THE BELLA/NICO APPLICATION

PLEASE FILL OUT A SEPARATE APPLICATION FOR EACH TWIN.

PLEASE RETURN TO DEMETRI VOLTURI WHEN FINISHED, AS I WILL BE THE ONE TO ASSESS THE ANSWERS AND MAINTAIN THE RECORDS. YOU HAVE TWENTY FOUR HOURS TO COMPLETE THIS APPLICATION, AFTER WHICH YOU WILL BE CONSIDERED NONEXISTANT TO ME AND WILL RECEIVE NO FURTHER RECOGNITION. EXCEPT FOR WHEN I QUESTION YOU ABOUT YOUR FAILURE TO COMPLETE THE APPLICATION.

EVERY HOUR

ON THE HOUR

EVERY DAY OF EVERY WEEK

EVERY WEEK OF THE YEAR

EVERY YEAR OF THE DECADE

EVERY DECADE OF THE CENTURY

AND SO ON.

IF YOU DON'T THINK I WILL DO IT, CHECK YOUR SOURCES AGAIN. I WILL.

TWIN: Princess Nicolette Volturi. And hopefully Black.

APPLICANT NAME: Jacob Black (Alpha)

APPLICANT AGE: 141

APPLICANT LOCATION: Wherever my Nico is.

DOES APPLICANT HOLD A POSITION OF POWER ANYWHERE: Well, yes. I AM Alpha of the Quileute Tribe.

WHAT ARE YOUR INTENTIONS WITH MY SISTER: Whatever my Nico wants.

CAN YOU PROVIDE FOR MY SISTER IN THE APPROPRIATE MANNER: Yes, but so can her awesome daddy- Marcus.

HAVE YOU DONE MY SISTER: ....yes.

MORE THAN ONCE?: .....frequently, actually.

PLEASE TAKE THE FOLLOWING SURVEY SO THAT I MAY ASSESS THE EXTENT OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE TOWARDS THE TWINS.

1. SHE IS SHOPPING WITH TWIN (AND ALICE), THE HUMAN ENVIRONMENT IS TOO MUCH FOR YOU TO HANDLE AND YOU NEED TO HUNT IMMEDIATELY. YOU
D) I don't hunt.

2. SHE IS VERY, VERY ANGRY WITH YOU. YOU…
A) EXPLAIN YOURSELF

3. SHE DOES SOMETHING TO AGGRAVATE YOU IMMENSELY. YOU…
D) APOLOGIZE AND BUY HER DIAMONDS BEFORE SHE CAN EVEN GET MAD AT YOU FOR BEING MAD AT HER (WHICH SHE WILL) though actually, i could never get mad at her. She's too perfect.....

4. I DO SOMETHING STUPID THAT HEIDI WOULDN'T LIKE. YOU FIND OUT BEFORE ANYONE ELSE. YOU…
C) ASK HER FIRST. BECAUSE YOU NEVER, EVER DO ANYTHING WITHOUT HER OPINION.

5. HER FAVORITE MOVIE IS Grease.

6. HER FAVORITE BOOK IS The Karma Sutra

7. HER FAVORITE BROTHER IS Demetri. There's absolutely no competition.

8. YOU'RE MEAN TO ALICE OR JANE. SHE FINDS OUT AND IS READY TO CASTRATE/DETIT YOU. YOU…
C) I WOULD NEVER DO THAT, JANE AND ALICE ARE SCARY

9. FELIX IS AFTER NICO… AGAIN. YOU… (IF YOU ARE FILLING THIS APPLICATION ABOUT BELLA, PLEASE DISREGARD THIS QUESTION UNTIL YOUR NICO ONE)
B) PROTECT HER FROM THE EVIL IN FELIX'S PANTS

I WILL SCORE THIS SURVEY AND ASSES YOUR QUALIFICATIONS UPON RECIEPT. YOU WILL BE NOTIFIED OF YOUR RESULTS WITHIN ONE MONTH.