"Oh God, I hate flying."
"Why did I have to sit by this stinky ass fatty?"
"I just want to run my hand up the skirt of that flight attendant."
I took a deep breath to clear my mind. If I concentrate hard enough, they'll all just go away. I closed my eyes and laid my head back on the window. Slowly they started to fade and once again I was alone in silence. Most people hate silence. I adore it.
I opened my eyes and looked out at the clouds just below the wing of the charter plane I was flying in. I was on my way to live with my Dad Charlie. It was the day before my junior year of high school was to begin and I dreaded change. At least back in Arizona I had years of practice with tuning people out. Every time someone new arrived I had to learn how to tune them out as well. Now an entire new town has to be made silent. I shudder at the thought…literally.
"Please buckle your seat belts; we'll be making touch down at Quillayute Airport in about ten minutes. Thank you."
I closed my eyes again as their voices began immersing back into my mind.
"Please don't crash; please don't crash."
"Finally some fresh air…ugh hasn't he ever heard of deodorant?"
"Shit, where's my pen? I need to give her my number."
I found the switch again and turned it off. Breathing deeply, they began to fade. I could see the green trees below me. Everything below me was green, aside from the ocean that I could see just at the horizon. From here it looked like a beautiful deep blue.
Slowly we made our final descend and with a rocky touch down, we taxied our way to the ridiculously small airport. The flight attendant that some guy was hounding over opened the door and pulled a lever allowing the stairs to descend to the ground. I opened my backpack and replaced the book I started reading this morning while on my flight from Phoenix to Seattle, and finished it from Seattle to Forks.
I went to step out into the aisle and was rudely pushed by some guy who was in a hurry to leave; probably the one afraid of flying. I guess I could let it pass this time.
"Enjoy your stay in Forks, Washington," the flight attendant said as the four of us left the plane. I smiled sheepishly at her. "Just fucking leave; I want to go get drunk. Oh joy another fucking number from another fucking dick." She smiled at the man in front of me; I was the last to leave. Not unusual really, I'd rather stand in the back away from people's faces. It's easier to block them out that way.
I turned on my cell phone and found I had one missed call from Charlie. I dialed the voice mail and listened to his message. "Bells, I'm waiting outside in the cruiser, you can't miss me. See you in a minute. I just saw your plane land. Okay bye." I pushed delete and hung up the phone. I walked to baggage claim and found my two suitcases. I didn't bring much with me, considering I really didn't have anything to bring. Most of my Arizona clothes would be pointless in Forks.
Forks Washington, I breathed in the clean fresh air as I walked outside the doors and saw Charlie walking toward me.
"Here, let me help you with that." Charlie grabbed one of the bags.
"Thanks." I said. "Good to be here finally." I swayed back and forth on my feet. Charlie and I really didn't know each other too well. I loved my Dad of course, but I was never the little girl who relied on her parents for everything. Renee, my Mom, always said I had an old spirit; what ever that meant. I don't pretend to understand Renee; she's always been somewhat flakey.
"Okay so that's it?" he asked looking around. I nodded and opened the passenger side door and buckled my seat belt.
"Man it's good to have her here. I've missed her a lot. I wonder if she'll like the truck. It's old but sturdy. If not I guess I can figure out how to get her something more…hip."
"So how was your flight?" Charlie never really looked at me. I'm glad too; he would have noticed a huge shit-eating grin on my face. I took some deep breaths again to find the switch.
"Uneventful," I answered "but, that's always a good thing when you're flying right?"
I watched as the tall Spruce trees touched the tip of the grey clouded sky. Typically by nature I like clouds. They hide the sun. This is good because I swear that I must be half albino. During the summers in Arizona I couldn't spend more than fifteen minutes outside at a time or I'd burn and walk around like a Maryland steamed crab. Renee never understood why I enjoyed going to Charlie's during the summers. She'd always say I need more sun, or my personal favorite, "You'll get rickets."
