Hey there! My second time writing in english and I hope I'm not doing any hard mistakes (that's the reason I write with such formality). I'm trying to do my best!

Despite the plot, this is more of humor fic! Official paring Always! And...I don't own Slayers!

Hope you enjoy it!


"Zelgadis-san! You're going to join me in the greatest quest there has been in history!"- the priestess pointed at him, having one foot on the table and another one on the chair she was sat a second ago. He raised one eyebrow, looking at her, while giving a sip to his cup of coffee.

They were having their male at the restaurant of their inn. Lina and Gourry had left them to buy some supplies for their next journey. The sorceress-sword man would have joined them if Amelia hadn't stopped him saying she had something important to discuss with him.

Nonetheless, the sight of her justice-freak friend making poses in a public place and attracting the gawps of every client of the inn, made him think he might have made a wrong choice.

"First of all, pointing is rude (you should know that by now!). Seconds, who said I was going to take part in whatever- I actually don't want to know- proposal you were going to make to me."- he declared, having another sip of his coffee.

"I really wasn't going to propose anything…"- she though loudly with a shy pose and a slight blush across her face. Zel just didn't get it.

"You act all shy now…but you're indeed standing on table in a middle of a restaurant…¬ ¬ "- he mumbled to himself with a sweatdropp on his head. But, Amelia snapped out of her daydreaming and faced his partner again (ignoring what he just said).

"You can't say no before hearing me out!"- she moaned.

"I don't need to hear to know I'm not interested..."- he replied curtly to her.

"Don't you know which day is it? It's Valentine's day!"

"Again, you aren't listening to me, Amelia…"- he muttered to himself frustrated. He was just used to the fact the princess ignored him when something got into her head.

"Valentine's day is the day of love! when cupid brings couple together ~ when the miracle of love grows in the air ~"- she spoke with her eyes lighting and her hands on her chest. A vein started tickling on the blue forehead of the chimera, who was sick of hearing that loans of corny crap.

"Get to the point already!"- he complaint, making her fall from her chair at the sudden shout of his friends.

"Right…"- raising on her feet slowly and caring the pain on her back - "I'm saying all this because I was thinking about us"

Zelgadis spilled out all the coffee. He coughed a lot, getting more blue than he already was.

-"Are you okay, Zelgadis?"- Amelia asked, approaching to him.

The chimera avoided her eyes nervously, hiding his blush from her. How can this be…Is she meaning…can it be possible…is she saying…

Don't be so stupid! Stop rambling and act like a man! He sat properly on his chair as if nothing had happened.

"wha-what about us?…"- he really hated himself for stammering when he was trying to look "cool" in front of her.

"We must get Lina and Gourry together, by any means necessary!"- she said, making his partner fall off his chair- "We ought to be cupid to save our friends Valentine's day!"- she declared, jumping again on the table to make her triumphal pose.

"I should have seen this coming…stupid of me…"- he muttered to himself with his eyebrows frowned– "…I knew it wasn't even worth hearing…"- he grunted and left the table, leaving the priestess quite stunned.

"Zelgadis-san, aren't you going to help me??"

"Of course not!"- he replied tactlessly, trying to leave but his partner pull him from his sleeve.

"Don't you care about your friends' happiness?"

"That isn't their happiness but yours."- he replied to her angrily – "Stop wasting your time! Don't you see they would always be like that? Lina is too antisocial and Gourry is too dense for them to having a romance cliché! One of this days, you'll have to accept that they would always be like that. They would always be an unstable - kind of - couple."

"That's why we have to give them a push!"- Amelia stated and got to her usual pose, raising her finger and winking her eye- "and Valentine's day is our chance to make it happen!"

"You're the only one here that wants it to make it happen. I don't want to waste my times in impossible things…"- taking advantage of the fact that Amelia let go her sleeve, he started to take off the inn, ignoring the princess complains.

"Zelgadis-san, giving up that easily won't help you in life…"- a familiar voice said from nowhere.

