I own no rights and I take absolutely no credit for the creation of I Dream of Jeannie or its characters which were created by Sidney Sheldon. Some of the entries were based on the episodes of IDOJ. Not all episodes were written about and not all entries are based on a certain episode. Some scenarios for some entries I made up myself. Some of the entries that were written on an episode, I made up some continuing scenarios to make the entry written seem more complete. The actual episodes represented are the creation of various writers of the episode. Please refer to the credits at the end of each show written about to see the writer. Thank you and I hope you enjoy Major Nelson's diary.
Today, I was to go on a launch. Everything seemed to be going fine. However, something went off course and I had to be brought down. I ended up landing on a desert island. I was stranded and didn't know how I was going to get home. I put an SOS writing in the sand and I just waited. While I waited, I found a rather strange looking bottle. I didn't think anything of it at first. I picked it up and set it back down somewhere, but when I turned around, it had moved, at least I thought it had. So I picked it up and put it back where I had it to begin with and right before my eyes, it moved. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. So I decided to examine it more closely. I picked it up and pulled the cork out of this bottle and I rubbed it with my hand, and WHOA!!! Smoke started coming out the bottle. I threw it to the ground and the smoke still came and I could not believe what appeared before me. It was a beautiful young woman (or at least I thought she was young). I rubbed my eyes, thinking I was only seeing things and before I knew it, she looked at me with a smile and walked over to me and kissed me. Now I knew I had to be dreaming. Next thing I knew she started speaking in some foreign tongue. Then it came to me. She must be a genie. I learned that her name was also Jeannie. I had heard and read about genies, but I never believed in them, at least not until today. It also occurred to me that since I had rescued her that I was entitled to a wish, but no matter how I spoke to her, she did not understand me and I just happened to blurt out that I wished she would speak English and she did. I then asked for a helicopter to get me off that island and there it was. It was amazing. She really was a genie. Next thing I knew, she was all over me saying she wanted to please me and she called me Master. I told her that I had set her free, but she would not stay. She was bound and determined to come with me and little did I know how tricky she would be. I thought I had left her there, but I didn't.
Once I was back at NASA, my fiancée Melissa met me there. She is so amazing. Her father is actually my superior officer. What a day that will be when I get him for a father-in-law. Melissa was the next one to see Jeannie. As I said, I didn't even know how tricky Jeannie would be. Melissa and I walked into my house and she asked me if she could cook dinner for me tonight and I thought it would be wonderful. The next thing we knew, we heard my shower running and I looked over on my chair and saw the bottle and knew it was Jeannie. I tried to get Melissa out before Jeannie came walking in, but it didn't work. Jeannie comes walking out of my bedroom, wearing one of my shirts and nothing else (oh dear, I'm in trouble). Of course, Melissa was very upset, but I knew I couldn't tell her who Jeannie really was. She'd never believe me. I tried to come up with something to explain, but it was no good. Melissa left mad. Jeannie was upset because I had said she wasn't a girl and so I appeased her by telling her I appreciated her and what she did for me and the next thing I knew, she was all over me again. I tried to call Dr. Bellows and there she was on the counter by my phone, staring at me, smiling. She kept coming at me and putting her arms around me saying she wanted to please me and that she could do a better job than Melissa and the funny thing is, I half believed her for a moment. But I wouldn't tell anyone that.
Well, I wished her away and that didn't work. I tried to get her into her bottle with no luck. So I tricked her by dropping a black marble in her bottle and that did it. I tried to get rid of it and about that time, Dr. Bellows, Melissa's father, and others came up and I dropped the bottle in the trash bin for just a moment and while we talked, the trash truck drove up and was emptying my trash and I was overcome knowing I had dropped Jeannie in her bottle in the trash bin. I went bananas and of course Dr. Bellows and everyone else thought I had gone crazy. I even offered to buy the garbage from the trash guys just to get the bottle out of there and I did. I didn't want Jeannie to get hurt.