As we pulled up to Charlie's modest home, rain drops started to fall from the sky. Some might take this as an omen, me, I haven't seen rain – real rain, in almost a year. If I wasn't so introverted I would have played in mud puddles or tried to catch the rain on my tongue. Instead, I acted normal and helped Charlie with my suit cases and hurried to the old wooden porch. Charlie never locked his door so I walked right in. His theory was, why would someone break into the chief of police's house? I guess he had a point. In Phoenix that was unheard of.
I strained as I pulled my suit case up the stairs to my bedroom. It was exactly how I left it last time I was here. The yellow walls still had the crack in the corner, although now it was beginning to grow. My double bed was covered in a simple white sheet set, with an old blue comforter folded on top. The old; I do mean old, computer sat dusty on the desk against the wall. Yep it was home.
"I cleaned out some shelves in the bathroom for you," he stated as he lingered at the door after placing my larger suit case on the bed.
So there are some things I'll miss about living with Renee, one being my own bathroom. But for now that's the only one I can think of. It came as a slight shock when I asked Charlie if I could live with him. He didn't have a problem with it; he was just curious as to why I would want to live with him. Renee freaked out. Full blown toddler temper tantrum. I didn't lie to her per se about why I wanted to leave, but I did edit it…a lot. But it was for her own good and for mine as well.
"Thanks again. Ya know for letting me stay here." I began to unzip the larger bag.
"Bells, do you want to tell me now, why it is you wanted to come here so much?" he quizzed me from the door. I didn't want to talk about it to him really. Or anyone for that matter.
"I just got tired of taking care of Renee all the time." I'd given him the same reason I'd given Renee. "Besides, I'm seventeen and I've never lived with you." I didn't dare look at his face.
"Umm, I didn't know she ever wanted to. Renee always said she would hate living up here. Fucking bitch, hope she rots in hell."
"I'm going to finish up here and put some stuff away. Are you working tonight?" Breath, find it…there…switch...and silence.
"Nope, took off!" he sounded so proud. Charlie never took off work. "I thought we could go down to the diner for dinner, if you're not too tired," he raised his eyebrow at me. I could either stay inside with silence now that I have found Charlie's switch, or I could venture to the realm of chatter, noise, and cigarette smoke. I knew how much Charlie wanted to show me off. Show the town folks of Forks I was living with him now. I really couldn't stand to hurt his feelings so chatter, noise and cigarette smoke here I come.
"Sounds good," I smiled weakly at him, he nodded and walked out the door. I put the few pairs of jeans I did have into the old dresser that I've had since I can remember. Inside were jeans from last years visit. I put the new ones in with them, I figured I hadn't changed all that much in the past year, they probably still fit. I hung up a few sweaters and found Charlie had purchased a large brown jacket for me. I smiled to myself and tried it on. All and all it fit pretty well. Slightly big, but I really don't care. I put the now empty suit cases in the back of the closet and closed the door. I sat down in my bed and laid my head on the pillow. I looked up at the spackled ceiling, for the first time, I started to think about why I left and if it was right. I knew in my heart it was, but would Renee ever see that? Probably not.
In one of my bags I had packed some of my favorite books. Most of the classic stories, some more modern fiction, I placed the one I wanted to start reading now on top of the nightstand by my bed. I grabbed it and rolled over on my stomach and opened the worn pages. The reason I loved classic stories so much, is that back then, people knew how to write, how to put feelings on the page; it took blood, sweat and tears and true knowledge to write a book. Now authors have a keyboard and spell check.
Just as I was three chapters in, I heard a roaring sound from outside of the house. I bent the corners of the page and shut the book then shuffled my way downstairs. I briefly saw Charlie close the door behind me. I opened the door to see Charlie greeting his friend Billy Black. I knew Billy well. During the summers he'd always come over with fried fish to watch some sports game on T.V. Sadly he was in an accident a few years ago that left him in a wheelchair. He didn't seem to mind too much, he liked the good parking spots.
"Hey Billy," I waved from the porch as Billy's son helped him into his chair. I didn't recognize Jacob at first. He had grown taller and cut his hair. Once he saw me, though, his wide bright smile was so familiar. "Hey Jacob," I added as I looked down at my feet.
