Get Me To You
So someone finally tapped Bella. I got to say, it is about damn time. Because that girl has been flaunting that shit since she got here. She's been sitting on laps and kissing cheeks and necks and hands and I sure as fuck was certain that it was all for Eddie. But damn, when I saw the way Jasper's hand curved around her ass, just for a second there, I knew that my boy had tapped that shit, and it was still going strong.
I had to ask him about it, you know. It's not like Rose is going to let me get within an inch of that shit, no matter how cool she is with my flirting and the things I sometimes do with my fingers. She made it crystal fucking clear the first time she saw Bella on my lap that with that girl? There was no fun allowed. Weva. I don't understand her, I don't even try.
But Jasper. Day-um. Of course I have to know more, so I get him one day before school and we're hanging in the parking lot and here comes Eddie and Miss Thang comes stepping out of the passenger seat and I look at him and I had to say you and Swan and he looks at me all cool. And I say well, c'mon man, you know I gotta know about that shit and motherbitch if he didn't look at me like he was going to fucking tear out my throat for talking about her like a lay.
Yeah, then I got it. He wasn't hittin' that shit hard, he was hittin' that shit soft. Soft like sweet. Then I saw the way she looked up at Jasper, coming out of Cullen's car and a flash of guilt across her face. She ran her finger up his arm as she passed him and for one second he looked like he was going to be sick in her wake. Then he was back to being Jasper, cool and mellow as fuck but I saw that one second and you know what? Things are officially fucked the shit up.
Because you add that one second with the fact that Bella's popping out of Edward's car two or three times a week and that guilty look because shit, we all know she's in love with Cullen and the fact that Cullen can't fucking stay away from the girl and he can't keep his dick out of every other piece that looks good to him and then multiply that with the fact that Whitlock's been in love with Alice since the second he laid eyes on her in the seventh grade and shit. Rose may be a fucking ice queen and an uptight controlling bitch who lets underclassmen feel her up because daddy doesn't love her enough but you know, I know exactly where I stand with that girl. I know that we'll get the fuck out of Forks and fuck who knows how many random people in college but at the end of it she's going to wear my ring on her finger and she's going to have my fucking kids because we both just know that's how it's going to be.
Yeah, I might have my shit wired but those four? Fucked. Up.
# # #
So sweet little Isabella is fucking our Jasper, hmm? This ought to be interesting.
# # #
You ever been to the Grand Canyon? You get out of your car and you walk over near the edge and you've got all the space in the world, you know? Like you couldn't possibly fall off because there's just so much space. It's so beautiful and you're laughing with your friends and you're talking and you're having a good time and the next thing you know you're right on the fucking edge, about to fall off into that huge fucking hole in the ground. And it's so goddamned deep that you know that if you fall, you'll never stop falling. And you've got to decide. Are you coming in from the edge? Or are you gonna tip over and fall? And it's hard, you know? When you've got that little candymouth waiting for you at the bottom. And you know if you fall it'll be like flying. But it's scary, and so you waver. And try not to think of candymouth ,and doe eyes. Try not to want, for just one time, her screaming it out for you.
Fucking hell, man.
# # #
It finally got to the point where I had to say no. I had to tell him he couldn't come over anymore. He can't come to my window two or three nights a week, or even one or two nights a month. He can't come and whisper to me and let me smell him when he pulls me in to his chest and puts his hand over my head and twists his fingers into my hair. He can't come and give me parts and not all because I can't take just parts anymore. Not when Japser can't look me in the eye the morning after and yeah, he gets straight by lunch but I can't take him dodging me one more morning. I can't take him calling me Bella like that's my name and it is my name but it's not his name for me, and that's what I've got to have. Even if I'm awful, even if I'm the worst person in the world for what I want, I know that Jasper deserves better and I'm going to try to give it to him. I'm going to try to deserve every sweet thing about that man because he deserves so much better than me.
Edward finally figured it out though. Because nothing changed between us for a long time. After…after that one day and one night, he acted like nothing happened. He didn't even ask where I was the day before, when I stayed home and Jasper…stayed with me. But it was right after Rosalie's last big party when he came to my window and he was drunk. So drunk. He was slurring and I don't even know how he managed to get up the tree because he stumbled over the window frame and fell and hit his head against my desk and I had to yell to Charlie that I was fine, fine, fine.
