This my entry for the Love Through Lemons contest. I have spent a really long time on this so I hope people enjoy it! The bolded and italicized words at the beginning are lyrics to "Goodbye Apathy" by OneRepublic. I had the idea for a one shot with inspiration from this song a while ago. Then, I saw this contest and decided it would be the perfect way to try it out.

Love Through Lemons Contest

hosted by tby789 and LolaShoes

We all love Twilight LOVE, we all love Twilight LEMONS. How easy is it to convey one without the other? Show us! We're hosting a contest for stories that powerfully communicate love through smut. The rules are simple:

No use of the word "love" or any synonyms (i.e. adore, worship, anything else you find on thesaurus(dot)com). That also means no references to lovey feelings or even thoughts of saying "I love you."

- All pairings welcome

- M Rating required

- 5,000 word limit

- To enter, send a PM with the link to your story to either LolaShoes or tby789

- Contest entries must be received no later than July 20, 2009 12:01AM PST

POV: Edward

Rating: M

Words: 3,435


I don't walk right, no

Not like I used to

There's a jump in my step

As I rush to see you

This strange man had finally made me forget about my once focused feelings on the words "I don't care." I don't even know how he had done it. But, here I stand, on his front porch, about to confess this fact to him. I'm not entirely aware of how I got here and I am definitely sure I don't possess the courage to go through with spilling my guts out to him. But damn it, I had to do SOMETHING! I might die otherwise, which was simply not a valid option. Maybe I wouldn't actually have to say anything. That sounded promising.

For the last three months I had been avoiding his advances, treating him as little more than pond scum. How horrible and heartless was I. Recently, my subconscious had been flirting with the idea that maybe I didn't hate him, I was just unsure of him, and scared out of my wits that he might be just another callous asshole. But really, after all of the shit I had put him through, and he still wouldn't just drop out of my life, that had to mean something about him. He was certainly persistent.

These subconscious thoughts were horribly dangerous and posed a threat of tearing down my carefully built walls. Walls I had put up to keep people out. As if that wasn't enough, I also made sure to run from anything resembling a worthy suitor. Running was easy, familiar, and painless. It was how I stayed numb; numb to everything, like the sensation caused by a local anesthetic. This particular painkiller, or in my case pain-saver, was making a cold, dead, unfeeling lump out of what was once a human. My heart now resembled a piece of coal, like Christmas for the naughty girl all year long. Who deserves that I ask you, who?

But speaking of my naughty girl side, I Bella Swan, was here to show the relentless Edward Cullen that his efforts weren't wasted and I had somehow come to my senses where he was concerned. I just had to knock on his door….

Which brings me back to where I started, staring dumbly at his front door, searching for how best to go about this. It might have been better to have a plan before driving over here, but who knows how long that would have taken. I came here on impulse and with a purpose. If I had sat around to think about it, I would have chickened out. It had been a good five minutes of hard thinking just standing here and I had gotten absolutely no where. Finally I decided I had nothing to lose. Edward had all but given up his last shred of dignity trying to win me over. He hadn't crawled on his knees yet, but I feared that would soon come if I didn't end this. The least I could do was show him the same courtesy.

My shaky fist rose to the door of its own accord while a small voice somewhere in my head screamed for just a little more time. Please it begged, and I promptly ignored it, knocking three times hard on his door before I could be dissuaded. Panic flooded me as I waited for him to answer the door and I momentarily considered bolting. Just as I was beginning to believe that idea had some merit, Edward's door flew open and his features were posed into a slightly shocked expression.

When he finally spoke, his tone matched his facial expression. "Bella? What are you doing here?"

"Yes it's me," I told him sharply. "Is that any way to greet the woman you've been chasing for months?"

He gaped at me for a few seconds longer before I sighed loudly. "Are you going to let me in or not?" I demanded. I sure wasn't being any nicer to him and I know he had to be wondering how necessary it was for me to track down his home, just to give him a tongue-lashing. If only he knew the things I really wanted to do to him with my tongue.

