"And now I'm watching you, watching me Sirius Black
From beyond places that I believe in,
And as I hear your way with words
I lose where mine have been,
It's like every page we took
Was from a fairytale picture book…
I'd forgotten how happy we'd looked"
-The Mirror Song by Alan Lastufka and Tom Milsom (Feat. Kristina Horner)
He shouldn't have been there, but he was anyways. No one would recognize the large, fluffy dog walking around the graveyard in Godric's Hollow. And even if they knew hew was an animagus, who would do anything about it?
He reached their shared grave and bowed his head in shame. He shouldn't have given up being their secret keeper. He would've died before giving up their location to Voldemort. If he hadn't been such a coward, they'd still be alive. Harry would have his parents.
But he brought them flowers. It wasn't much, but it was better than nothing. So he leaves the daisies to rest against the grave. They're yellow, and the roots are still attached to the bottom, the dirt sticking to them.
As he walks away, he knows that James would be laughing at him right now, and Lily would smile gently and appreciate the thought.
No one saw the glistening tear in the dog's eye as he walked away.
He visits every year on the same day: Halloween. It's the anniversary of their death, and Remus feels like it's his responsibility to take care of their grave.
Harry doesn't know where his parents are buried, Peter is dead, Sirius is in Azkaban, and all of their other friends are dead. And it's not as if he can count on the Dursleys to care for it. It's his job.
He crouches down and performs a quick cleaning spell on the grave and watches the dirt, dust, and other things that don't belong there fade away. The names, James and Lily Potter, are now prominent and easy to read.
It's shining now, and Remus feels good about himself and his friends. As much as he wishes that they could be there with him, he knows that they're better off where they are.
He blames himself entirely the last time he visits their grave. He feels like he should have been able to done something more to help them. He shouldn't have taken James' cloak, he should have given them more protection and advice, he should've done something.
But he didn't, and now they're just as dead as his mother and sister, who are only resting not too far away. More blood on his hands by default.
He knows this is his last visit. He'll be taking Harry to find the locket horcrux tomorrow, and he'll be dead soon enough, perhaps joining them wherever they are. As soon as he sees them, he'll beg for their forgiveness. It will be his one last hope for salvation.
He makes himself invisible, this time without the cloak, and leaves back for Hogwarts.
He could never bring himself to visit her grave, and it's something he brings himself to regret in his dying moments as he stares at an exact replica of her eyes. Perhaps if she hadn't been buried with Potter, he would have seen it. But she was buried with her husband, and he couldn't pay respects to him.
No, anyone but him.
Sometimes he liked to imagine that there was something on the tombstone that alluded to him, but he knows that there was nothing. He had been replaced with Potter, and Lily left him behind. He even deluded himself into thinking that she thought of him as she died, but he knew that she thought of her son.
He wants to be buried in the same graveyard as her.
The first time he saw their graves, it was almost too overwhelming. He wouldn't have lasted without Hermione there. But over time it grows easier.
He takes care of them. He only lives down the street now, and he's there almost every day. Sometimes he talks to them. They can't physically hear him, but he feels like they're listening to him somehow. They never really left him.
The graveyard is familiar, and he begins to take care of the surrounding graves he recognizes. Kendra and Ariana Dumbledore always have sparkling graves. So does Ignotus. He even keeps their friends' graves clean (he learned about them by letters, pictures, and other things he found in Sirius' house).
When he and Ginny die, they'll be buried right next to them.
He never met them, and he never will (unless he meets them after death), but he feels obligated to carry on what his father started.
He still lives in Godric's Hollow, but he doesn't have to. Lily and James have moved out of their childhood town, but he can't bring himself to join them. There's something nostalgic about the place, especially the graveyard, and he knows that he'll never be able to leave.
The graves his father kept clean are always spotless. His father taught him everything he knows about the people there. He used to join him when he would come home on holiday break.
His grandparents always have the most well taken care of grave. His father was a hero, but he feels as though his grandparents were even bigger heroes.
So, he visits them everyday just to say hello.
I like this a lot. This is my first post of the day. I'll be posting at least five stories today in honor of Harry and Jo's birthdays. Let me know what you think!
Disclaimer: Jo (happy birthday to her) owns everything in this story.