"Wow she's so beautiful. I wonder…no way. I hope she likes the truck."
"It's good to have Bella around, now maybe she can talk Charlie into buying a big screen T.V."
I closed my eyes and concentrated on their voices. Slowly I found it and they began to fade. It wasn't like with Charlie. Over the years I have found Charlie's frequency switch. Kinda like pushing the mute button. With others I don't know well, it's more like turning the volume down. Problem is I have no control on when the volume goes back up. But if I spent enough time with them, I would learn their switch too.
"So do you like it?" Charlie was standing at the bottom of the steps, helping Jacob bring Billy on the porch. The rain was still falling softly to the ground. I already guessed that was the truck Charlie was thinking about earlier. But he didn't know, so I wasn't going to ever mention it.
"Like what?" I pretended.
"The truck," he stated the obvious. "I bought it for you." He smiled showing his teeth under his heavy mustache.
"You did?" I acted surprised and as he was up on the final step I gave him a hug. "I love it; thank you." I think my affectionate display took us both back. We never had that bond really. Sure, hugs when I was leaving for the rest of the winter, but usually that was about it. He knew I loved him, and I knew he loved me, so we didn't have the need to share it or display it often.
"Yeah? Really?" he looked a bit confused as I pulled away from our awkward embrace.
"Yeah, it's sturdy." Not to mention the fact that I'd take anything if it meant not having to ride around in the police cruiser. I hate attention and that grabs attention.
"I rebuilt the engine for you," Jacob spoke up from behind me. He was shy like me. His head remained on his worn shoes. I smiled weakly at him. "Thanks," I said to him, my voice cracking a little bit.
We all walked inside the house and I went and grabbed Charlie and Billy a beer from the fridge. I offered a soda to Jacob but he declined.
"I should talk to her. She probably thinks I'm a loser. She should smile more, her smile is so beautiful."
This is the part I hated. Knowing people's more personal thoughts. So often it's creepy. I feel like some sort of perverted peeping tom. As a child I once spoke with to Renee about the voices in my head, she quickly took me a doctor who said I had schizophrenia and prescribed medication that made me violently sick. That was when I was ten. When I was thirteen, I went to her again; a different doctor told her I had multiple personality disorder and again the medication made me sick. Since then I haven't spoken of it to either Renee or Charlie. Only once has Charlie asked me about it. I lied and told him I didn't hear things anymore. That is when I began to learn to control it to an extent. Some people's frequency is too strong and they barge in without even knocking.
I looked at my watch and it was 5:30pm. "Umm…Dad, did you still want to go to dinner?" I asked during a commercial. He in turn looked down at his watch and stood up.
"You guys want to come?" Charlie asked Billy and Jacob. I could see Jacob's face light up slightly.
"Na, but can you guys drop us off back on the reservation?" Billy looked over his shoulder at Charlie.
"Sure thing," Charlie answered "Bella, why don't you take Jacob in the truck, he can give you a quick driving lesson, and I'll follow you with Billy in the cruiser." I felt my face flush and Jacob stood up to help his Dad.
"Sounds good, there are a few tricks to the old beast," Jacob smiled at me. Without my will, I somewhat smiled back.
Inside the faded red truck I struggled to keep Jacob silent. The inside smelled like mold and there was a faint smell of tobacco, but not cigarettes, more like pipe or cigar.
"You have to make sure the clutch is all the way to the floor before it will turn over. And if it doesn't start on the first try, pump the clutch a few times, it usually works." Jacob seemed in his environment. More comfortable. I pushed the clutch all the way down and my leg was almost too short; the engine started on the first turn. The sound was almost deafening. I cringed slightly - so much for inconspicuous.
"Is there a way to make it quieter?" I forced a smile.
"No not really," he chuckled softly then looked back down at his lap.
The gears grind a little bit as I pulled out of the driveway. I managed to make it all the way to Jacob's house without him invading my mind. Plus, the truck was still in one piece. I've never driven a stick shift before, but Jacob assured me that I would get the hang of it in no time. The drive back to the diner was, at least for me, a lot more comfortable.