Shaking his head to clear it, Edward stepped aside and opened the door wider. "Yeah sorry, come on in. I'm just really surprised to see you. Why are you here?" he asked yet again. Maybe he had gotten over me. Why is it always something with me?

"I guess I shouldn't have come, I knew this was a bad idea…." My voice trailed off as I turned abruptly to run with my tail between my legs. If he was done with me then there was really no need for me to be offering myself up on a silver platter.

"Woah, where ya goin?" he asked. "Not so fast, I've waited for this for too long." As he spoke, he caught my hips with his hands and I froze. His hands felt wonderful there against my jeans. I knew I was blushing but I turned around to meet his gaze anyway. "Are you finally giving in Bella?" his tone was now mocking and he had that damn smirk in place that made my heart flutter. That was one of the many things I had been ignoring about him, hoping to never recognize how attracted to him I was.

"Don't mock me please or I might regret coming here." I averted my eyes as I spoke so as to keep up the haughty attitude. Once I looked him in the eye, it would be the end of line for me.

"Still with the attitude? Is it really necessary anymore? You did just show up on my doorstep." The smirk never left his face, even as he bent close to my ear to whisper "Your secret is out Bella Swan. You want me as much as I want you, so don't lie to me anymore. Game over."

My eyes fluttered closed at the closeness of our bodies and my head tilted back in a small shudder of pleasure. Oh the things this man was doing to my body and we hadn't even gotten started yet. God help me.

I turned my head slightly to return his whisper, make him shudder, and hopefully keep myself from losing it completely. I had to keep the upper hand. Did I even have the upper hand? "Then why are we still talking Mr. Cullen?"

He chuckled at my question and his breath tickled my neck. If he didn't hurry up and make a move I was going to jump him and I really wanted him to do the work. No need to look that desperate. "So it's going to be like that, huh?" Edward's tone was light as his fingers brushed across my skin, pulling the strap to my tank top down my shoulder.

"After this long of waiting, it is definitely going to be like that," I informed him in a husky voice.

"Alright then," he muttered. Edward's head dropped down to my shoulder as he placed gentle kisses on my skin, setting my whole body on fire. I sighed quietly and his tongue darted out of his mouth, running across my collar bone. I tilted my head to the side to make it easier on him. Warm, soft lips continued up my neck and over my jaw line with expertise. Finally, his face was in front of mine again and I looked at him from beneath my eyelashes.

"I've waited so long for this Bella, so very long." He spoke these words as a confession and I had to hold myself back from tackling him in his foyer. He brought his hand up to cup my cheek and gently brushed my lips once with his thumb.

We both inhaled sharply at the brief contact before he swooped in and kissed me with more force than I had ever known from a kiss. Before I knew what had happened, our tongues were battling and my fingers were laced into the soft hair at the nape of his neck. Edward was pulling me tightly against his rock hard body and my legs flew up to wrap around his waist. Even with every inch of our bodies pressed tightly to one another, it wasn't enough for me. Judging by the tightening of Edward's arms around my body, it wasn't enough for him either.

"Would you like to go somewhere more comfortable?" he forced out. I was trailing my lips and tongue down the column of his neck before coming back up and biting his ear. Edward could barely speak from the sensation of my kisses; score one for me.

"Take me where you want me," I teased in a whisper. I felt him shudder against me.

"Fuck…," he breathed out. The next thing I registered was my body bouncing against his slightly as he journeyed up his stairs. His tongue massaged mine and my hands were now roaming over the muscles in his back and shoulders. He was moaning in low tones and my mouth was catching them. The vibrations were delicious.

I felt Edward stop walking but I was too busy with his mouth to take notice of where we might be. Then he tossed me off of him into a plush and velvety smooth abyss. This had to be the most comfortable bed in the world, which made it perfect to have sex on.