We all went in my house and I even tried to prove to Dr. Bellows and everyone there that there was a genie in that bottle. When Jeannie was not cooperating, I decided to tell them all it was a joke and I was just pulling their leg. Everyone bought it, but I think Dr. Bellows still thinks there is something wrong with me. Jeannie was terribly upset with me and I even told her thank you again for helping me and I tried to get rid of her yet again, but it was no good. She kept insisting she was there to please me and she wasn't about to go anywhere. She kept trying to hug on me and of course I wouldn't tell her this, but I was kind of enjoying that, but I should have. I am an engaged man. Then tonight, when Melissa and her father came over, Jeannie had all these harem girls blinked up and she put this ridiculous costume on me. I told her to get rid of all of it and she got upset with me again, and hid. Luckily, she must have been watching from the background and she changed it all back before they saw anything. Only they did see me in that ridiculous outfit and I got past that one when Melissa asked me if I was going to a costume party. Jeannie sat in the background and made herself to look like Melissa and was mocking her when she talked. I mean who is this genie! She is the most persistent being I believe I have ever met. After Melissa and her father left, Jeannie started up again. She started hanging on me again and then she did what she did what she did when she first saw me. She kissed me and I don't want to say it, but I liked it. Even though I pulled her off, I kind of wanted her to do it again. I told her that I wanted her to be gone by the time I got up the next morning and I went into my bedroom. She followed me and smoked in under the door. I guess she thinks I needed her help changing clothes and I told her to get out and she smoked out. I have a feeling that even though I told her to get lost, she will still be here in the morning and part of me hopes that she is. Again, I am afraid to even say this, but Jeannie is just beautiful and I am afraid that I may even have feelings, but it will just have to go away. I am engaged to be married to Melissa and Melissa and I will be very happy together.
Well I haven't gotten rid of Jeannie, but now that I have her, I'm kind of glad I have her. There's something about her that I just can't explain. We had quite a day today. She revealed something to me today that made me very mad. I went into my kitchen and found sacks with stuff in them all over my kitchen counters. Jeannie came walking in saying she had been to the market. I thought she must have been crazy to go dressed like she was. She said she wanted to get stuff for supper. I thought it was kind of sweet. She really does want to take care of me. Anyways, all of a sudden she got a very sad look on her face and was on the verge of tears. She asked if I thought it was proper for a man to strike a woman. I was dumbfounded. I asked her if someone had hit her and she said yes and I asked her if it was at the market and she said yes. Oh, that sent me flying. Let me at the numskull. No one was going to hit my Jeannie and get away with it. So I asked her to take me to him and boy did she.
It turns out she didn't go the market in Cocoa Beach. She went in PERSIA. So I was up against the biggest man there. Even though he was way taller than me and definitely had bigger muscles, there was no way I was letting him get away with hitting Jeannie. So I stuck up for her, but all he to do was pick me up by my jacket. So I basically ended up running from him and ran myself right into a slave auction and got myself sold and I was put in prison. It was awful. Jeannie had taken off while I was trying to fight the guy who hit her. She went to her mother's house. I ended up coming face to face with the guy again after being put into prison and I still let him know that I didn't take too kindly to him hitting Jeannie and I was handcuffed with arms in the air in another prison cell. Jeannie came and rescued me, but little did I know she was trying to lure me into a trap.
It turns out that the fact that I had come there to avenge the man who hit her was a proposal of marriage and she was off planning our wedding. Well I just had to tell her that I was not going to marry her. So she decides to send me back to my cell. I thought "Oh, come on Jeannie. It's not you. I think you're beautiful." So she blinks me back again still insisting that I am to marry her and I still said no and she sends me back to my cell again. "Oh, what will I do?", I thought. Then that low life man came back and said he was ready to kill me, but insisted that I tell him where Jeannie was first. Well I flat refused. I wasn't about to let him near her. Right before he proceeds to stab me, he is smoked into being about 2 inches tall. It was the funniest thing you ever saw. About that time, Jeannie blinked in with her arms around me and said that I was willing to risk my life for her and so she sent me home, but said she wasn't coming. I got home and found she was serious. I didn't mean for that to happen. I really did want her to come with me. I have to say I meant what I said when I said she was the greatest thing that has happened to me. Of course Roger came in about then and then left after we said a few words and then a surprise. Jeannie popped back in. I was so happy. I was so afraid she really wasn't coming. As I said, I am glad that I have her. I don't know what it is, but there is just something different about her, besides the fact that she's a genie. It's like my heart skips a beat when I look at her. I just can't explain it.
Today I feel so free. I have to say I wasn't expecting to happen what has happened the last few days. Melissa's father has received a new job over in Europe and wanted to offer me a job to go with him and I said thank you kindly, but no thanks. I'm not about to leave Cocoa Beach. I'm an astronaut because I want to be and I have no intention of leaving the space program. Melissa and her father couldn't understand and figured I would just get used to the idea of the new job and just kept going ahead with plans without consulting me.
