Hello, I'm Bella Swan and I hate men.
There. I said it.
It's out in the open now.
I'm no lesbian. I've never been one for the fur burger… I don't sport two inch pit hair or burn bras either.
But I digress.
I was one of the lucky ones I guess. I didn't have to go through months and months of therapy to pinpoint the exact moment when this hatred entered my being.
I'm pretty sure the exact moment said hatred was born was when I walked into my apartment one day to find Jacob Black, boyfriend of three years, plowing into my best friend doggie style.
Nothing like a quilt made by Nana covered in cheating asswipe spunk.
Jacob Black. That alone is good enough a reason. Not to mention my father leaving my mother when I was three. Let's forget about the countless-well sixteen actually- men who broke my mothers heart when they would sneak out at the crack of dawn after a one night stand, one of them who felt the need to rob us blind. I tend to surpress memories of Mr. Bosse the pervy English teacher who had trouble resisting the urge to keep his fucking hands to himself. Not that he got very far before I kicked him in the groin like a donkey on steroids.
And I'm sure we can forgive the horny high school boys who knew their way around my vagina like a white guy knows his way around Detroit.
Once again, I digress.
But it's time to move on. To get out of Phoenix, the town that has harvested the crop for some of the worst years of my life.
I'm 23, a strong, independent, intelligent woman.
I'm moving to L.A to live with my best friends, Alice Cullen and Rosalie Hale.
That's where I will be opening my own art studio, Bella Artiste.
And this is a good idea.