Author's Notes

Seeing the direction I am going in, I can finally say that I am fed up even with the online community.

I've learnt that no matter what, people will always know what other people think of you in reality, just by observing your appearance.

Outside, people think I am a girl who cannot smile and a supposed mute. They stay away from me in fear of interaction. I blame the traitors who spread the rumours, knocking down my confidence when it came to confronting people. Online it is easier to talk, but I do sometimes think I sound arrogant...

Do you know what? This is exactly what everybody is doing to me lately. I can't believe it took me this long to realise I'll always be lonely.

This is for my actual friends, Jazz, Sky and Saby, who are definitely not frenemies like my previous friendships.

This is based on the rivalry between Ichigo and Retasu.


Bold - Retasu

Underline - Ichigo


"Frenemy" (sometimes spelled "frienemy"), is a portmanteau of "friend" and "enemy", which can refer to either an enemy disguised as a friend to a partner who is simultaneously a competitor.

"Frenemy" - Someone who pretends to be your friend, but is really your enemy.

Two was a number

Two was two friends

Two plus one

Three was a crowd

I kept my feelings hidden

But the blushing gave it away

I confided in my friend

Her name was Ichigo

Her words fell on deaf ears

I didn't want to listen

I wanted to tear my hair out

Retasu was in love with Ryou

I averted my gaze from Ichigo

Knowing the somewhat truth

This feeling was no longer a feeling

Love was a competition

Watching as Retasu left for home

I hurled my pillow at the wall

I closed my eyes tightly

Stifling the tears to come

The walk was different from others

It brought up unusual topics

One was Ichigo

The new single pringle on the block

My heart was pounding

I picked up the phone

Knowing that this was evil

I was hurting my best friend

I was going to confess tomorrow

I was going to bottle it up

I knew he was going to reject me

But it didn't matter anymore

I wanted to get him before she did

I dialled the numbers on my phone

Listening intently for his deep voice

Retasu was too late

I collapsed on my bed as I smiled

Dreaming on blonde curls and diamonds

I relied on Ichigo for trust

How little did I know

I confessed my love to him

Feeling somewhat giddy throughout it all

Ignoring my conscience

Ryou was truly mine

The next day I came to work

I managed to bottle it up

I saw his lips on hers

Ichigo was a frenemy to do it

Becoming quite physical amongst the kiss

I caught Retasu's eyes

I had lost something dear and sweet

It was friendship, how evil I was

At the end of the day I weeped

Mourning for somebody who lived

He'd live without my touch

He'd breathe in fresh strawberries

I regret what I did

I lie in my bed

Feeling somewhat incomplete

Retasu was lost to me now

Two was a number

Two was two friends

Two plus one

Three was a crowd