Disclaimer: I don't own. I really wish I did though…it's good to dream… right?
Warnings: Implied Jack/Ianto, swear words. Hopefully characters will not be OOC.
A/N: First Fic! This came to me at the spur of the moment while I was reading…Hopefully it's humorous because we ALL need it thanks to RTD. Enjoy!
People seem to enjoy Ianto's hair, and Ianto enjoys it too. The softness and beautiful color of the hair seems to draw out the vivid-ness of his blue eyes. Lisa enjoyed it whenever he would gel it of a faux-hawk creating a more "model-like appearance" to her exact words, as he recalled once. During that day he 'strutted' up and down the park's stairs leading to the fountain. She jokingly pulled out her camera and took some pictures. Those pictures he still had in the bottom of his dress drawer, not that he didn't want to put them out for show. It was just that it was the little reminders of her that he enjoyed once in awhile, but didn't want to be caught looking at them because of the whole 'I-kept-my-girlfriend-down-in-the-basement-as-a-half-converted-cyberman-incident'. Jack almost craves Ianto's hair. Whenever Ianto would be sitting near him, and Jack was sitting back relaxing, the Captain would be twirling his hair constantly, just to feel the softness of it. The third night back after Jack was gone for three months, Jack petted, actually petted, Ianto's hair for 20 minutes before they got down to, well….business.
Ianto woke up to the annoying beeping of his alarm clock. His eyes lingered upon the ceiling, giving him a few minutes before he got out of bed. His hands met the duvet and pealed it off his body, before he was going to take a shower. He closed the window to his right, confused. Did I even leave this open last night? Its 35 degrees outside! , thought Ianto, before he turned off the annoying scream of the alarm. Putting on his robe, he quickly walked to the kitchen to grab a coffee. After a few minutes of sipping the delight of his own brew, Ianto decided to take a shower to get rid of his night sweats do to his everlasting nightmares that come back to haunt him.
Quickly turning the shower on he hopped in, not bothering to look in the mirror, because he knew he would grimace at the horrible way he looked: scraggily five o'clock shadow, with his face masked with sweat. Not a beautiful sight. The water was warm and a nice treat from sleeping, apparently, in the cold fall. Ianto picked up a brand new bottle of shampoo. Ianto looked confused. I don't remember buying this brand. What is it?
"Letterman's Shampoo: The Absolute Best for Recently Dyed Hair," he said as it the words lingered on his tongue. It didn't click to him. "Well," he continued, "it's not always good to let this go to waste, even though I picked up the wrong shampoo," Finishing up, the water was turned off and Ianto toweled off his hair before letting the towel return to his waist, securing it tightly before heading off to the mirror. The fog engrossed the mirror, making Ianto wipe it off with his hand. Looking down at the sink, he found his shaver, and shaving cream. Splashing some icy cold water on his face to wake him up he looked in the mirror, to arrive at a ghastly site. He screamed.
There was a light shuffle from outside his door, and Ianto, with a panicked expression, went over to see who it was, just incase none of his teammates saw him in this state. He saw someone else instead.
"Bore dda, Ianto!" Mrs. Livingston said with a cheery face on. It was 6 AM in the morning and she was already dressed and ready to spend the day.
"Bore dda, Mrs. Livingston," he sighed, still getting over the panic.
"I like what you did with your hair! I'm so glad that you are taking a risk; I don't think you ever done that in your life! Reminds me what I should do with mine, maybe a blue tint, yeah?" she questioned.
"Sure. Go crazy," he said, trying to be nice, but throwing a hint of sarcasm in it.
"Thanks for the advice," Mrs. Livingston smiled, obviously not noticing the sarcasm. "Well, enjoy your work day, and tell your boyfriend that when he takes you out on another date, make him wear real clothes, not his dolt clothing. Be the man. Have a good day!" Mrs. Livingston walked down the stairs after she winked at him.
"Crazy old lady," whispered Ianto, after closing the door. Still in a towel, he ran over to his closet. Now, now, now, what am I going to wear? There is nothing that can wear with this mess on my head, maybe not a suit. Much to Ianto's disagreement, he was now wearing faded skinny jeans, a Rolling Stones t-shirt, and black and white plaid converse shoes, another one of Jack's crazy fetishes. Ianto dug around in the closet and found a brown and white fedora, tucked in the back. It was his only fedora, but you can see him wear it in almost every college party photo that his friends took.
