Story: Extraordinary Machine
Chapter: Two Birds With One Stone
Pairings: Jimmy/Cindy, Libby/Sheen, implied Nick/Cindy
Summary: In order to get the girl, Jimmy concocts a plan. He needs to be extraordinary, so he enlists Marcus Nevins and his two best friends to help him. But along the way, he learns that there is more to it than that.
Disclaimer: I don't own Jimmy Neutron or AstroTurf. But I sure as hell own Marcus Nevins.
Notes: this story is ALTERNATE UNIVERSE. Jimmy and Cindy are neighbors but they aren't enemies/friends/secret lovers. You'll see when you read.
Also, this will probably be short. I'm expecting like, five chapters? Hopefully, they'll be long. The longer the chapters, the shorter the story.
I don't know why, but I made the characters really OOC. I guess it's because it's an AU story? But Sheen is smarter, Carl is more sarcastic, Jimmy is more serious, Cindy is more mysterious, but Libby is mostly the same.
So…no reviews saying how weird my story is, got it? Please and thank you!
Jimmy Neutron was seventeen years old, and he was a genius. He thought that he had a simple life, with parents, two best friends, and robot dog. He went to school and did his homework, slept and ate like regular teenagers. He had a neighbor…a really hot neighbor. She was the typical girl-next-door type; pretty and perfect and popular. Although Jimmy didn't consider himself unpopular or ugly, he didn't think he had a chance with a girl like her. That kind of girl went after guys like…football players or macho college guys. You know the type. But he did watch her from afar, sometimes spying on her – but not in a perverted way, of course. He was raised better than that. Over time, Jimmy even felt like he had feelings for this girl, and it freaked him out a little.
Yes, despite the capacity of knowledge his brain held, Jimmy Neutron was just a normal guy. And there was nothing wrong with that.
"I just don't like normal guys," Cindy Vortex said, shrugging.
Libby Folfax rolled her eyes and leaned back on her elbows. "You are just too picky. Your standards are much too high! You'll never find anyone that way."
They were currently sitting in Cindy's bedroom, and of course, they didn't know that they were being spied on.
It was all Sheen's idea, really. He was "bored" and he wanted something "exciting" and "fun" to do. Jimmy just found this all to be very troublesome. Carl didn't really have much say in anything, even though he didn't want to go along at all.
"You hear that, Jimmy? Cindy said she doesn't like normal guys," Sheen poked him in the side. He winced.
"I'm right here, I'm not deaf," He complained, poking Sheen in the chest. Before a poking war was started, Cindy spoke again.
"Okay, I'll have to admit that there really isn't such a thing as normal. But…any guy I choose has to be different, you know? I don't want the quarterback on the football team or the smartest kid in math class. Can't I have something extraordinary?" Cindy lay on her back, arms behind her head. She stared thoughtfully at the ceiling.
Libby sat up and stared at her intensely. "The quarterback on the football team or the smartest kid in math class, huh?" Cindy nodded absently, and Libby continued. "So, in other words, you don't want Nick. Or…say, Jimmy Neutron."
Cindy looked at her best friend, her nose wrinkled. "Of course not Nick! God, his brain is the size of a peanut. And who the hell is Jimmy Neutron?"
Libby thought this whole conversation was ridiculous. Cindy sometimes had dreams and aspirations that were out-of-reach and kind of inane; and what was this about her not knowing who Jimmy Neutron was? He is her neighbor, after all…and he had been her entire life.
Deciding not to argue, Libby laid down next to her best friend and they were both quiet.
On the eavesdropping side of the spectrum, Jimmy Neutron was shocked.
Was he really that overlooked? Sure, he didn't think that Cindy Vortex took time out of her perfect planned schedule to think about her neighbor, but it wasn't like he was completely invisible.
And what was that bullshit about not wanting to date the smartest kid in math class? Jimmy did not like to brag, but he was the smartest kid math class. That was just pure knowledge.
I do not like this, Jimmy decided quickly. And I'm going to do something about it.
"Well, if you're going to win over her heart, how are you going to do it?"
Jimmy Neutron had a serious issue at hand. He knew what he wanted to do, but he didn't know how. This was a very unsettling situation. He was usually good at figuring out how to do things. It was basically his living.