When I had my bachelor party, Melissa's father had the nerve to choose my best man for me and announced it right in front of Roger. That made me very upset. Then I was to learn that Melissa had changed our honeymoon plans to going to Honolulu instead of Jamaica without even consulting me. I had already started to think that maybe marrying Melissa was not the right thing to do, but just figured it would turn out okay. Well one Melissa's old friends (the one who her father announced would be my best man) decided that I wasn't doing the right thing by Melissa by not taking the job her father offered me and then proceeded to say that she was too good for me. I wanted to say something, but I didn't because deep down I knew that marrying Melissa was not the right thing to do. I mean, I don't want to marry someone who just basically plans out my life and doesn't even consult me and then just changes our honeymoon plans without telling me. She was trying to control me and I didn't want that in a marriage. Besides all of this, I couldn't marry Melissa because I don't believe that you should marry someone that you don't really love. I mean it's not that I didn't love her, but our love just wasn't like it should be in a marriage. So Melissa let me go before I even had the chance to let her go. It was such a relief. This is the most freedom I have felt in a long time. I mean besides the fact that Melissa and I had outgrown our love for each other, I started thinking that I may have feelings for Jeannie. But that just can't be.. It just never would work with her. It's just that she has the most tender heart and spirit towards me and it just gets to me and when she looks at me, I think, well. That's all for now.
Jeannie has decided to she wants to try and live like all modern women. She has been reading this magazine that talks about how to live like a modern woman. I thought it was rather cute what she was trying to do. Of course, me and my big mouth decided to say that she was perfect the way she is and then I turned right around and said she didn't do this or do that right. When will I learn to keep my big mouth shut? What I should have said was that even though she was a genie woman, she was fine the way she is. She has a lot to learn, but you now what? So do I.
So while I was at work, she proceeded to put her hair up in curlers and put on my bath robe (my bath robe??) and comes marching down the stairs and tells me she will not be taken for granted. I feel bad because I never meant for her to feel that way. She then had proceeded to order these clothes under charge accounts (the magazine again). Some guy showed up at my doorstep with a delivery for a Mrs. Nelson. Now I thought she had gone crazy. I told her that all that stuff must go back and then she had to pull something to soften me into a puddle of mush. She blinked on one of the outfits she had gotten and she was the beautiful thing I had ever seen. She had on a silver dress with shiny sequins and her hair up and, gosh, I thought I was going to fall over she looked so beautiful. She asked me if I was pleased and I couldn't help but say how beautiful she was. Then she kissed me and then I knew I was sunk. I told her that she couldn't have learned that in the magazine. It was wonderful. So I took her for a night out and it was fun for us both even though she did embarrass herself and me by trying to show some lady how to do a harem dance that according to her was being done wrong (oh for pete sake). Oh well, she sure made the night interesting. Then again, she has made my life interesting since she came here and I wouldn't trade it for anything. She's amazing and I… well best go for now.
I have had a challenging past few days. I almost had Jeannie taken away from me for good three times. Let's go to the first time. We had a couple of visitors to the base and Roger and I were to escort them around for a few days. As luck would have it, I had to get the beautiful Russian woman. Of course that made Jeannie upset as heck. A few days before that, she had gone out with Roger to make me jealous and I wouldn't tell her this, but it worked. She then proceeded to do it again one night (the night before our base visitors were to arrive) and I talked her out of it, even though I know she was only doing it to make me jealous (and again, it was working). So she said she would not if I would not go out with other girls and I agreed.
Then low and behold, here comes the Russian woman, Sonya. Sonya had the hots for me from the get go, and she was a little much for me, but I had to obey orders. Jeannie still did not understand. So she proceeded to levitate her bottle into Roger's coat pocket when he came by that night. She wanted to spy of course, but she only got herself into trouble. Roger found the bottle in his pocket when Sonya saw it and not knowing it was mine he gave it to her. I tried to worm my way into Sonya's room and it was working and I actually found Jeannie's bottle and as luck would have it, the general showed up and I tried to hide the bottle but it did not work and even though it wasn't this place, the general insisted on her keeping the bottle. The nerve of him!!!
Well Sonya figured it out, she got mad and through me out and she summoned Jeannie from her bottle not knowing what was in it, and according to the rules, she became Jeannie's mistress. I tried and tried to get her back, but no luck. I thought I had lost Jeannie for good when Sonya's plane took off. However, Sonya didn't take off that day. She had Jeannie make her American and apparently gave her everything she wanted and so she came to my house. Well I was shocked. She said she was going to give Jeannie back to me on one condition: that I marry her. Well that was out of the question and so she wouldn't give Jeannie back to me. So I asked if I could at least say goodbye. At this point, it was really breaking me up inside. I was fixing to have to let go of the best thing that has ever come into my life.
Then Jeannie came up with a smart idea. She blinked up a fake me and the fake me agreed to marry Sonya so I could get the bottle and get her out. That was a close call. I had my Jeannie back and no one was going to take her from me again. At least that is what I thought.