I wasn't though. Because he comes in all drunk and slurry and reeking and he tries to kiss me but I couldn't. I can't. And then he just…dissolved. Him on his knees and his arms around my waist and he's fucking crying and saying Isabella, Isabella, like fucking Cibola again. And shit, I don't want him crying. It was so fucking wrong. He is Edward fucking Cullen. There should not be tears. Not ever.
I pulled him up into the bed and I pulled off his shoes and I tried to – god, I am the worst person I know – I tried to make those same sounds that Jasper makes that calm me down and it worked because he stopped and then he put his hand on my tit and I had to pull away again and he gave me this look. This broken look and he didn't say a word he just looked. So I said, why are you here, Edward? And he says something about friends and I said I can't be that kind of friend for you. I can't give you everything and only get pieces back. And he says pieces are all he has to give and I said that's bullshit, Edward, because I know there's more, I've seen it and you're just a chickenshit and he says yeah, he knows but it's the best he can do and I – I don't even know where it came from, I think it came from that space that I made for Jasper – but I said well that's not good enough.
He slept it off and I sat in the rocking chair all night long shaking and when I got out of the shower in the morning he was gone and when he asked to come over again the next night I told him no. He must have come anyway because the next day when I got out of Jasper's car and we started walking in I say hi to Edward and he high-fives Jasper a hello but he just looks at me like I've betrayed him. Jasper pretended not to notice that, or the shadows like bruises under my eyes the day before, but I know he did because after school he brought me back to his room and we curled on the bed and combed my hair with his fingers until I fell asleep. And when I woke up the next morning I laced my fingers into his because we were in sanctuary. Because all he knew how to do was give and I was sucking him dry, but I didn't want to. I was trying not to.
I had it easy, too. Alice didn't bruise him with purpose. She didn't say come close, oh no, that's too far. He was easy to put back together when she tore him apart because it was accidental. But Edward, god, he came after me with knives drawn every time and he knew that he tore at me and he just kept letting Jasper put me back together but that day it changed. Because if Edward was tearing me, well wasn't I letting him? So I closed the window and I told him no because even if I'm the worst person I know, at the very least, I can afford to be kind to Jasper. And can't that kindness be enough?
# # #
The night of Winter Formal and we're all going together in Rosalie's mom's Escalade. Oh no, that's not too awkward. Not with Edward looking at Bella like she's something to eat, and Jasper looking at Alice like he's gonna come out of his pants if he doesn't get to touch her. And I admit it, our ladies looked hot. Bella in pink, Alice in white and my girl Rose in black velvet. Mm mm mm I can't wait to slide that zipper down later.
For a bunch of people going to a party, nobody seems very happy, Rose is pissed that we didn't get a limo. Jasper's pissed at the way Edward's looking at Bella and Bella seems like she's about to be sick and who could blame her the way her head keeps spinning between Whitlock and Cullen. Little Alice is just staring out the window. Fuck, she has nice legs. Then I decide that it's officially time to chill this shit down, so I pull out a flask and take a sip and pass it around. And yeah, mistake.
Because Bella takes a sip and then Cullen grabs it from her as she's passing it to Jasper and then he passes it to Jasper and Jasper's not drinking after Cullen so he hands it to Alice who sips and hands it back to him and then Bella tries not to show that she caught that shit and I'm glad that I have a lot more booze because it's gonna take more than a sip to mellow this shit out. If Jasper has a joint he should be passing that baby out right now but I'ma guess he doesn't cuz he ain't passing shit.
This is gonna be one long, fucked up night.
# # #
Oh sweet Jesus, Bella, please fuck me. She came walking out of Alice's house in that fucking dress and I swear to Christ I haven't been this hard in. Fuck, I have never been this hard. I don't know what the fuck happened, because Alice told me she got Bella this green dress. Emerald green and it was perfect she said, but then Bella comes walking out in this pale pink thing, all gauzy and soft against her skin and her lips are pinker and her eyes are fucking huge and her arms are bare and her hair is long and wavy and pulled back on one side and just want to grab a handful of it and smell it because that's the scent that brings it all back - that one perfect day with her when I was my best self for her and I gave her every part of me and I gave her all of my heart and she was perfect and soft and fragile and my heart was so fucking big inside my chest just touching her skin. But because I am Edward Cullen I fucked it all up.
And every night that I would work up the nerve to come to her window I'd tell myself that I would tell her, that I love her, that I need her that I can be what she needs me to be, what she wants and instead I just talked and talked and talked and told her everything except that one thing she needed to hear from me and I just don't know how to give her that.