Windows and walls blocked out other people in more ways than one. So I enjoyed time alone in my room or alone in a vehicle or alone period. Back in Arizona I didn't make friends. I had none. But if I was to be honest, I didn't mind that either. There was nothing worse than knowing what someone really thought about you inside their minds. People are cruel by nature, but very few people truly speak their mind, and that's probably a good thing.
I inhaled a cleansing breath to begin the relaxation process to help me turn the volume down. I pushed on the heavy truck door and exited the sanctuary of the old beast. The parking lot of the diner was full, and so was the diner. Charlie walked over to me and patted the hood of the truck.
"So whatcha think?" he asked smiling. I took notice that his crows feet are getting more pronounced than last year, so was the gray hair that tainted the temple area of his lush brown hair.
"I think it's loud," I answered honesty. His face frowned a bit, "but I really love it," I added so I wouldn't hurt his feelings.
"Good, come on lets get some food, I'm starving," he motioned for me to walk ahead of him. As we approached the door, I prepared myself for the assault. Charlie opened the door for me and bam…it was so loud and full that I couldn't make out one particular thought. They were all mumbled together, this always gave me an instant headache. I closed my eyes briefly and ran my fingers though my hair, grabbed some and gripped it tightly.
"Bells, you alright?" Charlie asked. I nodded yes, and followed him to a booth that was thankfully in the corner away from other people, kind of.
Once we sat down, I ordered water and began my process. I pretended to be looking at the menu as I looked down with closed eyes. Slowly they dulled to a low murmur. And finally it was quiet. Before, it took minutes for me to do that, now it was down to forty seconds. I truly hated this curse. It plagued my existence; it ruined any chance I had at a normal life. I couldn't have friends, I couldn't have boyfriends, and I couldn't even eat dinner with my Dad without it interrupting.
I ordered a salad and Charlie ordered a burger that must have taken an entire cow to make, sided with French fries and a glass of Coke. I vowed to myself right then that Charlie's eating habits were about to a take hit in the gut. No pun intended. We didn't talk during dinner. I was thankful, mostly because I really didn't have anything to say. He paid the bill and I followed him back to the house.
As I was driving the quick drive back, I allowed myself to think about why I truly left. It wasn't anything traumatic, but it was inevitable I suppose. I learned Renee's switch first. Obviously living with her was extremely frustrating. When caught off guard I would hear how sad she was to be alone, how she worried that I spent too much time alone, she worried a lot. Then she met her new husband Phil. I liked Phil at first, he was genuine to Renee and his feelings were pure. But one night he and Renee went out, they came back drunk, and it was shortly after he'd moved in so I didn't know his frequency, he didn't have a switch. I was still awake watching a movie, and his thoughts toward me were foul and disgusting. "Look at her sitting there, I bet that is one tight ass pussy, if she wasn't Renee's daughter…" I ran out of the room and locked myself inside my bedroom. The next day I called Charlie.
I stopped the thought process and turned the loud truck off as fast as humanly possible. Rain began to fall harder on the windshield. Charlie parked behind me and it took me by surprise when he opened the truck door and held an umbrella for me. We ran to the porch and I noticed how my feet were soaked. Another mental note was to get water proof shoes. Once inside I went to the kitchen to take inventory of what Charlie had. He didn't have much. Just the typical stuff: milk, eggs, bread…etc. So I found a pen and paper and wrote down the dinner list for the next week and added lunch meat for Charlie along with some healthy snacks he could take to work.
"Hey, I made a grocery list and I wanted to do the shopping tomorrow after school…"
"My card is in my wallet," he answered without looking up from the T.V.
"Thanks, I'm off to bed, see you in the morning." I dragged myself up the stairs and into my room. I pulled out some pajama pants and a tank top and padded off to the bathroom.