A few days later, Roger came by for something and I had to run some stuff to the base and I would be right back and so I left him at my house. He saw Jeannie's bottle and got curious and his curiosity got Jeannie out of her bottle. He finally knew the secret. So he asked Jeannie all about it and once she explained everything to him, he made a big mistake. He tricked her and put the cork on her bottle and put it in his jacket and stole her from me. He had the bottle. What could I do? I tried to reason with him the next morning, but it was no good. I had lost my Jeannie once again.
When I walked into his office the next morning, Jeannie fell into my arms and I hugged her tightly and oh, I wanted to hit Roger so bad, but I didn't. How could he do this to me? He took something precious from me and he was supposed to be my friend. Again, what could I do? He had the bottle. So he had Jeannie working like a dog. He had a huge house, maids, a Rolls Royce, everything he always wanted, even a pool. So I had to play it cool. He would keep Jeannie's bottle in his safe at the office when he was at work. I actually was ready to tell Jeannie I loved her and the words came out, but right as Dr. Bellows came in.
Anyways, I went to Roger's house and I played like I was happy for him and I got to see Jeannie and I told her that I had been lonely (and I was, I wasn't lying). So I told Roger I wanted his picture so I could "remember" him the way he "should be". So Jeannie blinked a picture for me by his pool (and of course Roger went for it, hook line and sinker). I took it to Dr. Bellows and showed it to him and Roger almost got canned. So he made a deal with me that he would give me anything I wanted if I would just get him out of trouble. So I told him I wanted Jeannie. I made it look real good. So he gave me the bottle and I had Jeannie come out right away. I couldn't wait to see her. She hugged me and I hugged her and it was wonderful. So I had Jeannie turn back time so Dr. Bellows and General Peterson would not remember anything and arrest Roger. Boy was he baffled. Haha—he had it coming. But he didn't care. He knew he'd been tricked, but so what. He had it coming.
Also, one day Jeannie wasn't feeling well and she was actually disappearing. It was something to do with something called "The Day of the Ram" and on that day, genies and their masters have to travel to Mecca, stand at a certain spot, face a certain way, lift my right arm with palm up and my left hand under my right elbow and I had to recite some sacred words to save Jeannie. I thought at first it was just superstitious junk, but she wasn't fooling. So we went to Mecca and had to break in the bank to stand at the correct spot and luckily we got it in time. She actually disappeared to nothing but I still recited the words and she reappeared. Anyways, I have my Jeannie with me and that's all I care about. She means so much to me and I just don't know what I would do with out her.
I can't believe my own stupidity. I should have known better. I just got Jeannie back from Roger when he stole her from me. Even with all that, I decided to lend her to him for a while (Nelson, you moron!!). I then found out that he was wearing Jeannie out. She was so tired she couldn't even hold her head up and that made me very upset. Boy was Roger surprised when I came out of her bottle instead of Jeannie. I came to see her and she blinked me into her bottle and Roger didn't know I was there. My poor Jeannie. She barely had the strength to keep her eyes open. Roger came in the kitchen to where her bottle was and "summoned" her out. I would take nothing for the look on his face when I came out. Jeannie barely woke up to smoke me out. Roger knew he had had it when he saw me. Roger is my pal, but I just wish he could be less greedy. I guess I got a little more defensive since Jeannie was involved. I wonder why.
Ok, my buddy Roger strikes again. He and I have been promoted to the rank of Major. I went in to work the other day and everyone was telling me congratulations. I couldn't even figure out why. I then found out that Roger and I were promoted to Major. He and I went on an assignment, and then as a treat, we were allowed to go to Reno for a few days. I knew better than to take Jeannie along. I know her tricks all too well by now.
Well my good buddy, Roger decides to outsmart me and he sneaks Jeannie along in his bag. I should have figured as much by the way he was acting. He tells me to bet his money and gets mad when I lose it. Then all of a sudden I'm winning and winning very well, for Roger that is. Why didn't I know better? Then he and I got pegged to be cheaters at the crap table and we nearly got into a mess of trouble. I gave him and Jeannie both a good lecture once I got them home. I know Jeannie only wanted the best for me and she was only trying to help. She's awfully cute that way. She looked at me the other day with the cutest look on her face when I was trying to tell her no about something and she just had to look at me with that face, that beautiful, sweet face that I could not resist.
