WOOT. Last chapter, X3! Finally. :D
End Of Book Two
To die of a heartache
The end, the tragedy
January 7th 2011
And you'll never hurt me again
It's been a year since their deaths.
I miss them so. I've found this journal, I've found Ted's journal and I read it. I read it only to weep, sitting beside the river and hoping, just hoping, for that beautiful sparkle of light into the sky, the blue glint of endless hope…the blue glint in the sky reminds me of them…they both had blue eyes, and mine, mine aren't blue to prior…they're turquoise eyes that haunt me into the mirror every time I look at them.
I'm trapped in a memory, a never ending memory.
I've seen them both at the last day of their lives. Randy's hands around Ted's, I could remember the look on Randy's face, confused, not knowing that he was even alive.
I can remember it all.
I can remember Randy holding onto Ted's chin roughly. "Of course I'm dead, love."
Ted's just bursting into tears as he jabs him with the end of the knife, the tip just piercing through Randy's flesh and then Randy's breathing got worse and worse and he just realizes so badly where he is and he realizes that this is all real and he's not dead yet and then Ted closes his eyes and I can almost hear both of their hearts beating.
So wildly, so horribly…
Then Ted says it.
"Kill me, Randy. Make me die with you. I don't wanna live on without you…I love you…"
Randy just stares.
"You really mean it," Randy's voice is soft. "You really mean it…you love me…" Randy's eyes had been shimmering with tears that fall way too fast.
"I love you," Ted says it like a song. "I've loved you ever since I've seen you for the first time but then…but then I just forgot it all, I was too focused on the pain but you'll free us both, painless, just end it all…just…just end it all…I don't want to care about anything else…I want to be able to wake up to you next morning and just smile. I want to be happy."
Randy had been grinning and laughing. "My Teddy wants to be happy…"
Ted nods his head, tears spilling from his eyes. "I want to be happy…"
It's like some sort of revolution as Randy holds onto Ted tightly, both of their arms closed and Randy softly plunges the knife into both of their hearts. I swear I can hear their hearts beating and I…I vowed that I'd never make the same mistake, never allow myself to feel that horrible pain. I just married the love of my love, Jonathon Anthony Felix Cena and I kept Britt with me. She's been growing swiftly and I showed her a picture of her parents. I swear sometimes, I see her standing up and dancing around in motions and I know that Ted is somehow there, holding onto her wrists and dancing along with her with Randy's eyes pierced onto his growing daughter.
There's still here.
When I see my empty bed, I can always feel their bodies pressing, their hearts beating…
Now I tuck Britt into her bed, apply a few flowers onto the grave, yellow tulips. Randy hates them but Ted loves him, and it's always been sort of this stupid joke between us when we'd buy Randy tulips for his birthday and…
I turn away before the memory overflows through me, saddens me…
I refuse to be sad.
I only want to be strong.
For me…for Britt…
I miss you. I love you and I hope you're both happy…just wherever you are, you know I'll always have faith. I'll always be strong. I'll always be happy…just because of you miserable old bastards.
God, I miss you…
In the distance, Ted giggles as he picks up the yellow tulips. "Hey! You blood-coated scum! Come over here!" Randy exclaims watching as Ted brings the tulips over to his face.
"Cody got you a gift, Ran!"
"…that's definitely for you."
"Are you afraid of flowers, Randy?"
"They're not flowers. They're monsters."
And so, Randy turns around and runs off as Ted chases him around with yellow tulips, nothing in the air but the cold air presses against them, the beat of their dead hearts, and…they've never been more alive, dancing into their places and running around, with the moonlight beating against their pale flesh, and the song of the nightingales burning into the air…
OKAY. Officially done! X3!
I couldn't think of another sucky ending.
LOVE YA, MISCHA. X3.
Til next time,