bruther, Erica, gawd.)
As Sam moved through the chapters, he stumbled on something Dean didn't expect:
Casstile slapped on his moustache and smiled eevily and sexilly. (Becca that's freaking hawt) He walked in to tehbowels (giggle) of hell to save Dean (finally).
"Sam! Don't read that! You wouldn't understand!"
Sam read about the torture and gasped. "Dean, how dare you- I'm your brother. You're here for me; I'll be there for you."
Sam hugged him tightly. "I'm sorry, you had to go through that."
Dean let one lone tear slip down his cheek. "Thank you Sam. Let's end this now."
They pulled apart and stared at the offending website. Then they did the most powerful thing anyone could do.
"Wait, wait, what covert names can we use?" Dean said starring at the anonymous review page.
"We could be Jensen and Jared. You be Jensen. Jared's always been my dream name."
Dean looked at him. "Ok-ay. …That works for me."
o-o-o-o-Alright, now the author can switch scenes-o-o-o-o-o
"Rebecca! Rebecca!" Erica clapped her hands.
"What! What!" Rebecca ran over to where she sat by the computer.
"We got two new reviews!"
"So we got four reviews total? But that means…"
"That's the most reviews we've ever gotten on a story!!"
They both screamed excitedly, and clicked to see what they said:
Jensens_Pecs: Omg, WTF. A beagle? Why couldn't I have been something masculine like a Rottweiler? BTW, Mercedes. Best. Kiss. Ever.
Jared_Just_Joking: Roscoe's soooo cute! OMG. TAP SUX 4EVA!!! Thx ladies, talk to you later.
Rebecca furrowed on eyebrow. "Some reviewers are just weird."
Erica looked at the names as recognition tried to trickle in. She gave up, and assumed that the reviewers were complete strangers. "Maybe we should we should get offline today."
"Or we could go write for a drabble challenge," Rebecca said contemplatively.
They high-fived each other and began writing some relaxing stories.
Sam and Dean, still mildly terrified from the whole ordeal decided to spend on more night in the motel, reluctantly. Dean didn't mind too much, he wanted Sam to rest a little more. He looked over at his brother in the neighboring bed. Sam had fallen asleep merely minuets ago as his adrenaline had faded.
Dean sighed. Good, it was safe then.
He reached under his pillow and withdrew the tattered journal with the broken blue crayon tapped on the cover.
Dear Diary, he wrote, you wouldn't believe what happened today.
Between the long entries of an abused psyche was also tattered poems scattered.
I wear my heart
Upon my sleeve
I wish that you
Would never leave.
Dean smiled as he wrote away. He loved poetry.
THANKS TO EVERYONE THAT REVIEWED AND GAVE ME SUPPORT! THIS IS THE BEST THING I'VE EVER WRITTEN! It's got the most alerts, most words, and most reviews (but not the most faves for some reason) I love you all, thanks for participating !
For More TAP fun, if you feel any desire to write it (shudder):
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