Disclaimer : I don't own it.

Summary : Ratchet and Kendra celebrate his first Easter with an egg hunt. One-shot, complete. Fifth story after 'A Very Jazzy Easter', and quite possibly the final in the mini-series. Ratchet/OC pairing.

Note : Kendra is an OC, and there's a hint of a romantic pairing with her and Ratchet. Also, the term 'no injury' I believe is used in another fiction, but I can't remember the name. It was 'no injury' or 'no harm' and I am going to be using it briefly, so I own no claim to it.

This isn't going to be easy for me to write, as I don't really know Ratchet all that well. I've only watched the second movie twice, and I haven't been able to find the first movie to buy it.

Legend :



(Scene/POV Changes)


(Ratchet and kendra, Kendra's POV)

As Ratchet pulled into the main docking bay of the base, I hopped out and went to grab a packed crate of eggs. It wasn't a hard job, but this was a portion of the base where the Autobots were nothing more than rumor, and Ratchet had to stop some distance away and pretend to be a normal Search and Rescue hummer.

That left me to dodge young cadets who were playfully wrestling around, to get over to the crate. Sideswipe and Sunstreaker pulled up next to Ratchet, using their holoform drivers to blend in before the holoforms disappeared, leaving it to look like all three vehicles were left there.

As I grabbed the medium crate, I turned and began walking over.

"No harm." The tone was robotic, sounding more like an automated alarm or something, than anything else. It was Ratchet's way of trying to tell the soldiers to smarten up, without beaning them in the head with a wrench. When they continued to ignore him and wrestled closer, I watched him sink down on his axels a little, almost invisibly, if the person didn't know what to look for. "No harm." The tone was stronger and a hint of irritation broke through.

For a moment, I debated on staying away for a few moments in order to allow them some time to fool around, so that I could watch Ratchet's reaction, but a pissed off medic is something I really didn't want to deal with. He might not take a wrench to the back of the heads of humans, but he could still think up some pretty awkward punishments either way.

I bit my lip to keep a giggle in as I approached the back of the hummer. The back slid open on it's own volition, luckily no one was looking, and I slid the crate in. Chains then slid around the box, securing it in place, before I backed off and the door slid shut. Gently, I ran my hand over the back, and I felt the hummer shudder at my touch as I walked around to the passenger side, sliding my fingers over every crevice I could reach.

I knew the Autobots were sensitive, and I thoroughly enjoyed bugging Ratch every chance I got. I loved the way he'd shiver or shake, and how he sometimes would sink down, practically melting into my touch.

"No harm..." The tone was even louder, and I could barely make out the sound of Ratchet's vents cycling in a sigh as the soldiers continued to wrestle by his side. One then bumped into his passenger door hard, and then pushed his attacker off. Standing there, he obviously wasn't expecting retaliation from behind, so when Ratchet's door flew open, knocking the soldier face first into Sunstreaker's hood...

I bit my lip harder, and blinked back tears as I struggled not to laugh. My body shook, even as Sunstreaker gave off an indignant 'Hey!!', and covered my mouth, trying to keep the resulting hysterics at bay.

"No harm... Insolent sparklings!" That was almost whispered, and I lost my war over my laughter.

Dashing around to the driver side of the hummer, I patted the door that opened for me, and slid into the driver's seat before belting up and placing my hands on the wheel. Ratchet did the rest, but it must have looked odd for a girl who was laughing her ass off to be driving as well as we were.

"You'll pay for that, Hatchet!" Sunstreaker shouted through the radio, before Ratchet conveniently turned on some music. Some loud music.

"You really did ask for it." I added in, with a final giggle, as I wiped my tears away. "You damaged his paint job."

Ratchet seemed to shake a little in laughter before a snort sounded in the hummer. "If he tries anything, I'll send him into forced recharge and paint him hot pink."

I could just see it, too, and as an added bonus, Sideswipe painting white flowers all over the sleek lamborghini body. A fresh wave of laughter shot through me at that, and I brushed my shoulder length dark brown hair out of my face.

"Why again are we going on an egg hunt? It's a waste of time, in my opinion."

"Yes, but you heard Optimus' orders. We all need to give it a try. Besides, at least you guys don't need to do the massive feast, or even eat the eggs." With a raised eyebrow, I watched as Ratchet pulled off the highway and into an empty warehouse district.

"Eggs are an excellent source of-"

"I know!" I cut him off with a sigh. "You already told me." With a smirk, I hopped out of the hummer and took a look at a nearby warehouse more than big enough to house him standing, in his bipedal form. "Wait here." I went to the back and grabbed the box before heading into the warehouse and began hiding them. Once I was done, I called Ratchet in and had him transform.

I watched as gears shifted and his limbs began to appear. He was a tall robot, though not as tall as Optimus, and was a bright yellow, obviously. As he stood in front of me, I went over the rules.