I turned the water on hot and allowed steam to fill the tiny bathroom. I entered flinching a little at the heat, than relaxed as it eased the muscles in my back. I washed my hair and shaved my legs, and as I was washing my body, the familiar twinge in my stomach appeared as the softness of my hands brushed my breast. That twinge would never be eased. At least not by a man. I rinsed the soap off my body and the conditioner out of my hair and exited the shower. After wrapping my long brown hair in a towel I dried my body then put on my warm welcoming pajamas.
I walked back to my room and laid out the blue comforter. I turned on my night lamp and snuggled underneath the sheets. I picked up my book and opened it to the folded page. If I couldn't be in a normal relationship, then I'd live through Scarlet O'Hara.
If only I didn't hear what people really thought of me. In Phoenix the girls were catty and rude. I didn't even pretend to like them, or pretend I wanted anything to do with them. Even the girls that were outcasts like me thought I was weird, strange, odd…anything along those lines. Only because before I understood what was going on, I would answer people's questions, even if they didn't speak them out loud. Boys liked to pick on me, by giving me vulgar gestures or knocking the books out of my hands. Nobody ever helped me.
I snapped myself out of memory lane and slammed my book back down on the night stand. I angrily turned the lamp off and sank lower in my bed.
"Fuck you mind reading curse and the black horse you rode in on!"
I had my head hanging out the window of my bedroom. The cool morning air blew the smoke from my cigarette away from the window, thankfully. The last thing I need at 7:00 am is pappy busting in here giving me the lecture on how smoking is bad for your health, you're gonna get lung cancer, blah fucking blah. There was no way I was dragging my happy ass out of bed and to the dreadful first day of school with out a good nicotine buzz. I flicked the cigarette out the window then closed it. I walked over to my nightstand, grabbed the bottle of pills and popped three in my mouth. Nicotine and Valium, the breakfast of champions.
I went to the shower, jacked off, brushed my teeth, and got dressed ready for the not so lovely first day of my junior year. Christ two more years of this, I inwardly rolled my eyes. I had a light stubble on my face, but who cares. I couldn't care less really about how people saw me. It's not like I didn't know exactly what they thought already. People in this town suck big ass monkey balls. And I've only lived here for two months.
My pappy Carlisle is a retired surgeon. Why he couldn't retire in Florida like the rest of the rich population I have no clue. Something about not being materialistic or some shit like that. Whatever, the man was crazier than me. HA and that's saying something. My mother, Esme on the other hand was sweet, loving, smart, kind, the polar opposite of Carlisle. It's not that Carlisle is a prick or neglectful, or anything like that, he's just Carlisle. It's kinda like lima beans…nothing wrong with them per se but they're fucking gross.
Even the house that pappy bought is modest compared to the one we had in New York. Then again I suppose they did have houses like that here. Esme fell in love with this old two story Victorian house and had to have it. They are still renovating it. Why buy an old house for its "character" when you're just going to destroy it? That's a good way of looking at our relationship; they keep trying to change something in me that neither they nor I have any control over. So instead, I shut down emotionally. I stopped being the outgoing, funny, caring Edward and now I'm just the fuck you go away Edward. It was easier this way.
I lazily walked down the stairs into the make shift kitchen and grabbed a bowl of cereal.
"Fuck I'm late. Wonder if Edward is out of bed."
"In here," I answered Carlisle's question. I heard his foot steps quicken as he entered the kitchen.
"Running late," I raised and eyebrow at him as I shoved a spoon full of cereal in my mouth causing a little bit of milk to run out the corner of my mouth. Sneaky white shit.
"Yeah, are you ready to go? I can drop you off on my way to the hospital." Carlisle tossed his keys from hand to hand.
"Why did you retire if all you're doing is working?" I smirked at him
"Because I can't stand to be here with your mother another second and if I do I might drown her and bury her body out back in the woods."
"Edward, I like doing my job. Teaching is a great opportunity for me." He covered his true feelings.
"If you'd just give me my keys back, I can drive myself to school." I rinsed my bowl out and placed it in the new dishwasher.
