Now, I got 2 more reviews, which was good enough for me. Still, I just wish people would review more. Anyways, now I will write about Squirrelflight (idea originally suggested by Wolfstar Of ThunderClan) and how she felt about lying and her issues with Brambleclaw. Not issues with Brambleclaw, BRAMBLECLAW'S ISSUES! You can tell, I am not very fond of that stupid tabby.

So Much To Lose

Leafpool is my sister

Brambleclaw is my mate.

Which one should I choose?

I've always been particularly closer

To my dear sister.

But I love Brambleclaw so much.

He even killed his brother--

For me!

My heart is full of shame

Of what I must do.

If the secret stays hidden,

Will Brambleclaw still love me?

If he found out that his three children

Whom he was so proud of

Were not his

What would he do?

Would he hate me?

I cannot make a choice between anything,

I love him so much.

But there were so much to lose.

Leafpool had kits

Kits for Crowfeather

They were medicine cat half-Clan kits.

What if those kits found out?

Would they hate me?

There was just so much to lose.

I didn't trust Hawkfrost

Neither did I trust Brambleclaw

When he got close to his half-brother.

We had quarrels,

And I grow close to Ashfur.



I got close to him,

And we became friends.

He was always agreeing with whatever I say.

But I realize

What Ashfur really wants.

He wants more than just good friends

Not just allies

Not just friends

But mates.

He wished so,

And I had hated Brambleclaw so much.

He thought he was the boss of me

As if he was Clan leader.


He got close to Brambleclaw,

Slowly flouncing slyly toward him,

I knew Brambleclaw was starting to plot with Hawkfrost.

There was something wrong...

And I didn't like how he got close to his brother.

We argued

We fought

We yelled at each other.

Then Hawkfrost planned to kill Firestar.

Brambleclaw killed Hawkfrost

But it wasn't just for Firestar;

I knew that.

He also did it

For me.


But now I have to lie.

He will hate me again...

And this time...

It's not going to be his fault

But mine.

There's too much to lose in my life.

I want to keep hold of so many things.


Some things I have to lose.

Ashfur's love

Brambleclaw's love.

Hollyleaf's love.

Jayfeather's love.

Lionblaze's love.

I lost too much.

I didn't want to lose more.

I don't want to lose Leafpool's love.

So I lied for her.

But nothing good resulted

I wanted to die!

The piercing, hurt look Brambleclaw gave me

When Hollyleaf announced it at the Gathering.

No one loves me anymore

Brambleclaw hates me.

Hollyleaf hates me.

Ashfur hates me.

I don't belong anywhere now.

There was too much to lose,

Too much to keep.

Too much to love,

Too much to hate.

My heart is broken

I know Brambleclaw's is, too.

But I still love him!

Is there any love for me, possibly

Still left in him?

My heart is broken.

No words or herbs can mend it

Only Brambleclaw can.

His warm embrace

His amber eyes

Gleaming at me with love.

His tabby pelt brushing my dark ginger one,

Rubbing his warm muzzle against mine's.

Telling me

Those words

"I forgive you,"

Will be enough.

But just if he adds warmly,

"I forgive you, Squirrelflight."

I would love that

I would never spoil another chance

To love.

I would never do that again

Even if I have much to lose,

I have much to hold onto.

But I didn't hold on tightly

I broke my own heart

I broke my own chance.

And most of all,

I broke Brambleclaw's heart.

How many things am I breaking?

Hollyleaf's life I broke.

Leafpool's medicine cat career I broke.

Jayfeather's certainty I broke.

Lionblaze's strong heart I seem to break.

Brambleclaw's love I broke.

My own heart I broke.

Ashfur's love, I broke too!

I just think

I broke too many things

Too many things to lose.

But too many things

To love.

To hate.

To hold on tightly.

I missed my chance

And now, my heart might never mend.

I just wish

There was a herb

Leafpool could use

To heal my scarred heart

To heal my broken love.

If I were Leafpool

I would grab all the herbs I knew

To mend Brambleclaw's heart.

I won't mend Squirrelflight's

Because Squirrelflight, I,

Have just

Too much to lose,

Too much to hold onto.

WAHHH! *sob sob* Brambleclaw just overreacted when Hollyleaf announced the news... HOW CAN THEIR RELATIONSHIP BE SPOILED?!

Squirrelflight is so poor! I love Squirrelflight! This poem is dedicated to Squirrelflight and all the Squirrelflight fans!