"I…don't know. Any suggestions, boys?"
Sheen thought long and hard, his eyes staring at a spot on the wall, not even blinking. Jimmy was used to this, however, and looked to Carl for any guidance. He was sitting cross-legged on the floor, picking at his shoes. "Carl? Have you thought of anything?"
Carl looked up, adjusted his glasses and shrugged. "You could…try to be different."
Jimmy's brows furrowed. "How so?"
"Well…Cindy said she wanted something different and extraordinary. You could try to be different and extraordinary."
Jimmy waited for a few moments to let this idea sink in. And when it did, it was like a revelation. It was such a simple solution to a difficult problem!
"You are exactly right, Carl!" Jimmy jumped up from his huge genius chair and Sheen jumped in alarm, blinking rapidly. "But wait…how am I supposed to be extraordinary?"
Sheen and Carl stared at him with blank looks on their faces. Jimmy felt just as blank as they did. He sighed with defeat and slumped back into his chair.
"We need help."
Sheen nodded, staring at the wall again. "Okay, we need something…no, someone. Someone who can help you be extraordinary. Who do you know that is extraordinary?"
All three boys stopped and thought about this. Who was extraordinary? More importantly, what made a person extraordinary? Were there more than one definition of extraordinary, and what was Cindy's definition?
Jimmy, because he was a genius, pondered all these questions very carefully. He was so deep in thought, he didn't notice as Sheen jumped up, exasperated with all the thinking and pondering, and starting ranting about girls and their mysterious ways to Carl when Jimmy finally got an idea of what to do.
"We need to keep spying," Jimmy stood up, as if he had just announced to a room that he was seventeen years old, male, and a genius; all normal and obvious things.
Sheen froze with his arms up in the air, where they had been exaggeratedly making a point. Carl looked up at him curiously.
"Oh my. Carl, are you listening to this? Jimmy had a good idea, and for once, I think the source was from me. Me, Carl. I am the genius of the hour!" Sheen became mobile again, his arms flailing.
Jimmy just rolled his eyes.
Spying was a fantastic idea, it really was. But what Jimmy, Sheen, and Carl didn't count on was the fact that girls, even teenage ones, didn't talk about boys all day and all night, unlike what everyone said about them. They talked about various other subjects: clothes, make-up, music, movies, TV, shopping, plans to go shopping, how bitchy some other girl is, how slutty some other girl is, their parents, how unfair their parents are, and how hot that guy was.
See, whenever girls talked about boys, it usually wasn't "Oh, see that guy? I don't like him. You know what I like in a guy?" And so on. It was more like, "Oh, see that guy? He's so hot." Or it was, "Oh, see that guy? I met him once at the mall. He's so hot, but he has a girlfriend. She's such a bitch, and slutty too. Want to go shopping later? Oh, you can't? Your parents are so unfair these days."
And so Jimmy found himself with another dilemma.
And like before, Sheen was the main solver of his problems.
"Libby is such a hottie," Sheen said as they hovered outside of Cindy's window like they had every day for the past week and a half. "I hardly talk to her, though. I should really start. She's in a lot of my classes…" Sheen kept talking on and on about how nice Libby was, how hot she was, how she smiled at him the other day in math class, and even though it got really annoying, it started to make Jimmy think.
Libby was Cindy's best friend, obviously. They talked about anything and everything. So what if he convinced Sheen to talk to Libby, who would talk to Cindy and then get back to him?
Like any other undeveloped, premature plan, this particular plan had many flaws. Like, what if Libby didn't want anything to do with Sheen? Or, what if she did but didn't want to help Jimmy?
Either way, Jimmy was a believer in doing something just to see if it would work. After thinking about the outcome, he would just ask Sheen to talk to Libby, and it was all set. It was what you called an experiment, and Jimmy, the lover of all things scientific, was a fervent believer in all things experimental, as stated before.
"Sheen, you like Libby, right?" Jimmy asked abruptly. Sheen faltered, and Carl laughed a little.
"More like love," Carl teased. "You talk about her all the time. It's gets a little annoying after awhile."
Sheen glared at them both, smacking them in the head with both his hands, at the same time, something that took talent and time. "What would you know about love, Carl?"
Before a debate broke out, Jimmy interrupted, "Okay, so why don't you talk to her? You just said she's in your classes. You talk to her, and I've even got some great talking points for you."