"If you'd stop being a prick to your mother and me maybe I will," he noted. He turned and walked to the front door. I gave him the finger behind his back and picked up my bag and walked after him.
Fuck I missed my car. But pappy's was a pretty tight blacked out Mercedes. Still arriving at the new shithole school in style; it's early so whatever.
"Did you take your medication this morning?" he asked not so nonchalantly.
"Always do," I answered with a hint of resentment. That fucker didn't need to know that I loathed that shit. It didn't help any so why take it. Nothing helped.
"Wonder if that cute intern is on duty today. Esme used to have an ass like hers. Fuck I hope Edward doesn't act out here."
I gripped the black leather seats so tight I thought I would rip them. I closed my eyes and counted backwards from ten.
Ten, nine, eight…
"We should order out tonight, the stove won't be here until tomorrow."
Seven, six, five…
"Crap did I remember my phone?"
Four, three, two, one.
I took a deep breath and exhaled loudly. What I wouldn't give for a moment's silences around him. We pulled up to the school and I opened the door before he was at a complete stop. "I'll pick you up around three, okay?" he yelled before I slammed the door on him. I'm a prick yes, but he's the king of assholes.
As expected the school was still empty aside from teachers busying themselves around. I walked into the office and found the guidance counselors' office. I've been forced to check in with him every morning and have a "talk" every Monday. Basically he's my pseudo therapist. As if he could help.
I knocked on his door lightly and I heard him say come in. I ran my fingers through my hair and walked into the latest version of hell.
"Edward Cullen?" The man looked at his folder.
"Yep," I nodded my head.
"Umm trauma, schizophrenia, he's taking Haldol…"
I rolled my eyes. I hated this shit. I want my normal quiet mind back. What ever happen to me in that fucking accident screwed me up big time. I should have never gotten in the car, but I was drunk and not thinking right. Now I have this fucked up head and my best friend from New York is dead…happy seventeenth fucking birthday Edward.
"So are you nervous about today? Your father tells me you've been having a hard time adjusting to Forks." He rapped his pen on the table causing it to make an annoying clicking sound. I put my head in my hands and pinched the bridge of my nose.
"It's a major change, yes." Lets see New York City; alive, dangerous, fun, night clubs, hookers, homeless, subway and Forks, old people, outdoor store, deer, and a lot of fucking trees…yeah slight change. Did this guy get his degree out of a cereal box?
"Well here is your schedule and it's a small school so you shouldn't have a hard time navigating the map," he handed me the papers and I quickly left his office. Fucking cracker jack doctor.
"Wow, he surely is good looking for a student. That must be the new doctor's son. Wonder if the good doc's married?"
I ran out of the office and out the front doors. I needed some fresh air. I pushed past a few students walking in, but didn't care. I just looked down and walked quickly to the side of the building. I ran my fingers through my hair over and over again. A nervous habit I've always had. I hated it more now because every time I did I felt the scar on the back of my head. A constant reminder of the worst day of my life. I paced back and forth and finally took the smokes out of my pocket and lit one up. Ah heavenly nicotine. I inhaled the toxins again.
"Stupid ass. Smoke, must go smoke."
I feel you man I mentally sympathized with who ever I heard. Just then he turned the corner, ran right into me and he knocked the cigarette out of my hand.
"Oh shit man sorry, I didn't know anyone was here." He reached in his pocket and pulled out some smokes handing me one.
"It's cool," I took the cigarette and lit it up, handing him my lighter.
"New kid huh?" he asked blowing the smoke away from me.
"Poor mother fucker, I'd hate to be him. I'd kill to get the fuck out of here."
"Yeah," I smirked a little at his comment. I felt the same way.
"I'm Jasper by the way," he took another drag.
"Edward," I answered with a nod and inhaling.
"Alright put that shit out, teacher arrival in thirty seconds," he said as he stepped on the butt, and leaving it there. I did the same and followed him around the corner. I'd be damned he's good; there she was marching toward us.
"You got lucky this time Whitlock, but the school year is just beginning."
Jasper and I are going to get along just fine. As long as he doesn't turn out to be some homo perv that wears chick's undies.