After finishing his last cup of coffee for himself, seeing that the team won't need their fix until 10 in the morning, Ianto grabbed his stopwatch, and gun putting it in the holster around his waist. He headed out the door, jacket draped on his arm, and the keys to his car in hand.
The car ride was long enough, through embarrassment and shame. He had the fedora on, but the back of the head was still showing color; vibrant parading color that stuck out underneath his hat, possibly giving the diver behind him a headache. Ianto was still confused on the fact that whoever did this, because he would have known if he had chosen to dye his hair, even this color. He parked his car in the Torchwood parking lot, just a few spaces from the SUV. Ianto took a deep breath, and hope every one would just look away and not comment.
The cog door sounded as Ianto walked in. It's 7 AM and everybody is here?! Shit.
"Hello Ianto!" greeted Gwen. "Why are you not wearing a suit today? Boss' orders," she laughed, but then continued. "I'm just kidding, but you should keep up with this façade, it's nice. You look…normal," she smiled and he smiled back. "Could you get me a coffee, if that's not a problem?"
"Sure Gwen," Ianto half-smiled. With long strides he headed over to the kitchenette. Tosh turned around in her swivel chair, to call to Ianto, before she sputtered with surprise.
"Oh my god, Ianto!" yelled Tosh. "You look great!"
"Oi, what's all this commotion? I'm trying to play my game!" yelled Owen as he emerged from the autopsy bay. "Holy shit Tea-boy!"
"Quiet down," said Ianto sternly. "I'm trying to go unnoticed from him, because I look like this," he pointed to his outfit.
"I don't see anything wrong with that," said Gwen.
"How about this," whispered yelled Ianto, as he took off his hat. He pointed to his hair while they all gasped to his dyed hair.
"It's, its--!" yelled Gwen but was cut off by Ianto.
"Yes I get the point, Gwen," said Ianto.
"What-Why?" asked the Welshwoman.
"I just woke up today, to find my hair dyed! I think someone did it to me because I found my window open. I have absolutely no idea who it was," drifted off Ianto.
"Wouldn't you have known that someone dyed your head?" Owen asked.
"Yes, but I guess I was out cold. I think that was the first time since 11th grade I've gone to bed a 9 PM,"
"Jack is eventually going to find out, right?" asked Tosh.
"Yes, but I put him on a 'no sex or coffee until your paperwork up to date'. It is going to take about another three hours or so. I know because I saw his pile last night, while we were…discussing," said Ianto trying to keep his personal life on the down low for the moment. Owen snorted at the comment.
"Whatever, I'm heading back to the autopsy bay; a mean game is calling my name. How long is coffee?" asked the medic.
"Uh, just put it on the brew, so about 20 minutes. I'm going in the archives, be back soon with your coffee," said Ianto while putting his hat back on. 20 minutes passed and Ianto poured their brews in their favorite cup to their specifications. Tosh was first, then Gwen, then lastly Owen. Engrossed in his game, Ianto set down his coffee on his desk. He noticed a generic shopping bag right beside the medic's paper disposal.
"Owen, where did you get your shirt, just wondering," he said trying to make conversation. So far Ianto just wanted to relax and let this whole fiasco blow over.
"You mean my Blue Gillespie shirt?" responded Owen. Ianto drew a blank.
"I've never heard of them," Ianto shrugged his shoulders.
"You've never heard…You have never heard of them? Wow, you really need to get out more," laughed Owen. His foot moved over and accidently kicked the bag, revealing something that he hoped the young man did not see. Ianto, being the gentleman that he is, helped to clean up and picked up the small opened box.
"You. God. Damned. Bastard," angrily yelled Ianto. Owen ran out of the autopsy bay, and up to Jack's office, not knocking.
"Oh, hi Owen, nice of you to knock," greeted Jack, sarcastically as Owen hid behind Jack's chair. Jack became very bewildered. He heard Tosh trying to calm down the archivist as all his rage poured out. "What's going on?" asked Jack. Owen whispered into his ear, and Jack erupted into laughter. Ianto opened the door, hat discarded.
"Hi," Jack couldn't hide his laughter, "pumpkin," more laughter came out of his mouth.
"Tell Owen that he is on fucking decaf for six fucking months. If I have to suffer until my hair grows out for six months, then he'll suffer of caffeine withdrawal for the same amount of time," gritted Ianto through his teeth.
"Mmmm, six months with Ianto's hair, Neon Orange. My favorite color," Jack paused, "Thank you," he said before the infamous grin splashed across his face.
Owen just groaned.
Reviews are most gladly welcome