How Harry Did It
Harry was six the first time he learned he had super powers. And the only reason he knew why he had super powers was because of the comic books that Dudley read and then left laying about. His favourite had to be the Green Lantern. One, he was green. Two, he had a ring that could do all sorts of cool things. And three, Dudley hated him. For reasons yet to be discovered.
So, because Harry was so enamoured with his new super hero, he had tried to do cool things like said super hero.
The first time he floated Mrs. Wiggs's wig off of her head in the middle of class, he had been hooked. No one had figured out how he did it, but the little old lady was for some odd reason completely certain that it was Harry's fault.
They never found any proof.
The next time Harry managed to use his super cool powers was during Harry Hunting. Dudley and his gang had taunted him in the school yard until he'd snapped and started calling them dirty names back. Apparently fat people didn't like you calling them fat, because Harry had been running for it the moment he saw Dudley's face turn red.
Just when he was about to get caught, Harry had hid behind a trash can and wished with all his might to be anywhere but under Dudley's fists and feet for the rest of recess. After an odd squeezing sensation, he found himself on the roof, with no idea how to get down. The teachers didn't notice him until he'd had to resort to shouting after school for one of the departing adults' attention. Needless to say, they never figured out how Harry managed to get himself stuck on a roof when the access doorway was locked and there were no pipes around the school to climb up.
Harry managed many other super hero feats during his childhood. One, the Dursleys never had cold milk. The moment it was removed from the fridge, it was room temperature. Two, the weeds Harry pulled out of the garden would relocate themselves to the potted plants. Three, the television always broke during a teletubbies show.
Teletubbies were evil.
When 'the letter' finally came to admit Harry to super hero academy, he was ecstatic. Of course, he didn't know it right away, as Petunia managed to rip it out of his hands before he could open it, but a few well placed super tricks and he had a ticket to superdom.
The rest of the summer was excruciatingly painful. Harry kept checking off the dates on his calendar, but no one came to pick him up for weeks, and the letters kept coming. How was Harry supposed to stop the attack of the letters? Super powers could only do so much.
And then 'that man' came. The man with the scowl. The man with the greasy black hair. The man who swooped into the living room while the Dursleys were watching sitcoms and sneered so beatifically it Dudley peed his pants.
From that day forth, Harry pledged his allegiance to the sneer of sneers. He had a new superhero now.
Totally not what I usually write, but the plot bunnies wouldn't leave me alone, so I had to get it out. This is probably going to be a miniseries of interesting 'mysteries' at Hogwarts. :P