Sheen brightened considerably. "You do? That's great. What do you have in mind?"
"I think that…killing two birds with one stone is what I'm thinking."
Carl and Sheen looked equally confused, so he continued, "Well, there is something I need to know about Cindy, and you want to talk to Libby. So, by asking Libby about Cindy, then you get to talk to her and I get to find the correct information about Cindy. Therefore, we're killing two birds with one stone."
Sheen considered this, putting a hand to his chin thoughtfully. "Yes, that is…a useful idea…no, it's a great idea. You are a genius…oh wait, yeah, we already knew that. But it's worth mentioning. Anyway, what should I talk to her about, exactly?"
Jimmy climbed down from the tree, realizing that the spying thing was going absolutely nowhere and Sheen and Carl followed obediently.
"I know what you can say," Carl chimed in with a smile. "You can say, "Hello, my name is Sheen and I think you're hot. I want you to tell me what kind of qualities your best friend, Cindy Vortex, likes in a guy. Want to hang out?" I think that sounds good, doesn't it?"
Jimmy laughed in spite of himself and Sheen shoved Carl, who almost fell but didn't. Carl just laughed and ran ahead. "Right, sure. That sounds great and all, Carl, but I don't think it'll work. I think you should just try striking up casual conversation with her. Ask her how she is…that kind of stuff. You think you can do that?" He glanced at Sheen as they walked up the steps to Jimmy's front porch and sat down.
Sheen just nodded.
"Good. Then, eventually, you can ask her about Cindy. You need to specifically ask her what Cindy sees in an extraordinary guy, and I guess if she asks, you can tell her why you want to know."
Looking confused, Sheen blinked at him. "Uh huh…and why do I want to know, again?"
Carl snorted and shook his head. "This will never work."
Jimmy shot him a sharp look and said, "Because…well, I want to know, and I asked you to. Okay?"
Nodding, Sheen leaned back on his elbows. "Of course, it'll be done, and it'll be done smooth and suave-like. You just wait and see."
Carl shook his head again and Jimmy smiled uncertainly. "It better."
Sheen tapped his pencil restlessly on his desk, peering at Libby out of the corner of his eye. She had her head resting in her left hand, facing him and away from the teacher. Her pencil was poised, but her eyes were closed. She was obviously schooled in the art of fooling teachers, which was one of the many reasons Sheen liked her.
Sheen tapped his pencil harder now, glancing at the teacher who was clicking around on her computer, not paying any attention to her students. Perfect.
He reached over and tapped his pencil on her desk, and her eyes fluttered open slowly. She didn't look at him, didn't even notice him, but he watched her as she stared at her homework and then to the clock, and finally, to Sheen's pencil that was still touching the edge of her desk. Her eyes trailed up and up and up his arm and his shoulder and finally to his face, where she raised one brow at him tiredly.
He just grinned and gave her a slight wave. She nodded her head once in recognition and watched as he ripped a piece of paper out of his notebook and wrote her a note and passed it to her silently:
Hey, I'm Sheen.
Libby thought that this had to be the weirdest thing that had happened to her all day.
Yeah, I know.
Sheen just grinned, hardly able to contain his joy.
How are you?
Libby blinked at the piece of paper on her desk disbelievingly. This kid just wanted to know how she was doing? That was it? He didn't want to cheat off of her, hook up with her, or annoy her?
Uh…how are you?
Sheen couldn't believe that Jimmy's advice had actually worked. She was talking to him!
You're friends with Cindy Vortex, right?
The mocha-skinned girl narrowed her eyes and sat up straighter. Oh. He probably liked Cindy, and he knew that they were best friends. He probably just wanted her to play matchmaker. What a joke…
Yeah, I am.
Do you want her number?
Confused, Sheen hoped that Libby didn't get the idea that he liked Cindy.
No! No, I don't like Cindy, but my friend does.
And we were wondering what Cindy sees in a guy. Since you're her best friend, we figured that you'd be able to help us.
This hardly made Libby feel better, actually. Not only was he just talking to her on behalf of his "friend", but the conversation was still centered on Cindy, and she wasn't even around!
Oh, I see.
I am able to help you.
But why should I?
