Genso Suikoden- Motherhood

fic by Raven Chaos

Disclaimer: I don't own Genso Suikoden 1,2,3, or Gaiden.
I don't even know where to find Gaiden. I geuss that's
one drawback from being American.

Authors note: I was playing through Suikoden 1 for
the second time, when I recalled the little talk
between Cleo and Sonya in the Dungeon of the castle.
This is my take on Sonya's feelings towards McDohl.

Setting: three years after Suikoden 1, but before
suikoden 2.

General Sonya was finishing up at the palace when she
decided to check on Lord McDohl. When she poked her head
into his office, she found him asleep at his desk, using
a half-finished proposal as a pillow. She smiled to
herself as she meandered around the large desk. But
once again, Cleo's words echoed in her ears...

"You're the woman who could have been Young Masters Mother."

She played the memory in her mind, of that day in the
dungeon ofCastle Bahamut, right before the young master in
question asked her to join them in her cause.
Absently, without thinking, Sonya found herself gently
running her fingers through McDohls long dark hair, his
trademark bandana for the moment being used as a temporary
bandage for a wound on his left hand.
Sonya knew McDohl had no mother...or a father anymore.
All he had in the way of family was Gremio and Cleo.
Perhaps...if things were different...If Windy had never
started the feud with her sister...If McDohl hadn't run off...
If she could have just told Teo how she felt before he ventured
Yes, maybe then...she could have been McDohls mother.

Gremio looked up from his late afternoon reading to answer
a knock at the manor door. Lady Sonya stood outside in the coming
night, with a sleeping McDohl cradeled in her arms.
"Why...General Sonya...What happened? Is young master alright?"
Gremio asked as he shut the door behind Sonya as she entered.
"Everything is well, Gremio." She smiled. "His rooms upstairs
and to the left, right?"
"Um...yes ma'am." Gremio nodded as Sonya ventured upstairs.

Sonya sat down on the edge of McDohls bed, shifting the youths
weight in her arms. She remembered how her own mother held her like
this when she was little. Of course, McDohl wasn't a little girl. He
was a 17 year old man. And a heavy one at that.
McDohl stirred in her embrace, his right hand shifting around
onto her arm. There, Sonya found herself staring at the Soul Eater
in the pale moon light. With her own right hand, she traced a finger
over the marking. It was because of this that the war tore a
potential husband and son from her life.
The thought alone brought back the tears she reserved for
mourning Teo. To think, she could have had a family by now. Teo
would still be alive, and maybe young McDohl could have had a
brother or sister.
All that was a dream now. All McDohl knew of Sonya was that
she was another member of hs army. She was a friend to him, not
a mother. Not another potential girlfriend. He saw her in the
same light he looked at Gremio or Camille.

She must have been crying, for she was shaking all over.
She tried to stop, fearing her boss would wake up and find one
of his generals cradeling him like a baby.
Sonya closed her eyes and took a few deep breathes. Yes,
she probably could never be the mother-figure she wanted to be
to McDohl, but she could still watch him grow, if that cursed rune
allowed that. She would stand by him as a general and his friend.
That was good enough, wasn't it?

After a minute or two, Sonya stood and lay McDohl on his bed,
pulling the heavy quilt over him. She kneeled by his bedside, resting
her chin on her arms that were folding on the end of the bed. For the
longest time, she just watched him sleep, listening to the steady rythem
of his breath.
He looked so peaceful when she slept. These days, he could rest,
knowing he was loved. By the people of Toran. By the many women that
throw themselves at him daily. By Gremio. By Cleo. By Sonya herself.
She by all means admitted to herself she loved him. But it wasn't the
kind of love given to him by Kasumi the ninja girl. Sonya loved him
with a protective love. To care for him. To make sure he doesn't
make decisions he'll regret.

Sonya looked up at the bedroomn clock. It was well after 10 at night.
She stood from where she knelt and made sure McDohl was tucked in. Smiling to
herself sadly, she bent down and kissed him on the cheek.
" son." She whispered as she shut the door as she left.

In the darkness of the room, save for the moonlight spilling in from
the window, McDohl rolled onto his side.
"...Goodnight, mother."