Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note or Terraria.

Characters: Mello, Matt

Genre: Humor


"Matt, can I talk to you?"

Evidently Matt wasn't too deeply submerged in the world of Terraria yet, because he quickly walled his character in for safety and then gave Mello his full attention. "Yeah? What's up?"

"A lady on the street gave me this pamphlet." He looked at it for a long moment before handing it to Matt. He looked away as Matt read it.

"'Change is possible with the love of-' Mello! This is an ex-gay program!"

Mello still wouldn't meet Matt's eye. "Yeah."

"Are you thinking about... going to this?"

He just shrugged.

"I mean, you're my best friend, Mels, so whatever you choose is fine... but..."

"But?"

"I dunno. You hear bad things about these places, you know? Suicide and stuff."

A little bit of Mello's natural cockiness leaked through his discomfort and half a smirk found its way to his lips. "Like I would ever actually kill myself. Me."

"I think," Matt said calmly, "that if you went to a place for two months where every day they told you you're bad and wrong, you might start to consider it." He handed the pamphlet back.

"That will never happen." Mello's voice was firm. "All that will happen is I'll come back straight."

"And the world will be thrown into chaos," Matt mumbled.

"What was that?"

"Hm?"

"What you just mumbled."

"Mumbled?"

Mello rolled his eyes. "Look. If random old ladies are walking up to me and giving me ex-gay pamphlets, I figure I should look into it. Okay? I'm gonna go."

"Like I said, whatever you want to do," Matt replied carefully. "Just know that you can come home at any time, right?"

"I get on the plane in a week."

"See you in a week and two days."

"What?"

"Nothing at all."


Matt didn't know a lot of things, but the one thing he did know was Mello. A week and two days later, on the dot, had a skinny blond boy appearing on the doorstep with his suitcase, looking sullen. ...More sullen than usual.

The gamer grinned as he opened the door. "Missed you. You straight now?"

"No," he replied shortly, pushing past Matt to get inside.

"Good. They kick you out?" he tried again, taking Mello's bag away from him and to his room.

"No."

"They give up on you?"

"No, Matt!"

"Then why are you back so soon?"

"...Because I accidently un-converted all the counselors..."