Jasper wasn't sure exactly how it all started.
All he knew was that every time it happened, it was going to mess things up. Even more than they had already been.
But oh god it felt so good.
Right now he didn't care. He didn't want to think about anything. He wanted to forget about how wrong it was. How many people were being affected.
He scrunched his eyes tight so he could block out everything else. The smell was earthy. He could still hear the leaves rustling through the trees. Just the fact they were so far away from reality, the life they knew, the boundaries. It would be enough to push him over the edge. But he can't let that happen. He has to hold on.
He could feel warmth building on his skin. It didn't belong to him, or even the person holding him up off the ground. It was friction. The constant rubbing together; it was making up for their own lifeless forms.
Maybe that was why it was so addictive. Their cold bodies start to heat up, and they feel as if the world would come to an end if they stopped. It made them feel human again; unlike the monsters they had become.
He couldn't even remember feeling like this back then. This felt so incredibly fulfilling, like it was closing the gaps between his body and mind. It all blended into one; colour, touch, thought, sound, emotion. Even though he didn't need to breathe, he couldn't help but gasp as the motion became harder, faster. All he could do was bite down on his lip to keep from screaming his name. Because that would mean it was all over. The only way they stayed so separate, were able to be so close, was if they forgot who they were.
He was gorgeous, no one could deny it. Sometimes it caught people off guard; especially Jasper. Especially when he would strip down in a frenzy of frustrated passion. The way he would tear off their clothes as if they were keeping him from everything he wanted. It was mind-blowing.
Mind-blowing. How appropriate for how he felt. He felt as if his mind was being wrenched into a million pieces. His life depended on the steady but increasing motion under him. In him…going through him? He wasn't even sure any more. They were one entity, defying time and space. Every colour ever felt was colliding, every shape and every texture. Every word ever spoken. It was all melding into one huge euphoric explosion.
No, it can't be over. He has to keep going.
Jasper wrapped his legs tighter around Edward's hips. His arms curled around his broad shoulders, anchoring him. He was now moving with him, not against him. Edward's hands moved up; tracing his lithe form intently. His intrepid fingers moved back and forth, mapping Jasper's every hill and valley. They slid higher up, slowing past his neck only to get tangled in his hair. His strangely seductive curls. The different colours acting as a magnet, drawing Edward in more and more every time he opened his eyes. It was different when he saw them this close. Sometimes he couldn't handle how beautiful they were. He needed to move faster. Push harder. He wanted to be one with him. Be a part of him. That hair was driving him crazy. He wanted to feel it in - no, through - his fingertips. His skin was getting in the way. He can't get close. He has to. Must.
Jasper could feel Edward getting tense. He was now jerking, thrusting harder and faster, harder and faster. As dangerous as it was, it left him feeling dazed. He should try to calm him down, stop him from getting too violent. But the mixture of pain and pleasure was overpowering him. Rational thought gave way. The tree bark was digging into his back and scraping against his skin. It made no sense how it aroused him so much, but a strangled moan escaped his lips. Now the floodgates were opened, and he started to voice all the suppressed cries of pleasure forbidden to be brought into existence.
Edward's grunting and groaning grew in volume, and deepened in emotion. He was desperate to find and reach his climax. But it was near impossible. He had no blood, no life in his body. He had to try harder. Push harder. He needed to get there. To break his physical limits. He needed to scream.
Out of pure instinct Jasper had begun to draw in breath irregularly. It was becoming increasingly ragged; he could hear Edward had been doing the same. His eyelids were fluttering frequently and he was having trouble telling which way was up. He felt as if the sunlight filtering through the leaves was burning holes into his skin. Every emotion he ever felt seemed to be swirling around him into one, and changing constantly. As he realised he was losing his grip on everything he ever knew, it all exploded into tiny shards of colour and sound.
The leaves seemed to rustle more violently, in keeping with the scream that echoed through the trees. Two distinct voices, both finding their peace of mind, both passing back into their known selves. Everything seemed still for a moment, slowly coming back into the norm.
Jasper was still seeing stars when he felt Edward slide out of him and help him back to the ground. He felt as if his legs would give way and he'd fall to the floor. It was almost as if he hadn't used them for a million years. But the tender hand laid on his arm caught him by surprise, seeming to lock his legs. He was almost immediately lost in those eyes looking at him intently. He wasn't too sure what emotions he was supposed to be reading. How he was even able to think was a miracle. His mind should have melted from it all. Never before has it been as intense, passionate, and amazing.
Edward pulled in close, brushing his lips against Jasper's in such a surprisingly loving way he was frozen into place. Without any word or even thought, he pulled his clothes on and left the startled - still naked - male on his own.
This was definitely getting worse. Soon everything would fall apart. Edward never showed that kind of caring to someone he'd just been using as stress relief. They couldn't do this, and no one could ever know what they'd already done.
Jasper pulled his shirt on and started to walk away, his usual far-away look returning to his eyes. He briefly turned around and looked at the tree they'd violated in their passionate rendezvous. He allowed his mouth to curl up into a small smile.
But it was worth it.