Hello, boys and girls! Ready for a lesson with Mr. Q? Oh, I'm sure you're all just dying to hear what I have for you today.

You see this? This is an Omega molecule. Pretty, isn't it? Yes, I can see your primitive minds lighting up inside like magpies noticing a shiny bit of string. And what a shiny string this is. The Omega molecule, you see, is the most powerful substance natural to your universe. Oh, you could punch a hole through space-time to the quasar source and make a quasar and then harvest it for energy, but technically that involves energy from outside your dimension. Whereas an Omega molecule was one of the building blocks of your universe -- the substrate of proto-universes, as it were. One such molecule could power your entire civilization for the next ten thousand years. But then, you know that already, don't you? That's why you're trying to build one.

Why, with such power you could be like gods. After all, with the building blocks of a proto-universe in your hands, you could build your own universe, manufacture pocket dimensions at will and reshape reality to your liking. I can tell you've put some serious thought into what you'd do with such power. Travel in time? Manufacture your very own planets? Annihilate your enemies with a thought? Store transport patterns in static offline storage so no one need ever die? Oh, lots of ideas there. Come on, let's hear some more. There are no stupid ideas here. Only stupid people.

Because, you see, trying to be like gods isn't a good idea at all when you're not gods. Didn't you see the warning that said "Don't try this at home, kids?"

You do know what happened to the monobloc, right? The proto-matter that existed before your universe did, the superconcentrated bloc of substance that expanded and became your universe? It was made of lots of Omega molecules, you know. Lots and lots. Now, I realize that unlike me, you've never actually seen the Big Bang, but you do know it was a bang, right? A big one? Which sorta kinda implies, I don't know... an explosion?

Sooo... what do you think happens when you actually get that molecule formed?

A new universe is created? Oh, close! Give that man a gold star. It would create a new universe, if you had enough of them. But since you've only got one... all it will do is overwrite a small section of your universe. Now I realize that none of you have any real experience with computers anymore, now that they work so well they're almost transparent, but do you know what happens if your computer attempts to save new data to an area that's already got old data in it, and the attempt fails?

Yes, that's right. The old data gets corrupted. Or erased.

The Omega molecule is a marvelous tool for corrupting and erasing huge sectors of the space you live in. Now, it's nothing to me, really. I had a dozen Omega molecules for breakfast today, with cream and extra sugar. You want to go rewriting your universe with incomplete, damaged creations? Not my problem, I don't live here. I just visit this place. But you might have wanted to consider the consequences of your actions before you started the synthesis process.

Sorry, it's not going to shut down anymore. You've gone too far. The reaction is going to overload in five seconds. Well, it would, except that I've stopped time so I can have this little conversation with you folks. Your nice shiny beautiful molecule of godlike power is about to scatter your molecules, and those of a significant portion of the real estate of your galaxy, to the ionic winds. Ever wondered what it was like to be pure hydrogen? Well, after the Omega molecule goes boom and breaks every atomic bond in your bodies, reducing you to a collection of naked protons, which will promptly collect up the loose electrons hanging around and become hydrogen atoms, you'll find out!

Now, this presents me with a bit of a conundrum. Because after you're all completely annihilated, and space-time is ripped to shreds in this region of space so thoroughly that warp drives will no longer function, and your entire planet ceases to exist because you were such incredible morons that you tried to do this experiment on A PLANETARY SURFACE, and as a result your race will be largely made extinct and the few scattered survivors out on trade ships or colony worlds will have no idea what happened to the rest of you... well, that's just the problem. No one in your universe will have any idea what happened to the rest of you. And that means that no one will get the object lesson that maybe, just possibly, beings made of matter should not fuck around with Omega molecules.

And, y'know, as a teacher of mortals... that kind of offends me. If you're going to spectacularly die and kill your entire civilization in a feat of outrageous stupidity and hubris, the least you could do is be an object lesson to the rest of the galaxy.

So I'm gonna offer you guys a deal. As soon as I leave this place, time will resume, and you will all have five seconds to live. There's no time to get to escape vehicles, even if any of them could outrun the destruction, which they can't... once it blows, it will take about thirteen nanoseconds to annihilate your entire solar system, and your cute little starships just can't go that fast. You won't even have time to call your loved ones at home to say you love them, let alone "Sorry I fucked up and killed us all" or "Hey, hope you're flexible enough to bend over and kiss your ass goodbye".

But I will take one of you with me. One of you gets to survive the devastation and warn the rest of the galaxy. One of you will live to report on what, exactly, unstable Omega molecules do, in hopes that other mortals will learn from the example of your civilization and not do this anymore. In fact, that one who lives will get to be immortal, or a near-facsimile of it anyway, because he or she is going to have to travel the galaxy warning the other warp-capable civilizations that messing with Omega molecules is what we call a Don't Do That error.

Nice, huh? Most of you will be wiped out in an instant, but one of you will get to live forever, to spread the word. Now I want the vote to be unanimous. All the living mortals in this room need to choose the same mortal to be the one who'll carry the message, and survive. And I'll stay here for what will seem to you to be a day and a night, until you pick. Now you can be civilized, and vote on it, and unanimously pick the same person to be the sole survivor of your entire civilization. But if you can't agree... well, if after a day and a night you haven't unanimously selected someone, all of you will die.

By the way, dead mortals don't get a vote anymore. Just a thought, if you're having some difficulty getting unanimity.

So, how's about it? Get voting, people. Decide who will live with the guilt of having annihilated your entire world, for eternity, and who are the rest who will be killed for the egregious stupidity and hubris of all of you five seconds after I leave here.

I'm waiting...

Author's Note: No, I have no idea what species the people he's talking to are... probably not human, because by the time humans started investigating the Omega molecule we had already expanded to multiple colony worlds, so we wouldn't have wiped ourselves out of existence. But I was wondering, if the unstable Omega molecule tends to blow up entire planets, and destroys subspace in the general area... how did anyone ever live long enough after such an explosion to be able to explain to other species that it's the Omega molecule that did the damage?