When I adjusted my eyes to the dark room, I was just in time to watch Edward reveal his beautifully sculpted chest to me as he peeled his shirt off of his body. The fabric was quickly tossed aside and forgotten as he bent over me with a hungry look in his eyes. My tongue subconsciously flitted between my lips in anticipation. His eyes were dark with an animalistic tinge, but still tender. I'd never seen anyone look at me like that and it made my stomach flip-flop in anticipation.

His fingers nimbly felt for the hem of my shirt before pulling the obtrusive item over my head and then abruptly stopping, eyes fixed on my breasts. I almost couldn't handle how intense his gaze was and yet I thirsted for him to look at me like this for the rest of my existence. Slowly his hands splayed across my stomach.

"It's so soft," he mumbled. I knew there was a reason I put lotion on like it was part of my religion. Edward's hands slid to my back before bending his head to my chest. I arched my back into his mouth. I could feel him drawing wet trails with his tongue along the edge of the cup on my bra. He unhooked my bra and his hands came up to my shoulder as he slid the straps down my arms. His mouth never left my skin and soon he was swirling my nipples in his mouth, biting down gently every once in a while. He was literally making a meal out of me and I only urged him on by pressing my hands against the back of his head. I encouraged Edward by groaning and whimpering as he feasted.

"Oh God, Edward," I finally confessed. He was making me feel so good and I felt him smile against my skin.

I decided it was my turn. I grasped the sides of his face between my palms and pulled his face up to mine. My lips attached quickly to his and I pushed on his shoulders to make him roll over. Edward obliged and I rolled with him, straddling his hips. I pushed lightly on his chin, making him tilt his head. The tip of my tongue ran over his Adam's apple before I began sucking in various places across his neck. I traced his ear too before blowing warm air onto the wet spot. His breath hitched a moment before I bit down on his ear lobe which caused a rapid increase in his breathing. I was ridiculously impressed with my own abilities by now.

I shimmied down his body a bit before attacking his chest with a fervor to rival his own. I nibbled on his skin and then soothed it with my tongue. I continued on his stomach and then dragged my tongue across the skin where it met his jeans. Edward's back arched slightly off of the mattress beneath me as I smiled to myself. Flicking open the button his jeans and then lowering the zipper, I noticed he was holding his breath in anticipation.

Edward lifted his hips slightly and I wriggled the jeans down and off of his legs. A nice tent had formed in his boxers by now and I couldn't help but stare at it. His size was more than adequate and my body ached to be filled by him. I crawled back up his body at a painful pace and made sure to graze him with my breasts as I moved.

When I was finally even with him again, he was tired of waiting and flipped me onto my back, moving in between my legs. Edward took both of my hands, kissed the back of them gently, and placed them above my head on the mattress. Soft fingertips ghosted down my arms, over my breasts, and down my sides before settling on my hips. He teased me with barely-there kisses while undoing my jeans.

Removing my jeans swiftly, he began covering the undiscovered parts of my body with languid movements of his lips and tongue. My legs had never before been given this much attention. He was driving me crazy by taking his time like this. I was whimpering quietly, causing him to raise his eyes to mine.

"Patience, Bella. I will not rush this, I've been dreaming about it for too long to waste it." Edward's voice was also quiet, but forceful. I merely nodded in response. He covered both legs before blowing his warm breath onto my panties. I could feel it through the thin fabric and each new thing he did to me made it harder to just lay here while he worked.

Finally, just before I thought I might explode from waiting, Edward's fingers hooked through my panties at the sides of my hips and pulled them leisurely down my leg. Where was his pent-up frustration he had to be feeling? How was he being so calm, collected? Damn him, damn him to hell.

But that's when I felt the most amazing thing in the world. Edward's tongue was probing my wet folds and I felt the vibrations of his moans on my skin. His tongue swept up and down my slit before settling on my clit. While massaging my most sensitive area, two fingers slid into my opening and I gasped at the sensation.

"Oh Edward, that feels so good. Please….please don't stop," I begged. I always held my own until now, always. Normally, I would be very displeased with losing control like this, but how could I possibly be upset when it felt this damn good!