And then that fucking bitch kicked me out. No more window, no more bed, no more Bella and fuck me. No more Bella because she's with Jasper and I didn't see it before I sure as fuck see that shit now, the way she touches him all the fucking time. How he keeps looking at her and they're talking in their heads to each other, you can see that shit and, oh, fuck, the way she just tugs on his collar and he gets up and follows and when they come back she's flushed and fucking exquisite and he does that to her and I fucking hate him. Like that shit tonight when Bella got in the back and Jasper looks up and kisses the inside of her wrist and then he puts a fucking flower in her hair. A fucking orchid. It's pink and matches her dress perfectly and now she's just pinks and browns and all that creamy skin and when he's done with that flower he fucking lifts a lock of her hair and he smells it and she turns to him and smiles that secret Bella smile and I am so mother fucked.
It's all a big fucking game of pretend anyway, because you can see it on his face tonight, how much he wants Alice and I wish to fuck I could make her want him and I don't care if it fucking breaks Bella's heart because I need her to open her window back up and if Jasper isn't holding on to her then she will. I know she will. I just have to get back inside.
# # #
I don't know what her fucking problem is, I mean really. First I pick out the most perfect dress in the world for her, oceans of emerald green satin and she would have looked perfect in it, but nooo, little miss rebel's gotta go pick out her own damn dress and yeah, it looks great, okay, better than great but that's not the point. The point is that she was supposed to be wearing green because it was the exact shade of Edward's eyes and if Jasper thought she picked that out herself then he would see that she still wants Edward and in the photos everyone would notice that Bella's dressed matched Edward's eyes and then Jasper could dump her and Edward could get her and that would be that.
Anyway, at least Emmett brought vodka.
And how come Stephan didn't ask me to the dance? God, I bet he looks so good tonight. I bet he wears Armani. And who did he end up taking anyway? Whatever, I know he's going to want to dance with me tonight. I look incredible, if I do say so myself. And Jasper looks good tonight. I mean, wow, in a tux and he's clean shaven and not wearing a t-shirt for a change and Jasper in a tux. Huh.
I hate these things though. They're always tacky with crepe paper decorations and everyone leaves by nine anyway. They only stay long enough to take pictures and half the people rent limos for the night and how trite is that? I'm just glad that Emmett's parents are out of town because the party at his house is going to be the best one yet. I wonder if I can get Stephan to come? He might have fun, even if it is a bunch of high school kids. What he's even doing in high school is beyond me, I mean, geez. The rest of these people belong here but once you reach a certain level of chic, you should be exempt from the banality of high school.
Oh. Right. Slow song. Gotta go dance with Jasper. Why Edward didn't pick Rosalie for this game is beyond me, but he made me promise – every slow song I would try to dance with Jasper. I think it's dumb, I mean, how much better to piss him off if Bella's dancing with Edward all night while Jasper just sits there, but, I told him we would use his plan if that's what he wants. He's just so hell bent and pacing and you know, I bet if he'd just sleep with her he'd be over it. She's not that pretty.
# # #
I don't know why I said yes. Probably because Jasper was dancing with Alice and god she looked amazing tonight. Tiny little white slip dress with black beaded dangly things and her spiky hair finally all grown out in to the prettiest black bob. How could Jasper resist? And every chance she gets she's taking him by the hand and pulling him out to dance with her and he's so tall and she's so small and I'm like a fucking mutant next to her.
So when Edward asks me to dance and the blood in my veins is feeling spikey from the vodka I say yes and try not to look at him with her and fuck, why do I feel like crying? When Edward's pulling me right up close to him, his hand at the small of my back and yeah, he's dazzling me with that look, those green, green eyes and I know that I could just melt into him tonight. I should tell Jasper to stay with Alice and I could just melt into Edward and I could just give. Give in give out give up just give.
Give him everything that he wants from me, and know it's just tonight, and know that tomorrow it'll be done. Know that tomorrow there will be no more Jas but if that means that I never hurt him again, then that would be a good thing, the right thing. I could just open the window again and cut myself to shreds again for Edward, for him, always for him. I'm tired of looking at Jasper with Alice and I'm tired of the way that Edward's pulling me in and I'm god damned tired of like the worst fucking person ever and I just want it done and over already.
Make a choice, Alice, I want to say and then she's walking into the bathroom and I'm following her because, fuck, I'm so ready to just give.
She's standing at the mirror and, I'm not fucking kidding you, she's powdering her chest. Straight out of fucking 1928 this girl. She's touching up her lipstick and her mouth is a big round red O and I want to fucking slap it.