Sheen had not predicted that Libby might say no. He had no clue what to do or say to this, because really, she had no reason to help them. He would just have to work his charm on her.
Well, I can't really think of a reason, but how about I take you on a date?
Would that make up for the trouble you'd have to go through?
The teacher turned on the room now, squawking about worksheets and bad grades and detentions and Libby crumpled up the note and held it in her hand tightly.
Her only answer was the bright grin she sent his way, and he grinned back.
Killing two birds with one stone, indeed.
"It worked?" Jimmy asked with a pleasant smile on his face, and Sheen nodded. He had just gotten back from his date with Libby, where they shared ice cream and they barely talked about Cindy at all, except at the end, when Libby kissed him straight on the lips and said, "I'll help you."
"Not only did it work, it worked wonderfully. She agreed to help us and I got a date and kiss. How lucky am I?" Sheen bragged with a smug smile on his face.
Carl rolled his eyes. "She kissed you? That's surprising. Even more surprising than the fact that she agreed to go on a date with you in the first place."
Sheen turned on him, anger apparent on his face. "Shut up, Carl! I don't need your snarky behavior right now; it's ruining my good mood!"
"Both of you shut up!" Jimmy barked, standing up from his position on the porch step, and focused on Cindy's house with clear, excited eyes. "That's all she said? That she would agree to help? I need details, Sheen, DETAILS."
"Oh, she said something about going over to Cindy's house tonight. We'll spy on them whenever she goes over there." Sheen didn't bother to move from his now relaxed position on the railing of Jimmy's porch, where he was perched like a bird, reading to jump up and fly away at any given second.
"And by tonight, you mean right now, don't you?" Carl asked, pointing across the street, where Libby was walking up the steps of Cindy's house.
Sheen smiled sheepishly. "Yeah, right now. That's what I meant."
Jimmy just grinned. "That's perfect. Let's go."
"There's that Spring Formal dance coming up soon, you have anybody in mind?" Libby asked while peering at her reflection in the mirror, or at least, that's what Cindy assumed she was doing. She was actually trying to see if Sheen and his friends were outside the window, listening. And they were.
Cindy shrugged. She was flipping through her closet, slowly, listening to the click-clack of the hangers hitting one another. "Not really. There aren't many choices here in Boringville," She said mildly, pulling out a shirt, and then putting it back.
"What are you looking for, anyway? Considering that I am one of the best Matchmakers of my time, I think that I can be of some help." She shot a smile her friend's way and Cindy shook her head, a slight smile on her face.
"I'm looking for extraordinary."
Libby huffed and straightened, turning towards her friend. "I know that, silly. But…what makes a guy extraordinary?"
Outside the window, Jimmy was doing a victory dance in his head. Libby had gotten the question perfectly. And now, all he had to do was wait for the perfect answer.
Cindy stopped sifting through her clothes and fixed her feature with a confused but concentrated expression. "Well…I don't really know. Extraordinary isn't really something that can be described. It's something that sort of just happens. It's not like you can pinpoint an extraordinary guy just by looking at him."
Libby considered this and sat down on Cindy's bed. "You have a point. But what are looking for? Smart? Handsome? Good at sports? You're giving me nothing to go on."
Cindy sat down beside her with a sigh. "I know. I guess I'm waiting for a certain click feeling with a guy. Any guy. Well, no, not just any guy. That's the problem. I don't want to settle for just any guy."
Now, Cindy was extremely confused, and so were the three guys sitting outside of her house, listening to the girls talk.
But Libby had an idea. Picking up a stray magazine that lay on the floor, she read the headline that said, Marcus Nevins: Extraordinary Man of the Year?
"This is ironic," she muttered, flipping through the magazine until she landed on the interview page. "Have you ever heard of Marcus Nevins?" She asked Cindy.
Cindy leaned over the bed and peered at the magazine with squinty eyes. "Yeah. Isn't he the inventor of something? He's…majorly hot."
Libby grinned in a wolfish way. "He is majorly hot."
Marcus Nevins was not the actual inventor of anything. He was distantly related to an inventor; the inventor of AstroTurf. And AstroTurf wasn't that amazing of an invention to Cindy and Libby, but this guy was filthy rich. He had inherited millions after his ancestors died and passed on the patent of AstroTurf to their beloved great-great-great?-grandson.
