Disclaimer: I am back again! I was just in another mood to write, so here it is! I don't own the characters. I hope you enjoy it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~"You're lucky if your memory remains."~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I stood there and wept, with my reflection mocking me in all its weakness. The redness surrounding my eyes stood stark against such a white canvas. I saw her eyes widen when I entered the hall, I saw her mouth quiver for a moment.
I can barely live with what I have done, what I have yet to do.
I quickly run my damp fingers through my knotted locks and try to pretend the shaking is from the cold. I live in the dungeons for Merlin's sake! Crying and sniveling in the girls restroom was not what I had planned for this year. I thought I was going to sweep through the halls and feel the conviction settle warmly in my stomach.
Instead, I am filled with death, destruction, chaos, and hate. Hate for myself and everything I thought I stood for. But that no longer matters; I am to become the grim reaper. I am nothing but a death eater, fore the mark burns black through every robe I throw on to cover it.
I feel it with every breathe I take and every breath I try to still.
Staring at the thing I have becomes sickens me, retching follows me everywhere I go. A small bite of life and I end up flushing it down the toilets. If I wasn't such a coward I would stop all of this, stop lying to myself and admit I am going to die for a cause I no longer believe in.
But I am a coward, so I'll just stand here and try not to drown myself in the nearest sink. Its funny how fast things change and how we really should think twice before wishing on those stars.
I have wanted this my whole life, but I never wanted this.
There are a handful of moments I wish I could change, would do anything to alter. But I was lied to, told that if I walked this path I would get the glory I deserved. I thought I deserved so much, the whole bloody world.
But now I know what I deserve.
When I heard a rustle of movement, I knew it was you. It was always you, Potter. And I tried to hide everything in a snarl and a broken vile. You believed me, as usual, and threw hexes my way just like I knew you would.
So, yes, as I lay in my own pool of blood I can say it.
I deserve this.
~~~~~~"When there is nothing left to burn, you have to set yourself on fire."~~~~~~~~~
I am not sure if this even makes sense. It is very choppy and not written very well. But I wrote it in five minutes, just a nagging that was in my head. I hope it was too awful. Please review!