Jeannie has done it again. She has tried to help me once again and again, I almost got into big trouble. Let's start with golf game. I never liked to play golf much nor was I any good at it. General Peterson called me one day to bring him some papers and Jeannie and I were about to go somewhere but I told her I had to go see General Peterson. First, she got upset and blinked me to the golf course where he was at in nothing but my shirt and tie, and no pants. No pants!! Oh no, Jeannie!! In she pops and she was nice enough to give me my clothes, thank goodness. This was about the only time Dr. Bellows didn't come along at the wrong time. Haha. Anyway, I gave General Peterson his stuff and then proceeded to wander around a bit. I saw a guy hitting golf balls and he offered me the chance. I said I couldn't play and he told me to try anyway. So I did and hit the ball as far as you could hit it. It took me a while to figure out Jeannie was behind it. Well she got me into it alright. General Peterson saw me hit it and he insisted that I be his golf partner against some folks he's been trying to beat for years. There was no way out of it. I left Jeannie home that day, but luckily, Roger felt sorry for me and went to my house and let her out. She came along at just the right time and helped me out and for once, I was glad. Well that was one down.
The Jeannie proceeds to turn a painting of mine into a real one. I was painting a copy of a Rembrandt picture and Jeannie got smart and blinked it into real Rembrandt and I was nearly sent to jail! Will she ever learn! So they flew in an art expert from Paris to look at the picture to determine if it was a real or a fake. So Jeannie does what she does best. She helps me out of the mess she gets me into, again. Well she got me out of trouble and I should have been furious, but I wasn't. How could I be? She was so sweet about it all. Thinking I should be in the clear, at least for a little while, I settled back.
She and I were at a museum one day and she sees a pair of slippers and goes nuts. These slippers belonged to an ancient princess, but obviously they belonged to Jeannie first and she insisted on getting them back. So what does she do? She gets them. Oh no not again! (Yes, again, Tony. You should know your own Jeannie by now.). Anyway, the museum put out the word out that the slippers were stolen. I knew I had to be in for it this time for sure. No matter what I said to Jeannie, it did no good. She would not give them back. I could not make her understand. Well I was finally able to snatch them when she got in the shower one day and I took them back to the museum. I later found out that Jeannie was the one behind them getting back in the showcase. She left them on my bed on purpose. Bless her heart. I guess I could've guessed I could count on her.
Then comes the dilly of them all. I was assigned to escort a princess around town and to my surprise, Jeannie was understanding. She was understanding alright, until she found out that the princess's family was Jeannie family's enemy. Jeannie was under oath to kill her. Oh no! Now what was I going to do! I did the only thing I could think of. I tricked her. I made her think I wanted a bunch of stuff and sent her off on a "blinking" mission. To my shock, she finished early and the princess was still here. Uh oh, I was really in trouble. She turned me into a chicken and put me in a cage. Luckily, Jeannie decided not to kill the princess. I was back to my old self again. I should have really let Jeannie have it, but I couldn't do it. She had to give me "the look" again. Oh well, I sure can't say life is dull with Jeannie around.
This last couple of days has been very, very interesting. I went into the kitchen the other day and when I opened my refrigerator, a pot fell off the top and hit me on the head. Let me add that what happened after that, I'm going on what Roger and Jeannie have told me.
I had gotten a letter from my aunt and she asked me if I would show a young lady around while she was in town. I was happy to oblige since this young lady didn't know anyone. Well, after I got hit on the head, the most beautiful girl I had ever laid my eyes on was standing right before me (yes, it was Jeannie). I thought it was the young lady my aunt told me about. I just couldn't believe my eyes. She was so beautiful. Roger thought I had completely lost it. I "introduced" him to Jeannie and he thought I was losing my mind. I didn't see why. After all, he had introduced me to plenty of girls that he met and "fell in love" with. Why couldn't he be happy for me? As far as I can tell from what they told me, I took Jeannie out and about over the next few days and I "fell in love" with her. I then asked her to marry me. Uh oh, big mistake.
I told Roger about it and asked him to be my best man and he went nuts saying I couldn't marry her because she was a real genie in a bottle. Now he had to be the one that was crazy, I thought. I was then told that I told Dr. Bellows how Roger was acting and Dr. Bellows almost learned the whole truth. It panned out in time. I obviously went back into the kitchen the day Jeannie and I were supposed to be married and another pot hit me on the head and I was back to the old me. I got all over Roger for "telling" Dr. Bellows that I was supposedly going to marry a genie in a bottle. Of course I got myself out of that one. Poor Roger. It was me, but luckily, General Peterson didn't go for any of it and I was once again in the clear. Something puzzles me though. How is it that when I didn't know who Jeannie really was when I had that spat with amnesia that I fell for her just like that? Could it be that I am really fall…. Nah it couldn't be. Could it?