Buffy and me are like the typical sisters.
We are always fighting.
She thinks she's all that. Just because she happens to be the slayer.
What about me? What am I? Just a typical teenager who appears to be invincible to the rest of the world?
Guess I am just a nobody trying to live up to the perfect image, but eventually who never succeeds.
If all it takes it to be slim and long to be perfect why don't I get to fit in? Why am I left out practically everywhere?
Buffy's downstairs now. Having some meeting with her 'scoobies'
I was asking if I was allowed to join in. She just answered with a harsh no. Buffy always acts like I'm a burden to her.
Some times it hurts. Then it makes me angry.
I wish there was somebody who would understand me. I wish I could have just one true friend at school.
But it seems useless.
I'm gonna quit writing now.
I'll soon write another letter.


The 14 year old Dawn put her pen down.
She was sitting at her desk and she stared out the window to the tree just outside. She had created a mailbox out of an old plastic box.
Pink paper was glued onto the box and she had decorated it with little paper butterflies and flowers.

Dawn S. it said. She had hidden the box in between two long and thick branches.

She carefully folded the letter two times and climbed into the tree. She felt free up there.
Like she had a place for herself where nobody could touch her.
The mailbox made it even more special. Dawn had been keeping diaries since her early childhood.
She had just decided after her last full diary to create some new system.
She would post letters to the mailbox she had created. It would be her new diary form.
The fresh air breezed across her face, causing goose bumps on her bare arms.
Dawn closed her eyes for a bit. It was like a cold caress. Would that be what vampire fingers would feel like?
She had always wondered when Angel was around. She always fell a bit silent around him.
He had this something that made her back away.

One time she had heard Buffy apologizing for her when she ran up the stairs because she felt uncomfortable in his presence. "Don't mind it" Buffy had told Angel.
What she hadn't realized is that Dawn had heard it.
But Angel was gone now and Spike had kind of bumped into her life uninvited.
Buffy always told him off.
Sometimes Dawn felt sorry for him. He did have the opposite effect on Dawn than Angel did.

She was a bit uncomfortable around him, but not because she was scared.
There was something about Spike that made her curious.
One time she had spied on him. She had followed him on one of his night walks.
Finally he had stopped.

"Dawn, what are you doing out?" He said without even turning around.

"How did you know?" She wondered in surprise.

"Vampire hearing, love" He turned and walked upto her and put both hands on her shoulders.
"Look, it might look exciting and all to go out for nightly walks, but it's dangerous," he had turned her around gently and walked her back.
Dawn had been quiet. He had waited patiently until she opened the door with the key and went in. That's what Spike was like.
Even though Buffy couldn't see the good bits of him.

Dawn climbed back into the room through her window, she watched her alarm clock that told her it was diner time.
She trotted down the stairs.
As usual the house was full with people again. Willow, Xander and Anya were standing in the hallway. Where was Tara?

Dawn was fond of Tara. She always seemed so understanding.
Like that one time outside the magic box when they had found that dead man inside. Buffy had pushed Dawn outside and Tara had joined her Dawn outside.

That was the moment she felt somebody had understood her.

"Hi Dawnie," Willow greeted her cheerfully.

"Hi Willow," Dawn smiled at her. Buffy was resting both hands on her hips, elbows facing backwards and she had a serious frown on her face.

"What do we do about the Faunar demon?" She asked.

"I'll be checking the web, and Tara and Xander will go for the books?"

"And me? What about me?" Dawn heard Anya protesting.

Willow addressed Anya a look who was clearly feeling insulted about her forgetting Anya.

"You can help Xander," Buffy said. "I will patrol"

"Who's ready to have some diner?" Joyce questioned while she came into the hallway.

"Me me me! What are we having mom?" Dawn asked being glad the subject had changed.
Dawn was happy to have her mothers attention at the diner table.
She would ask her about school and so on which strangely resulted in Buffy turning quiet and sending her annoyed looks.
She shrugged it away.

Then rumbling upstairs caught all of their attention...