The people in the tavern freaked out. As if a loony priestess wasn't enough to scare the hell out of them! Finally the owner of the voice made his appearance in the middle of the tavern, making the people shriek in fear.

"Xellos-san? What are you doing here?? This lovely day of the year isn't it mortal for a demon like you?"

"Unless…you spend time with the single ladies who are remember of their loneliness and ugliness in this day ^_^"

"What brings you here, Xellos? There isn't anyone here who is glooming for being alone in this stupid day…"- Zelgadis intruded in the chat, scowling at the demon.

"I bet."- the demon replied to him with his annoying smirk, receiving a glare from the chimera as response- "but as incredible it may sound, I'm actually here to help Amelia-san"

"huh?"- Zel gasped.

"Really?!"- Amelia was shocked too, but she quickly understand it- "You finally have decided to abandon your demoniac nature and become a good person by helping our friends in need!"-

"Yes…"-Xellos replied with sweatdropp in his head- "…that how it is…"

"BE SERIOUS!!"- Zelgadis shouted to the little princess, making her fall- "You can buy that bullshit! He's just into something…"- looking suspiciously to the demon with his usual expression- "I know it…"

"Calm down, Zelgadis-san…I'm honestly going to help her ^_^"

"I don't believe you!"- he replied loudly and roughly to him. And if it is like that...then something is wrong with this world!

"And what is the big deal about his real intentions? It isn't like we really can figure it out, is it? Whenever we wanted to find out, he would just said "it's a secret". Would it make a difference now?"- the princess pointed out and Xellos nodded. As much as she had a point there, Zel wasn't going to give up on it.

"Yeah, but what kind of help do you think you'll get from Xellos? Demons don't actually like corny and merry situation, you know? Quite the opposite, indeed…Aren't you worried about the tactics he's going to use with them?"- Zelgadis explained to her.

"It's okay! As far as it's useful, I don't care."- she was already decided. Zel, on the other hand, was quite crept out.

"You really are obsessed with turning them to a couple…"- he muttered, getting the chill out of him just by seeing the flame of energy growing from her eyes.

"And what about your Valentine's day, Amelia-san?"- the commentary of the demon made both human gasp- "Isn't there someone for you-"

"We need to get the plan going!"- Amelia interrupted him rudely, turning her back against them- "The objective is this: making them confess to each other!"- she spoke up, stading firmly and hiding her blush from them too.

"So, this is plan A: jealously!"- She unfolded a long parchment, containing the brilliant plan Amelia was suggesting. Both of their collaborator were looking confusedly at the poorly drawn paper – "When you're afraid the one you love might be stolen by someone else, then you won't let it to loose him. Is in it great plan? I think this will wake…"- she continued talking but neither of them were actually paying attention to anything she was saying.

"Weren't you saying you wouldn't get involve in this stupid situation, Zelgadis-san? ^_^ "- Xellos asked to the silence chimera.

"I wasn't, but I ain't comfortable with you around"- he answered coldly, with his arms folded- "…or do you think I'd buy it that you're here to play cupid?"

"Honestly? I didn't think you'd buy it…"

"Then you admit it!"

"Think whatever you please…^_^"

"GUYS!! Focus!! There is no time for reckless conversation!"- Amelia, who was tired of being ignored, yelled at her noisy pals.

"Isn't this a reckless conversation?…"- Zel grunted

"Zelgadis-san, I DID hear you…"- the princess replied to him with an angry tone of voice.

"I wasn't caring whether you hear me or not…"- he continued talking, ignoring Amelia's glare, with his eyes closed and arms folded- "Lina had got jealous many times and it didn't make her confess to Gourry. So, I don't see the point in doing this, and besides you…"- he opened one of his eyes to look at her - "Are you planning to seduce Gourry?"- he asked in a serious tone of voice but he couldn't help to frown, making it sound more like a threaten than a real question.

"Of course not!!"- She replied fearfully- "…because we aren't going to get Lina jealous but Gourry"- she indicated- "We haven't seen Gourry-san being afraid of loosing Lina-san yet. I believe he can be a bit more honest with his feeling than Lina-san is."