So I say it's time to make a choice, Alice. She looks at me like what the fuck and I say it again and she says about what and I say Jasper because you can't just keep him dangling like this and you can't come in here all beautiful and shiny and dance so close to him and not take him home tonight and if you do that then you better for fuck's sake mean it because if you don't I will cut your fucking heart out bitch. She's still staring at me with the big red O and I say it again. You take him home tonight and you mean it.
And that's what I can give to Jasper. I can give him her love. I can push her his way and I can let him have his heart unbroken with her. Because I know that she'll be kind to him, not razor blades like Edward. Do it, I say and when I walk away she's still standing there, staring, and I walk right into Edward and he scoops me up and starts dancing with me again and motherfuck don't they play anything with a pulse? One more slow song and I will not be able to keep my shit together anymore.
Then like magic, like fucking Hollywood movie magic, Jasper is there and he's got his hand out for me and Edward is looking like he wants to kill him and says she's busy and Jasper says she's my date and I'm here to dance with her and Edward says you should have gotten there earlier and god he's such a prick because we all know what he's saying there and I hate him for being so mean. Jasper tells him to cut it out and knock it off and then he says how many more times are you going to break her before you quit? I just turn and walk away because I don't want Jasper to see me cry and someone follows me to the parking lot and if it's Jasper then that's just wrong because he should be in there, with Alice, who will be kind. And if it's Edward well then I guess that's right because even though I want him he's a punishment and I deserve it.
From behind the steps are coming faster and I start to run and he says Trix and I am so fucking grateful that my knees give out and a second later I'm on the fucking ground in my perfect dress that Jasper gave me, tied up with a bow in a big white box, and I've ruined it just like I'll ruin him. Then he's wrapped around me and picking me up and he says oh, little Bellatrix and then he's carrying me somewhere and I think I should be crying harder but how hard can I cry when I'm wrapped up in Jas? Perfect Jas.
He sits us down on a bench and I say I'm so sorry for ruining the dress and he says cher, nothing's ruined and he shows me the dress and it's still perfect and he dusts off my knees and then he gets onto his knees and he blows on them and they feel better. He looks into my eyes and I'm really good at breaking my own heart. Who needs Edward Cullen?
Go back in, I say. Alice is waiting for you.
He looks at me and he looks back and then he looks at me. She is, I say again. Alice is waiting for you. Go get her, Jasper. You love her, you love her so much. Go. And he stands up and he stands still, just quiet for a minute. He stares at me and finally says you gotta dance with the girl who brung you, cher.
He takes my hand in his and fuck, I am such a fucking mess and he walks me to his house, which isn't far away. And I say, it's okay, Jasper, you can take me home. I slip off my shoes and I walk to his truck which is really a beast with a motor, some old Suburban or Bronco or something monstrous. He's giving me this funny look, like I'm not very smart and that's not a very Jasper look and it's definitely not a Jas look so I say what and he opens the car door for me and I'm glad that he's going to take me home. I'm glad because if I don't get there soon I'm going to break open and if he sees me crying I will never be able to face him again.
We get to my street and he pulls over to the side but not yet up to my house and he pushes the seat back and says we should talk, you think, and I say don't need to talk so much, Jasper. Just let me go and then you go back to the gym or over to Emmett's and find her and he's quiet and thinking and he says that's what you want and I say yeah, but will you please promise to still be my friend? And we both know that this is a bullshit promise because you can't be with someone like that and still be friends. You can't spend two days tangled up in someone's smell and then be friends. But I need the promise, the lie, to let him go.
Give us a kiss, then, cher he says and I slide over on the seat and it starts out soft but then I'm fucking so pissed off because I don't want him to go back there and I don't want him to let me go and fuck Alice for being so sweet and fuck Edward Cullen and fuck the open windows too because if I'd never wanted him so much I could have had this instead. I start kissing harder and he is too and then I'm pulling his hair and his fingers are pinching my nipple through my dress and it's hard and it hurts and that's good because it should hurt and I say yes and harder and more and he does it. He hurts me and I'm hurting him back, all fingernails and teeth and pinching grinding groaning and three minutes later he's inside of me and there's no condom and it fucking hurts the way he slams into me but that's good too and underneath that pain there's something else and then I forget that I want it to hurt I just want more and I open my eyes and he's looking at me with the same surprise and we're just going and going and then I'm coming and it's so fucking hard and fast and hard and good, god so, so good and before I can even breathe he's coming too and we've never done it without a condom even though I'm on the pill and it's so good, so much better, so much more to feel him still hard inside of me and all that wet and fuck, I love him.