His thumb picked up the work of his tongue as he continued to pump his fingers in and out of me. Edward kissed my inner thighs for a moment before looking me in the eye.

"Do you like my tongue on you Bella?" he asked in a husky voice, a tone that only caused more heat to flood between my legs.

"Oh God yes," I breathed. He chuckled darkly before bringing his tongue back to my center. Just as I felt that I might topple over my edge of sanity, he abruptly stopped and came up to lie next to me on his side. My eyes fluttered open and I glared at him.

"Damn you," I cursed him. How dare he make me feel that good and then just stop before I could cash in on it!

Edward chuckled lightly before speaking "You didn't really think I'd let you cum without me did you?"

"Fine," I huffed. He was still laughing as he melted my anger away with just his kiss. I turned him onto his back and slithered down his body. I didn't feel like being gentle and slow as he had done with me. I ripped off his boxers and greedily devoured his stiff member.

"Bella," he hissed through his teeth. Edward's hands flew to my head, weaving his fingers into my hair. I swirled my tongue around the tip and bobbed my head up and down on him. His breathing sounded labored and I moaned against him, causing him to shudder beneath me. There was nothing like having power over a man, this man in particular. I began using my hand on the part of him my mouth couldn't reach and pushed down on him as fast as I could before going slow and teasing him just a little. My eyes were locked with his, both gazes hungry for the other.

I could feel him tensing beneath me, so I released him with a pop and gave him a devilish smile. "Turnabout is fair play, asshole."

Now he was glaring at me. Edward sat up with lightning speed and pressed me into the sheets. "No more games Bella. I can't take it anymore." With that, he pushed into me and stopped there, his eyes boring into mine. "I'm going to make you forget your name," he vowed.

Edward slammed into me with more enthusiasm than I thought was possible. I cried out, arching into him, and pulling his head down to my neck. Lightly biting my skin, he heightened my arousal and my moaning became louder.

"Edward," I chanted. His hot breath fanned across my skin and he sucked a nipple into his mouth, treating it like it was his favorite piece of candy. My hips were moving into his now, meeting each and every thrust, giving him everything I had.

"Fuck, Bella," he mumbled against my skin. "You're so tight. God, you're going to kill me."

I wanted some control of the pace now, so I pushed his shoulders until he spun over, taking me with him. I braced my hands on his chest before beginning to move up and down on him. Edward's eyes rolled back in his head and the most guttural sound I have ever heard slipped from his lips. I didn't know until just then that he could possibly be any more attractive. It was nice to be proved wrong.

My movements became frantic as I sought out release and his hands were aiding my movement by pushing on my hips. Every movement was accentuated by a groan and his hands drifted up my body to cup my breasts.

Much to my dismay, he halted our movements again right before I could take the dive. My hips were held tightly against his and I just stared, wondering what he was up to now. He gazed up at me for a moment and I felt lost in him. He pulled me down to him and kissed me chastely, wrapping his arms around my body. I drifted onto my back and he began moving in me again, but much slower than before, kissing me deeply. Our lips broke apart after a few moments and his cheek came to rest against mine. Edward whispered my name in my ear, over and over again. My fingers roamed over his back, sometimes gripping, and sometimes caressing.

Edward angled his hips upward and hit my most sensitive spot, causing my body to jerk.

"That's it Bella," he told me. "Cum for me now, let me hear it."

His words and increased thrusting sent me into oblivion and I screamed his name. It was the best orgasm I had ever experienced. He soon followed after, shuddering above me. After we caught our breath, he moved out of me and collapsed beside me.

As we lay there tangled in his sheets, both catching our breath, Edward rolled on his side towards me. "Will you let me take you out to dinner now?" he asked.

I couldn't help the laugh as it seeped from my lips. "That's the least you could do," I joked with him. We smiled at each other for a few more moments before I lowered my voice and propositioned him. "Up for round 2 Cullen?"

"Always," he replied. His face lit up with my new favorite smirk as his lips descended on mine once more. Why had I ever denied him?