"You look with your eyes-err optics, and not your sensors." Raising an eyebrow, I watched as he seemed to regard me a moment before nodding. "Ok? Go for it!"

With a sigh, Ratchet began to look around. His optics scanned the roof carefully, eyeing every beam almost suspiciously. I had to point out to him that I couldn't reach that high before he decided to take into account my size and where I could reach reasonably.

He reached out and found one on a beam, but then hesitated. He seemed to be considering something before he picked it up and carefully reached down to hand it to me. "How is this fun?"

"It's, uh...really kind of a kiddie thing." I muttered, as I reached out for the egg. Unfortunately, Ratchet looked away as I reached out, and when he felt my hand brush against his, let go of the egg. I didn't have a hold of it yet. I fumbled to grab it, but it hit the ground and shattered, splattering my legs with egg goop. "Oh, ewww! Ratch!" I glared at him as he spun to me and his optics widened almost comically.

"I thought you had it!"

"Obviously not! You weren't even watching!" I put my hands on my hips and bit my lip, struggling to keep looking serious. While egg goop on my shoes and the ankles of my jeans was nasty, the opportunity to mess with Ratchet was so worth it! Folding my arms over my chest, I heaved a sigh. "Nice one, by the way."

"The eggs should have been hard boiled." He frowned a little. "You are unharmed." He wasn't asking. He seemed apologetic, but not very. "I hardly see what the problem is. You should be careful, though, that you don't slip on the mess on the floor."

Frowning, I raised both eyebrows. "Whether or not I'm harmed isn't the point." Turning, I began to search around until I grabbed an egg. "If I was to break this over you, even if you were unharmed, would you be happy?"

His optics narrowed. "You wouldn't dare."

"I don't have cannons to weld to my ass, or armor to paint bright pink." I shot back as I gently tossed the egg up in the air and caught it again.

Optics narrowed even more. "I... Um, perhaps we should get back to the search?" He turned slowly and made a show of searching for more eggs. When he found one, he carefully put it on the ground by my feet, refusing to meet my eyes as he did.

With a nod of my own, I turned to head to the box and put the egg inside. Messing with Ratchet can be so much fun. When I turned back, there were three on the ground waiting for me, and I made my way to putting them all back in the box. At least I knew he'd know I wasn't all that serious.

I turned to go back for more and paused with a start, finding Ratchet standing almost right over me. He stood before me in holoform, and held an egg in each hand. Ratchet's holoform was a good looking young man about his mid twenties, with light, piercing blue eyes, sandy blonde hair, fair skin, and a pair of silver wire framed glasses. He was about six feet tall and lean, with a hint of muscle.

He walked past me to put the eggs into the box before turning to me, looking sincerely apologetic. "I...apologize about the egg." He reached out and brushd a lock of hair behind my ear before leaning in and pressing his lips to mine gently.

Returning the kiss eagerly, I leaned into him. When I pulled back, I was smirked. "Forgiven, but you know... That egg crap's gonna be inside you later." Hearing what I'd just said, my gutter mind kicked into gear, and I blushed. "Uhm... Egg, hunt!" I ducked my head as Ratchet grinned knowingly. "Get back to work, mister!" Giving him one more kiss, I watched as his holoform disappeared and I turned back to the box.

Then I heard a sound that guaranteed a certain Autobot was going to offline in his recharge tonight.

Thud, crack!

I froze where I was standing. Feeling a warmth hit me in the head, I ducked and jumped a little, even as I felt the warmth running through my hair and down the back of my neck. "Ratchet." Looking up slowly, I was about to tear him a new one when I caught sight of something unexpected.

Standing almost directly over me was Ratchet. The yellow 'bot's optics were narrowed and filled with unbridled anger. One hand was free, but the other hand held two eggs in it, carefully. Very slowly, his mouth opened, and his optics flashed dangerously. What really caught my attention, however, was the trail of egg goop sliding slowly down his face, the yolk sliding right down the center of his forehead.


Looking past him, I saw a familiar robotic face peering down from a window on the ceiling, with a wicked smirk written across his face and mischevious blue optics. Shaking my head, I sighed and closed my eyes, even as Sunstreaker laughed loudly.

"Told you you'd pay!" He called before taking off.

With a low growl, Ratchet murmured darkly in the high pitched whirls and clicks of his native tongue, no doubt swearing harshly enough to make Megatron blush, and he closed his own optics. "Hot pink. Or better yet, a whole bunch of mismatched colors, with obscene images. Then I'll weld his pistol to his aft in just such a way, that when he transforms, he'll shoot himself in the-"

I tuned out the plotting after a moment and sighed as I sat on a nearby box. Bracing my head in my hand, I watched Ratchet pace back and forth, allowing the eggs in his hand to drop to the ground.

So much for the egg hunt.


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