For the second time tonight I am surprised.
I can't ask him to stay which is the only thing I want to say as we lay there, panting. I can't ask him not to go back there now that I've told him he has to and so I start to ease myself off of him and he just sort of clutches at me so I settle back down and then he reaches between us and zips his pants.
He says cher, we've made a mess and then he pulls up his hand from between us and it's wet and sticky and so are his pants and you know what, I don't give a fuck about Alice and her sweet, so I look into his eyes and I lick his fingers clean and he shivers and he says Bellatrix? You want to go for a ride, get out of this place? I say yes and four hours later we're in Portland and checking into some brownstone hotel. I call Charlie and say friends for the weekend and he says okay because he doesn't ask too many questions and I don't get into trouble and then I turn off my phone and Jasper turns off his and we shove them in a drawer and now I guess we'll find some things out.
# # #
Trix, I say. Have you ever been to the Grand Canyon? She looks up at me, big doe eyes and candy mouth and I try hard not to think about her licking my fingers but god damn that was sexy and so very Trix. She shakes her head and the elevator door opens.
We walk into the room and she slips off my tux jacket and I'm glad my shirt was long enough to cover the cum all over my pants. She unbuttons the shirt, not meeting my eyes. She slips it off of me and leads me to the bathroom and runs the shower. I'm glad because there's dried cum all over my dick and it's starting to get itchy but I don't think this is about that.
She turns her back to me and I unzip the zipper, my finger tracing the curve of her shoulder and I reach down to kiss. She hasn't said a word since she said yes, and I don't know yet why she's here, but I don't think that I can come back from the edge.
She still has the orchid in her hair. I lean in to smell it and then I pluck it out and set it on the counter. She reaches out and strokes it. I finger the strap of her dress and then it pools at her feet. I found it in the front window of a thrift shop in Port Angeles. I was looking for vinyl and I saw it and it was nothing but her. Pure pink. I bought it and brought it back to her and she took it and twirled, holding it up to herself and why, hello there, Grand Canyon.
I nudge her shoulder and turn her around and that's when I realize that I am not the man I thought I was. Tiny bruises all over her chest and arms. Tiny bruises from my fingers. Tiny bruises from my pain.
I close my eyes and slump back against the wall. I hurt you, I say, shaking my head. No, she says. I wanted it. I wanted you to hurt me. I can't even ask her why. I know this is not her flavor of kink. She turns pink and looks down and I can hardly hear her whisper above the noise of the water. I didn't want you to leave, she says. I have to smile and then I laugh. Trix, cher? Then why did you tell me to go, I ask and she looks up at me a little hopeless and says Alice.
Sweet Alice looking like she just climbed off a movie screen tonight, all white satin and black hair and tiny and beautiful. Sweet Alice taking my hand, over and over, pushing herself up against me, leaning her little head on my chest and swaying her hips to the oh so slow beat of the music. Sweet Alice. It was just like I hoped it would be. Like she opened her eyes one day and saw me standing there. When she walked out of the girls room she came right up to me and she tugged me down to her and said can we get out of here and slipped her tiny hand in mine.
But it didn't fit right. And Sweet Alice smelled all wrong. And if Cullen runs his finger along Bella's bare shoulder one more time I'm going to have to hurt him for touching my girl.
Then I sat back a second and realized some things. That Sweet Alice was asking me home. That Cullen still loved my Bella-trix. That she was my girl, my Bella, my Trix. Mine.
I said excuse me to Alice and went to dance with my girl because I hadn't all night and what the fuck is Cullen playing at, anyway? And he's got his hand at the small of her back like it belongs there, like she belongs there and I've got to say something and we go at it a little and my Bella-trix runs away and Cullen watches but I go after her and she falls down as Trix is wont to do. I pick her up and she's going on and on about go back to Alice, take me home and go back to Alice and is that what she wants?
I realize as we pull on to her street that I don't. Don't want Alice don't want to go back don't want to let go of my little Bella-trix. But if she does, she does. So she says can we be friends and cher, you can't be just friends now and I think that's sadder than her telling me to go to Alice. Telling me to take my happiness. Not knowing that it's her.
Give us a kiss then, I say because if she's kicking me out, it's the least she can do. She leans over and kisses me and it's soft and slow and sweet like always but then she's shaking and it's harder and fuck her if she doesn't want this, if she doesn't want me because I want her, I want to give her every sweet thing and if she doesn't want that then fuck her. I'm so mad at her and I want her to hurt.