And it certainly helped that he wasn't bad to look at; he wore glasses, but they were the sexy black-rimmed kind that looked more for style than for reading, he had black, mussed-up hair that made him look like he had just rolled out of bed, and vivid green eyes. He also dressed in an "I'm rich and I wear expensive clothing, but the clothing I wear looks cheap" style, which could be obnoxious on some but looked good on him.
He was good in business and finances, and although he didn't run the AstroTurf business completely, he was pretty close. He was smart, charming, dashing, handsome…and, according to the magazine, extraordinary.
"It says here he's the Most Extraordinary Man of the Year. I agree wholeheartedly, don't you? It also says he's coming to Dallas."
"When?" Cindy ripped the magazine out of Libby's grasp and held it close to her face. "Oh, it's this weekend. He's coming to the Texas Ranger's ballpark."
Libby glanced towards this window. "You think he's extraordinary?"
Cindy nodded, staring at the picture of Marcus Nevins and all his handsome features.
"So you would say an extraordinary guy would be smart, handsome, and good with money, rich…things like that?"
Cindy shrugged. "I guess. What are you getting at?"
"Nothing, nothing." Libby gazed at the magazine again, and didn't bring up the topic of Extraordinary Men again for the rest of the day.
"That was absolutely suckish," Sheen said as they entered Jimmy's house not ten minutes later. All the spying, thinking, and tree-climbing made them hungry.
Jimmy was very disappointed. "I know. She's so…vague. And who is this Marcus Nevins character? I've never even heard of him."
"I don't know, but he's coming to Dallas this weekend." Sheen said while browsing through Jimmy's fridge. "We should go meet up with him and get tips on how to be extraordinary."
Carl shook his head. "No way. That's a bad idea."
But as luck would have it, he said this the same time Jimmy said, "Sheen! That's a great idea!"
"What's a great and bad idea?" Mrs. Neutron stepped into the kitchen with her husband in tow, carrying grocery bags.
Carl smiled dreamily, and Sheen hit him with a piece of ham he found in the fridge, and laughed.
"We want to go meet Marcus Nevins in Dallas this weekend," Jimmy said quickly, before Carl or Sheen could object.
Mrs. Neutron smiled, "That dreamy guy who invented AstroTurf?"
Hugh Neutron grumbled under his breath and retreated to the living room, not liking his wife explain someone else as "dreamy."
"That would be the one," Carl said, equally as irritated as Mr. Neutron.
"Oh, you want to drive all the way to Dallas? I don't know if that's a good idea. Hugh! Come in here and help me with the groceries!"
Jimmy sighed. "It's not just for fun, though, mom. It's…a project for school. We have to interview a real person about inventions."
Mrs. Neutron smiled. "Well, why don't they ask you? You've invented plenty of things."
Carl smiled. "Yeah, they really should ask you. It would save us a lot of trouble –"
Jimmy elbowed Carl in the side and he grunted, but falling quiet.
"Well, I'm not really famous for my inventions. So, we can go, right?"
With her head stuck in the fridge, Jimmy heard his mother say something like, "You can go if blah blah blah and you have to be careful and blah blah blah and your father blah money blah NO ALCOHOL blah."
"Sure, okay, thanks!"
Jimmy ushered his two best friends out of his kitchen and upstairs to his room.
"That was surprisingly easy," he commented. "Now, we just have to convince Cindy…and Libby…to go with us."
Sheen perked up considerably. "YES! Wait, why? Why would we bring them along if you're going to find out how to get Cindy to date you?"
"Because it's an opportunity to get closer to her. And don't you want to get closer to Libby?"
Carl was unhappy. "What do I get out of this? Sheen has Libby, you have Cindy, and I have nothing! I'd like to benefit from this too," He stated, crossing his arms.
Jimmy thought about this for a moment. "Sheen and I will find a girlfriend for you. You just have to give us time."
Carl rolled his eyes and sighed loudly. "I don't necessarily need a girlfriend. But you know…we could go to the Dallas Zoo…they have llamas there. A lot of llamas."
Sheen snickered but Jimmy just shrugged. "Whatever you want, Carl. Whatever you want."
Sheen threw his arms in the air with enthusiasm.
"This is like killing seven birds with one stone!"