I found my first class no problem. I tried hard to dull the chaos inside my head to no prevail. One chick's voice stood out more, not a good thing; it was squeaky and annoying as fuck.
"Christ oh mighty! After class I have to talk to him. I mean if Mike isn't going to pay attention to me this year, I have to move on right? He's so gorgeous. Look at that hair. And those ripped jeans and rugged shirt."
I ran my fingers through my hair again and closed my eyes. Finally the Valium is starting to kick in so at least the voices are starting to blur. Once the bell rang I gathered my note pad and book and headed for my locker. I got half way out the door when I heard the shrill voice call my name.
"You're Edward right?" she asked bouncing up on her tippy toes. Her curly hair bounced like Shirley Temple. "Look at that jaw…umm how I'd love to…"
"Yeah," I blurted out to interrupt her from mentally fucking me.
She smiled widely at me and stuck her hand out "Jessica Stanley."
I shook her hand and turned and walked away. I opened my locker and shoved my book inside and headed off to find the closest bathroom. As I was walking in Jasper was walking out.
"Hey, man, not in there, Mr. Banner's a dick and waits there after every period," he pointed to the double doors that led to the cafeteria. We walked though and then walked out side to the side of the building we were earlier this morning. I leaned up against the wall and pulled out my smokes offering him one. We lit up and didn't say a fucking word. All though his thoughts were all about some chick he seemed obsessed with. We heard the bell ring and we flicked our cigarettes and I ran to my next class.
The day dragged on extremely slow; people were talking or thinking about the new kid; but they were also talking about not just me, but another new chick. I wouldn't know her if I saw her so fuck it. I was now headed off to fourth period Biology. Basically the marking of half way through this dull ass school day. I was the first one to walk in; the teacher wasn't even here yet. I took the moment to enjoy the silence inside my head. I hadn't had a moment's peace all day. Inside the classrooms I could hear every mother fucker there. In the hallways if they were in the same hall I could hear them, and outside if they were with in four feet of me, I could hear them. It seems to be easier outside. Like the fresh air helps cloud my mind. Yeah, I'm backwards as fuck I know. I sat in the back at one of the lab tables and put my head down, to soak in the peacefulness, that didn't last very fucking long.
"Thank God only one person. This day blows. 11:00 great almost done. I should have brought aspirin with me, my head is throbbing. Where do I sit? I'll just sit in the back away from everyone else, just like normal."
I looked up to see a girl looking down at her feet. A cover of brown hair formed a shield blocking her face from me. She held her books to her chest, hugging them as if they were precious gifts. I rolled my eyes and put my head back down. She began to mentally sing a song. I peeked at her, she had brushed her hair over her shoulder and she had her eyes closed and her head still looking down. She smiled weakly as she continued to sing; she sounded pretty good. I saw her face twist in pain as a group of kids came walking into the classroom. Instantly the mumbles started. Typical teenage crap really; they always thought the same shit; money, sex, cars, and more sex. Rarely did I hear anything of intelligence. Home girl in the back was the first I heard anything other than the norm.
"Awesome, I have another class with Edward. I hope I get partnered with him. God he's so sexy."
Great that girl has another class with me. If I do get partnered with her, I swear I'll blow my fucking brains out. I rested my head back down in my hands and pinched the bridge of my nose to try and soothe the on and off again headache. Out of habit I ran my fingers through my hair tugging at it a little. I attempted to count backwards but was interrupted.
"Yummy, I'll run my fingers through your hair for you sexy."
I looked up and saw that Jessica chick eye fucking me from a few seats in front of me. More students came in, including Jasper. He trailed behind some short chick who was indeed smoking hot. He looked up and saw me and started walking to the back. As the little pixie chick sat down he ogled her ass. So did I so fuck it.
"Fuck she's beautiful. I bet her lips would be so soft and warm around Pedro. She's way out of my league though, she always has been."
Jasper slid into the seat next to me and cracked half a smile and leaned back in his seat; crossing his arm behind his head. He nudged my arm and I sat up from my lazy position. The girl across the aisle from us put her hair curtain back down.