I have my hands on her and she has her hands on me and she's pulling my hair and I pinch her nipple hard and she says yes, harder so I do, harder, and I'm grabbing and pinching and her hands are on my zipper and she pulls me out and she's right on top of me and I just grab her hips and pull her hard down on me and it fucking hurt because she wasn't ready and I wanted it to hurt. But then it didn't hurt and I was fucking her hard because I wanted her to see me damn it and she opened her eyes and she did. And then she was screaming and she was screaming it out for me. I knew it then: there was no place left for me but her.
So I say as much. I say cher, you want to take a ride? Get out of this place? And she says yes and now I'm in a hotel bathroom looking at her bruised and smiling. I take off my clothes and I let her lead me into the shower.
There in the water we wash it all away. I let go of Sweet Alice, who doesn't feel or smell right. I kiss the bruises and she washes my hair and then combs through it with her fingers and in her eyes are wide open spaces and no more fences and I can see that she has given him up.
The water is so hot and she's trembling and I say cher? And she clings tight to me and whispers, again so low I almost can't hear, she says please, and she's begging me to love her.
My heart breaks because in the water there's tears. I cup her face up to mine, I catch her doe eyes with mine and I say to her plain, so she doesn't misunderstand I say cher, Trix, don't you know that I love you? I am so in love with you. Then more tears and then I understand them, understand this whole night, finally, because she was walking on that edge too. How did that happen?
And then we are children. We play in the water and we play with the towels and we play on the bed and there is laughter and giggles and tickling and licking and gentle touches and then harder too and candymouth all over me and oh fuck yes. When we're done (but never really done) it's touches again, her lazy fingers on my back drawing wide loops of infinity and I can fall asleep knowing that it's mine, the candymouth, and there is nothing more between us. Not now, not ever.
When I wake up she's curled up in the chair, wearing her dress and my jacket, watching me sleep. I open one eye and she gives me that smile, the slow and sweet one that promises Sunday mornings forevermore.
A knock at the door interrupts her smile and she comes back to me with pancakes and coffee for her and tea for me, a package of white t-shirts and boxer shorts and jeans and flip flops and she says I didn't think you'd want to wear your tux pants again and she's right. I raise my eyebrows and she says concierge and god damn I've got the best fucking girl in the world, you know?
We spend the whole day and night in bed and it's sweet and rough and hard and soft and it's just fucking everything, because I know that if I press here and if I lick there that she will shiver and give it up, and she does, again and again but this time it's better, thicker, more. This time it's love and I just can't explain that shit any better than that.
Late that night she's sad though and I raise my eyebrow because I want to know and she says she never wants to leave. Now this is an easy enough fix so I say Trix, aren't we on winter break? Her face lights up like the fourth of July and yeah. That's my girl. We call our folks and they're okay with our lies. We ignore the missed calls from our friends because what could they say?
We spend the next day in bed again and the next three we spend roaming around the city, pretending to be grown-ups. We buy some clothes and some Christmas gifts and she's throwing money into paper cups everywhere and one time she misses and a dime goes rolling into the street and she says sorry and picks it up out of the gutter and drops it into the cup of a thin man in a green coat. He and I just stare at each other over her head and then she tugs on my sleeve and we're moving again. We play hopscotch in the park and we eat at restaurants every night and I teach her to play poker until she finally wins all of my money which of course she turns around and gives back to me, because Machiavelli or no, she can't go for the kill. We took the MAX to the farmer's market where I bought her as many bunches of flowers as her arms could hold and our room reeked of them until we left.
And she is beautiful, beautiful so beautiful that I ached. I ached to know what thoughts were in her head and if I was holding her hand I ached to kiss her and if I was kissing her I ached to be inside of her and every time I caught her eye I knew that she ached too.
The morning that we were checking out, she looked up at me, all big brown eyes and she says Jas, did you want to go to the Grand Canyon? And I say cher, I think we're already there. And that's how we fell over the edge. And that's how we kept on falling.
AN: So, wow. I can't even begin to thank you all for the support. This was just a thing that entered my head and I started writing and here it is. I think there's two more chapters. And, sorry - I honestly don't know how it ends. I can tell you that Alice and Edward are scheming. But that's all I got. And sorry this is so long - I couldn't find a good spot to break it in two. anyway, thank you for reading and thank you for the comments and the alerts and all of it. Thank you.