1. Pre-School

He had only known her for one hour or more when he had decided he would marry her. She was pretty, not fairy-tale princess like but she had nice brown eyes that reminded him of Maltesers (his favourite sweet of the week) and she was a very nice person, he had seen her help someone up when they tripped. She was funny as well, he laughed at her knock, knock joke.

So getting all the courage he had, he walked up to her with all the confidence and pulled her hair.

"Ow! What was that for!" the little girl shouted looking upset and furious.

"Marry me" he demanded.


He pouted and looked at her with puppy eyes that had often got him his own way. "Please" he begged.

She bit her lip as she thought about it. "Only if you let me bury you in the sandbox" she decided, crossing her arms as her eyes dared him to say no.

"All right but you got to marry me afterwards"

So she buried him in the sandbox and then ran off before she had to marry him. After all he was an icky boy and she didn't want to marry an icky boy she wants to marry someone nice and lovely like her Daddy.

Billy was heartbroken that he got jilted, however the next day he found out his Mummy made friends with her Mummy and now they were playmates. He decided he had all eternity to make her his wife.

Also she stomped on his foot when he asked again.

2. Gummy Ring

They were seven and playing in the park. He had a bag of Haribo and pulled out a red/orange gummy ring. He wrinkled his nose at the girly-ness of it, from the corner of his eye he could see Ally skipping towards him, a grin formed as he had a plan.

He whirled round and bent on one knee. "Marry me Ally-Pally" he said.

Ally shrugged. "All right" she said, she thought all boys were icky, Billy the ickiest of them all but at least she knew him and knew she could hit him when he was naughty.

Billy slipped on the gummy ring and got up.

Ally didn't even think of eating it until she got home but unable to bring herself to eat her engagement ring, she licked it a couple times instead and then put it in her memory box.

3. To Cheer Her Up

He found her at what will be their bench in the future. She was crying quietly and he found the sight unbearable, after all this is Ally Love who didn't even cry when the nasty boy punched her arm, it was unnatural for her to cry. He sat down and fumbled in his pocket until he found a half crumpled and half dirty tissue, he passed it to her and she swatted it away.

"That's disgusting" she mumbled.

He huffed. "I was trying to be helpful" he muttered.

"You weren't you big berk" it was her new nickname for him and he had a feeling she won't stop calling him that. She sighed. "She's gone Billy, my Mum left me...and...And I know I have Dad...and Lynn...and Rowan...and Tor...and Grandma but...but" she sniffled. "I feel lonely"

Billy gave her a sad smile and wrapped an arm round her. "If you marry me I'll never let you be lonely"

She giggled at the child fantasy that she knew was never going to be real. They were nine and were already beginning to grow up.

"You big berk" she said fondly.

4. The Over-Dramatic One

They were fourteen and had only just started to kiss each other. They weren't really their first kiss, Ally had two failed kisses with two random almost boyfriends and Billy had two proper girlfriends, one being Ally's best friend Sandie where he had actually snogged them at one point. Despite all that kissing each other was somehow wonderfully special and they were doing it all over again when Ally suddenly felt her t-shirt being tugged, she turned round to see Ivy, her little sister looking up with her giant Malteser eyes.

"Ally" she whispered.

"Yes Ivy?" Ally whispered back.

"Are you going to marry Billy?"

"I don't know he hadn't asked" Ally said grinning.

Billy winked at her as he fell onto his knees and snatched up Ally's hands. "Oh Alexandra Love, love of my life, the meaning of my life, the reason I wake up in the morning to go to the loo" Ally groaned while Ivy giggled. "I love you with my very heart, my very soul, my very being. Will you do me the wonderful honour of being my wife...if you refuse I shall die at your feet!"

Ally considered it a moment. "Nah berks aren't my type of guy"

Billy clutched his hearts and made choking noises. "My...love...i...am...heart...broken..." he then collapsed at Ally's feet and pretended to be dead.

Ally laughed and rolled her eyes. She then kicked Billy lightly. "Come on you big berk get up"

Billy clutched Ally's feet. "Never! Not until you agree to marry me!"

Ally sighed. "I'll marry you when you win the lottery"

"Ok!" Billy said sitting up quickly.

It took him a whole day to realise he was tricked.

5. The Real Deal

They broke up three times. Once when they were sixteen due to the stress of exams, they got back together afterwards and spent the summer as if their relationship never ended...it was then when Ally and Billy started their sexual relationship. They broke up again due to the exams when they were eighteen, got back together very briefly for the summer but with Ally got to Bath for university and Billy planning to go for an internship at his father's office they decided to split.

They dated others but they were constantly sending each other insane text messages, writing strange comments on each other's Facebook and spent each and every Christmas mucking about together. Ally graduated and got a job in a magazine in London, she chose to live with her parents again. The house practically empty with just Tor and Ivy despite the amount of pets...the house was just quieter without Lynn and Rowan screaming at each other.

Billy met Ally at their bench as usual on Sunday morning. They gossiped and goofed off and then Billy suddenly turned round and kissed her.

"I missed you" he declared.

Ally blushed brightly. "Haven't been anywhere" she mumbled.

"There was no one else quite like you" Billy continued. "I love you, always and...I...well i..."

"Oh spit it out you big berk" Ally said rolling her eyes.


Ally blinked. "Sorry I didn't quite catch that" she said.

"I said will...will...willyoumarryme?"

Ally's lips twitched. "I am sorry but I don't understand berk you need to speak in English"


Ally laughed.

"I'm being serious here!"

Ally stopped laughing.

"I always was, even when I was mucking about...so...err...will you?"

Ally sighed; as usual Billy started to say something romantic only to fizzle out into embarrassment. It was something that she really thought he would outgrow but obviously not.

"Sure" she shrugged. "There's nothing else that I want to do more in my life than marry you"

"Really?" Billy asked hopefully.

"No" Ally said sarcastically, Billy visibly deflated and Ally rolled her eyes. "Of course I do you big berk!"