"Are you sure Gourry would notice? I mean, he's quiet absent-minded…"

"I'm sure he will notice. If we do this correctly, so…"- pointing at Xellos- "As you have volunteer yourself to help us, you'll be the rival"


"You really think this one can seduce Lina??"- the chimera blurted out, absolutely perplexed by the priestess's suggestion- "As much as Lina can be a demon herself, I don't think she would ever be interested in a real one…"

"Don't worry! She is going to fall for it 'cos Xellos has already hit on her, right? Although I don't know why…"

"Really?! When did that happen??"- he was completely stunned and Amelia just let out a sight. And Gourry is the dense one…

"I can say is true I flirt with her a little…"- scratching his short black hair- "Lina many times try to dig in my real identity and my true intentions towards hers. I just couldn't let her do it, hence, I use my seduction techniques to confuse her"- a lighting come from her teeth – "You should try it with her when she goes around with those unbearable speech of justice"- coding at Zelgadis, who still couldn't get through to the shock of that demon being stud muffin.

"HEY you there! Do you want a new version of "wonderful life"? Then kept your mouth close!"- she warned the demon, who shivered a little at her threaten.

"You really have a strong character, Amelia-san ^_^, very much like Lina-san…"

"And you really make people hate you…"- she scowled at him.

"Thank you for the compliment ^_^"

"Can we just start with the plan?"- she protested.

"Of course…"- the demon replied with deeper and manly voice to her, opening his amethyst eyes. Amelia blush a little with the sudden appearance of this dazzling Xellos. But she didn't saw Zel noticing it as well as his frowning at her.

"So…do you think it'd work out?"- the stud demon asked to her, who was now sure she was going to accomplish her goals.

"Of course it will! Lina can be weird girl, but a girl all the same. C'mon, Xellos-san, time to get things than!"

"Such a waste of time…"- the chimera guy muttered, letting out a sight.

Lina and Gourry were already back from their "shopping" and now they're having a meal in the inn. Xellos step into the inn to gather with the couple who were fighting over food like they'd always do. On the other side, Amelia was peeping through the window while Zelgadis was resting on a bench outside, until this lunatic crusade was over.

Xellos approached to the couple who didn't even notice his appearance.

"Lina-san…those modals don't suit a lady like you"- the demon said with deep tone of voice. Lina looked up a bit confused

"Xellos?? I didn't recognise you by your voi- WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING??!!!"- she cried when Xellos put his hand down her chin and kissed her in her cheek. Gourry just let his chicken leg fell from his hand. He was just frozen.

"I was just taking out the dirt from your face…"- he explained to her, gazing at her with his amethyst eyes and continue eating the rest of her food all over her face- "You're such a child eating but that's part of you charming, Lina-san..."

"ST-ST-STOP IT XE-XE-XE-LLO-OS!! I-I-I MEAN IT-IT!!!"- she stammered nervously; red like a tomato. She glanced at Gourry who still was on shock and then she unwillingly faced Xellos, just to learnt his lips were getting near hers – "WHA-WHA"- she babbled desperately.

"No, Xellos!! You are going a lot far than your are supposed to!"- Amelia complaint as if he could hear her- "He is going to kiss her for real!!"- but, fortunately, Gourry woke up from his shock

"DON'T DO-!!!"- he warned out, but it was too late…

"DAM BRAAASS!!!"- she squeaked, firing his spell on the demon- "DAM BRASS! DAM BRASS!! DAM BRASS!!!!!!!!"- all the inn exploded by Lina's sudden madness. Amelia covered herself so as to not get hurt. Zelgadis rushed there to learnt that Lina was standing on the inn's rubbles with her face with the same colour as her hair.

"I knew Lina-san was really antisocial and violent with guys but I never would though she would be so extreme…"- Amelia said lowly, sweating a bit.

"You know, Amelia, you should think about this over."- Zelgadis suggested to her, being a staggered himself- "If Lina gets this kind of reaction by someone hitting on her, I don't want to think what will she do if she hears a confession…"