"Who's that?" I looked over and the brunette.
"She's the new chick. Isabella Swan. Chief Swan's daughter," he looked over at her.
"She's pretty cute in a girl next door way, but I haven't seen her talk to a single person today. I had first and second period with her, and now this one, and she just sits in the back with her hair around her face and always looking down." He shrugged his shoulders. And as if she heard him she quickly glanced over toward us. I quickly looked away in fear she caught me staring at her.
Soon the class was full and my head was about to explode. The bell rang and then our teacher came walking in. Nice of the fucker to finally show up.
"Welcome students," he walked over to his desk and picked up a piece of paper, then walked over to the board and wrote his name large enough for every one to see. "My name is Mr. Banner, and this is Biology 105 and if you think you are in the wrong class let me know. Most likely you're not because this is the only Biology lab in this school." He finished his rant and turned to face the class. "I have assigned seating for everyone so if you'd all stand up on the outside of the lab tables we'll get started." Everyone stood up groaning. Almost ever person in the class said the same thing, "fuck." All accept the soft shy voice of one girl,
"Please let my partner not think I'm a freak"
I stood next to Jasper not really paying attention as he went through a few names. Thankfully Jessica got partnered with some guy who she seemed to loath. God loves me after all. I heard Jasper's name be called.
"Come on Alice please Alice..."
"Alice Brandon." the black little fairy chick skipped her way over to the lab table and sat beside Jasper. I think he got a hard on as soon as her name was called.
"Fuck yeah! High five mother fucker!"
I indeed gave Jasper a mental high five.
"Yes! I bet he still wears the same cologne. One day I'll get up the nerve to talk to him. He's so fuckable."
I laughed at myself. If only they knew. Some other people were called and some more profanities were thought. I watched new girl run her hand through her hair and clinch her eye tight. There was only four left to be called, I was either going to be partnered with some mammoth jock or some preppy fucktard or the mysterious brunette who had only lifted her head once to see who was left. Her face fell with she was it was just three guys.
"Isabella Swan and Edward Cullen take a seat at the table on your left and that leaves Emmett and Mike at the table on the right. Okay now that that is finished I'll pass out your text books and well go over the course syllabus".
Isabella sat right back down in the seat she had already been sitting in. I walked over and sat down beside her. She closed her eyes again and a few seconds later looked up with a relieved look on her face. She slightly smiled as she tucked her hair behind her ear.
"Ah silence is golden. Still want some aspirin though. Today's been harder then I thought. Stupid high altitude frequencies. I think I'll make Charlie an Italian dish tonight."
Frequencies? No wonder people thought she was a freak. She suddenly looked up at me. Her brown eyes pierced though me. Her mouth opened a bit like she was going to speak then didn't. She pulled her hair around her shoulder to make her curtain again.
"Sing Bella just sing...think of a song…something relaxing…"
She started to hum some tune in her head. Jasper was right, she was pretty. But far more than a girl next door way. I guess I should at least introduce myself. Turn on some Cullen charm. Girls back in New York loved the shit. But that was before that accident, and before this fucked up shit in my head.
"You're new too, huh," I asked her with a half grin. She looked over at me but never really looked at my face. It was like she avoided all eye contact.
"Yep," she answered in a quiet shy, tone. Her voice sounded just like her thoughts. Musical.
"Why is he talking to me? He's the first person all day to even say one word to me. Damn it I shouldn't have looked at him. And musical, I don't sound musical. Wait…"
I stared at her with wide eyes and she lifted her head to look straight at me, dead in the eyes. There is no fucking way she heard me. It's fucked up enough that one person in this shithole town can hear thoughts, but two? That's more fucked up then seeing your grandparents fuck.
"I caught my Mom once having sex her new husband. I can't image anything older than them having sex."
Fuck a dick! I looked at her and smiled, she fucking heard me. Her face lit up. She smiled and ran her fingers through her hair tugging at it a little bit…just like me.